Work Text:
She had never thought that home could be more than a place, more than four walls and a roof that she sporadically returned to between missions and deployments only if and when time allowed it. Settling down, getting married, growing old, none of these things had sounded even remotely appealing to her. A lone wolf for most of her life, she had seldom longed for another’s warmth. She had never felt like something was missing. Not until, one morning, she had found herself tangled in sheets and wrapped in tender longing as soft lips pressed even softer kisses to her neck.
Waking up beside Praline had quickly become one of Kikyo’s most cherished treasures.
“Good morning, beautiful.”
As sunlight crept past their drawn curtains in shades of pink and hues of gold, she felt her own lips curl into a smile.
Good morning.
Words had never come easy to Kikyo, either too fast or too slow but never just right. In lieu of a verbal response, she caught soft hands in her own calloused ones, running her battle-worn fingers along the smooth ridges of Praline’s sparkling finger nails, prim and proper and frivolously pink.
Loud colours always suited Praline best.
Their fingers entwined, Kikyo shifted a little closer to the warm body pressing against her back. As her fingertips danced along the gentle curve of Praline’s ring, a matching band of gold adorning her own left hand, she closed her eyes, a sigh leaving her lips as warm arms pulled her impossibly closer.
Even with every phrase and every language in all of Luxendarc at her disposal, Kikyo knew that she still would never find enough words to express her gratitude towards her wife, cluttered or not. Praline didn’t push. She simply understood.
It certainly helped that Praline talked enough for both of them, anyways.
“So, I was thinking,” she began, “since we have today off and with Crystmas right around the corner, how do you feel about a little shopping trip?”
With exhaustion still clinging to her limbs and the sweet lull of sleep in her bones, Kikyo’s first response was a heartfelt yawn. Truth be told, she could think of several things she'd rather do than leave the cozy warmth of their bed to trade it for Eternia’s ruthless winter mornings. Opportunities to be lazy and shamelessly self-indulgent were few and far-between amidst her assignments and Praline’s busy schedule.
Nimble toes found their way beneath Kikyo’s blanket, running teasingly along the soles of her feet. It was all she could do to choke back her laughter and erupt into furious giggles instead as Praline’s fingers tickled along her sides, taking full advantage of her shifting and squirming to turn her around and place a loving kiss on her forehead.
“I know you don’t like crowds but I have to look perfect for my darling fans at the fundraising event next week and my nails look horrible!”
As the tickling subsided and she was allowed to catch her breath, Kikyo opened her eyes once more, meeting Praline’s as they gazed back at her. Even with her blonde hair pulled back into a messy ponytail and shallow imprints of their bedsheets still visible on her cheek, there was not a single thing about Praline that she would even think to describe as horrible.
Heaving another sigh and rolling her eyes in a near-theatrical fashion, she touched her forehead to Praline’s before bringing their entwined hands towards her lips. She always loved how warm Praline’s hands were, especially whenever she placed kisses along her delicate fingertips. The blush dusting her wife’s cheeks at the tender gesture was only a few shades shy of her flamboyant nail polish.
“Yeah okay, maybe not horrible,” Praline agreed sheepishly. “But they are pink! It’s snowing outside and my nails are pink and glittering when they should obviously be blue and shimmering!”
Despite feeling the telltale creases on her forehead as she raised her eyebrows in abject disbelief, Kikyo abstained from pointing out that it was always snowing in Eternia, regardless of season. Praline was smart enough to realize the flimsy nature of her reasoning by herself, so really, whatever had brought this on, she knew better than to think her wife had suddenly grown vain enough to care about matching her attire to the weather.
“And I need cute snowflake hair clips to go with my white dress or else the press will have a field day! Can you imagine the headlines? Praline à la Mode - unfashionaaabluh! Sounds horrible, doesn’t it?”
Understanding dawned on her as green eyes suddenly avoided hers. In spite of their peaceful morning, Kikyo felt her mood souring. Time and again she had assured Praline that yes, she was beautiful and yes, so was her voice but there was only so much she could do when Praline’s demons thrived on years of indoctrination and self-doubt. It was one of the few things she had never understood about Floremese culture, the fervent need to be recognized as strikingly beautiful to the point of self-destruction.
Florem may have been a safe haven for women once. Nowadays, it was simply a cesspool of toxic ideals and questionable virtues. Certainly, it did nothing to alleviate her wife’s feelings of inadequacy to be employed in an industry that fed on her shortcomings and spat her out spent and self-conscious. On most days, Praline wore her supposed faults with pride, denying any and all allegations that her singing was pre-recorded and her songs not heartfelt. Ridicule and mockery could hardly phase her under the watchful eyes of the world. It was only when she was alone, out of sight and out of mind, that Kikyo caught her with shaking shoulders and restless glances.
She knew not a single soul who worked harder than Praline to achieve her dreams.
“Youwillneverbeanythingbutbeautifultome!”
As always, the words tumbled from her lips without poise or pause and as always they were never enough to express the turmoil brewing inside her chest.
“Don’tlistentothosewannabejournalis-mph!“
Through the genuine surprise at her sudden outburst and the look of sheer concentration on her beloved’s face as she listened closely and tried to decipher Kikyo’s enraged gibberish, somehow, magically, Praline’s lips found hers in a smothering kiss, silent thank yous filling the bedroom as, finally, her smile returned, brilliant and breathtaking and so wonderfully precious.
“So. You’re coming along, right?” Mirth clung to Praline’s every word as emerald eyes looked at her expectantly. “We could grab a bite to eat afterwards. Takeaway if you’d prefer to eat at home.”
Well, she thought as the anger inside her slowly died down, how am I supposed to deny you now?
With a final deep breath she forced her thoughts and words to slow down. Then, she finally answered.
“Sounds lovely.”
───※ ·❆· ※───
It was not lovely.
In fact, it was tiring and suffocating and mentally draining to mix in with the crowd as she waited for Praline’s nails to get done. She had waited in the salon at first, admiring the handiwork of the woman painting intricate frost flowers on Praline’s pastel blue fingernails. For a foolish moment she had even considered having her own nails painted until she remembered that as the holder of the ninja asterisk she had to be able to blend in and change appearances rapidly and effortlessly. Elaborately decorated nails would certainly prove to be detrimental in her line of work.
It was when Praline decided that she wanted tiny crystals applied to her nails that Kikyo decided to wander and do some window-shopping instead of whiling away the time inside the too hot and too tiny beauty salon, complimentary refreshment potions be damned.
At first, wandering the cold streets of Eternia seemed only marginally better. None of the shops and market stands had caught her interest, initially. It was only when she came across a merchant from Harena who offered a rich palette of assorted powders and paints for facial application that she decided to linger and ponder whether she really needed more makeup in her already too full bathroom cabinet. (And since the answer was a resounding no, she stayed a little longer, just in case, to ponder whether she wanted more makeup regardless of necessity.)
“I bet that these colours would look great on you!”
Surprised, Kikyo turned around just to come face to face with the smiling merchant, his sunkissed skin and honeyed eyes a rare sight in Eternia. Already, she felt the familiar weight of anxiety slowly curling and writhing in her chest as the silence following the merchant’s words stretched and the expectant smile started to fade, polite confusion taking its place.
Despite being the holder of the ninja asterisk, her usual modus operandi was far from smooth and swift when confronted with unexpected social interactions.
On the tip of her tongue, a thousand and one words were fighting to erupt at once, apologies and excuses and justifications that she was clearly minding her own business, avoiding to make eye contact as a clear signal that no, she was not ready to chat and yes, she’d rather be left to her own devices. As her panic simmered and became almost tangible, however, she remembered that the merchant was not a local. He was as unfamiliar with her quirks and preferences as the Eternian shopkeepers were well aware of her tacit ways.
For a fleeting moment she weighed the benefits of disguising herself and letting loose the barrage of words in her mind yearning to leave her lips, all cluttered and tangled and barely coherent. Then again, she really didn’t need any more makeup taking up space in her house…
As she motioned to return the assortment of delicate pots and flasks that had caught her attention to avoid further confrontation, an arm found its way around her waist.
“If you like them, then buy them. I already indulged myself today, so it’s only fair that you do the same.”
Slender fingers gently took one of the pots from her grasp, sparkling crystals catching the fading daylight and shimmering in light hues of blue.
“Besides, that might come in handy for work, don’t you think?”
As Praline’s scrutinizing gaze swept over the merchant’s display, a soft gasp caught Kikyo’s attention.
“P-Praline? Aren’t you Praline à la Mode? The singer?”
Immediately she felt more than saw how Praline’s demeanour changed within a split second of realizing that she was in the company of one of her admirers. Kikyo felt her anxiety ebb away as the merchant erupted into barely confined glee at meeting his idol. It was definitely one of the benefits of being married to a well-known singer, to be out of sight and out of mind within seconds of someone recognizing her spouse. While Praline thrived on attention, Kikyo was just as happy to be left in the shadows.
As Praline and the merchant engaged in conversation, Kikyo breathed a sigh of relief. It was nice to see her wife glow with happiness, her fears of the morning hopefully forgotten for now. It was only after they paid for their purchase and said their goodbyes - well, Praline did - that Kikyo found the time to take a closer look at her wife’s freshly painted nails.
“Amazing, aren’t they! Look at how they sparkle!” Having noticed Kikyo’s curious glances, Praline gave her hand a final squeeze before letting go and proudly presenting her nails. “I know, I know, I said I wanted them to shimmer but when I saw these crystal shards I simply couldn’t say no! I’m sure they will go well with the dress.“
There was not a single doubt in Kikyo’s mind that Praline would look stunning, regardless of how much effort she put into her outfit. She was the kind of person that seemed perpetually warm and welcoming, her smiles radiant and her songs thrilling. Although she was undeniably easy on the eyes, Kikyo liked to think that it was her energetic spirit and her contagious positivity that drew Praline’s admirers in. It was definitely what made Kikyo fall for her, heads over heels, many years ago.
As she was lost in thought, Praline proudly presented a pair of silver hair clips with fluffy white snowflakes attached to them.
“I also got these! They are so soft! Maybe you could paint a snowflake on my face to match these clips for the concert. Oh, and I could wear blue lipstick…”
Their steps accompanied by the soft crunch of frozen snow, Kikyo took Praline’s hand once more, silently watching as the sky grew dark and stars blinked into existence one by one. As Praline sorted through her various thoughts and ideas, her excitement about the upcoming concert only poorly veiled, Kikyo was happy just listening to her. She knew better than to think that Praline expected her to follow every single one of her thoughts. As much as Kikyo preferred to internalize her thoughts and feelings, Praline liked to bounce her ideas off of others, if only to hear them voiced aloud at least once to decide whether or not they sounded viable or not to her own ears.
What a pair they made. A bubbly performer and a reclusive assassin. But maybe it was because of their differences and not in spite of them that they fit together like two lost pieces of a puzzle.
You will be the Diva of the Benefit, Praline.
“Watch out Luxendarc, here I come,” Praline announced, her fist raised towards the sky as if she had heard Kikyo’s musings. And maybe, she thought as Praline’s lips mirrored the bemused smile on her own face, maybe she had long since become an open book for the one person who could convince her to leave the safety and warmth of her bed to go shopping on a cold winter morning.
“Come on, let’s get something to eat,” Praline said, gently squeezing her hand once more. “All of this shopping is making me hungry.”
With an answering squeeze of her own, Kikyo decided that a day spent easing Praline’s worries by going out and about to shop and socialize was a day well-spent.
───※ ·❆· ※───
Home was not a place. Home was a lost girl from Florem and a joyful heartbeat next to her own.
She would never grow tired of listening to Praline’s gentle humming. As the heat of their bath slowly seeped into Kikyo’s body, the tension in her muscles lessened and her aching feet felt light and warm. With her eyes closed and her arms curled around her lover’s waist, peace found her weary mind.
“Set in my sights, get you tonight…”
Through the fragrant haze of scented candles and rosehip oil, Eternia’s ruthless winter felt miles and lifetimes away. Listening to the verses of an all too familiar song, Kikyo almost felt the smoldering winds of Eisenberg on her skin as it carried the scent of ashes and brimstone from Mount Karka all across the barren continent.
How odd it was, to think that she had found love in a country ravaged by a gruesome civil war of all places. Praline had never truly belonged on that battlefield, not with her cutesy dresses and her melodious voice, perpetually singing and rhyming and dancing to music only her own ears were privy to. She had all but scoffed at the countless members of the Black Blades that had followed Praline’s every step, quite literally worshipping the ground she walked on like she was a goddess and not some misguided girl from a faraway city who was desperate enough to join the army just to see the world and find an audience for her songs.
In a way, she had pitied Praline. Until it was Praline who took pity on her in her lowest moment.
A mere hug had been all it took for Kikyo to stop doubting and feeling sorry for herself after the gruesome realization that a bunch of clueless kids had been her undoing. Eternia’s finest, defeated by a traitor and her teenage friends, few of them seasoned warriors like her. In truth, Praline had probably been closer to them in terms of battle prowess than Kikyo. And still she had failed to trick them.
‘You can’t win every battle.’ Hearing the somber tone of Praline’s voice had been sobering back then. In truth, she had always thought her incapable of being anything but annoying and self-absorbed. ‘Sometimes you will earn standing ovations,’ the younger woman had said, her head leaning against Kikyo’s shoulder, ‘and sometimes you will be booed off the stage. It’s okay to be upset. But don‘t let it eat you up. Otherwise you will never shine like the star you are.’
Praline had sung for her back then as well. Softly, soothingly. In a way, she mused, as her thoughts went back to the little exchange they had shared in the morning, it was always their insecurities that weighed them down the most. Praline’s fear of not being enough, of being doomed to a life in mediocrity. Her own fear of failure, of expressing herself freely. It was calming to know that Praline knew how to lift the weight off her shoulders. And even better to know that she could do the same for her wife.
‘And if you are ever too weary to go on,’ Praline had promised, ‘just give me a call! I will sing and cheer you on! That’s my specialty!’
They had met on a battlefield and formed an unlikely alliance to withstand any hardships that life chose to throw at them.
Theirs truly was a-
“Love in the crossfire.”
As the final notes of Praline’s impromptu singing faded to silence, Kikyo found herself pleasantly relaxed, the smooth skin of her lover’s abdomen like silk beneath her fingertips as they traced lazy patterns across her stomach. For a heartbeat or two, the world around them ceased to exist as Praline leaned back against her chest and rested her hand on Kikyo’s thigh, stroking the side of her knee with the pad of her thumb. It was in idle moments like this that Kikyo felt grateful for whatever trick of fate that had caused their paths to cross and intertwine. She had always been a lone wolf. But for Praline, she did not mind so much to shed her chosen solitude.
“Hey,” a soft whisper roused her from her drowsy thoughts. Slowly, she blinked her eyes open, meeting Praline’s tired gaze. “Thank you for today. For listening. And for the company.”
Her chest felt incredibly light and warm as the woman who held up her world with her cheerful smiles and loving kisses glanced back at her like she, too, meant the world to her.
Anything for you.
She liked being alone. But she loved being alone together even more.