Chapter Text
Sunset Shimmer awoke slowly in the back of Heart-of-Gold's caravan, groaning as her eyes peeled open. She kneaded the plush cushioning beneath her, briefly comforted by its luxurious texture before coming to her senses. She was not in her own bed. Sunset's neck snapped upwards, her head spinning and swimming with all manner of thoughts as she tried to process her surroundings.
The last two days weren't a dream, it seemed. The thought washed over Sunset and smothered her mind, clouding her ability to focus. She slowly moved her head about the cabin, blinking rapidly and shielding her eyes with her... Hoof. The girl gasped in surprise, then sighed in a mix of annoyance and disappointment. The revelation of that first morning had lost its novelty surprisingly quickly, given the circumstance. Sunset shifted uncomfortably in her new body, spreading her four legs and laying flat on her stomach. It was strange, she thought, that her outstretched body just barely reached the edge of the seat. Heart-of-Gold must have been larger than she remembered, or perhaps Sunset herself was smaller than she thought.
The caravan was empty save for the large seats and a lantern near the ceiling, which Sunset took note of for being particularly high up. The unicorn hopped down awkwardly from the seats, her eye level barely above the edge of the seats. "That's gonna take a lot of getting used to..." She grumbled to herself, before pushing open the door to the outside.
"AHH!" She shrieked, upon seeing a massive grey wolf directly besides the door.
"What?" James barked in response, rising to his feet with a paw on his sword's hilt. His eyes scanned the scene attentively, darting to the inside of the caravan and drifting across the rest of the street.
"I... Whew... J-Jim, right?" Sunset asks, sticking out her hoof to shake. "I forgot about you... Hah, yesterday is still very fuzzy, I didn't get any sleep."
"James, ma'am." He corrected with a polite bow, before sitting back on the ground. "Heart-of-Gold insisted you have the caravan to yourself to sleep in, I elected to keep watch while the rest discussed their plan in the inn." He says, nodding to the building the caravan was parked by.
"Right, sorry. Sunset." The pony nods, slowly putting her hoof down and awkwardly stumbling to the ground. She tried to remember the advice Tiny had given her, but it didn't come naturally. "What plan are they discussing?" She asks, tilting her head curiously.
"The plan to get you home." James said with a gentle nod, crossing his legs and putting his paws on his knees. Sunset's face beamed at this information, sitting in front of the wolf excitedly.
"Thank you guys so much! This is... This is a really weird experience, if I'm being honest... I'm a horse, and there's talking dogs and robots and whatever Tiny is..." Sunset tilted her head side-to-side slowly, rolling her eyes at the oddity of the situation she found herself in.
"I'm a raiju." James said again with another simple nod, "And the one calling himself Tiny is a breezie. I've seen his kind only once before, very rare..."
"A raiju? Like a Stercket?" Sunset asked, a gleam of familiarity and excitement shining in her eyes. James' confusion was visible on her face, prompting her to continue. "Monster in Your Pocket!" Sunset saw the brief look of abject horror on James' face, and thought it best to elaborate as quickly as she could. "It's a game I play back home! You collect all these monsters and you uh, put them in little cubes and keep them in your pocket... And they shortened Monster to 'Ster' and... It's not important..."
The child cleared her throat loudly and looked down at the ground, her face red with embarrassment. "Video games don't exist in this world, do they?" She asked sheepishly, her eyes rolling up to meet James'.
The raiju shook his head slowly, brow still furrowed in a degree of confusion. "Er, I cannot say I know of them, but the world is large and I've yet to see it all. I was never much for games, at any rate." James grunts and rolls to his feet, standing up and holding out a paw. "Come, let's see what the others are discussing and get you breakfast."
Sunset smiled and nodded, using her friend's arm for support as she stood. "Tiny's gonna have to teach me to walk again, four legs are too many to keep track of..."
Rounding the corner, James and Sunset saw Bruno and Heart-of-Gold leaning against the side of the building. They sat awkwardly under the awning, too large to fit through the doorway. Perhaps it had been her fatigue yesterday or her sense of wonder that distracted her, but it was dawning on Sunset how truly massive these two were.
"Good morrow, Sunset!" The minotaur says, raising a hand in greeting. "Heart-of-Gold hopes your sleep was restful."
"Yeah..." Sunset said quietly, stumbling up the steps of the stairs to the inn. Her joints hurt, hinting to her that she wasn't walking correctly. "I have a weird question for you guys." She said, looking to Heart-of-Gold and then Bruno. "How tall would you say I am?" Her curiosity regarding her new form was immense, and Sunset resolved to figure out some answers before continuing on her journey.
"Almost precisely one meter tall." Bruno said with no hesitation, "From ground to top of the skull."
Sunset blinked and put a hoof to her chin. "That's uh... Like, three and a half feet, right?" She asks.
"Feet?" Heart-of-Gold asks with a snort. "Who measures with their feet?" The minotaur put her hands out and closed one eye, seeming to measure Sunset from a distance. "You are... Roughly four hands tall. But Heart-of-Gold has large hands, you're probably more like eight to ten hands..."
Sunset lowered her ears in annoyance. The sensation was odd in its simultaneous feelings of natural and unnatural. "That doesn't help..." Sunset grumbled to herself, but it did allow her to draw the conclusion that she was in fact shorter than she had once been.
Through an open window, Tracker pushed his head and grinned to greet the others. "There's the sleepyhead! You still wigging out, kid?" The cat asks, flicking his ears and resting his elbows on the sill. "We were just stocking up and makin' a plan of action!" He hissed excitedly.
"We've decided that Equestria is the best destination for us." Heart-of-Gold says, folding her arms. "None of the party have any idea how to reach another world, but Heart-of-Gold does know where ponies come from."
"But I'm not a pony! I've just been turned into one!" Sunset insisted, stamping a back hoof in frustration.
"Perhaps it would be easier to devise a course of action if you were to elaborate on your situation." Bruno said, narrowing his eyes.
"And after that, maybe you can tell us more about your problem?" Tracker said, oblivious to his companion's words. "That way we can make a plan easier!"
"You're not good with long words," James sneered, "Are you?"
Tracker shook his head with a smile, seeming almost proud of that fact. Tiny buzzed through the window above Tracker's head, before gliding the rest of the way to Heart-of-Gold's head. He perches gently in her mane, holding what appeared to be a bottlecap full of juice. "Hey big Goldie!" He squeaks with a chuckle. "They don't charge for capfuls here!"
The minotaur chuckles and holds up a finger. "Hello small Goldie. If that is the case, then Heart-of-Gold doesn't mind being charged double for her roughage..." She said with a hint of annoyance that belied her words.
"Well, everycreature's here, so let's hear the story!" Tracker says, clapping his paws and practically hanging out of the window to listen to Sunset. The little pony gulped, looking up at the looming assortment of creatures peering down at her. The situation struck her as awkward, and she had trouble talking to so many strangers at once.
"Alright..." Sunset said, unsure of how to approach a situation of such gravitas. "Well, it all began to nights ago... I was laying in bed, and I'm pretty sure I was asleep. Then my door opened and uh..." She paused, walking over to Heart-of-Gold and sitting beside her. "There was another ME in the doorway... Like a clone, or an evil twin or something..."
"Ooh, if I had a twin, I'd start a bluegrass band." Tracker says, putting his paws on his cheeks and smiling.
"EVIL twin." Tiny says, raising an eyebrow.
"EVIL bluegrass music." Tracker replies in a confident tone.
"It looked EXACTLY like you?" Heart-of-Gold asked, putting a hand to her chin.
"Yes, I think so... It was dark." Sunset admitted. "But she had my hair, my eyes, everything. I think she was wearing my jacket... Then she ran to my bed and I woke up... Here." Sunset shuddered at the memory. Now that her mind was no longer clouded with surprise, the encounter seemed terrifying in hindsight.
"It sounds like a classic changeling attack, but I don't know why they wouldn't cocoon her..." Tiny said, sipping on his bottlecap of juice.
"Maybe she teleported by accident, like how she zapped me when she was mad." Tracker said, pointing a thumb to the hairless blotch on his back.
"That's a possibility." James nodded, leaning against the beams of the "If changelings are attacking Eques-- Er, Earth, perhaps it isn't safe to take Sunset back..."
"Perhaps we should discuss this in private." Bruno stated, rolling forward to avoid the roof of the awning as he stood. The others all nodded in silent agreement and stood with him.
"Why? What's a changeling? Why isn't it safe?" Sunset's voice began to warble with fear, her eyes wide as she trotted after the adults.
"In the caravan, we'll explain more." Heart-of-Gold says, turning the corner.
"How can we be sure one of US isn't a changeling?" James said, blinking and turning his eyes to each of the group.
"We're not even sure that's what this is," says Tracker, "But I've got an idea, if we wanna be super certain..." The group clambered into the caravan, Sunset and Tracker sitting next to one another and Heart-of-Gold sitting next to James across from them. Tiny remained perched in her mane, and Bruno sat in the open door. His eyes scanned the inside curiously. The automaton seeming surprised that the space could actually fit him, however slightly.
"Bruno's got this anti-magic engine." Tracker explained to the group. "It makes him totally immune to just about every spell. I mean, we're not exactly shaking paws with wizards every day, but I've seen it work once or twice." He leaned forward and looked to Bruno. "You thinking what I'm thinking, old buddy?"
Bruno nodded, "If you think it is worth it, Tracker."
Tracker nodded and furrowed his brow, swiping his hand as a sort of signal to Bruno. Suddenly, the air around the group began to change. A pulsing, almost imperceptible wave emanated from Bruno, humming in muted deep tones. Sunset watched as the world around her changed in subtle but jarring ways. The creatures besides her seemed to grow more animalistic, though their features did not change. It was as if the social cues and expressions of their faces had disappeared, leaving only the inhumanity of their alien features. Tiny and Sunset both began to shiver, though the breezie seemed far more affected than her. Then, as suddenly as it had began, the world returned to normal. The group took deep breaths that they didn't know they had been holding, save Tracker.
"We call it the RAD." Tracker continued, grinning at acronym and making a childish 'shaka' gesture with his paws.
"The Reality Anchor Device." Bruno elaborates, "A field of pure antimagic. It can dispel even the strongest magical forces. It drains my energy reserves greatly, or else I would have it active constantly." Two of Bruno's three eyes drift towards Tiny as Sunset, as if threatening them. "If one of us were a changeling, my Anchor would have dispelled their disguise."
Tiny breathes deeply, clutching Heart-of-Gold's ear. "And... How do we know Bruno isn't a changeling?" He asks, eyeing the robot with a harsh glare.
"That was NOT changeling magic." Heart-of-Gold said, her face full of awe and worry. "That was... Incredible..."
"Eeyup!" Tracker says, cracking his knuckles. "Bruno's kind of the best..."
"Will someone please tell me what this all means? What's a changeling?" Sunset asked again, "A shapeshifter? A body snatcher?"
All eyes turned to Sunset, telling her that what she said was unusual. "It's a bit of both..." Tiny said, blinking in surprise, "You've never heard of them in Earth?"
"ON Earth." Sunset corrected, holding up a hoof, "And no, never. ALL of this is new to me, we don't have ANY talking animals on Earth except humans..."
"Fascinating..." James said quietly, "I couldn't imagine such an insular world. Perhaps changeling magic is what polymorphed you into an Equestrian in the first place."
"If that were the case, my Reality Anchor would have dispelled the effect." Bruno said, his eyes drifting across the caravan in an unsettling manner as his attention split.
"Changelings are a scourge on our world." Tiny continued, perched authoritatively on Heart-of-Gold's head. "They travel in swarms across the land until they find unsuspecting settlements, and send packs to research and infiltrate them. When they have enough creatures abducted and replaced, they call their queen and take over, then return to their hive. It's one of the reasons the Breezie Alliance keeps the Veil up. It hides our home from threats like that."
"It was Princess Celestia's duty to slay Chrysalis," Heart-of-Gold scoffed, "but all the old fool did was encourage the changelings to use guerilla tactics... Now instead of waging war, fighting them is like pulling weeds and teeth." The minotaur leans back and snorts, crossing her thick arms.
"... Princess Celestia?" Sunset asked, tilting her head to the side. "Huh... Who's that?" She narrowed her eyes curiously. Her new principal was supposed to be named Celestia, but there couldn't be a connection...
"The ruler of Equestria!" Tiny yelped, raising a hoof. He seemed surprised that Sunset didn't know that. "She's a thousand years old, EVERY breezie knows her!"
"She is also a soft and ineffective ruler." Heart-of-Gold sneers. "She hasn't waged war in centuries, her last attendance of the Convocation was before the dynasty of Font-of-Rage and Peace-of-Mind!"
"Her parents." James said quietly to the rest of the group.
Sunset's head began to spin with all of this information. She began to stamp the floor with a hoof and whined. "Slow down, slow down!" She says, shutting her eyes tightly. "How long do people LIVE on this planet? Centuries? A thousand years?"
Tracker laughs, slapping his knee, "Ohhh no no. normal people live a few decades if they're lucky. Maybe two or three if you end up getting eaten by a dragon or roc. The royalty get to live forever." He sneered and spat the last words, leaning forward and glaring at Heart-of-Gold. She silently rebutted with her own steely, indomitable gaze.
James' paw instinctively reached for his sword, and Bruno's for his hammer. "Let us allow cooler heads to prevail..." The raiju said through clenched teeth. "We have bigger problems to face, and a possible changeling coup to stop..."
"Agreed." Bruno said, though no creature lessened their gaze or took a limb away from their weapons.
Sunset sat in the middle of the room, unsure of how to react to a tense situation like this. She gulped nervously, a wave of relief washing over her as Tiny took charge.
"Now..." The little breezie said calmly, putting his forelegs up and waving them down slowly. "Let's talk about Sunset's problem. That's the whole reason we're here, right?" Every creature nodded in agreement, slowly reclining in their seats.
"W-What are these changelings going to do to Earth?" Sunset asked, looking up at the little creature.
Tiny sighed heavily, clearly dreading telling Sunset the answer. "Well, generally they begin replacing individuals. I suppose that would be you. They research your personality, watch you from afar, and slip into your life. Normally they would abduct you and take you to a hive, but something must have gone wrong. The other Sunset is probably impersonating you right now and reporting all of their findings to the hive. Changelings feed on love, and tend to come out during celebrations and major events. Royal weddings, holidays, celebrations. Is anything like that happening on Earth?" Tiny hopped off of Heart-of-Gold's head and drifted down to the floor, his tiny hooves clicking against the wood. He looked up at Sunset with a serious expression that made her uneasy.
"The... The first day of school would have been yesterday..." Sunset said, putting a hoof on her temple. "There's gonna be hundreds of students at Canterlot High... And this time of year there's tons of holidays. Halloween, Thanksgiving... The Fall Formal!" Sunset gasped. "Oh no, that must be it! The high school will be jam-packed with students, they're gonna announce a prom king and queen. FLASH!" The unicorn screamed, her head darting to each of the group. "M-My boyfriend! We were gonna be prom king and queen! We promised each other!" She shrieked. "They're gonna eat him!"
"Not eat him." Said James, "But they will drain him of his love. This 'Fall Formal' sounds like just the event a changeling invasion would take place at."
"A situation most dire... Heart-of-Gold will send for help posthaste." The minotaur said in a grave tone. "Minos is eager to do battle with an enemy, and the head of Queen Chrysalis would be an irresistible trophy for our army." She slammed her fist into her open palm with a light smirk, seeming eager to do battle herself.
"I wish only that I could offer similar aide." James bowed his head, "Yet the raiju remain divided in a civil war at this very moment. I stand alone at Heart-of-Gold's side."
"Bruno and I are a one-cat army!" Tracker said, putting his paws behind his head and clicking his tongue. "One taste of his Reality Anchor and Queen Chrysalis will be a stain on the wall, just watch us."
Sunset looked down at Tiny, gulping to relieve the dry sting of anxiety in her throat. "What can the breezies do?"
Tiny fell silent, his cheeks flushing with a crimson coat of embarrassment. "I'm not exactly sure the other breezies would be happy to see me, much less risk life and limb to fight an enemy that could crush us... But I promise I'll help where I can."
Sunset smiles down at him, nodding. "Thanks... We're no space marines, but I think with you guys, I could take down an alien queen."
An air of stunning silence permeated the caravan, Sunset clearing her throat and looking at the floor. "Right... Probably not a lot of sci-fi movies on this planet either..."
"Just don't ask her about her video games..." James whispered quietly to Heart-of-Gold.
Sunset and the rest of the group hopped out of the cart as Heart-of-Gold wrote a letter to her parents. Sunset looked up at Tracker and then James, her body full of energy that she felt the need to use. "So uh, you guys are seriously gonna help me take down an alien invasion?" She asked, her head turning from one to the other.
"There's that word again, alien." Tracker said, rubbing his nose with a thumb. "What in Abyssinia does that mean?"
"It means strange, foreign, unknown." James explained, "An apt descriptor for a changeling coup." He turned his attention to Sunset, "And yes, I would fight side-by-side with Heart-of-Gold to the death. If that means facing a horde of changelings, then so be it. As well, it would be an honor to liberate this 'Earth' and free your people." He smiles confidently, which gave Sunset some courage for the first time in the last few days.
"I don't really know why, but I've taken a kind of liking to ya, kid." Tracker responded in kind, crossing his arms and walking to the edge of the street with Sunset. "It feels nice to help somecreature for a change, and it'll feel good to break some heads! Get all that tension out of my shoulders." Tracker hopped and widened his stance, huffing and punching in the air as is he were in a fistfight. Sunset couldn't help but laugh, hiding her smile with a hoof and wagging her tail.
"Haha! Thanks Tracker..." She said, her voice trailing off. Sunset then looked up at Bruno, barely able to open her mouth before he spoke.
"Where Tracker goes, I go." He said in a stern but emotionless tone. Sunset slowly shut her mouth again, nodding in affirmation.
"You seem to know a lot about changelings." James said, tilting his head and looking to the breezie perched atop Sunset's head. "Why is that?"
Tiny scrunches his nose, looking away to avoid the raiju's gaze. "The breezies are an... Insular people. Paranoid, even. We live apart from the world, and are told all manner of stories about the outside. It's part of the reason I left. I wanted to see what this place was like without all the fearmongering."
"And you ended up in a cage." Tracker said solemnly, holding his elbows awkwardly.
"Yeah." Tiny responded curtly, falling silent and nestling into Sunset's mane.
"Well... What do you guys wanna do while Heart-of-Gold gets in touch with Minos?" Sunset asks, eager to break the awkward emotions that had overcome the group.
"Accrue solar energy to replenish my battery." Bruno said, as if it were a simple chore.
Tracker pointed at himself with a pair of thumbs. "I was gonna replenish my tummy with a nice hot meal! Think there's any restaurants nearby we could dine and dash at?" He asks, stroking his chin and sweeping the street with his eyes.
A sheathed sword quickly met his nose as James barked at him. "We will do nothing of the sort! You will pay for your meals like an honest creature while under my watch, Abyssinian..." Bruno reached down, grabbing James' sword in one hand and snapping it in two with his fingers. He allows the pieces to drop to the ground in silence, a big grin spreading across Tracker's face.
"Can we PLEASE go a few minutes without fighting?" Tiny whimpers, hugging the top of Sunset's scalp.
"Can you PLEASE get out of my hair? Literally?" The unicorn asks, trying to push Tiny off with her hoof.
"It's safest here! Breezie wings are sensitive to the wind. It's sort of in the name... One strong gust and suddenly I'm two blocks away." He huffs in response.
"You can be MY hat!" Tracker says, clapping his paws, "I've always wanted a hat! They're a terrible thing to steal though, you can't really wear them 'cause then they'll see you in the street with the goods right on your head! Defeats the WHOLE purpose..."
James growled angrily and sneered at Tracker as he picked up the warped and snapped pieces of his sword, watching Tiny buzz over to the Abyssinian's head and perch atop it. "Like this?" the breezie asks, nestling across Tracker's head and spreading his four legs across the sides of the cat's head.
"Yes!" Tracker meows, wiggling his fingers in excitement. "Oh oh oh, can you put down your wings like little sunglasses?" He asks excitedly. Tiny and Sunset began to laugh and giggle at the display, the breezie's wings curling down to cover Tracker's eyes. Even James chuckled at the display, holding the bridge of his nose and shaking his head slowly.
"Let's get lunch already, the three of you are clearly delirious..." He said, chuckling quietly to himself as he walked to the door of the caravan.
"Tracker is always delirious." Bruno said, following behind James.
"It's true, I am!" Tracker affirmed proudly, pointing a thumb at himself.
Sunset tapped her hooves on the ground happily, glad to be getting food and seeing her friends getting along. "Do you think anyplace here serves bacon burgers? Those are my favorite!" She says, trotting to the street and looking both ways.
The cat beside her snapped his fingers and grinned. "I LOVE the way you think, Sunset Shimmer. Or more accurately, the way your stomach thinks." Tracker says, drumming on his own slim midriff.
"Heart-of-Gold will not be joining us for lunch." James said as he shut the door to the caravan, a backpack slung along his back. "She says that she will be too busy writing her letter and finding a postal office."
"BORING!" Tracker yowls loudly, bouncing on his toes. "Let's go get some grub already! I'm starving!"
"Tracker always claims to be starving..." Bruno said quietly, his eyes narrowing at his feline friend.
"Hmph! Well you can just wait here and soak up the sunshine then." Tracker says, turning up his nose and causing Tiny to yelp and grip his scalp. "You probably won't fit in any of the buildings anyway."
Bruno nodded, unfazed by Tracker's indignant response. He sat on the ground with a thud and slumped against the Speedy, his three eyes dimming in what Sunset assumed to be some sort of 'sleep mode'. "Well, if we're all set." James said, plodding down the street with his three friends in tow.
The day dragged by and the sun dipped in the sky by the time the four returned to the inn, a loud thudding coming from the alley where their caravan was. "Weeten der Feothan?" Tiny blurted out in his native tongue, the rest of the group taking it to be an exclamation of surprise.
James growled, his eyes narrowing at Tracker. "It sounds like trouble... Perhaps if I had my SWORD..."
"You've been attacking me all day! I do NOT approve, dog boy..." The Abyssinian hisses, his back's fur rising.
Sunset rolled her eyes and trotted forward. The day had been filled with long bouts of awkward silence intermittent with boring conversation and petty squabbles between Tracker and James. It reminded Sunset why she had never tried to make many friends on Earth, people were often disappointing and annoying in long doses. The little pony scoffed and giggled as she passed the caravan and witness the source of the commotion, waving the others over with a hoof. "Hey guys! Come over here..."
A loud slam accompanied Heart-of-Gold's hand slamming into a table, Bruno's wrapped tightly around it. "Again." she barked sternly, cracking her knuckles and planting her elbow in the center. Bruno was silent, raising his arm and slapping her hand into the wood with visible ease. Heart-of-Gold growls and raises her arm again. "That one doesn't count! You did not hold Heart-of-Gold's hand!"
"I fail to see the relevance." Bruno said. "We have ample data to draw the conclusion that I am stronger than you."
"IMPOSSIBLE!" Heart-of-Gold roars, "Heart-of-Gold has rippling, beautiful muscles! You have dumpy log-like limbs! And your jumpsuit is unflattering! Again!" Heart-of-Gold slammed her elbow into the table, her face softening as she saw Sunset. "Oh, hello little pony!" She chirps, before another slam rang through the air. "TRACKER!" The minotaur's face contorted in rage once again, "Tell your golem to stop cheating!"
Tracker laughed and slapped his own forehead, curling forward and closing his eyes. "BAHHH-HA-HA! Ohh, he's not MY golem, Goldie! 'Cheating', that's great! This chick's a riot... Bruno is as straight edge as it gets, he gives wolf-boy over here a run for his money!" Tracker hisses through his chuckles.
"Now Tracker, remember what we said about mean names?" Tiny says, giving a tired smile and putting his hooves together. Sunset rolled her eyes and grumbled. Tiny had been trying to help the other three get along all day, to no success. Sunset thought he sounded like a dispenser for fortune cookie wisdom, or an annoying tutorial sprite from 'Elf Rule Warriors'.
"Have you been sitting here arm wrestling all day?" Sunset asks, yawning and snapping her tail. Socializing had left her mentally drained, and she was eager to go to bed. Her food had tasted strange, which she attributed to having a horse tongue, and there was little else to do in town, which had left her bored out of her mind.
"Not ALL day. Heart-of-Gold sent a letter to Minos." The minotaur said defiantly. "We need to stay in town until we receive a reply, or else the royal stork won't be able to find us."
Tiny asked, cocking his head to the left. "... Minotaurs send their letters by stork?"
"Of course!" Heart-of-Gold proclaimed, as if it was obvious. "How do breezies send mail?"
"We er, don't. Eversummer is pretty small, we can catch a breeze to wherever we need and deliver news by mouth." He said, wrinkling his nose.
"Yeah yeah... I'm gonna go to bed..." Sunset yawns, opening the door to the caravan with both of her hooves and crawling inside. "Thanks for everything today, guys..."
"Of course! It was Heart-of-Gold's pleasure!" Heart-of-Gold nodded with a smile.
"And mine." Tiny said with a little bow.
"We will see you in the morning." James said to Sunset, though she hoped that wasn't true. Part of her still stubbornly refused to admit that this was real, and expected the comforting reality of her suburban home to greet her upon awakening. As she curled up on the cushioned seat, a large white hand passed a blanket and pillow through the window.
"Bedding?" Heart-of-Gold asked, shaking the fabric enticingly.
"Uh... Thanks." Sunset said, grabbing the items in her forelegs and trying to pull them over herself without hands. She scoffed and left the blanket draped over herself haphazardly, burying her face in the pillow and hoping Heart-of-Gold's letter came soon...
Heart-of-Gold peered over the top of the caravan with a scowl at the three men in her company. They looked back sheepishly, especially James. The minotaur plodded around the caravan and put her hands on her hips. "What did you three do?" She hisses in a whisper, so as to not disturb Sunset Shimmer.
"We... Got lunch?" Tracker mewls suspiciously, his ears lowering.
"Sunset seems even more miserable than yesterday. Heart-of-Gold put her in your charge, James!" Heart-of-Gold huffed, the raiju shrinking into himself and holding his paws together.
"Y-Yes ma'am." He said with a quiet cough, "But it was all I could do to keep the Abyssinian in line."
"In line!?" Tracker hisses, grabbing the back of James' neck. "Listen here, FIDO."
"Guys!" Tiny barks, putting his small hooves between Tracker and James, "Little filly? Sleeping? How about we talk about this someplace else? Maybe over dinner?"
Heart-of-Gold leaned towards the caravan and knocked gently on the door with one knuckle. "Sunset, dear? Do you want to come have dinner with us?" She asked in a gentle tone.
"No." Was the sharp reply from the inside of the caravan.
Heart-of-Gold's face contorted into a look of pure rage. Her brow furrowed into a valley of muscular lines and her jaw clenched until her teeth began to creak. With a pair of sudden smacks, her hands were around James' and Tracker's throats, lifting the pair up. She pulled their ears close to her muzzle and growled. "You two... Will explain in great detail to Heart-of-Gold... Why that little girl is so upset as to refuse her hospitality..."
Both men looked utterly terrified, though James' eyes reflected a fear borne of experience. "Y-Yes ma'am." He chokes out, "I know how you get when creatures refuse your hospitality."
"Yes." Heart-of-Gold replies curtly, stomping down the alleyway. "Heart-of-Gold will pay for dinner. That's alright by the three of you, yes?" She asks.
Tiny, Tracker, and James all nodded enthusiastically, stuttering out a frightened "Yes ma'am!" in unison.
Tracker gripped the edges of Heart-of-Gold's large fingers and chuckles, looking over her shoulder. "Hey Bruno! Mind looking after Sunset for us while we're gone? Since you're not one for dinner, anyway..."
Bruno nodded quietly, sitting on the Speedy and keeping one eye trained on the caravan. He watched as the four left and turned his full attention to the caravan, switching his mode of vision to view Sunset's magical resonance.
He could see the pony crawling towards the window, opening it with her hooves awkwardly. Her body appeared as a shimmering yellow-orange outline on his sensors, various warnings and readings appearing around his vision that he was forced to ignore at Tracker's request.
"You are not to leave." Bruno said, his tone deep and commanding.
"I'm not, I'm trying to talk to you." Sunset growled, leaning out of the window and draping her upper half along the sill. Bruno could see her outline flash and darken, more warnings flashing across his vision.
"Speak." He commanded, standing and taking a stance next to the caravan.
Sunset growled again and glared up at Bruno's eyes. Bruno glared back, though his body language was difficult to read. "You really seem to hate me." She hissed. "What's up with that?" She asked.
"You are a 2nd Degree Metaphysical Hazard to health, safety, and spacetime cohesion." Bruno replied, his voice devoid of empathy. Sunset's face furrowed in a moment of processing, before her eyes lit up.
"Spacetime cohesion? It's not my fault I was sent to this world... I'm not gonna rip open a wormhole, am I?" She hopped out of the window, looking up at Bruno.
Bruno's eyes widened in surprise, the massive automaton squatting to inspect Sunset closer. "... You know what these words mean?" He asked, hands on his knees.
"Well, I know what spacetime cohesion is, sort of... Is 2nd Degree worse than 1st Degree on your chart? Because if not, then I think you're overreacting..." Sunset said, waving her hoof casually.
"... 2nd Degree is the 2nd highest degree. It denotes the capability for massive-scale reality restructure and degradation of physical law." Bruno explained, "It has been years since I have met somecreature... Somebody who understood those words."
Sunset chuckles, "Yeah... Where I come from, that stuff is all science-fiction. Creepypasta, video games, stuff I usually get laughed at for obsessing over." Sunset sat down with a huff, "But... Tiny said I COULD use magic, with a little training... And massive-scale reality restructure sounds cool!" She chirps. Bruno's eyes began to glow a bright red, causing Sunset to scoot back a bit. "O-Or not! Not cool! I know you uh, have this big THING about magic..."
Bruno's eyes slowly return to a normal yellow-white, though they now held a suspicious glare. He slowly stood up, towering over Sunset. "I possess a directive to dispel and erase dangerous metaphysical hazards of the 3rd Degree or higher. Those of the 4th Degree or lower are to be sent to the Pachydermatous Institution of Metaphysical Study."
"Woah... That sounds awesome..." Sunset said, her eyes wide with wonder. Standing before her was a creature right out of a science fiction movie. "Do you think they could find a way to send me home? I mean... If I got sent here, I can be sent back, right?"
"The PIMS no longer exist. Nor does Pachyderma." Bruno said. "In that event, all Metaphysical Hazards are to be neutralized, regardless of Degree."
Sunset gulps and lifts her forelimbs defensively. "H-Hah, oh boy... That's right, your homeworld was destroyed... Lemme guess, it was a giant magic explosion and you hold a huge grudge, but Tracker's the one thing stopping you from wrecking me totally?"
Bruno's eyes narrowed once again, the creature sitting on the ground and leaning forward. "You possess a degree of skill for situational assessment... Though not an acute one."
Sunset huffs, planting her forehooves on the ground with a frown. "Thanks." She said sarcastically. "I'll have you know I barely remember yesterday, I was sleep deprived. What if I promise not to use magic? I've never even used it before in my ENTIRE life... Humans don't have any, Earth doesn't have any either. It's like, a myth, a story we tell little kids."
"A promise?" Bruno asked, holding out a hand. "You volunteer a directive to refrain from all uses of magic?"
"Unless TOTALLY necessary." Sunset says, grabbing his hand with her hoof. She gulped nervously, her entire foreleg was about the size of one of his fingers. "I hereby posit a directive to refrain from all uses of magic, excepting situations where doing so would cause harm to others." She says with a smile.
Bruno's eyes widened and flickered in surprise. "Your vocabulary is... Surprisingly extensive... And your verbiage is precise. This is a welcome change." He said, his tone softening.
Sunset giggled in response and put her hooves to her mouth. "Hehe, thanks! You'd be surprised, I get that a lot. Blame my parents." She says. "I'm actually a grade ahead, I'm not even supposed to be going to high school yet..."
"Perhaps... You could explain to me what that is." Bruno said. "In return, I will explain to you the structure of Pachyderma's society..."
Sunset smiled warmly, lifting her head up. "Trade stories about our homeworlds? I'd love to..." She said, "Hehe, I haven't started high school yet, but here's the general idea..."
Heart-of-Gold ushered the three boys into the restaurant, a stern look on her face. The short parrot at the head of the restaurant let out a long sigh, looking to them all in succession and giving a big frown. "You again... I see you brought a friend..." He said flatly.
"Heart-of-Gold has come to humbly apologize on behalf of her friends." The princess said, craning her neck down to avoid hitting her head on the ceiling. "She is aware they caused a scene earlier in the day, and wishes to make things right by displaying PROPER table manners to them. Is outside seating an option?" The parrot took a deep breath in response, seeming hesitant to accept Heart-of-Gold's offer. This infuriated the minotaur. It was one thing to bring question upon her own reputation, but for her friends to have acted so poorly as to ruin her own reputation by mere association? This was unacceptable. "Apologize to the staff." Heart-of-Gold growls through clenched teeth, putting a muscled hand on James' head.
"I-I apologize deeply, good sir." James gulped, putting his hands together and bowing lightly. "I was belligerent and curt, this was not my original intention. I merely wished to accommodate the child in my charge..." James looked up sheepishly at Heart-of-Gold. "I may have... Yelled at them when they would not make Sunset's meal the way she wanted... In hindsight, even I am not sure how to make a fry 'curly'... B-But Tracker had me on edge!" The raiju barks.
A loud smack rang through the air as Heart-of-Gold flicked the back of James' head, her hand moving to Tracker as she picked up the lanky cat by the scalp. Tracker crosses his arms and huffs. "I'm not saying sorry! I was doing these guys a favor! Garbagemen get PAID to do what I was gonna do for FREE!"
"What did you do?" Heart-of-Gold growls.
"He tried to steal their trash can..." Tiny said, clicking his hooves together, smiling nervously.
"I OFFERED to take their GARBAGE for free! They're not using it!" Tracker whines, wiggling his paws in the air just above the floor.
Heart-of-Gold growls, before her ears flicked and her face softened. She leans down and asked the bird in a sweet tone, "Pardon, dear bird, where are Heart-of-Gold's manners? What is your name?"
"Yalungur, ma'am." The parrot squawked meekly, "I uh, can arrange some outside seating, this really isn't necessary." He said, grabbing some menus for the four.
"Apologize to Yalungur!" Heart-of-Gold growls, shaking Tracker by the head.
"ACH! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I was just performing my civic duty!" Tracker yowls, dropping to the floor and rubbing his head tenderly.
"I ALREADY APOLOGIZED!" Tiny blurted out in as loud a voice as he could muster, hiding behind Tracker and peering out at Heart-of-Gold.
"He did! In three languages!" Yalungur squawks, "And w-we accept all of your apologies, ma'am, that's uhm, very kind of you." The parrot ran a hand through the feathers on his head. "Now erm, why don't I seat you outside... Please."
Heart-of-Gold snorts and crosses her arms with a smirk. "Excellent! Heart-of-Gold is pleased that she has made amends with the common folk. Come, let us feast!" She says, turning to lumber towards the patio seats.
"Finally. Feast is like, one of my favorite words..." Tracker meows, rubbing his paws together.
Tracker, Heart-of-Gold, and James sat around the table, Tiny perching in the center and reading the back of James' menu. Tracker leaned back and put his paws behind his head, closing one eye and looking to Heart-of-Gold. "So," He began with a smirk. "This is all on your dime, huh Goldie?"
James growled and bared his teeth, only to be met with the snapping of Heart-of-Gold's fingers. "Yes. This will be paid for by the royal family of Minos." She lowered her menu and looked to James with a light glare. "Tracker is rough and dishonorable, yes. Growling, however, is very impolite at the dinner table."
The raiju hid behind his menu, grumbling to himself. "Yes ma'am..."
"I'll take a big ol' buttered salmon then!" Tracker said, throwing his paws up in the air with a grin.
"They don't serve buttered salmon here." James said contemptuously.
"They don't serve curly fries here either," Tracker sneered, putting his paws on the table. "but that didn't stop you going all 'papa bear' on Sunset and the waiters."
"Papa bear?" James scoffed and reared back, raising an eyebrow in surprise and offense.
"How about we pick something from the menu, Tracker?" Tiny asked calmly, patting the laminated paper with his hoof.
"Sure, any fish in there?" He asks.
"Why don't you READ it and find out?" James asks, drumming his claws on the table and snapping his head to Heart-of-Gold. "He's been like this all day, insisting we do things for him. He seemed to have forgotten it was Sunset we were supposed to be treating."
"As did you." Heart-of-Gold said with a huff, "Or else she would be joining us for dinner. Yet, you are correct." Heart-of-Gold turned to Tracker, "Surely you can order something for yourself?"
Tracker lowers his ears and picks up the menu, "Yeah, yeah! Sure..." He clears his throat, before beckoning Tiny over with a finger. "Say uh, why don't you read it with me, Tiny? Since you can't pick them up yourself."
"Oh! That's nice of you, Tracker." Tiny beams, trotting over to sit in front of the Abyssinian.
"Help." Tracker hisses in a whisper to the breezie, hiding his face with the menu. "I can't read this."
Tiny blinked, caught off guard by the sudden words. "What?" He asked, turning to meet a claw in his face.
"Shh! Don't tell James, he'll make fun of me." Tracker whines, "I... Can't read." He cleared his throat, wrinkling his nose awkwardly.
"Oh... That explains a lot." Tiny said, putting a hoof to his chin. "I've got an idea." The breezie hopped up onto Tracker's shoulder and sat on his haunches. "Wow, Heart-of-Gold. You're sure you're okay with footing the whole bill? Tracker and I would really hate to take advantage of you like that."
"We would?" Tracker asked, his face contorted with surprise and a hint of disgust.
"Well it puts us in a sort of position. We'd hate to order something expensive, like the roasted lamb right THERE..." Tiny said, pointing to a spot on the menu. "But it would be rude to order table scraps like the beef strips THERE." He said, pointing to another spot. "It would imply that Heart-of-Gold isn't prepared for that kind of favor."
The minotaur huffs quietly. "Heart-of-Gold would not feel taken advantage of. This is an apology dinner, to show the staff that we are well behaved creatures. We will order something that is convenient for them to prepare. And preferably not made of beef..."
"Well then, maybe Tracker and James should decide on their meal together?" Tiny asks with a shrug. "They are the only carnivores here, after all. You and I can decide on a course, too. In all honesty, I'll likely be eating scraps anyway, tiny stomach and all." The breezie said, perching on Heart-of-Gold's shoulder.
"That is a lovely idea." Heart-of-Gold nodded. "Do you enjoy croutons?" She asked.
"I'm more of a 'crumbs' kind of guy, heh..." Tiny said, rubbing the back of his head.
"Tiny is correct." James said, taking a deep breath. "In the interest of camaraderie and bonding, we shall share a meal together."
"Right, right... After all, it's polite to take a cat out to dinner before you--"
"TRACKER!" Tiny barks, stamping a hoof on Heart-of-Gold's shoulder and glaring daggers at the Abyssinian.
"B-Before you... Can call him your best friend!" Tracker grins, "What sounds good to you, buddy?"
"I've been harsh and snappy with you all day, new friend." James said, his voice dripping with the same saccharine tone that Tracker's did. "I insist you make the choice."
"Well in that case, do you like lamb?" Tracker asks, licking his lips.
"Because I'm a wolf?" James sneered, slamming his menu into the table.
"Because lamb is GOOD." Tracker says with a grin, slamming his menu down as well. His tone made it clear he was oblivious to what he had said. "Oh oh, and since we're sharing, it doesn't matter that it's expensive, right? We can split it!"
"Heart-of-Gold is paying." James said, crossing his arms.
"Then SHE can split it!" Tracker mewls, wagging his tail and looking up at the minotaur expectantly.
"... Er, yes... She can 'split it'." Heart-of-Gold affirms, "And she will share a Leaf-Lover's salad with Tiny."
"Excellent, everything is sorted out!" Tiny chirps, waving his hooves in the air. "Yay, compromise!"
"Indeed." James cleared his throat, putting his menu in the center of the table. "Now we must simply... Survive until the food is here..."
The four creatures looked to each other in a moment of quiet contemplation. Surely it couldn't be that difficult...
"Based on its description, 'high school' is analogous to Pachydermatous college." Bruno said. He had listened to Sunset's explanation, occasionally interjecting with questions of his own. It made Sunset feel at ease, and she got the feeling it made Bruno less tense as well.
"Really?" The unicorn asked, "Then what do you do AFTER college?"
"The Queriemen do not attend college. Pachyderms do." Bruno explained, "Afterwards, they attend university. Rather, they did..."
"Pachyderms..." The word sparked recognition in Sunset's eyes. "Elephants? Big ears, grey leathery skin, loooong trunks?" She asked, stretching out her hooves in front of her muzzle.
"YES!" Bruno blared, leaning forward and putting his hands on the ground. His head was unable to move, but his eyes slid across its surface to meet Sunset's gaze. "You know of them? There are pachyderms on Earth?"
Sunset was surprised, she hadn't seen Bruno excited before. She was beginning to think he was totally emotionless. "Y-Yeah. They don't go to college though... They're just wild animals, they don't talk or do anything... Just kinda run around and be cute and eat leaves and stuff." She says, "I bet I can show you if we get back to Earth."
Bruno leaned back, "Agreed. My prime directive is the protection of Pachydermatous citizens, regardless of sentience."
Sunset clapped her hooves together. "Ooh, wait until I bring back a freakin' alien robot! The World Wildlife Fund won't believe their eyes! How would you feel about beating up elephant poachers?" Sunset asked.
Bruno froze, his eyes flickering briefly. "... Elaborate: Elephant poachers?"
Sunset cringed and put a hoof to her mouth, lowering her ears. "R-Right... Well uh, you see, on Earth, elephants are just animals. Humans are usually super nice to animals! Some aren't though, they poach them for their ivory..."
Bruno sat silently for a moment, before stating something to Sunset. "My new directive is to access Earth. You will be returned to your home, and these poachers will be neutralized."
"YES!" Sunset cheers, throwing up her hooves. "Giant animal saving alien robot! You are the COOLEST, Bruno!" She giggles.
Bruno looked down at her, seemingly taken aback by the comment. "... Thank you." He said quietly. No one had ever said something like that to Bruno, save Tracker.
"So, tell me about this Pachyderma place. How did elephants start making... Robots?" Sunset asks, eager to learn of this other world.
"The Grand Inquiry began approximately one thousand and two years ago." Bruno said.
"That doesn't sound very approximate..." Sunset replied.
"I cannot account for the time I was offline. My chronometer is only active while I am functional." Bruno rebutted. "It has been one thousand and two years since the Grand Inquiry began, in addition to the time I was inactive in the Abyssinian desert. Hegemon Aeternae established the program to understand and control the process of magic. The robotics division produced a new line of automatons for the purpose, that being the Querimen."
"That's what you are, right?" Sunset reaffirmed, her voice filled with fascination.
"Correct. I am Bruno III, a capital patrol unit. Though with no capital to patrol, that means little."
Sunset's eyes shown, the little pony hopping up and bounding to the cart. "Hold on, can you write some of this down? I don't have hands, but this is seriously awesome..."
"Awesome?" Bruno asked, standing and following after Sunset.
"Duh! History is my favorite subject! And Sci-fi is like, my favorite genre! I wanna know EVERYTHING about Pachyderma..." Sunset opened one of the chests in Heart-of-Gold's cart, looking for a notepad or book to write in.
"And I would... Enjoy teaching." Bruno said, "Tracker never asked me about my past. He said remembering that sort of stuff brings trouble..."
"If you're a thief and a bum, sure." Sunset says, "But Pachyderma sounds like it was a cool place."
"It was..." Bruno said pensively, looking to the ground.
The lamb roast was gently lowered to the table by an attending waitress, a nervous little crow who looked up at the looming minotaur before her. "Thank you kindly, dear." Heart-of-Gold says, nodding to the waitress.
"Thank you~!" Tiny chirps with her, James nodding in a little bow with them.
Tiny looked to Tracker, who was already trying to pick apart the meat with his claws. The cat looked up at the other members of the party, blinking. "... What? We said thanks and stuff."
"WE said thanks." Tiny said, gesturing to himself and Heart-of-Gold. "And James bowed, so I think that counts."
Tracker grumbles and lowers his ears, "NOW you tell me, after it's all awkward and stuff... I thought it was like, a group thing." He said, looking to the bird. "Thanks, ma'am." He said, feeling like a disciplined toddler.
"Uhm... You're... Welcome." The crow said quietly. "Enjoy the meal."
"Will do!" Tracker meows, taking that as a cue to dig in. He pulled off a long strip of meat and bit into it, growling as the crow walked away.
"I think that's as good as Tracker gets." Tiny said, looking up at James and Heart-of-Gold. "What about you?"
"I'm surprised he made it this far without digging in the trash." James said bluntly, grabbing a knife and fork to cut into the lamb. "Tracker, please refrain from biting my half of the lamb. I'm trying to actually separate it..."
"Mmph, let me!" Tracker says with a mouthful of food, unsheathing a claw and slicing the middle of the lamb roast. He slaps one paw on James' half of the roast and begins to pull on his own, the slab of meat ripping apart into two uneven chunks. "Ta-da! Easy peasy! Utensils are a scam." Tracker says, waving his paw.
James sat in silence, a mortified look on his face as he stares at the mangled food on the table.
"Hmm. Heart-of-Gold may have been driven insane as well, if she were in your paws." Heart-of-Gold said, putting a hand to her chin. "You are very much forgiven, James."
The raiju's left eye began to twitch as he put his utensils down on the table. "Thank you, so very very much, ma'am..." He said quietly.
The meal continued with little incident, Heart-of-Gold spearing healthy forkfuls of her salad while Tiny nibbled on a tomato skin. James sheared off the top half of his roast and the half nearest Tracker, leaving himself less than an eighth of the original cut. At least, so he thought, it would be less diseased that way...
Tiny bobbed his head excitedly, scanning the table for everyone's faces. "So, this is nice." The breezie said, "No fighting, no arguing with the waitstaff... I think this mission was a success, huh?" He says, clapping his hooves.
"In the strictest sense, yes." James said, sliding the sloughed off bits of meat he refused to eat towards Tracker.
"So, what did we learn today?" Heart-of-Gold asked, crossing her arms.
"Eshkooz me?" Tracker asks, looking up and wiping his full mouth with his paw. He swallowed a glob of lamb and coughed, smacking at his chest. "Am I being tested? Does this count to my final grade?"
"Heart-of-Gold, please. This is unnecessary..." James whines.
"Hup-up-up!" Heart-of-Gold held up a hand, "WHAT did we learn today?"
James growled and crossed his arms. "We treat everydog with respect, not just the people in our charge..."
"Uhhh, I learned that it's super warm in Eversummer!" Tracker grins, tapping his paws on the floor of the patio.
Tiny nodded in response, tugging on the neckhole of his sweater. "Uh-huh! That's why I have a sweater!" He chirps.
"Tracker. What did you learn about manners?" Heart-of-Gold asks.
"Oh! Hmm... That..." Tracker inhales sharply, leaning side to side. "Weeeee say 'thank you', even when everykitten else already did?"
Heart-of-Gold's face was tired and sullen. She lifted a hand to it and groaned quietly. "Yes, Tracker... We do."
"I told you, I think that's as good as Tracker gets..." Tiny says quietly, putting a hoof under his chin pensively.
"And YOU need to learn to step in when things are going wrong!" Heart-of-Gold says, poking Tiny's head and ending him rolling.
"Woah! Hey hey, what's that supposed to mean?" He asks, huffing.
"There were THREE people watching after Sunset. Tracker and James did not ruin her day alone..."
Tiny grumbles and sits on his flanks. "What am I supposed to do? I'm barely even a hoof tall..."
"You could have told Tracker not to steal the garbage can..." James said quietly.
"Coulda told James to stop calling me stupid... And agreed when I said his name was weird." Tracker mumbles, looking away.
"All Raiju have strange little names." Heart-of-Gold said, biting into her salad. "And while you are under Heart-of-Gold's care, you will NOT perform thievery. Understood?" She says, waving a fork accusatorily at Tracker.
"Understood..." Tracker grumbles, kicking at nothing and curling up on the chair.
"Excellent!" The minotaur claps her hands together, "Then let us away. Heart-of-Gold is saving the rest of her meal for Sunset Shimmer. We will show her that we are more than capable of taking care of her until her home is found."
"Yes! Hooray, friendship!" Tiny says, raising his hooves in the air and clapping them.
"Okay, new rule: Don't say things like that." Tracker says, snapping his fingers.
"For once, we agree on something." James says, laughing and putting a paw on his forehead. "... But seriously, don't say that ever again."
A week or so had passed since Heart-of-Gold's caravan had arrived in the town, and each morning brought with it a special type of dread for Sunset Shimmer. The idea that a changeling could be traipsing about her home, draining her parents and boyfriend of love and life... The idea that dozens more were already in her town, and even the thought that she was missing out on valuable school time. What if there was no way home? What if there was no way to stop the changelings?
A harsh knocking at the door to her room in the inn caused Sunset to gasp, her mind snapping out of the worrying spiral of thoughts that plagued her mind. "You in there, Sunset?" Tracker called out.
"Yeah, what's going on?" Sunset asked, hopping off of the bed and trotting to the door. Normally Tracker wasn't awake until well after everyone else, this must have been important. Sunset opened the door using her magical abilities, something Tiny had been teaching her under the strict and watchful eyes of Bruno.
"Goldie got a letter from her parents." Tracker said, scratching the top of his head. "She uh, doesn't sound happy about it though... You should come downstairs..."
Sunset gave a worried expression and trotted down the stairs with Tracker, passing through the main hall of the inn. Sunset could hear all manner of noises outside, mostly loud squawking and bellowing. Opening the door, Sunset found herself standing before a tall pair of pink storks, before them a large chest like the ones Heart-of-Gold held in her cart. They squawked and warbled at the princess, who bellowed out in response in a low, throaty 'moo'.
"What the..." Sunset turned to Tiny and James, who made their way towards the pair.
"Heart-of-Gold's parents said they can't help us." Tiny said, rubbing his hooves together awkwardly. "It started a fight. The storks say that --"
"You speak Stork?" Sunset interrupted, rubbing the side of her head.
"Oh it's really just like Sparrow." Tiny said, "Anyway, the storks said that the royal family won't be sending any more supplies over until Heart-of-Gold comes home, and that all of their messages will be by falcon from now on. I don't speak Falcon, way too shrieky for me."
"And Heart-of-Gold is trying to explain the gravity of the situation to the storks... And thus, her parents." James said, looking over his shoulder to Heart-of-Gold. "Though... I hope the storks don't mention what strong language she's using..."
"No help?" Sunset asks, scoffing. "How are we gonna find a way to Earth?"
"That's just it," Tiny began, "The storks said that NO one in Minos has ever heard of Earth. The only other world they know of is Tartarus, and that's not exactly on the way home..."
"Wait." Sunset paused, blinking and giving Tiny a curious, tilted expression. "... Tartarus? Like... Old Greek myth Tartarus? The underworld?"
"Yeah, THAT Tartarus. Full of REALLY bad dudes. Cerberus, Tirek, Umbrum..." Tiny tilted his head side to side as he listed off evil-doers, poking his hoof as if counting off fingers.
"Woah, Tirek?" Sunset asks, "Like, from Rise of Tirek? He's REAL?" She began to bounce, "Ohhh I knew this place looked familiar!" She looked around as her mind began swimming with possibilities.
"You've heard of him?" James asked, "He's an old Minotaur legend. He's very real too, and VERY dangerous... Supposedly he still rots in Tartarus to this day."
"Earth has legends of Tartarus too!" Sunset said excitedly, "And Tirek! Sort of... He's in one of those video games I play... If Earth and this world have those in common, maybe there's a link that can get me back home!" Sunset looks around the group expectantly, smiling.
"Through TARTARUS?" Tiny asked, spreading his forelimbs wide, "Are you CRAZY? That's like... That's like... That's like trying to go through TARTARUS! That's how crazy it is! It's already the expression for the craziest thing you can do!"
"Like trying to find a unicorn who isn't a unicorn's home on another planet?" Sunset asks with a smirk.
The group was quiet, Tiny giving Sunset a little glare.
"Hah, I must appreciate your tenacity and determination..." James said, patting Sunset's head. "I say we go with our original plan. Equestria is the safest option, even if Celestia doesn't have the best reputation for solving problems..."
"She causes more than she starts." Tiny hisses, "I say we try to convince Minos to help us."
"What do you think, Tracker?" Sunset asks, turning her head to the Abyssinian. Tracker was leaning against the railing of the porch, cleaning out his ear with a claw.
"Huh? Think? Uhh, sorry Sunset, that's not really in my list of skills." Tracker says, flicking something onto the ground with a look of disgust.
"BRAAAHHH!" Heart-of-Gold bellowed, throwing her hands up into the air and shooing the storks away. "BROOOO, MOOO, BOOO!" She wails, crossing her arms and turning her head away with a huff.
"Good heavens... Don't you think that was a bit harsh, ma'am?" James asked, picking at his paws.
"No!" Heart-of-Gold spits. "Heart-of-Gold doesn't want to see those storks ever again! And from the sound of it, she probably NEVER WILL!" The minotaur takes a deep, shaky breath and stamps a hoof on the ground. "Flight of fancy... Can you BELIEVE Heart-of-Gold's mother!?"
"No ma'am." James said, nudging Tracker in the ribs.
"Eh? Wha?" Tracker looked around, eyes locking with Heart-of-Gold's. "Yeah yeah, what James said."
"Heart-of-Gold will find a way to Earth BY HERSELF! With her friends!" The minotaur exclaims, raising a fist to the sky. "She just... Doesn't know how... Mother and Father have always been there to help Heart-of-Gold..."
"Perhaps we SHOULD go to Minos, princess." James said, putting his paws together.
"That could take weeks! Months even!" Heart-of-Gold shouted in exasperation. "The changelings on Earth will have completed their invasion..."
"Without proper coordinates, the journey to Earth could take years." Bruno put forth, "I have spent 834 days looking for a way to Pachyderma, to no avail."
"Well, I think I found a way!" Sunset says, stamping a hoof. "Tartarus!"
James groaned and put a paw on his face, the others all staring at Sunset in surprise. "Tartarus? Have you gone mad?" Heart-of-Gold asked, putting a hand to her chest.
"No! Earth has legends of Tartarus, which means that Tartarus must have some kind of connection to Earth! It can't be on both planets by sheer coincidence, can it?" She asked, looking about the group.
"I dunno, seems like a bad idea... I'd know, I'm good at those." Tracker said, scratching the back of his head.
"Sunset is correct, that would be too much of a coincidence." Bruno states, looking down at the unicorn. "I have learned, in these past few days, to trust her intuition. Sunset is more intelligent than she seems."
"Thank you." Sunset said with a little bow. "... I think. Does uh, anybody know how to GET to Tartarus?" She wonders aloud, looking to Heart-of-Gold.
"Uhh, yeah. Die." Tiny said, perching atop Sunset's horn. "It's the land of the dead, Sunset, MEGA bad juju." Tiny waved his hooves for emphasis, "Or, we could commit a crime worse than ANYTHING the ENTIRE world has EVER seen... Then you get to go there early!" His voice was full of an uncharacteristic sarcasm and pretention. "Did I mention how TERRIBLE of an idea this is!?"
"Hmm... Worse than anything the world has ever seen..." Tracker said, stroking his chin pensively.
"NO!" The other five yelled at Tracker, causing him to yelp and hold his paws together.
"Haha, kidding, kidding..." He gulps.
"There must surely be a way there... Tirek was sent there a thousand years ago, as were Apophis and the Nue..." James said, "And there MUST be a way out... Gashadokuro rise from its depths by Inokokka..." the raiju held his own chin and furrowed his brow in thought.
"Ohhh boy, that's a LOT of words with a LOT of little parts." Tracker said, holding his head.
Tiny sighed, crossing his arms. "... The breezies know where it is." He said, closing his eyes. All heads turned to him.
"You're kidding." James said incredulously. "Why?"
"The breezies follow wind and sunbeams across the entire world, we see all kinds of things." The breezie replied. "Including the gate to Tartarus. It's hidden. I won't tell you where it is, but I could lead the way there... But only if you're totally certain that this is the ONLY way home..."
Sunset looked to Bruno, who looked to Tiny. "It is the most logical conclusion." He said to the little breezie. "Tartarus would be a junction of extraplanar travel."
Tiny takes a deep breath, nodding slowly. "Heh... Well, it's actually between here and Equestria. I say we head for Equestria, and when we near Tartarus, we'll have had time to come to a decision."
"A prudent decision." Bruno said. "I agree."
"I did say that Equestria would be the safest option." James said, looking up to Heart-of-Gold. "Though the quickest way would be through Sandsea."
"The site of Old Sacanas." Heart-of-Gold said with a hushed whisper.
"Tirek's kingdom?" Sunset asked with a gasp, only to be met with a series of glares. The pony lowered her head and blushed. "I-It's the last level in Rise of Tirek, heh..."
"Yes. Tirek's kingdom. What is left of it." Heart-of-Gold said. "There is a global treaty forbidding any national agent from entering its grounds. If Heart-of-Gold is caught in Sacanas, it could mean grave repercussions for Minos."
"Who would turn us in if there's no national agents there?" Sunset asked.
"The gargoyles. They are few in number since the fall of Scorpan, but they exist." Heart-of-Gold answers.
"What do you think buddy?" Tracker looked up at Bruno, swinging his tail. "You wanna break some international law?"
"No." Was Bruno's harsh reply. "I do, however, wish to see my home once again... This may be the fastest way to do that."
"Then... We're really going?" Sunset asked, gulping, looking around the group. Tracker nodded excitedly, Tiny looked away with an odd, reflective expression masking his face. Heart-of-Gold took a deep breath and closed her eyes.
"Heart-of-Gold has little wealth to her name and even less help from her family... If this is the fastest way to Equestria and Tartarus, then so be it."
"It will make for quite the story." James said, smacking his fist into his open paw. "Though sadly, one we can tell to few..."
"Certainly not." Tiny spat out. "We can't tell ANYbreezie... We can't even be SEEN in Sacanas..."
"At least Heart-of-Gold can't, right? She's the only government official here, isn't she?" Sunset asks, "That's what a 'national agent' is, isn't it?"
"Right, right..." Tiny said quietly. "I guess we could just keep the big bright white and blonde minotaur hidden..."
"Great!" Tracker slaps his paws together. "Creepy roadtrip~!" He squeals excitedly, bouncing on his toes.
"I know you two are really nervous about this." Sunset said, walking towards Heart-of-Gold and Tiny. "I can't just sit back and watch my world get consumed by changelings, though. We only have a month and a half until the Fall Formal, and that's assuming they don't strike earlier."
Tiny and Heart-of-Gold nod in understanding. "Heart-of-Gold will be glad to help you, Sunset Shimmer. She just did not expect a situation of such gravity to befall her..." The princess looked to her servant, and her lips began to curl up in a smile. "Though we DID hope for it, didn't we James?"
James laughed in response, cracking his knuckles. "Glory and honor, your highness, ours for the taking." He bowed, "Saving a world will seem like a bonus."
"Then it is settled. We will leave at once." Bruno said, turning on his heel and stomping towards the Speedy.
"Can't we get breakfast first?" Tracker whines, "I was ordered to stop stealing garbage for my meals!"
Sunset giggles and holds a foreleg up. "Well, this town actually has a bakery. Wanna stock up on some breakfast rolls before we hit the road?"
Heart-of-Gold and James nodded, Tiny turning to face Sunset and sighing. "Heh... Here's to new friends and big adventures, huh guys?" He asks, wiggling his antennae.
"Yes!" Heart-of-Gold bellows. "Sacanas, then Tartarus! Just as Bucephalus and Many-Wounds of ancient legend!" The princess throws up her arms with a grin.
"To adventure!" James barked out, raising his arms with her.
"Adventure!" Sunset laughs, briefly rearing up and kicking out with her forelegs.
"Queen Chrysalis won't know what hit her." James yips, wrapping his arms around his friends. "I haven't felt this excited in years!"
"Look out Earth, Heart-of-Gold is coming!" The minotaur bellowed, clenching her fist.
Sunset looks up at the sun, shielding her eyes with a hoof. It was too large to be Earth's, just like the moon. "Yeah." She said quietly, "Here's hoping Sunset Shimmer is with her..."