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Bucky was waiting for a pick up from a Quinjet and he ducked into a honky tonk bar to wait out of the rain. No one in there blinked an eye at his assault rifle and some man at the bar with a POW patch on his jacket had the pretty waitress bring him a beer.
There was music coming out of a jukebox in the corner and when the song came on a man at a full table let out a hoot.
As Bucky listened to the song and slipped his beer a smile began to curl the corners of his lips. His com chirped with an ETA of less than a minute and he walked over to the bar to set his beer down and ask the man. “What song was that?” He asked with a big grin. “I’ve never heard a song that suited Stevie better in my whole damn life.”
“You mean Captain America?”
“I mean the dumb shit that even when he was 5 foot nothing and breathing too hard could kill him still got into fights every day of the week like it was his job. Only thing that’s changed is he’s tougher now but he’s still a dumb shit who would fight the Hulk if he looked at him wrong.”
The man laughed and gave him the name of the song and the singer as Bucky heard the Quinjet arrive.
“Thanks.”
“No problem Soldier.”
Bucky grabbed the drop line and walked into Steve’s debriefing with a shit eating grin. As he pulled his phone out he texted JARVIS to set things up and to make sure to get it on video. He wanted this saved for prosperity.
The next morning while the Avengers sat around eating breakfast and just as Steve returned from his run the music started to play.
Everyone looked up at the ceiling, the common response when questioning JARVIS then down at Tony but he looked just as confused.
“Listen up Punk. This is your song.” Bucky drawled from beside the coffee maker with a biggest shit eating grin.
“If you’re gonna be dumb you gotta be tough.”
The very first line saw Clint falling on the floor clutching his belly and Steve blushing as he glared at Bucky.
“If you get knocked down you gotta get back up.”
Bruce hid a smile behind his tea cup.
“I ain’t the sharpest knife in the drawer But I know enough to know. If you’re gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough.”
Tony stumbled from his stool quickly staggering over to Bucky and burying his face in the taller man’s shoulder to muffle his sniggers.
Steve crossed his arms and glared at Bucky even as his fair skin turned red.
“I lit my brain with rotgut whiskey till my pain was chicken fried. I’ve had dudes with badges frisk me. Teach me how to swallow pride.”
Clint is helpless on the floor holding his stomach as he laughed and turned almost as red as Steve.
“I took advice no fool would take. I got some habits I can’t shake. I ain’t the sharpest knife in the drawer but I know enough to know. If you’re gonna be dumb you gotta be tough.”
“If you’re gonna be dumb you gotta be tough! When you get knocked down you gotta get back up. That’s the way it is in life and love. If you’re gonna be dumb you gotta be tough.”
Thor started to choke on his poptarts and Bruce gave him several hard smacks on the back to clear his windpipe. “Friends. That line might be for me!”
“I’ve been up and down and down and out. I’ve been left and right and wrong. Yeah, I’ve walked the walk and I’ve run my mouth. I’ve been on the short end for too long.”
Natasha nudged Clint with her toes but he only smiled up at her with a huge grin and tried unsuccessfully to catch her foot.
“But if they gave medals for honky tonk wars Hell I’d put mine in my chest of drawers with my IRS bills and divorce papers and all that stuff. If you’re gonna be dumb you gotta be tough.”
Tony wrapped his arms around Bucky and was fortunate the Soldier reciprocated and prevented him from joining Clint on the floor as he laughed hard into his side.
“If you’re gonna be dumb you gotta be tough. When you get knocked down you gotta get back up. I ain’t the sharpest knife in the drawer, but I know enough to know. If you’re gonna be dumb you gotta be tough. If you’re gonna be dumb you gotta be tough.”
As the music petered out Steve was red all over mostly from trying mightily not to laugh at Bucky’s shit eating grin.
“That is your song Stevie.”
“The Hell it is. I ain’t dumb.”
Bucky gave him a look. “Who was it that tried to fight Donnie Boyle and his three big brothers? At once? In January?”
“Ah they had it coming.”
“Who was it that got into 9 different fights over the 4th of July weekend in 41’?”
“I was drunk!”
“And who is it that cannot fly and yet insists on jumping out of planes without a parachute?”
“But I’m fine!”
“And you’re dumb. If you weren’t such a scrappy son of a gun and you didn’t have me to bail you out of jail before the serum you’d be dead by now.”
Steve sputtered for a minute before turning and leaving the room.
Clint continued to laugh helplessly on the floor though he’d be the first to agree with Thor that there were more than a few lines in there that applied to him.
Tony took several deep breaths. “JARVIS? JARVIS? Please-”
“Already taken care of Doll.” Bucky chuckled at the look on Tony’s face. “Oh I’m not letting him live this down ANY time soon.”
JARVIS popped up a scene showing Steve entering the gym and the song starting up again as Steve covered his face from Sam’s amused face leaving the showers as Steve entered them.