Chapter Text
Three weeks. Three weeks is all it took to start feeling the very first symptoms.
Ever since those blissful three days where they tried going for a baby after having drunk the magic tea, Namaari was on high alert. She practically gave Raya the third degree each morning, asking how she felt, if she had noted changes in her body. But every passing day, Raya denied feeling something out of the common. Being so focused on her wife, Namaari hadn’t noticed her own body aches and changes until that fateful morning she woke up with an upset stomach.
She blamed it on the extra helping of rice she had for dinner, going to bed with a full stomach. But the longer she stayed in bed, the longer she became aware of the churning sensation, the foul taste on her mouth getting too much to bear. Before her wife could ask what was wrong, Namaari had to rush to the bath area with the abrupt urge of throwing up.
Raya came to her aid, rubbing soothing circles between her shoulder blades and grabbing the long side of her undercut. Namaari closed her eyes and sighed, feeling a wave of sudden exhaustion wash over her, her wife’s touch helping her to feel grounded.
“Namaari, are you okay?” The softness of Raya’s voice made her heart melt. She tried to sit up against the wall and smiled up at her. “I guess so. I need to remember that stuffing my face at dinner isn't a good idea”. Raya crouched down next to her, eyebrows knotted with worry. She looked at Namaari’s face for a long moment before tenderly tucking her hair behind her ear, hand lingering on her earlobe to massage it. “I hope that’s the reason, we don’t want the Chief of Fang getting sick while trying to get pregnant, huh?” Namaari nodded, bathing on the warmth of the hand that now cradled her cheek softly. She still felt nauseous, but with Raya by her side, she felt tons of times better.
The next time she noticed a new pain in her body, she was getting ready to meet her mother to talk about the new trades she had agreed on with Talon. It was early morning. Raya was already gone, busy with her own duties. After taking a quick bath, Namaari headed to the dressing area the two of them shared. After putting on her underwear, she tried to bind her chest as she always did. But a pained hiss escaped her lips when the fabric brushed her chest. Her breasts - especially her nipples - felt so sore she couldn’t stand the normally welcomed pressure the binding offered. She discharged the piece of cloth aside in favor of not wearing it under her top, hoping her mother didn’t notice it or scolded her for it. Some things didn’t change, even if she was the Chief now.
That same day, Namaari left her office with the emeritus Chief of Fang to meet Raya for lunch. Typically, they’ll have lunch alone, but her wife had insisted on eating with them since she hadn’t seen her mother-in-law in a few weeks. When the three of them arrived at the dining area, the delicious aroma of Tom Yum Goong wafted from the nearby kitchens. Raya eagerly took her seat, commenting how hungry she felt, gaining an amused look from Virana. However, Namaari sat on her chair, face getting paler as time passed, hands clutching tightly the fabric of her pants in an attempt of stopping the sickening sensation invading her.
“Namaari, dear. Are you alright? You look pale”. Virana told her, hand coming to her daughter’s shoulder. Namaari flinched, her stoic demeanor was not as stoic as she thought. “It’s just my stomach, mother. I’ve been feeling sick for some days now. The smell of the food made me feel suddenly nauseous”. Virana took in this piece of information with a raised eyebrow, suspecting the real meaning behind the stomachache. Still, she squeezed her daughter’s shoulder gently and smiled reassuringly. “Oh, don’t worry, my morning mist. I’ll talk with the kitchen staff and they’ll bring something to make you feel better”. With a respectful nod, the emeritus Chief left the couple to go to the kitchens. Her daughter needed some adjustments on her diet if her suspicions were correct.
A week after it all started, Namaari felt utterly spent. She had no energy whatsoever, the mere act of getting up from their bed each morning feeling like the hardest milestone she had ever accomplished. Raya saw it all with worried eyes, letting her sleep as much as her body needed. Or as long as her duties left her to stay in bed. It was well past sunrise when she got up, a weird feeling on her lower stomach. She sighed. It probably meant her period was about to start - if it hadn’t started already -, so she made her way to the bathroom as slow as molasses, dragging her feet all the way. But when she got there and checked, her period was nowhere to be seen.
With a frown, she went to her desk in a hurry. A part of her knew that something was not adding up. With just one look at her calendar, Namaari realized with a start that her period was due almost two weeks ago. Her mind reeled, putting together all the pieces. The aches, nausea, exhaustion, the significant delay in her period. She stood by her desk for a long time, eyes wide, hands on her chest to try foolishly to calm her racing heart.
The moment she was able to move again, Namaari rushed with regained energy to get her wife. Raya was probably ending her last meeting of the day, so she went straight to the meeting room and waited impatiently for her to be over. The moment she left the room, Namaari grabbed her wrist and ran to the nearest empty hallway. She pushed Raya against the cool marble of the wall and took her hand on her shaky one. Raya gave her a confused and concerned look before she kissed her palm, trying to ease her uneasiness.
Taking a deep breath, Namaari gathered the courage to talk. “I think we did it. I think I'm pregnant” she whispered, voice full of wonder. Raya looked at her in shock, eyes impossibly wide as she stared at her wife. Her stomach. Her face. And then her mouth. She crushed their lips together, grabbing her waist to pull her in. Raya ended the kiss after a moment to bump foreheads with Namaari, noses tenderly brushing. “We’ll have to ask the healers about their opinion, but just the thought of you carrying our child makes me stupidly happy”. Namaari smiled and pecked her lips sweetly before embracing her, face tucked on her wife’s neck. “I hope I’m not wrong, it makes me stupidly happy too” she murmured, relaxing on Raya’s arms to feel all the love she was pouring on their tight hug.
It only took a visit to the healers to confirm Namaari’s pregnancy. They left the room hand in hand, completely overjoyed by the good news. After some minutes walking to the dining room where their family must be waiting for them to have dinner, they stopped by Namaari’s office to have a much-needed moment alone, trying to take everything in. Raya entered and took a seat on her wife’s desk, leaving the chair for her. Namaari sat before her, looking into Raya’s eyes with disbelief written all over her face. “Holy shit... We really are going to be mothers. We’re having a baby. It’s… Insane but at the same time I’m so excited” whispered Raya in an ecstatic tone, her hands resting over Namaari’s on her knees. Fang’s Chief breathed in deeply and smiled radiantly at her.
“It’s terrifying,” she answered, getting up to place a chaste kiss on her wife’s forehead. “But I’d lie if I say I’m not thrilled to see how this grows” she placed their joined hands over her stomach, still not wrapping her mind around the idea that in no time it would swell with their child. Raya looked at her with tears forming on the corner of her eye, and grabbed her chin with her free hand to bring her closer. “Would I sound crazy if I told you I already love them?” Namaari shook her head no, trying to contain the emotions that swirled on her chest, before closing the gap between them to convey all her feelings into a warm kiss.
That same evening, they told their closest family and friends about it. Everyone was elated to know they succeeded, they would bring the first biological child of two women into the world. The very first one after Kumandra reformed. Heir of both Fang’s and Heart’s throne and title.
Within a couple of days, the news spread around Kumandra. Dragons visited them, Chief sent their regards, the palace staff carefully watched Namaari’s actions and feelings, trying to get her as comfortable as possible. And, of course, their family and friends gave them all the tips and advice they could muster, from useful tea recipes to soothe the morning sickness to questionable methods to prevent the tiredness Namaari already felt.
It was a matter of time the baby bump started to show. Barely over a month after getting the healer’s visit, it was evident to anyone that the Chief of Fang was pregnant. Namaari tried to wear her old clothes, not wanting to lose her sharp warrior appearance as long as her fit form. But it was in vain. She struggled to get her trousers over her hips, a frustrated sigh on her lips. Raya watched her with amusement every morning until she tried to reassure her wife, embracing her by the waist and looking into her eyes through the mirror.
“You know, it doesn’t matter that the fierce Chief of Fang loses her abs and changes her outfits to something with more room for her growing belly. You’re still a strong warrior and a caring leader. I promise no one is going to look at you in a different light just because you don’t wear what you always do.” Namaari sighed, placing her hands over Raya’s on the swell on her stomach, wondering how long it would be until she felt their baby moving inside her. “I know you’re right, but I can’t help to feel like this. I don’t want to look fragile to my people. That side of me is reserved for you. For us. For our family.”. Raya smiled empathetically, perfectly knowing her wife’s insecurities, the number of complicated feelings she still tried to keep to herself. “Then we’ll have to ask the seamstress to make you new clothes. Pregnant fierce warrior clothes. What do you think?” Namaari smiled at her and brought her hand to kiss her knuckles tenderly. “I think that I love you” she whispered, watching with delight Raya’s flustered reaction, a gentle kiss grazing the bare skin of her shoulder. “I love you too, dep la ”.
They moved back into Heart with the start of the warmer season, expecting to return to Fang when its humid heat started to vanish. By the time they arrived, Namaari’s first aches and nausea had completely disappeared, now replaced with other symptoms. Some of them were rather normal and easy to stand, like the itchy feeling on her belly, skin pulled tight to make room for the baby. Others were insufferable like the awful sensation heartburn left her after every meal. And others were rather funny. At least from Raya’s perspective.
At this point in her pregnancy, Namaari had gotten used to how fast her belly grew. She acquired a more relaxed look, baggier clothes that she could use for longer. What she didn’t expect was that her breasts also seemed to grow. Raya had made some crude observations about it, but she didn’t notice until one day she looked down, and she couldn’t see her feet. Her vision was blocked by her chest and baby bump. Now all the back pain she’d been experiencing for the past month made sense. Raya’s sudden obsession with laying her head on her chest as well.
Staying in Heart this time of the year has its perks. The threes were heavy with ripe fruits, ready to be the main ingredient of many of her favorite desserts. Namaari’s sweet tooth only got more evident with her pregnancy, seeming to crave something sweet every single day. Or at random hours in the middle of the night. Many of them, she sneaked away from Raya’s embrace to sneak into the palace’s kitchens. There was Chief Benja, already waiting for her. He was her partner in crime, the two of them bonding over whatever delicious dish the staff had left ready for them to devour. When this happened, they talked about everything that came into their minds for hours, usually sharing their inner turmoil and worries about Raya, about the pregnancy, about Kumandra. After having their fill and reassuring each other, Benja embraced Namaari and kissed her forehead, the woman returning the embrace eagerly. After everything that happened between the two of them, he was like a second father to her.
Watching their baby grow on Namaari’s body was enough for Raya, knowing they were safe inside her. But sometimes, she craved feeling whatever Namaari felt, wanting to be a part of the process. Every night, when night fell and they both shed their clothes to lay close to each other after a hard day, Raya embraced her wife flush against her body, caressing her new curves and dips with featherlight touches. Namaari melted under her ministrations, making a pleased sound on the back of her throat that reminded Raya of a serlot’s purr. This new version of Namaari was way softer, more open to receiving affection and loving touches. And Raya adored every single inch and second of it. Every now and then, her hands stayed on her belly, protected between their bodies. She hoped to feel something, a small sign that the baby inside reacted to the gentle strokes she brushed over Namaari’s skin.
She had lost hope. She knew the baby would love her, but she couldn’t help feeling rather sad when Namaari talked about how she would feel kicks from time to time and she couldn’t feel anything but her wife’s relaxed breathing. That was until she grabbed her hand to place it near over her navel, feeling a gentle bump against her skin. She looked into Namaari’s eyes and found her already smiling, nothing but adoration and love glowing in them. “No need to be sad, they know their Ma is here. You just have to wait for the right moment to feel how excited they get every time you touch me, whenever they hear your voice. We’re going to have a warrior, judging how much they love to kick me. That’s all you, you know”. Namaari brushed a running tear from her cheek, placing a sweet kiss to reassure her. Raya smiled, a wet laugh on her mouth. “Oh, don’t act like you wouldn’t kick anyone’s ass if you had the chance” she joked, moving to rest her head on Namaari’s shoulder, face tucked into her neck. “I’m sorry for being silly,” she murmured against her wife’s warm skin, breathing her in. Namaari massaged her scalp with her nails, gently brushing unruly locks. “It’s not silly. You’re allowed to feel sad. It’s your baby as well, I understand you want to feel them as much as I do. But don’t worry, you’re going to reach a point where you’re going to be tired from all their movement.” Raya nodded and embraced her closer, needing the contact to really acknowledge her words, needing it to relax completely. She couldn’t wait until that moment arrived.
Monsoon season was due every time now. Raya and Namaari left Heart with tons of their favorite sweet treats and a promise to see Benja soon. The pregnancy was coming to an end very soon, and Namaari needed the safety of her home to feel protected if the moment of bringing their baby into the world came sooner than expected. It was embarrassing to admit to her wife that when it happened, she wanted to have a moment with her mother, needing the wisdom of someone she trusted that had given birth before. Raya understood this and guaranteed her that she would make everything in her hands to make her feel safe and comfortable when they welcomed their baby.
Her baby bump was rather heavy now. Behind were the moments where she felt light and swift in her movements. Now she felt exhausted during the day and had trouble falling asleep at night. Her back smarted from all the weight she carried around and her feet would swell coming the last hours of sunlight. To top it all off, the baby was definitely Raya’s child. They would kick around, making her wince when suddenly it was hard to breathe. Other times, she had to run as fast as she could to the next bathroom, knowing the kicks on her bladder would end up in an embarrassing disaster if she didn’t go. At night, when they tried to relax together, the baby would make themselves known rolling around. From the outside, it looked like Namaari’s stomach held a little alien rather than their sweet child. Raya watched in amusement, murmuring sweet nothings against the skin of her wife’s belly.
But with barely a month to finally meet them, Namaari was drained. She had taken some time apart from her duties as a Chief by the healers' recommendations, knowing she could go into labor any moment now. Raya was now working for the two of them, leaving them both tired by the end of the day, not having quality time with each other. That was until Raya had it, knowing she should stay by her wife’s side to ensure she was okay, to make her company even if she spent part of the evening napping. She made a routine of preparing a warm bath for them both to soothe sore muscles. She sat behind Namaari, her hands massaging her scalp while she washed her hair. Namaari closed her eyes and relaxed into her, feeling so spoiled and pampered.
When they both were clean, they dried out and lay in their bed. Raya grabbed the oil Namaari used to apply on her skin when she wasn’t as pregnant as she was now. She spread it on her wife’s back muscles, her shoulders, and her neck; making sure every tight knot and tension dissipated under her skilled touch. When she was happy with her work, she asked Namaari to lay down. The moment her head made contact with the pillows, Raya started to massage her ankles, getting higher and higher until her fingers grazed the strong muscles of her thighs. By this point, Namaari’s eyes were almost unable to open, so relaxed she could practically melt into their bed. Raya’s hands finished her task, now coming to her wife’s belly to cradle it carefully, as it was the most fragile and precious gift she’d ever had.
Her lips pecked its extend adoringly, smiling against the warm skin when she felt Namaari laugh every time she brushed a ticklish spot. Done with the act of pure adoration, she laid her head on her wife’s chest to listen to the sound of her heart and sleepy breathing. Her hand still traced nonsensical patterns on her skin, watching in awe how their baby reacted to most of them. “I know your mae is sleepy, so I'm going to confide in you some secrets,” she murmured softly, really hoping Namaari wasn’t listening. “I’m very glad she is the one to carry you because she is the strongest person I’ve ever known. I don’t know if I’ve would be able to handle what she's going through, not to mention delivering. Please, make it easy for her” she sighed, feeling kind of stupid confessing this to a baby that probably didn’t hear her yet. “I’m scared, you know? Of not being able to be a good mother. But I know your mae is going to be the best mom in the world, she already is, so I’ll learn from her. I hope you don’t mind the many mistakes we’re going to make.” she smiled when she felt a little kick on the palm resting above Namaari’s stomach. “What scares me the most is how much I love you already. There was a time where I didn’t trust people and look at me now, loving someone I haven’t even met yet. You’re changing our lives forever, little one”.
Her heartfelt speech was just above a whisper and Namaari was quiet through it all. So when she felt long nails soothingly running along her arms, Raya almost jumped out of her skin. Namaari sensed it and paused until she spoke. “You heard everything, didn't you?” she shyly questioned. An affirmative hum was all the confirmation she needed to try to hide her face with her free hand. Her wife took her shoulder, getting her to look into her eyes. “I’m also scared, you know? but with you by my side, there’s nothing that can go wrong. Not if you can impede it” Raya leaned into the hand that softly caressed her cheek, her eyes full of understanding and warmth. “I know how you feel. This changes so many things it's actually terrifying. But we’ll be together through it all, okay?” she leaned to place a kiss on Raya’s cheekbone, causing her to smile softly. Raya nodded and lovingly kissed her lips. “ I love you, Namaari,” she whispered against them. She moved and placed another loving kiss on her wife’s baby bump. “I love you too, baby. I can’t wait to meet you” Namaari’s hands immediately pulled her down into a tight embrace, and kissed her cheek repeatedly.
“You’re going to be a great mother, Raya. You already are”. Raya held her tighter and closed her eyes, her heart swelling with pure love for this woman. Namaari adjusted herself in their embrace, knowing it was the safest space to relax and luckily, drift to sleep. That night they had the most restful sleep in months, not knowing that in a few days, the peaceful nights were coming to an end.