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The lights were bright and harsh against Clark Kent's (AKA, Superman) eyes, although he ignored it as he smiled and waved for the crowd of press and civilians. He stood next to Lex Luthor who was smiling and waving just as Clark was. Both tried to ignore the other for the few moments they would be allowed.
"Mr. Luthor! Mr. Superman!" Various press members were shoving at each other to get their questions answered. The civilians who were curious and came to satiate that curiosity stood behind them, trying to peer over the cameras and get a good look at the stage.
They had good reason to be curious. Two weeks ago, Luthor had accused Clark of stealing their child, a clone made of their shared DNA, and had gone very public. Of course, things had gone very poorly for Clark when he admitted that the next day, the kid had run away as Clark had accidentally scared him off. The public had a fit over it, and Luthor had stared at Clark with obvious disbelief.
He still remembered how the next day, he'd flown outside of the window to LexCorp headquarters and floated outside Luthor's office until he opened the window and allowed Clark to talk to him, although there was a small gaggle of reporters in the room. Clark's wife, Lois, among them.
"I have good news, and I have bad news." Clark had said, rubbing the back of his neck for the show of it because he knew that Lex already knew of the situation, but he had to make it look like he and Lex were just getting around to talking about it.
"What's the good news." Lex asked, raising his non-existent eyebrow. "Good news, I found our... kid." Clark felt like choking on the word. He'd always prided himself on his loyalty, especially to his wife, but now it felt as though he was forced to cheat on her. "He's safe and sound. Not a hair on his head was harmed."
"What's the bad news?" Lex's voice turned a little dangerous, eyes narrowed. "Uh... Batman found him first." He shrunk away from the window in case Lex decided to do something. Fortunately, Lex just blinked at him. "Batman. The vigilante from Gotham that the Justice League is friends with and is considered a founding member of said League even though he never formally joined?" He deadpanned. Clark nodded his head.
"And he said that he was keeping our... kid until the two of us discuss this... situation like adults." Clark winced as the press that was still in the room started whispering and sent accusing looks in Clark's direction. "And you're just going to let the Batman keep him?" Lex snapped. It was Clark's turn to gap at Lex.
"You want to fight Batman?!" Clark squeaked, letting some of his hidden fears of his friend to the forefront of his mind to help sell the act. "Yes. Do you have a problem with that?" Lex leveled Clark with a dangerous look. "Yes! You don't fight Batman. Not only is our kid the safest with him, but Batman isn't someone you fight once without lasting consequences! You try to get our kid back now and Batman will probably gut you, get back at you for revenge, and then never let either of us see him again unless it's through a screen! There's a reason even Wonder Woman doesn't try to take on Bats, and she's the only one of us who could probably take him down!" Clark shuddered.
Lex and the press members just gaped at him. "Is Batman really that bad?" Lois asked from the crowd, shaking Clark out of his stupor. "Oh, no. He's mostly just grumpy. But he does tend to be really petty and doesn't let people get away with much around him." Clark smiled. "There are lots of reasons we all trust him with our lives."
"And you trust him with our child?" Lex barked. Clark glared right back at Lex. "Yes." He ground out. "Besides, Bat's won't take another Robin. Told me so himself and he's kept his word." He fluffed up quite proudly. Sure, Batman had adopted a kid and was the current temporary guardian of another in his civilian life, but he wouldn't put another child in danger after his previous one was killed.
The press obviously wanted more answers, even when Lex had nodded and agreed to talk with Clark that night, but they would get those answers when he and Lex decided to give them.
"Alright, calm down. We're here to answer all your questions." Luthor said placatingly as he and Clark took to the center of the stage. The crowd quieted and they waited for the brief moment it took for Clark and Luthor to take a deep breath and compose themselves.
"Two weeks ago, Superman revealed that, after he saved one of my building and the employees inside, I had been experimenting with cloning, including a cloning process that involved Kryptonian DNA. This experiment resulted in a clone made of my DNA and Superman's DNA. Our son, if you will.
As of today, he is eighteen days old, having spent nine months in an accelerated growth pod. He is physically 15 years old. In the two weeks he has been out of his pod, Batman, a vigilante from Gotham, took... less than legal custody of him until Superman and I could find a middle ground and talk like adults." Luthor shrugged, tossing the crowd a charming smile, and then gave Clark a pointed look.
Clark awkwardly cleared his throat. "Lex Luthor and I decided that we'd have shared guardianship over him. Every two weeks, he'll move between our residences. Obviously, if there needs to be a schedule change, there will be changes. Hopefully, when this press conference is over and the last of the paperwork is done and filed, Batman will hopefully give him back."
"Who said you'd have to wait?" Came the voice of a teenager, and said teenager dropped from the top of the stage. It was the clone, dressed in an outfit similar to Clark's Superman, but without the cape and a black leather jacket that had spikes, round shades, and ruffled black hair. "Hi!" He smirked. "And if you're wondering, my name's Conner, although you two can put anything down for my legal name."
The newly named Conner then strutted off the stage with as much confidence as someone wearing a punk leather jacket, a hip holster, and combat boots could. Both Luthor and Clark watched him go.
"You can have the first two weeks." Luthor said flatly, trailing after him. Clark just stared, then sighed, taking off into the night.
Conner had been staying the past two weeks with Batman, Batgirl, Black Bat, Nightwing, Agent A, and Robin. In the Batcave most of the time, although Robin and Batgirl snuck him out so they could go to an arcade at 11 o'clock at night. The look the poor employees face's at Conner being tugged around by two demon-like teenagers had been priceless.
He had also been let out to run around a small swamp that was just outside of Gotham, Robin and Batman telling him tales of zombies, resurrection, and Soloman Grundy. Around day two of his stay, Robin and he had figured out a name for him; Conner. He liked it and had snuggled up to his newfound best friend, squealing with joy. He had a name! He had a name!
Conner had learned lots of things about the Bats, as they were called, while he stayed with them.
One, they had secret identities.
"It's nothing against you. We just like our privacy and we can't get any if everyone knows who we are. Besides, just because Robin gave you permission to sleep in the roost, doesn't mean you get access to all our secrets." Batgirl snarked, a smirk playing on her lips. Conner pursed his own, trying to keep his forming fists to himself. "Come on. It's not that bad!" She giggled.
"Besides, I don't think you really want to know. You wouldn't like us then." Conner blinked as she dance away.
Two, everything in the Batcave, usually had the word 'bat' in front of it.
"So, this computer has basically everything on it?" Kr asked, tilting his head like a puppy. "Pretty much." Batgirl shrugged. "And with this computer, we'll help you find a name." Robin declared, pulling up a website with various names on it. "Batcomputer." Nightwing jumped in. Robin and Batgirl groaned.
"What?" Kr tilted his head the other way. "It's the batcomputer." Nightwing said, looking proud of himself for some reason. "Why? Just why?" Batgirl grumbled. "I don't..." Kr held his head with some confusion. "When Nightwing was a kid, he took the 'bat' theme way too seriously, and now everything has the word 'bat' in front of it." Batgirl huffed.
"Oh." Kr blinked. "Exactly. Batcomputer. Batchair. Batfloor. Batstairs." Nightwing pointed to various objects around the room. "Batcup." He picked up a mug off the computer's controls. "Is there a difference between bat-things and regular things?" Kr asked. "Nope. Just the word bat, really." Batgirl shrugged.
"Then why...?" Kr scrubbed his eyes. This made no sense. "Basically, it's a regular object, but with the word 'bat' in front of it so that way people know it belongs to the bats, which is us." Robin explained, gesturing to himself, Batgirl, and Nightwing.
"Anyways, let's find you a name."
Third, Robin was actually 14, not 11 like Conner had originally thought.
"But your so small!" Conner exclaimed, poking one of Robin's thin cheeks. Robin growled at him, hand batting Conner's away. "So? The... previous Robin was my size." Robin looked down at the ground, and hadn't it been for Conner's superhearing, he wouldn't have heard the last part. "There's other Robins?" Conner tilted his head, then pushed his head back. He was not a dog!
Robin's nose wrinkled up. "Uh... yeah." He muttered, shifting uncomfortably. "He, uh, he's not around anymore." He sounded sad and Conner didn't like that. He didn't like it when Robin sounded sad, so Conner dragged Robin into his lap.
Robin whispered out a sad stream of clicking sound, shivering a little. "Bullshit!" Came a harsh voice. Conner whirled around to see Batgirl standing there. She declared something with loud screeches and squawks, walking up to them. Robin snorted. "You're a horrible Robin." He groused as Conner stood up so Batgirl wouldn't flop into his lap. "I know. Batman won't let me take it up again, so you're stuck with being the best Robin he's ever had!" She snapped.
Robin whimpered, looking away. "I'll get it through your thick skull one day!" Batgirl declared. Conner shifted uncomfortably and cleared his throat. "You know... she's bigger than you." He muttered.
Batgirl cracked a bright smile and Robin groaned. "Damn right I am!" She cackled. "No, please. Why did you do this to me?" Robin wailed as Batgirl laughed loudly.
And fourth, Batman wasn't actually their Dad.
"Whaaaa??" Conner looked gobsmacked as Black Bat purred against his side and Robin shifted uncomfortably while Batgirl and Nightwing looked nonchalant about this entire conversation. "You're not related!?" He demanded. Robin shook his head and Nightwing shrugged. "Not by blood." He explained.
Conner paused, looking around the cave. "What? So did Batman just grab you off the streets?" He demanded. The four of them paused, even Black Bat stopped purring (and okay, so Conner had gotten over most of his fear for her and Batman, although they were still terrifying).
"We're not talking about that." Robin finally said. "Nope. Not at all. Not thinking about the accuracy of that statement." Nightwing nodded along. "Or how we all say that's what happened in a nutshell and how we actively disobey him to go back out on said streets so he can nab us again." Batgirl chuckled.
Black Bat snorted and seemed to roll her eyes although Conner couldn't see them.
"Is he going to...?" Conner looked at them for reassurance. "Nah. It would compromise our secret identities and you should probably stick around Superman just so you learn to control your powers better. That, and Lex is beyond rich so you'll get access to a bunch of stuff that normal people couldn't afford." Batgirl shrugged. "Yeah, just use people for money, why don't you." Nightwing huffed.
"Doesn't she already do that?" Robin asked with a raised eyebrow. They were all quiet then.
"Anyways, a lot of us already have parents. But mine are dead." Nightwing rubbed the back of his neck. "The living one is a supervillain!" Batgirl chirped. Black Bat shrugged, resuming her purring against Conner's side. "Uh, my Mom's dead, and my dad just woke up from a coma a few months ago. I'm living here until he finishes his PT." Robin rubbed his arm. "PT?" Conner had to mentally stop himself from tilting his head again.
"Physical Therapy. It's when something bad happens to your body, so you have to go to therapy, except instead of going for your emotions, it's to make your body feel better." Batgirl explained.
But now he was sitting in the back of a limousine that belonged to Lex Luthor, aka, one of his dads. Batman had dropped him off at the top of the metal supports and let Conner know that if he didn't feel comfortable with anything that was going to happen, his cave door was open.
Conner had said he was ready, dropped down when it seemed theatrically appropriate, and strutted like Batgirl off the stage before he lost his nerve. He then got into Lex's car and sat down, waiting for Lex to come in so he could see where he would be staying.
Lex did come in after a few moments of waiting and sat down next to Conner. Once the door was closed the limo began to move.
"So, your chosen name is Conner?" Lex asked and Conner smirked at him. "Yep. Not everyone can name themselves." He fluffed up proudly. Lex hummed. "Well, would you like to know you're legal name for paperwork purposes?" He asked, a somewhat kind smile on his face although it didn't reach his eyes.
"Sure." Conner shrugged. "It's Kon-El-Luthor. Superman and I couldn't decide which of us would have the honor of giving you our last names, so that's what we came up with." Lex sounded a little bitter and Conner snorted with amusement.
"Kon-El-Luthor," Conner said, rolling the words over his tongue. "Not the worst name." He landed on. "I'm glad you don't despise it. Now, when we get back home, I don't want any property damage until Superman shows up." Lex groused. "Why until Clark show's up?" Conner raised an eyebrow. If Lex was surprised that Conner knew Superman's civilian name, he didn't show it. "Because then I can blame it on him." He responded and Conner chuckled under his breath.
This was going to be more fun than a barrel of monkeys.
Clark flew over to the top of the daily planet, one of the shorter buildings in Metropolis, to meet up with the rest of the Justice League that had decided to come along. He knew Barry Allen (AKA, Flash number 1) had been in the crowd while Oliver Queen (Green Arrow), Diana (Wonder Woman), Hal Jordan (one of the Green Lanterns), and Dinah Lance (Black Canary) looked on from the rooftops to try and spot Batman in case the Dark Knight decided to pay a visit.
Apparently, he had, and no one had noticed him smuggle in Conner (and okay, that was a little weird mentally) on top of that.
Silently, Clark landed on the top of a roof just as Oliver and Dinah were dropped onto it thanks to Hal. Diana and Barry were already there, waiting a bit on the inpatient side.
"So, Conner?" Barry asked. "Yep." Clark sighed. "How is he?" Dinah asked. "He's... alright. I think. I'm meeting him and Lex back at the penthouse after this." Clark shrugged. "I hope he's alright. Batman doesn't seem that great with children." Diana muttered. "Yeah. Poor kid was probably scared the entire time." Hal nodded along.
"Eh, I'm not so sure. Robin and Batgirl like him well enough and Black Bat loves him." Oliver shrugged, only to be hit upside the head by Dinah.
"Who?" Barry asked just as Hal asked; "What?"
Oliver blinked then flushed. "Oh, right. Nevermind. I didn't say anything." He shrugged, backing up with his hands up. "Wait... did you say, 'Robin' and 'Batgirl'?" Clark said slowly. "Uhhhh... no?" Oliver squeaked. Dinah shook her head. "Hold on, Black Bat? Who names themselves 'Black Bat'? A Batman fangirl?" Hal snorted.
"Listen, it's not important. We didn't manage to catch Batman smuggling the kid in, so what does it matter?" Oliver chuckled nervously. "Does this mean you know Batman's private life?" Barry asked. "Uhhh... maybe?" Oliver shrugged. Dinah smacked her forehead. "We're talking about this later." Clark snapped at Oliver, glaring just beside his head before flying off.
"What was up with that?" Hal asked. "Someone knows something and isn't sharing with the class." Diana crossed her arms and gave Oliver a no-nonsense look. Oliver nervously laughed. "And I'm sure we'll all be having a grand time having it explained to us." Barry clipped.
"And with that, I think I'll take my leave." Oliver turned and promptly jumped off the building while Dinah shook her head.
All eyes turned to her. "I'm not saying anything. Ollie and Bat's have a weird... pact... thing," Dinah rolled her hand around in a circle, "and I'm not going to be the one to ruin that. So, save your questions for the guy with the blond goatee." She shrugged, returning her co-worker's curious stares with her own flat one.
They sighed in defeat. "Alright, you win."
Clark opened up a window and floated into the living room of the LexCorp penthouse that Lex had claimed as his own. Lex looked up from where he was sitting at the kitchen island. Around two rooms over, Clark could hear Conner exploring and probably making a mess. Then again, he was sure that Lex could hear him too, seeing as Conner wasn't exactly being quiet.
"He's adjusting quite well." Lex said after a few seconds of him and Clark awkwardly making eye contact. "I can hear that." Clark nodded.
"YOU HAVE A LIZARD!?!" Conner squealed and Clark had to share the startled look with Lex. "You still have a lizard?" Clark asked. "I thought it died."
Lex sighed. "No." He got up and Clark followed him to what was the foyer of the penthouse where Conner was floating with his hands pressed against the glass of a massive enclosure, looking at a truly massive (and rather overweight) green iguana that was glaring at the person who disturbed its rest.
"That is Ignitus. He's an iguana." Lex said simply. "Can I hold him?" Conner turned and smiled with massive, excited puppy eyes that reminded Clark that the kid was actually only a handful of weeks old, not the teenager he looked like. "I promise I won't hurt 'im!" He bounced slightly, then seemingly remembered that bouncing was a little weird, and held still with a small flush to his cheeks.
Lex didn't say anything, but opened the enclosure and picked up Ingitus, handing him over to a very excited Conner. "Cool." Conner whispered as he held the iguana to his chest. "He used to live in my office, but after the fifth time he was caught destroying a machine, I had him moved here." Lex explained to both Kryptonians. "I had been wondering what happened to him." Clark mussed as a small smile twitched onto his face as he watched Conner cuddle the grumpy reptile.
"Yes, as I remember, he and Krypto didn't like one another." Lex glared at Clark. "Oh, right. I remember Nightwing said something about Krypto. He's your dog, right?" Conner looked away from Ignitus to look at Clark. "Yeah. I think I can bring him by some time or you can meet him when you stay with me." Clark smiled, a bit of warmth beginning to glow in his chest.
Conner beamed at him and returned to coddling Ignitus.
Clark then shared a look with Lex, and he had a feeling that Lex was in a bit over his head. "So, Conner, how are you settling in?" Clark asked after he and Lex were done sharing a look of 'aww, that's adorable' and 'oh shit, we actually have a kid'.
Conner shrugged. "I think I'll be okay. My room's pretty nice." He smiled. "And besides, now I have a friend here." He proudly showed off Ignitus to Clark and Lex. "Right." Lex said.
"Oh, but I do have one question." Conner cut off Lex before could continue. "And that would be?" Lex sighed. "What do I call you guys? 'Cause calling you both 'Dad' is gonna get confusing really quickly." Conner just barely tilted his head before it righted. "Do I call one of you Dad and the other Father, but that sounds really bad. Is one of you Pops? Like a pop-rock candy? Or Pappy? Pa?" He paused and gave Lex and Clark an odd look, probably because of how startled the two adults looked.
"You two didn't think this through, did you?" Conner smirked. "No. No, someone did not." Clark glared at Lex, who glared right back.
Conner smirked down at Ignitus, who gave him a puzzled look in return. He was right, this was going to be fun.
Jack Drake muted the TV and looked over to his son, Tim Drake. "So, a superboy?" He said, not really sure what to say to his son. Tim nodded, putting his hand on his father's. "Do you think he's gonna call both Superman and Luthor Dad, or is he gonna come up with other names?" He asked. Jack chuckled. "I'm sure they'll figure it out, son." He smiled, head resting back onto his pillows, and yawned.
"Well, you'd think that after being asleep for a year, I wouldn't be tired." He chuckled. Tim nodded and yawned as well. "I don't have that excuse." The fourteen-year-old rubbed his eyes. "Someone's tired." Jack smiled softly. "Why don't you and Mr. Wayne go back to the hotel and get some sleep." He raised a hand and rubbed his son's cheek, and the boy leaned into the touch.
"Usually it's you who's leaving." Tim whispered sleepily, half awake. Jack's breath hitched as his son slowly started to fall asleep. Guilt once again hitting him like a dump truck.
He hadn't known that the various nurses and nannies he and his wife had hired had simply taken the money they were paid and dropped off food once or twice a week while their son had functionally been abandoned. Hadn't known Tim had eventually found Bruce Wayne, a man who had recently lost a child and had managed to wiggle his way into the older's bleeding heart.
Then he and his wife had taken that damned trip down to the Mediterranean and left with his wife dead and himself in a coma, only to awaken roughly a year later in Metropolis and learn that his son had gone through a horrible year known as 'Year Zero' where Gotham had been cut off from the rest of the world and been ruled by various members of Gotham's rogue's gallery. But now he was awake, and he was going to be the best-damned father he could manage.
He swore it, even as Bruce Wayne entered the room and picked Tim up, promising to come by in the morning so both Drakes could see each other again. Cass, a little girl Bruce had recently adopted, on his heels.
Jack then turned back to the TV which was still on a news channel that was raving about Kon 'Conner' El-Luthor. He internally chuckled at how the last name sounded like it was Spanish, then wished the best on the new 'family' and prayed that Superman and Lex Luthor could give Conner the life the kid deserved.
To not fuck up their chance as Jack had.
Bruce watched the window silently as Oliver opened it and slipped in in his Green Arrow attire.
"To what do I owe this visit?" Bruce said quietly as Oliver panted. "Uh, I might've let slip that Batgirl and Robin are a thing." Oliver grunted, leaning over. "Whoo, Metropolis is not a good city for grappling. Nothing to grab onto, buildings too smooth. Supey should be thanking whatever Kryptonian god he's always saying that he can fly." He leaned backward, back popping.
Bruce hummed. "So, I assume you or I will be questioned soon." He grunted, ice blue eyes looking back out the window. "Yeah, pretty much. Superman wasn't too happy about it... for whatever reason. Doesn't he know about your kids?" Oliver walked over. Bruce nodded. "He does. Maybe he just didn't put two and two together." He grunted. "Really? So much for being an investigative reporter." Oliver chuckled.
"Clark sees what he want's to see, if he wants to see what is right in front of him, he will. He didn't want to think that I'd taken on more child vigilantes." Bruce mumbled. Oliver snorted. "Great. Not that problem again. He's gonna get some bad luck one of these days thanks to that mindset." He chuckled. "Speaking of kids, have you heard from Roy?"
Bruce glanced over at Oliver, then sighed. "Last I heard, he's over in Bialya, helping get refugees out of the country." He muttered. "Met up with Starfire a little while ago." Oliver sighed with relief. "I will never understand how you got a little army of protégés that you get along with most of the time, yet I have one and fuck it up in the worst way possible." He grumbled.
Bruce snorted. "You haven't seen how bad me and Dick have gotten." He grumbled. "Yeah, but at least the two of you are still on speaking terms now. I try and call Roy and I don't even get a text back." Oliver groused. "How do you do it?"
Bruce was quiet, looking over to the bedroom where there was no doubt a child or two snuggled under blankets in mock roost (that Oliver was still not allowed in).
"Dumb luck."