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English
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Published:
2022-05-07
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1/1
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Cactus Head is a Weird Tentacle Thing and Tex is Not, NOT Into That

Summary:

Tex Hex/Cactus Head tentacle porn with just a little taste of one-sided Tex/Bravestarr.

Work Text:

Tex sat alone in the Hexagon. And he was likely going to be alone here for a while. He had managed to escape capture after Marshal Bravestarr had put a stop to his latest attempt to rob Fort Kerium, but his crew hadn’t been so lucky. Sandstorm, Vipra, Scuzz and Cactus Head were probably sitting in a jail cell right now, hopefully reflecting on how not to screw up next time. Thunderstick and his Dingo buddies had been gone all week, off doing their own thing. Tex was going to want to have a new plan ready by the time they got back, and he would send someone out for a jailbreak eventually, but for now he wasn’t in the mood.

Bravestarr and those damn do-gooders of Fort Kerium had foiled his schemes once again and he wasn’t done sulking. Thanks to his magic powers, Tex Hex was almost always able to avoid the indignity of spending time in the town’s jail. Still…

Tex leaned back in his chair. He had salvaged it from the wreck of his ship after he crashed into the Hexagon, and it was one of the few pieces of furniture that was still in decent condition in the base. Tex nestled himself into the plush vinyl cushions and closed his eyes.

Still, what if… What if he let Bravestarr capture him? Just for fun. He could easily escape later. All he would have to do was convince Bravestarr that he had lost his powers. Bravestarr could cuff him, or tie him up and manhandle him into a cell. Tex wiggled deeper into the chair, grinning at the mental image. Yes… then Tex would look up at Bravestarr’s handsome face. “Please Marshal, I’ll be so lonely in this cell. Won’t you stay with me for a while? I’m at your mercy,” he would say. Then Bravestarr, his toned muscles glistening in the light of the moons would say… Something about it being wrong to take advantage of someone in his custody probably.

Tex growled, scrunching his eyes shut tighter and gripping the arms of his chair. “Damn marshal won’t even let me get away with my fantasy plots,” he muttered sourly. “Fine, we’ll do it your way.”

A change of scene: Bravestarr and he are fighting, tooth and claw. Bravestarr’s shirt is artfully torn to reveal his toned muscles glistening in the light of the moons, shining bright overhead. Their fight pits Bravestarr’s superhuman strength against Tex’s supernatural powers. They fight, clawing at one another, rolling around on the ground, each trying to get control over the other. They’re evenly matched but finally, worn out from their long battle, Bravestarr pushes Tex down and pins him to the ground with his legs. He raises a fist to end his enemy but hesitates.

“Why are we fighting? Why are we really fighting?” Bravestarr looks down at him, his thick dark hair messy, his skin dappled with beads of sweat. His eyes are tired but there is a fire in them.

“Because you chose the law, ” Tex wheezes under the weight of the marshal on his chest, “and I chose EVIL!”

“Damn the law!” Bravestarr throws his hands up dramatically. “I want to be free. Free to make love under the stars to whomever I please.” He looks down at Tex. “Don’t you?”

“Yes,” Tex moans as Bravestarr leans in close to touch his lips to Tex’s. Tex pulls him into a deeper kiss, running his hands through that long, dark hair. The marshal pulls away to catch his breath and rips away what was left of his shirt.

In his chair in the Hexagon Tex Hex bit his lip. With one hand gripping the arm of the chair, the other ran down over the swell in his pants. He sat up to fiddle with his belt buckle.

Something clattered and Tex caught movement at the corner of his eye. He stuffed himself back into his pants at light speed and froze.

“Who goes there? Show yourself!” Tex couldn’t see anything in the room with him, only mechanical debris and a cactus.

Hang on. He knew that cactus.

The cactus shifted, revealing a pair of yellow eyes below. “Tex, you’re back.”

“Uh, yep. Yes I am. I am back here.” Tex crossed one leg over the other in an attempt to cover the bulge poking through his undone pants. He cleared his throat. “And so are you. I thought you got captured? How long have you been here?”

“I got away.” Cactus Head scuttled closer, rubbing his eyes. “I came straight back here to wait for the others but I guess I fell asleep.”

Tex took off his hat under the guise of fixing his hair and set it strategically on his lap. “Aw, you do look tuckered out. You should definitely go to your room and get a proper sleep. Right now.”

Cactus Head blinked sleepily but there was a mischief in his eyes. “Oh, I’m awake now.” He scuttled up close to Tex’s chair. From his spider-like mechanical legs to his permanent wide smile and big yellow eyes, there was nothing that wasn’t unsettling about Cactus Head. And knowing what was under the robotic shell, well that was the stuff of nightmares.

Tex clasped his hands firmly over his hat.

“So you were thinking about Bravestarr, weren’t you?”

Tex’s eyes flew wide in horror. Had he been muttering out loud?

“You mean, thinking about how to get revenge?” Tex asked, uncertainly. He might be able to dig himself out of this yet…

Cactus Head chuckled. “I don’t blame you. He’s pretty, for a human.”

“Pretty?”

“Yeah, pretty. Square jaw, round lips, bright eyes, sexy voice…”

“Great ass,” added Hex before slapping his hand over his mouth.

Cactus Head giggled. “Yeah, and a great ass!”

Tex chuckled, embarrassed, his violet skin flushing pink. Cactus Head’s gaze was on him unwaveringly. He placed a tiny, three-fingered mechanical hand on Tex’s knee. Tex looked down at it, confused.

“Don’t stop because of me. You know, you’re not so bad for a human yourself.”

Tex felt the universe implode and flip inside out. Did this weird little creature want to… watch him jack off???

The steel fingers dug into his pant leg. “I could watch, or… I could help.”

The universe flipped inside out the other way and Tex started to question each and every life decision that had led him here. This creepy little cactus wanted to jack him off.

It took Tex a moment to wrap his head around this revelation. In which time, Cactus Head had gently shifted Tex’s leg and the Hat of Concealment. Tex swallowed nervously. He wasn’t sure he wanted that horror of teeth and tentacles anywhere near his tender bits. But he did always say he would try anything once and his curiosity was starting to get the better of him.

“Just to be sure… You… want to fuck? Is that what we’re getting at here?”

Cactus Head wiggled on his spidery legs. “Yeah, let’s do it!”

Tex cast a furtive glance around the room just to make sure no one else was hiding in the corners. There wasn’t. He slowly uncrossed his legs. This is going to be the weirdest sex I’ve ever had or will likely ever have… Well damn, if you think about it like that, I’d be a fool to turn this down. He placed his hat back on his head.

Cactus Head tugged at Tex’s pants. Tex kicked off his boots and then his pants, settling back into his chair naked from the waist down. The little robotic hands ran up and down his thighs, their cool metal slowly warming to the temperature of his own skin. Then Cactus Head’s mechanical skin went rigid, arms and legs locking into place. His yellow eyes sucked back into his head and his mouth pulled out of his metal jaw, leaving a slimy, gaping hole. The creature that piloted the cybernetic body squeezed out the top with a wet squelch. The yellow eyes reappeared, bulbous and round, followed by a cascade of tentacles, writhing and flopping onto his exo-skeleton.

Somehow Tex’s erection survived all that. He watched with a sort of fascinated horror.

Cactus Head, his pink tentacled body exposed, crawled up onto Tex’s lap. Slippery tentacles coiled around his legs and cock. Tex gasped as they curled and swirled all over him. He started to lean into Cactus Head’s grasp, it was like the best blow job he’d ever had. Certainly the most… dynamic. Then Cactus Head opened his mouth. In the center of all the tentacles was Cactus Head’s mouth, with a thick pink tongue and rows and rows of pointy little teeth.

“B-be careful with the teeth…” Tex winced.

The mouth stretched into a smile. “Okay. No teeth.” The squid creature lifted himself up on his tentacles and lowered his mouth over Tex’s dick. Tex let out a gasp of surprise and pleasure as he was surrounded by soft, warm flesh. Cactus Head squished his body down into Tex’s lap then bounced back and squished down again. The cactus bobbed up and down on his lap. It was the oddest sight, but it sure did feel good.

Tilt your hips back for me.

Cactus Head’s mouth was occupied but Tex could hear his voice echo in the back of his mind. Since when could he do that?

Go on. Let me get my ⏇⏂⏋⏘⏅⍾⍜ on your ass.

Tex didn’t catch all of it that time, or maybe the cactus symbiote was telling him something he couldn’t directly translate. Either way, Tex went ahead and did as he was told.

One of Cactus Head’s slimy tentacles reached down and slipped into him. I think I saw a movie about this once, Tex thought deliriously. A second tentacle followed, then a third.

Tex let out a staggering moan, overcome by so many sensations.

He could hear the voice in the back of his mind, fainter this time. It was speaking a strange language, but by the quick, excited tone he could hazard a guess.

“You - hnnnhh - enjoying yourself there little guy?” Tex panted.

Mmm-hmmm, came the voice in his head. Cactus Head looked up at him with a smile in his eyes. He tilted his head back, revealing more of the slimy pink skin under his cactus. Another slimy protrusion caught Tex’s eye. It poked out from the side of the squid’s head, just below the rim of the cactus.

“Uh, is that what I think it is?”

The pencil-sized tendril wiggled.

“Oh gods it moves.

A chuckle echoed in Tex’s mind. It is, it is. I’ve got a rod and I’ve got a hole. I’m sure you know what to do with them.

Sure enough, where the tendril was on the right of the symbiote’s head was a puckered divot on the left. Tex took off his gloves and uncertainly touched Cactus Head’s face. He ran a finger around the divot. A shiver ran through Cactus Head’s body and Tex could very much feel it. Tex wiggled his middle finger into the hole but Cactus Head recoiled.

Ouch! Your nails are sharp.

“Oh, sorry.” Tex pulled back his hand. Instead he - very carefully - grabbed hold of the cactus portion of his partner. He pulled it back so he could reach him with his mouth. This close to Cactus Head, Tex could clearly smell him: a musky mix of spoilt milk and fresh fish. Oh well, he’d put his mouth on worse. He licked the slimy hole and it trembled invitingly. A moan echoed in Tex’s mind and the back of Cactus Head’s throat as Tex pushed his tongue into the opening. After sucking and licking Cactus Head until the symbiote was shaking, Tex switched to the tendril. It squirmed around in his mouth. He pushed it to the top of his mouth with his tongue so he could get some traction on it.

Cactus Head bounced faster, his tentacles coiling wildly over and inside Tex’s body. The gibberish was back in Tex’s head, loud and excited.

“Uuuuhhhn” the squid moaned around Tex’s dick and he felt his mouth fill with bitter liquid.

Tex spluttered and the milky fluid dripped out of his mouth. Cactus Head blinked up at him lazily, his sides expanding and contracting with his heavy breaths. Tex wiped his mouth on his sleeve, waiting for his partner to catch his breath.

He was so damn close, he just needed a little push. And Cactus Head gave it to him, clamping his mouth around Tex’s dick while thrusting and twisting his tentacles into him. Tex rocked into the thrusts, throwing his head back to let out a stream of high-pitched feral noises.

Cactus Head extracted himself from Tex’s lap, sitting on top of his exo-skeleton. He ran a tentacle over Tex’s knee.

“Not bad. For a human,” he mumbled drowsily.

“Heh, heh.” Tex flopped back into his chair. “Damn, I needed that.” He looked down at the mess of slime and spooge starting to cool on his lap. “I guess we should get cleaned up.”

Cactus Head schlorped himself back into his robotic body. “Yeah, I need to wash out my mouth. Do all humans taste like that or is it a magical undead thing?”

“It’s not that weird, is it?”

“It’s a little weird.”

~~~

 

Cactus Head floated in the bath, his tentacles spread like a starfish. He wiggled them, spinning in lazy circles. Tex watched him spin between his legs as he scrubbed up.

“How long have you been able to do that thing? Where your voice was in my mind?”

Cactus Head opened his eyes and paddled to the side of the tub to lift his mouth out of the water.

“Always have. I have to be touching your skin to do it though, so it’s only ever convenient in - heehee - some very specific situations.”

“Hmm” Tex clasped his hands together in the bathwater, trying to make a water gun. “You’re a peculiar fellow Cactus Head. I reckon I don’t know half as much as I should about you.” He succeeded in squirting a little plume of water through his hands.

Cactus Head chuckled mysteriously. “You should know I can do… this!” he dropped back into the water, coiling his tentacles into a tube and blasting Tex with bathwater.

Tex spat out water, his mouth curling into an evil grin. “That means war.