Work Text:
Micah looked over the server app he set up. It felt so useless keeping it on his PC, now… But when would he ever use it again? How many chances would he get? Right now, looking at it just… Hurt.
He sighed, hand loose over his mouse, as he opened the app, looking fondly over the last messages you shared. That stupid old english bit that led him to yet another forgotten song, yet another lonely night, yet another broken heart.
Quickly, he started undoing it. Line by line, removing the stickers, deleting all the messages, he hesitated before clearing all restrictions. He hesitated. He could just move the whole thing to the trashcan and never think of it, but no, he’s thorough, he needed to know this was over.
/Unrestrict All
As soon as he hit enter, his app flooded with messages, his chat scrolling down quickly to keep up with the endless wall of messages left on the chat.
Did they know he couldn’t read it? Obviously, they were smart enough for that, weren’t they. Then why?
The messages finally stopped coming in, he scrolled to the top.
Loser: Micah?
Loser: Micah, I’m sorry! I was trying to joke too…
Oh… That made sense, didn’t it. He overreacted, didn’t he.
Loser: did I sound too serious?? I’m sorry!
Loser: God, I’m sorry. Come back?
Loser: … please.
Loser: please.
He scrolled down, heart aching even more than it did during that call. He noticed the next messages were from a different date.
Loser: Micah, I know you can’t read this, yeah, um. Yeah. But also, if there's a small chance you someday do, like my brain is telling me there is
Loser: I want you to know that I really do like you. I do. It’s overwhelming, even. I wish you had stayed, let me… explain.
Loser: I wish you hadn’t left so quickly… I… Wanted to know more about you.
He took a moment, breathing deeply, but he couldn’t look away, he had done this to himself, really, he should manage the pain.
Loser: You haven’t been online in a while… I wonder what you’re doing out there.
Loser: I’m cringing at expressing my emotions like this, knowing you probably won’t ever know, but you’re so smart, and you never failed to make me smile… You’re the best person I’ve met, really, so kind even though you put up that annoying smirk. And yeah, I meant what I said when I called you attractive, but you’re so much more than that.
Loser: I never really had many friends. It hurts to lose another one… And I wish we could’ve been more than that, really. If only I had stopped tip-toeing around that fact and just told you like the grown adult I am, maybe we wouldn’t be in this mess.
Loser: or, I wouldn’t be in this mess, huh. I don’t know how you’re doing. You could be better off without me for all I know.
He wasn’t.
Loser: but I’m not. I’m not better off without you. I want you back. Just to see that stupid smirk again, hell. never thought id say something like this but, fuck i think i became too attached.
Loser: I’m crying while writing this, am I evenreally an adult now? i feel like a kid,will you come back
Loser: will you ever come back
He scrolled down, seeing all the messages pass by, sprinkled with spelling errors and dates and updates on their life, he wishes he could’ve come back earlier. When was the last message?
What felt like endless scrolling later, he was back to the end of the chat, he looked at the date, a little hope growing in his chest.
Two weeks ago.
Loser: I wish I could move on from you. If only falling out of love was as easy as falling in.
He leaned back to his chair, tears starting to grow in his eyes. He overreacted, he jumped to conclusions because of how hurt he was, he ignored any chance they had of explaining themselves, and now they were trying to move on. Without him. He was too late.
He sighed, breath shaky, as he went back to his desktop. He should delete it after all, what hope was there left of making this right? How many chances would he get?
He left his chair, walking himself to the bathroom to splash some water across his red cheeks and eyes.
In the distance, he heard a ding.
He ran back to his computer, ignoring the fact his face was still dripping with a mixture of water and tears, not even bothering to sit down as he reopened the server.
Loser: Micah??
Loser: oh my god you’re online. you’re seeing my messages. Micah im so sorry i didn’t mean anythign i said pplease!
His mouse quickly moved to their profile picture, clicking the video call button as fast as he possibly could. The call connected itself immediately, and another crying face met his.
“Micah!”
“I’m sorry!” He said, breath shallow in his lungs, he was still standing up, leaning over his desk, eyes to his screen. “I’m so sorry- I didn’t let you explain, and I’m so sorry I ghosted you, and I’m so sorry I put you in this situation- I didn’t know, and-”
“Shut up Micah- I love you!” They screamed at their webcam, lips quivering. “I love you, and I’ve not stopped loving you. Let me say that if you’re not going to let me say anything else, I love you and I missed you and I forgive you for everything. Just… forgive me too, okay?”
He wiped his eyes dry with one of his hands, somewhat covering his face, a shaky breath definitely caught on the microphone.
“I love you too. I’m sorry I was stupid-”
“Don’t be silly, Micah… I was stupid to not explain myself immediately. I should’ve done more-”
“I acted out, angel…” The word hurt on his lips. “I acted like a child, please give me another try at this - I want you back.”
“You have another try now, Micah… I won’t be away again.”
“Then… Then, I love you. And I promise I’m not running away this time.”
How many chances would he get?