Archive of Our Own

Cole’s leg bounced idly as he stared down at the blinking cursor on his phone screen, his hands shaking slightly. It had been a couple weeks since he had seen the little pest more formally known as Cashew, and he was beginning to get… antsy . 

Which he absolutely despised . He never got anxious. He was always cool, level headed- at least when it came to matters not involving Marshmallow. He could admit that at times like those he could get a bit… feral . Like the beast that still lurked inside of him- and outside in some ways- was ever present and ready to assist him when he needed it. 

Oh how he missed the feeling of being full panther. His senses enhanced and strength increased- and of course the great hunger that he'd always felt. The intoxicating feeling of all of the blood rushing through his body like red hot adrenaline. It was an entirely different kind of ecstacy. It was like he could do whatever he wanted- take whatever he wanted- and no one could dare stop him. 

Well, that wasn't entirely true. Marshmallow could have, and did, stop him several times. But that was no fault of Cole's ability to maintain control- no, that was the power of true love . He would do anything if it meant keeping them happy. He would never feel for anyone the way he did for his Marshmallow.

So why was he staring down at his phone, mindlessly chewing on his thumbnail as his screen read an unsent message of, ' are we going to that bookstore some time soon? my schedule won't be free forever, little squirrel. '

This of course was a lie- Cole was always free. But he didn't need the little pest thinking he was desperate to hang out with him. Because he wasn't, of course. But this message was also to serve as making sure the fool hadn't fallen into a salty noodle induced coma, thereby causing his Marshmallow to be troubled. 

Cole's phone buzzed in his hand, jolting him out of his thoughts, his panther ears perking up as he peered at his screen, realizing he had accidentally hit send… and had gotten a speedy reply. 

Little Pest: Oh yeah, sorry about that! I had a paper I had to write this past week and hadn't really left my dorm much heheh. 

Little Pest: I actually haven't seen Marshmallow in a while either, so I had been planning on asking both of you if maybe you wanted to come to the bookstore to hang out together? Like maybe tomorrow around noon?

Little Pest: But I totally get if you don't want to! I can understand if that might be troublesome for you…

Cole would never understand why the squirrel couldn't just say what he needed to say in one text, his large panther tail thumping against the armrest of the couch in annoyance. Wasn't the bookstore trip supposed to be just him and Cashew? But why did that matter? Shouldn't he be more focused on the fact that Cashew was essentially asking him to chaperone a date between him and Marshmallow? Well Cole was no third wheel- Cashew was. And maybe going could be beneficial in that he could keep an eye on the little emerald eyed menace and make sure he kept his perverted paws off of his love. Cole scoffed as he sent his reply. 

Cole: i suppose that could work. any chance I can get to keep you from being alone with my love, i'll take. 

Little Pest: Haha whatever you say. 

Little Pest: See you tomorrow at noon then!

Cole went to sit his phone down when he suddenly felt antsy again. He resumed bouncing his leg again without thinking.

Cole: by the way little squirrel, have you by any chance seen my tie? i think i left it there by mistake the night we had dinner. and have you even been trying to eat better? you better not have wasted my time.

Little Pest: Ooo someone's chatty today hehe

Little Pest: Well to answer all of your questions: Yes, and I washed it for you and can bring it tomorrow. Kind of, I've not eaten any more instant ramen for a while at least. But the only thing I can make otherwise is the alfredo, so that's still an issue…

Cole grumbled, preparing to respond when he received another message. 

Little Pest: And I wouldn't say it was a waste of time regardless. I had a nice time hanging out with you. And um, you know. Afterwards. 

Cole could feel his face heating up as he finished his own message.

Cole: yes well. it definitely wasn't the worst day of my life, i suppose. i did get a free lunch out of it.

Little Pest: And free dessert. ;)

Cole's mouth twitched upwards against his will. 

Cole: oh? is that what you're calling yourself now? 

Free Dessert: Only for certain people heheh

Free Dessert: Oh my god Cole lmao

Cole gazed down at his phone screen, a cheeky smirk decorating his lips. Then just as swiftly as it had appeared, it melted away. What the fuck was he doing? This was a whole new level of fraternizing with the enemy. He never joked around like this with anyone but Marshmallow. Did that mean-

No. Absolutely not. Why the fuck had his mind even wandered there? There's no way that… that he…

But then why was his heart racing? Why did he even feel compelled to text Cashew in the first place?

Because you missed him. 

Fuck. 

***

"Oh my god, I'm so excited. I've been wanting to hang out with you two together for a while now, but I never thought it would happen," Marshmallow chirped, nudging Cole and Cashew both in the ribs with their elbows. Cashew beamed down at them with that sickeningly sweet smile of his that made Cole's stomach soar into his throat. Cole had to force himself to roll his eyes as the unmistakable grin on his face would have given him away otherwise. 

"Anything for you, my love," he purred as the three headed into the corner bookstore, Cole moving admittedly a bit too quickly to be the one to open the door.

Marshmallow walked in first followed swiftly by Cashew who seemed a little too perky for Cole’s liking. Well maybe he'd just have to throw him off a bit. He couldn't have Cashew getting the upper hand on this "date" as the little menace had so audaciously called it. 

So just as Cashew passed in front of Cole- completely unaware, the fool- Cole wound up, and landed his hand with a swift *smack* right on the poor squirrel boy's ass cheek. Cashew let out an inhuman squeak at the sudden contact, flinging a hand to his mouth and awkwardly transitioning into an awkward cough. 

Cole without thinking let out a boisterous chuckle before realizing his mistake and coughing loudly into his own fist. Marshmallow turned to eye them both as they had finished entering the store, eyes narrowing with playful suspicion. 

"You uh… you two okay back there?" They asked, a sweet smirk spreading across their face. Cashew cleared his throat.

"Y- yep- yes, all good here," he managed somehow, fiddling with a piece of the hair that hung in his face. Cole simply remained silent for fear of saying something he'd regret, as his heartbeat had already risen into his ears from embarrassment. He merely held his breath and smiled back at Marshmallow as they stared back at him with a look that read, I know you did something, behave . So Cole held back and watched as Cashew caught up with Marshmallow at the first few shelves, his chest tightening as decided that maybe he should go off on his own for a bit. 

He let his gaze wander around the dimly lit shop- large dark brown shelves lined and stacked with books old and new alike in no particular order with piles of even more books in almost every aisle. There was a designated seating area at the front of the store- four small tables, each with two chairs on either side, two large bean bag chairs, and a bench with three cheap looking red cushions that was built into the windowsill. 

The lighting was soft and warm in a way that kind of reminded Cole of the barely illuminated closet in the library where Cashew and him had shared an afternoon. But this place was nothing like any kind of library Cole had ever been to. If the library was a sterile office lined with cubicles, then this book shop was a child’s bedroom- comforting and filled to the brim with well loved clutter and familiarity. A lot of heart was put into running this place, Cole would be a fool to not notice that much.

He walked past the front counter where a droopy looking old man stood reading a book of his own. He glanced up briefly from it as if feeling Cole’s gaze and flashed Cole a smile that could only be described as pure and full, before returning to his book. For a moment it made Cole feel full too. Of what, he wasn’t sure, but whatever it was made him relax a bit, his usual stiff posture softening. He took in a deep breath and pressed on, following the sound of his lover's voice. The air in the store had a… familiar scent. It was warm like honey and vanilla tea with a hint of rain… mixing with the expected old book smell, of course. 

He stopped at the end of the aisle where he had finally found where Marshmallow and the little squirrel had wandered off to. The two of them were huddled together, whispering over a book that they were sharing. Marshmallow said something that Cole couldn’t quite make out, but whatever it was it made Cashew laugh. Cole stood in silence, hands in his pockets as he leaned against the shelf opposite of where they stood, just out of view. He watched as they exchanged a few more giggles, speaking sweetly amongst one another before Cashew leaned down and planted a soft kiss on Marshmallow’s temple. Cole’s stomach dropped, his heart stuttering against his ribs. So much for keeping the upper hand. 

Before Cole had a chance to brood alone any longer, Marshmallow noticed him over their shoulder. They flashed him that heart bursting smile of theirs and suddenly guilt twisted inside of Cole’s stomach. Was he seriously getting jealous over shared laughs and a simple kiss on the forehead? What was he, a pathetic child? But Marshmallow was supposed to be his forever, and Cashew was supposed to be his-

“Hey sour puss, finally ready to play nice and join us?” Marshmallow asked, now standing right in front of Cole, grabbing his hand and pulling to where the aforementioned two had been standing previously. Cashew watched, a sincere look of joy on his face as Cole let himself be led to him. He was still holding the open book they had been laughing at.

“Cashew and I found this book about dreams. It’s really cool for the most part, but some of this stuff is just ridiculous.”

Cashew held the book up towards Cole, his smile deepening in a way that made Cole’s heart thump loudly in his chest like a drum.

“Look here,” Cashew said, pointing at a specific section of the page they were on, “It says here that according to certain research, dreaming about long or copious amounts of hair is tied to sexuality-”

“And that dreaming about cutting your hair all off can mean a loss of libido! Isn’t that ridiculous,” Marshmallow beamed up at him after cutting Cashew off, though it seemed the squirrel didn’t mind as he was also staring up at Cole with stars in his eye as they both waited for his response. It took him a moment to buffer from their sudden childlike excitement, but he slowly felt a grin crossing his lips. His heart was full.

“That is… pretty moronic,” he noted with a chuckle, leaning further into their circle. His shoulder brushed against Cashew’s, completely unintentional of course, but upon the sudden contact the squirrel boy stiffened just slightly, moving smoothly to the side so they were no longer touching. Cole gave an internal groan at himself for the way it made him feel.

“A-anyway, it also has information about colors. Like what dreaming about different colors mean,” Cashew said, avoiding the suspicion in Cole’s grimace and flickering panther tail as he nervously flipped back a few pages. Marshmallow placed a hand on Cashew’s arm, making him jump. What the hell? Cole thought. Was he missing something? Why was the little pest so jumpy all of a sudden? Had his little joke from earlier really riled him up that badly?

“I’m going to go see if they have any comics. You two can keep learning about dreams, but I need my nerd fix,” they planted a kiss on Cashew and Cole’s cheeks before disappearing back up towards the front of the shop. As soon as they were out of sight Cole returned his attention to the squirming squirrel boy.

“Well,” he started, leaning against the shelf next to them, just inches away from Cashew who was still oddly more twitchy than usual, “Go on. I’m very interested in what this book has to say about colors.” 

Cole tilted his head in playful curiosity, a mischievous grin dancing on his lips. Cashew swallowed and held the book closer to his chest.

“W-well… What color are you interested in? Do you have a favorite color maybe?”

Cole hummed, his eyes shifting to the side as if lost in thought.

“I have a few actually,” he responded, his eyes returning to Cashew’s. Cashew cleared his throat.

“Which first then?” the squirrel boy asked, rubbing the corner of the page between his fingers.

Cole leaned in, just a hair, just enough to cause Cashew to stutter backwards,  his back now gently pressed against the shelf behind them. Now , Cole thought, this is a familiar sight . 

“Hmm, let’s start with… black,” Cole said in a low tone. Cashew shifted anxiously as he stared down at the page.

“Loneliness, sadness… but it can also represent mystery and the unknown,” Cashew said, perking back up a bit at the newfound knowledge. What a little dork the little pest was, but Cole couldn’t help but smile back down at him. He shifted closer and continued with his next color.

“How about green,” Cole whispered, maintaining eye contact with the green eyed boy. Cashew’s face turned a soft shade of pink before his eyes were scanning the page again.

“H-healing, hope, and wealth,” he mumbled, bringing his head back up, but not meeting Cole’s gaze this time. To be fair he didn’t have much room to. Cole was so close now that their clothes brushed against each other, Cole’s face just a flinch away from Cashew’s forehead. The panther boy shifted one final time, adjusting himself to push Cashew further back against the bookshelf, his fingers gingerly trailing up Cashew’s arms. He dipped his head down so that his lips were grazing the squirrel boy’s ear.

“ Red .” Cole said simply, his voice dropped down an octave and laced with demand. Cashew shuttered, twisting his face to the side in an attempt to view the book that he was somehow still managing to keep a hold of. He barely got the first word out before Cole had bagan planting soft kisses below his ear and trailing down his jaw.

“C-Cole I-”

“Shhh…” Cole breathed against Cashew’s neck, “Go on then. What’s red mean?”

Cashew sighed, shifting in place and stumbling over his words.

“R-Red can mean passion, l- lust, or hah- ” he was cut off by Cole lightly nipping at a section below Cashew’s jaw.

“ Keep going, ” Cole purred against Cashew’s flushed skin.

“I-It can also mean p- power,” Cashew breathed, clearly barely holding it together. How adorable. Cole hummed against Cashew’s jaw before gripping beneath his chin and tilting Cashew’s face towards his, their eyes meeting. Cole’s heart was beating in his ears again, admittedly the thrill of being in another public space with Cashew melting under his touch was getting him a bit too worked up as well. Cashew’s eyes were blown out and his face was a pretty shade of red. 

Lust indeed.

But this wasn’t a large public library full of extra storage rooms available to hide in. It was a quaint, corner resale book shop. And Cole wasn’t alone with Cashew where he could swallow him whole if he wanted- they were on a joint date with Marshmallow, who could come looking for them at any moment. And as confident and bold as Cole liked to act, he was still terrified that Marshmallow would find out about his little plan and become cross with him. Or worse.

So he closed his eyes, nuzzled his face into Cashew’s hair and took in a deep, stabilizing breath. 

Ah, he thought, Warm honey vanilla with a hint of rain and old books. 

He pulled himself begrudgingly away from Cashew just as the squirrel boy had reached out and grabbed the front of his shirt- which did not help the tightness in his chest. He was still only a few inches away, their slightly labored breath mixing.

“What an interesting read,” Cole whispered, not looking away from Cashew for a second, “I’ll… buy it for you if you want.”

Cashew’s blush deepened, his gaze wandering off to nowhere in particular.

“I… Yeah. Thank you, I’d like that,” the flustered brunette responded quietly, a soft smile forming on his lips.

You want to kiss him. Just do it.

No, bad move.

Cole shoved his feelings back down his throat, swallowing hard. He pulled back from Cashew and shoved his hands back into his pockets in one swift movement. Cashew hesitated before releasing Cole's shirt, closing the still open book in his hand and holding it close to his chest, his warm smile still lingering. Cole started moving first, heading towards the front of the store where Marshmallow was waiting for them. He heard Cashew begin to follow shortly after.

When they returned to the sitting area of the shop, Marshmallow was seated in the windowsill seat, nose buried in a volume of some manga and surrounded by seemingly every other volume. The two boys exchanged looks and Cole couldn’t help but chuckle along with Cashew. They both sat down on either side of Marshmallow, leaning into them and effectively jolting them back to reality.

“Oh hey you two! I’m sorry I must’ve gotten distracted. I was going to come find you guys after checking out the first volume and well… aha,” they trailed off, motioning to the piles of books surrounding them and hiding their face slightly behind the current volume clutched tightly in their hands.

“It’s perfectly okay, my love,” Cole reassured, patting their head, “We were plenty busy enjoying that dream book. In fact we enjoyed it so much, I offered to buy it for little Cashew.”

Cashew blushed out of Marshmallow’s view as their face lit up.

“Oh, that’s wonderful! Oh my god, I’m so glad you two are finally getting along,” they yawned, leaning back against the window. Cole glanced over at Cashew who was still smiling silently, situating to lean against the window as well and effectively cuddling up to Marshmallow. Cole smiled at the two of them, beside himself with… he wasn’t sure. Or maybe he just wasn't ready to admit it.

“Indeed, it seems we are,” he mumbled almost to himself and then joined in, snuggling himself against Marshmallow’s other side, the chill from the window not even making him so much as shiver.

He was warm and his heart was full.

He felt sleep gripping at him as he settled in, a purr rising in the back of his throat.

You are so fucked.