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A shiver ran down Anna’s spine as she quickly skipped across the hallway, her fuzzy socks slipping on the polished wood like skates on ice. Her head had two close encounters with the wall by the time she reached the destination–Elsa’s bedroom.
It was dark as hell in the hallway, so she could easily see the light seeping out from under the door. With no time to waste knocking and waiting for an answer–and silently hoping Elsa was just reading or playing with her phone, and not doing something private that she should not see–she turned the doorknob and almost fell into the room.
“Anna?”
She shut the door behind herself and turned around to look at Elsa, who was, indeed, sitting on the bed with an open book in her lap, her brows furrowed in a mix of confusion and worry as she stared back at Anna over her reading glasses.
Without saying anything, she trotted over the floor, slowing down a little only once she reached Elsa’s fluffy rug until she almost flinged herself on her sister’s bed.
“Are you cold?”
Anna huffed irritatedly. “How’d you tell?”
Elsa reached to take off her glasses. “For one, you’re shivering and you have goosebumps on your arms,” she said, touching the tip of her–cold! Anna almost jumped–finger to Anna’s exposed elbow while she put her glasses away on the nightstand. “Two, you came in running here like a startled horse, and you had that little grumpy little baby expression.”
Anna pouted.
“Exactly this one.”
“Stooop,” she whined. Then she quickly swatted at Elsa’s hand as it was making its way to tickle her side. “Elsa! It’s not funny!”
Elsa giggled. “I’m sorry.” There was no hint of remorse in her voice. “I just thought that maybe a bit of physical activity could help warm you up.”
“More like physical torture,” Anna muttered, pulling her feet up to fold her legs on the bed. “Anyway, yes. I’m cold. I’m freezing, honestly.” She sighed. “It feels like maybe fifty degrees in my room, and the rest of the house is barely any better.”
It’s been a few months since they moved in together (after years of living apart, the pandemic of 2020 forced them to re-think the whole ‘independent living alone’ situation) to this lovely apartment in an old building, allegedly built in the early 1800s, a parting gift to them both from their late grandmother. The entire move took place at the beginning of August, when the Summer was still happily around, but not as hot as to make enough of an impact for either Elsa or Anna to notice anything odd–and with the following Autumn being very mild, it still never hit them something was very wrong until after the middle point of November.
Anna had been the first to notice. She’d been sitting in the kitchen pretty late at night, working on a very overwhelming project that made her completely lose track of time and space for a good few hours. Had it not been for the little burst of chilly wind on her neck, she’d probably have spent the entire night up.
Yes. Wind. Cold, frigid gust of wind through the soft hairs at the nape of her neck while she was sitting inside. At first, she’d thought it was a ghost–which she now could admit was maybe not the best assumption, but to her defense she and Elsa did spend the previous two weeks or so watching horror movies every evening.
So, naturally, she’d screamed in horror and ran out of the kitchen, zooming across the hallway to her room, where she’d hid under her covers for about two minutes before a very sleepy and confused Elsa appeared in her doorway.
They’d established it could not be a ghost–it took some time to convince Anna, though–and instead probably just a random little crack in some window frame that let in the cold air from the outside.
The random little crack seemed to be untraceable, though, and soon it had become very painfully clear they were instead dealing with isolation issues all over the place.
“Did you get an extra blanket?” Elsa asked, looking at her with that worry back in her eyes.
“I got three.”
“And you’re still cold?”
“Elsa,” she said–softly, lovingly, but with all the desperation of her aching bones, while she looked her sister deep in the eyes. “I’m not joking. It’s literally freezing in my room, and it’s only marginally better here and I have no freaking idea how you’re just sitting there like this.”
In an attempt to keep warm, Anna took to sleeping in a pair of those long, warm sweatpants and a hoodie, even though she hated the way they kept tangling in her three blankets to the point of her always ending up sleeping in some weird position for the entire night.
Meanwhile, Elsa was reclining against her pillows in nothing but a spaghetti strap silk nightgown.
“It doesn’t really bother me that much,” Elsa answered simply, shrugging with those bare, exposed shoulders. “I actually think the cold helps me sleep better.”
It took every ounce of willpower still left in her for Anna not to burst out laughing/crying at the same time.
Instead, she donned her best kicked puppy expression.
Elsa’s soft, vaguely worried expression turned to outright concern. “Is something wrong?”
“Can I sleep with you tonight?”
“Wha– yes?” It sounded less like Elsa agreeing, and more like her just wondering if that was even an option. “I mean– Yeah, you can. Will that help?”
Anna shrugged, turning her face away from Elsa to hide her embarrassed blush. “I felt a chilly breeze right on my head when I laid down in my bed tonight so I’m literally fresh out of other options. And it is a little warmer in your bedroom.”
Elsa nodded, then closed her book and put it next to her glasses, before patting the unoccupied side of her giant bed. “There’s plenty of room, so you can hop– actually, you probably want to grab some of your blankets. I only have this one.”
She held up her not exactly thick cover, as if to prove that it was of no use. With a deep, world-weary sigh Anna stood up and went straight for the door.
*
Less than two minutes passed before she barged back in with all of her necessities bundled up in her arms, then promptly went around Elsa’s bed to drop the heap on ‘her’ side.
“Really?” Elsa asked in an incredulous voice while Anna watched her pick up a plush seal from the pile. “You’re twenty-six.”
“And you’re judgmental,” Anna hissed back at her, snatching the toy away to put it next to her pillow. “It’s an anxiety thing.”
“It’s alright, Anna.” Elsa smiled. “I didn’t want to offend you. I’m sorry.”
Anna just huffed–too cold and tired to even think of a response–and laid out her blankets, then promptly jumped in the bed and burrowed. She let out a low, content grumble and heard Elsa laugh quietly in response.
A faint scent of cinnamon tickled her nose.
It was… surprising how open Elsa could be, sometimes. She thought back to the tickle attempt earlier–which she was too grumpy to appreciate at the moment, but could now think over with a clearer (warmer) head.
When she’d first come to the conclusion that she’d have to move in with Elsa, mostly due to financial problems tied to the world pandemic, she was mortified. The last time she’d lived with her was when they were both still in high school, and after Elsa’s graduation they didn’t exactly keep in touch all that often during college or afterwards. Honestly, moving in with her sister was almost like a random lottery roommate–completely unpredictable and potentially devastating.
But Elsa was a blessing. Even though they were forced to spend almost all their time together, it almost never felt like they were in each other’s way–and when it did, it was usually Anna’s own fault. Elsa worked quietly, cleaned up after herself, took care of bills and utilities and even cooked for both of them, none of which Anna herself was exactly known for. Perfect roommate, and it turned out it was Anna who had something to live up to.
And of course now she had to breach another layer of intimacy because of the damned cold house.
“Here, you forgot about this guy,” she heard a soft whisper right after Elsa turned off her light, and peaked out from under her cover to see Elsa holding her seal out to her. She took it slowly, and briefly wondered if Elsa thought she was a nuisance and was just very good at not showing it. “Are you a little warmer now?”
She spoke to her softly, like to a small child, and that pretty much answered Anna’s self-conscious question.
*
The next night, she tried sleeping in her own room, too ashamed to bother Elsa again. She woke up with a dull ache in her joints and blocked sinuses, courtesy of the damn little constant breeze blowing onto her head and shoulders.
Elsa would send her worried looks the entire day, sometimes asking her if there was anything she could do for her, offering tea, painkillers and even drawing her a hot bath to ease the pain. Really, she was too good to be true sometimes, definitely not the girl who left her at their parents’ place all those years ago without much of an explanation.
She’d refuse everything–aside from the bath–of course, at times resorting to saying she’s ‘an adult’ and ‘can take care of herself,’ like the headstrong fool she was.
*
She lasted a week before she just couldn’t stand it anymore.
“Ah, I was thinking about you.”
Elsa was sitting in her bed reading a book, again, but this time she seemed to be prepared for Anna–the other side of her bed was left empty, clearly meant for her to put all her stuff in.
All the better, since Anna literally came with her entire sleeping equipment in her arms.
“How’d you know?”
Elsa smiled. “The forecast said it was going to be three degrees out tonight. I figured you won’t be able to just stubborn your way through that.”
Anna gasped in mock–okay, not exactly fully mock–offense. She walked over to the empty side of the bed and dropped everything to start crafting her nest.
Elsa watched her carefully, almost to the point of discomfort on Anna’s side, but she didn’t comment anything. Again, she picked up her seal and held it while Anna tried her damnedest to straighten out her pile of blankets.
As soon as she managed that, she jumped in the bed so hard she almost knocked the book out of Elsa’s lap.
“Here.” Elsa placed the seal–Anna really should give it some name–in her arms and went back to her book.
For a moment they were silent, Elsa reading and Anna just lying there, enjoying the warmth and cursing under her breath. Somehow, one of her legs was already tangled in the sheets. Her favorite t-shirt and shorts combo wasn’t exactly the best for this kind of weather, but sleeping in sweatpants and a hoodie was a logistical nightmare to someone who moved around as much as she did.
“It’s going to be about three degrees for a few days now, and then it’s only dipping lower,” Elsa said suddenly just when Anna’s eyelids started to drop and she was slowly lulling herself to sleep. “We really need to fix the windows in your room, you can’t just walk around the entire day like a zombie,” she continued with a sigh, and Anna felt a wave of fresh embarrassment wash over her. “Say, why don’t you just keep sleeping in my room until we can get it done?”
The wave turned into a tsunami as she nodded.
*
Later that night, she woke up with a start, her heart beating in her throat and behind her eyes as she desperately fought to adjust them to the dark around her, trying to shake off the lingering fear.
“What’s wrong?”
She looked up with a sharp gasp, startled by the whispered question.
“I’m sorry.” Elsa’s brows were furrowed in worry when she reached out to touch Anna’s cheek. “I didn’t mean to startle you. Did you have a nightmare?”
With her throat still clenched, all Anna could do was nod.
“It’s okay.” The hand on her cheek moved to her temple, playing with her messy hair. “You’re alright.” The scent of cinnamon filled her nostrils. “I’m here.”
Anna relaxed the death grip on her seal as she let the soft, rhythmic caress slowly put her back to sleep, surrounded by the cinnamon scent.
*
They managed to get a hold of a repairman that had some free slots for the next month. Their neighborhood was full of very old buildings, and it really was showing by how sought out good repairmen were.
So, the next few days were a torture. Her room was sealed shut, but the entire apartment got so cold over time that even Elsa would sometimes shiver hard in the night, something that would wake Anna up with a start. Half-asleep but concerned, she’d pull the covers up to Elsa’s shoulders, only to have to wake up and repeat it after a few hours.
She was lying now next to Elsa in the dark, trying not to make too much ruckus as she attempted to rub her feet together without waking her sister up.
Which, obviously, she absolutely failed to do.
“Anna,” her voice was muffled by her covers, but Anna could clearly hear the annoyance. Normally, Elsa would try to keep most negative emotions out of her voice when she talked to her–something she noticed she very much did not do when talking with people in her Zoom meetings–but at about 2 a.m. she apparently couldn’t fight it anymore. “What are you doing?”
She asked the question in a softer voice, but there was still no mistaking how miffed she was at being woken up.
“I’m just…” she trailed off, not even sure if Elsa actually wanted to hear an explanation or just wanted her to stop, but after just a few seconds of her hesitation Elsa hummed expectantly for her to keep going. “My feet are super cold…”
Oh, that came out as a very pathetic whine. Not part of the plan.
Elsa sighed, then shuffled–she’d been facing the door with her back towards Anna, but now she turned to lie on her back, her bare shoulder almost brushing against Anna’s nose. She smelled really nice, a very festive mixture of cinnamon–her usual shower gel–and apple–her new shampoo–that somehow already made Anna feel warmer. She kept shuffling under the covers until suddenly Anna almost jumped when she felt Elsa’s fingertips on her hand.
“Come here,” Elsa whispered, retreating her arm and patting the bed somewhere next to her. “Under my cover. I’ll keep you warm.”
In the cold night air Anna’s face felt steaming.
“A-are you sure?”
Elsa nodded and turned back around, leaving the passage for Anna to slip her legs in until her feet touched Elsa’s calves. She heard a surprised inhale, and against reason Elsa shifted closer to her.
“Why did you take off your socks?” She said it over a yawn, and Anna felt really bad for keeping her up again. “Your feet are freezing.”
“I can’t sleep in socks.”
It was enough to try and sleep in pants. With socks, she only felt like she was capturing the cold next to her feet.
Elsa chuckled, and rubbed one of her own bare feet on Anna’s.
*
“What’s this?”
Anna looked curiously at the giant box in the hall. It was delivered while Elsa was taking a shower, and Anna’s been waiting for her to finish, almost buzzing in her seat with the need to know.
“Oh, I didn’t think they’d deliver it so fast.” Elsa was still drying her hair with a towel, dressed only in a thin tank top and sweats while Anna sat there in a giant plush robe wondering how in hell was her sister not just a giant cinnamon-scented icicle. “It’s a space heater.”
Anna’s eyes lit up.
“I figured you might use one in your room.”
“Oh.” That instantly dampened her enthusiasm, though. Over the past days she’d really grown accustomed to sleeping with Elsa–Anna felt much calmer and secure with someone in the bed with her, and to be honest Elsa was surprisingly warm once she started dozing off. With every night Anna would snake her way a little closer. First it was just her feet leeching Elsa’s heat, then her legs, and when Elsa didn’t seem to mind she’d actually migrate almost entirely under her cover, resting her forehead against the steady, warm presence of her sister’s back. Last night she was even able to finally sleep in a t-shirt and underwear, as god intended. “You want me to sleep in my room tonight?”
She didn’t actually mean to say that, especially not in this broken of a voice, but it was out before she could bite her tongue. Elsa’s eyes grew wider and Anna prepared for impact.
“Jesus, no!” Elsa looked like she’d just said the stupidest thing possible. “I meant that for sometime in the future when we fix your window. It’s minus four tonight, we might actually need to use this thing in my room first.”
Anna could only hope her face didn’t show how elated she was.
*
She came to Elsa’s room that night to find the bed set neatly–Elsa could really be a little of a pedantic freak sometimes, who the hell sets their bed every night–and Elsa standing in front of her TV, shuffling through videos on YouTube.
“Hey,” Anna said quietly, sitting down on Elsa’s side of bed with folded legs. Elsa murmured a greeting back. “What are you doing?”
The frustrated shuffling stopped for a moment. “I’m trying to find a– oh, this one looks nice! Turn off the light, please.”
Anna looked at her in confusion, but she reached over to the bedside lamp and tapped it gently. For a moment they sat in the dark as the video Elsa chose buffered, but then a warm, orange glow filled the room.
“A fireplace?”
The fire crackled happily on the screen. “Yeah, I thought it might be a nice ambience for sleeping,” Elsa chirped, which was very unlike her, while she bent down and– Anna had to turn her gaze away. Looking at her sister’s lace underwear was probably more than she could handle at the moment. “Especially combined with this.”
A soft hum followed right after and the ever-present, soft scent of cinnamon intensified–then Elsa moved out of the way and a wave of warm air hit Anna straight in the face. Elsa had to literally haul the heater into the room on her own while Anna was bathing.
“It does fit nice,” she admitted, looking into the flames and enjoying the warmth. “Almost like a real fireplace.”
Elsa climbed on the foot of the bed and crawled over to her on all fours, and suddenly there was more heat on Anna’s face and her mouth was dry. “You used to say you wanted a fireplace when we were kids,” Elsa said, shimmying on the bed until she was sitting next to her. “You had to be...five or six, and you’d keep saying you wanted to live in a cottage so that you could have a nice fire going every night and sit there with a cat in your lap, quote unquote like a witch.”
Anna laughed nervously and moved out of the way to let Elsa under her cover.
“And this is obviously nowhere near a real fireplace, but…”
She locked eyes with Elsa, and the orange glow of the TV made her irises look a fiery, sparkling purple. They were only a few inches apart, so close she could actually feel Elsa’s soft exhale blow over her own nose. Anna’s heart beat fast in her chest, fueled by some very odd and unwelcome emotions. “T-thank you,” she managed out through a clenched throat. Elsa really tried. She really, really tried, not only tonight but all the days before, pushing her own boundaries to accommodate Anna in her bed and it finally hit Anna just how much she had to love her.
And in this same, orange-glow filled, cinnamon-scented moment it also hit her how much she loved Elsa.
“Are you okay?”
Elsa’s face was concerned. Worried. Let down? Shit, she thought Anna didn’t like it.
“Y-yeah, I’m just– I’m super tired. I love this all, Elsa, thank you,” she repeated again just to make sure there was no mistaking how grateful she was for Elsa’s thoughtfulness, and something sank in her stomach at the sight of Elsa’s absolutely delighted smile. “Can we sleep?”
Elsa nodded and moved the covers away.
If not for the orange light, she would probably get worried again at Anna going absolutely white at the sight of her blankets spread nicely under Elsa’s cover.
“I figured this would be easier,” she said as she slid under and patted the space next to her. “You roll up into this tight ball every night before you fall asleep and then crawl under my cover anyway, so I figured this way you’ll be warmer.”
Anna gulped down the stone in her throat. “Y-yeah, sure.”
“We can even cuddle if you get cold. There’s supposed to be a blizzard tonight, so lots of wind.”
As if on cue a strong gust of wind rattled Elsa’s window and managed to get partially through, right onto Anna’s back. The surprised yelp and violent shiver at least let her hide how absolutely mortified she was with the idea of soft cuddles under the blankets with the fireplace glow.
Elsa pretty much pulled her under the blankets after that, and even tucked her in lovingly before lying down next to her–facing her, lord have mercy–and letting out a tired sigh.
“Goodnight,” she whispered, reaching out blindly to touch Anna’s cheek.
That one soft gesture sent a jolt down Anna’s spine. “Goodnight,” she answered, and she hoped that Elsa would pin the shaking in her voice on the cold gust of wind. Had she always felt like this? There had been a time in her life that Elsa was everything to her, but it was more like...younger sibling idolizing the older. Elsa had been her role model and her best friend, but after her high school graduation she just– Stopped. She wasn’t there anymore, busy with college, then busy with post-grad, then busy with work with no time to ever even visit. It seemed the only Anna ever heard from her was postcards and short birthday phone calls.
In that time she made herself at least pretend to resent Elsa for leaving her behind. She could never actually hate her, but the anger she felt was raw and it was at least better than grief.
But this Elsa– the Elsa that moved in with her, she was the same but she was different. The last time she actually saw her, she was a shy teenager with huge glasses and nerdy sweatshirts, always in a messy braid. When she saw the absolute glow-up Elsa went through, how beautifuller with emphasis on fuller she was, she did have to take a moment to collect herself.
Did she feel like– like this then, though? She was shocked, yes, but was she–
She looked up at Elsa’s calm, gorgeous face.
Was she–
This absolutely wonderful, sweet woman who literally had to take care of her because she was a fucking child that couldn’t even make sure to eat properly. The woman who would wake up half an hour early just to make her some chocolate chip or blueberry–or both because Anna was a mess–pancakes just because she knew it would make her happy. Who would randomly come up behind her and stroke her hair when she saw something was making her stressed, and it was the best way to calm her down. Who for the past few weeks would wake up in the middle of the night to soothe her after a nightmare, and who would never show any signs of irritation with her even when Anna acted like a whiny toddler.
Was she– Could she–
All of these little acts of affection that Elsa thought were innocent– that were innocent on her side and Anna has apparently been corrupting them in her depraved mind this entire time.
Was she in lo–
“Anna, what’s wrong?”
She opened her eyes to see Elsa look down at her with actual fear in her eyes and she realized she was shaking violently in her spot with no idea how much time had passed while she was spiraling. Her muscles were flexed and aching, jaw clenched so hard there was ringing in her ears. She was coiled in on herself like a tight spring.
“O–” she started, but her tongue felt like lead. “O-Olaf?”
Fear mixed with confusion. Then, suddenly, it changed to understanding. “Your seal?” Anna nodded. “It’s right here.”
She reached above Anna’s pillow and pulled Olaf out from where he was wedged, then softly placed him in Anna’s waiting hands. She immediately gripped him hard and curled up on her side, eyes tightly shut for fear of seeing her sister’s face.
“It’s okay,” Elsa’s whisper was breezing through her hair. “It’s fine, babygirl, I got you– d-do you want me to hug you?”
No, please, don’t. She nodded. I’m disgusting. Elsa enveloped her immediately, surprisingly strong as she pulled her closer to her chest. I don’t deserve to touch you. She burrowed her nose between Elsa’s breasts and inhaled.
Cinnamon.
She had no idea how long Elsa held her like this, her hand gently caressing up and down Anna’s bare arm, legs intertwined with Anna’s. She was planting soft kisses to the crown of Anna’s head. “It’s okay, baby, it’s alright,” she kept murmuring in between the kisses like a mantra, and with time it wasn't even the words Anna was listening but just her voice, her breathing, the rhythm of her heart.
Her own was still racing when she spoke. “I’m s-s-sorry.” The words, already stuttered and slurred, came muffled out against the bare skin of Elsa’s chest.
“No no, don’t be,” Elsa whispered hurriedly, not making a single move to pry her away. Even though she should. Anna should not be allowed to be anywhere near– there. “It’s my fault, sweetheart.”
What?
“I– I got overexcited and did things too fast,” she continued and if it wasn’t so hard for her to speak now, Anna would have shouted in disagreement. “I wanted to make things nice for you. I thought it would be– and then I saw how overwhelmed you were and I knew I messed up, and I– shit, I should have thought to give you Olaf earlier.”
Elsa remembered her plushie’s name.
“Do you want a tissue?” At first she didn’t understand the question, but then she realized she was crying. Heavily. Elsa’s chest was soaked.
She pulled away to try to answer–
Fuck, Elsa was gorgeous.
The glow dimmed considerably by now, but she could still make every detail of her face. Her big, round eyes. Her parted lips. The way she was looking at her with worry, but also pure adoration.
Anna wasn’t exactly thinking straight. She was very far from any remotely intelligent thought, her senses overwhelmed by cinnamon. At a complete loss of the ability to speak with so many things to say.
What she couldn’t say in words in her state, she instead said with her lips on Elsa’s.
In the next second it dawned on her that instead of repressing the feelings like she should she just fucking kissed her sister, and she immediately wanted to pull away and apologize, but Elsa held her in place with her hand on Anna’s stupid head.
They didn’t make out wildly like they do in the movies. It was a soft, tender and slow kiss. “It’s okay,” Elsa whispered against her lips in a few minutes. “It’s okay, baby.” She locked their lips again, a little firmer. “I understand.”
Four and a half thousand words all died on Anna’s lips, brushed off with Elsa’s tongue.
It was the explanation. It worked, for now at least, as she lay cradled in her sister’s arms, trading feathery kisses in the orange glow of their fake fireplace. In time, Elsa’s hand moved from her head to rest around her waist, keeping her warm and secure in place as she promised her we’ll talk tomorrow, don’t worry about this now and it’s going to be alright, love.
And a tiny voice in her head, so small she could barely hear it through the shouts of self-hate, said that maybe.
Maybe it was going to be alright.