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“This is Peter, leave a message and I’ll get back-”
Gwen hung up on the voicemail that she had heard far too many times today.
One night. That’s all she had asked for. One night that Peter wouldn’t magically disappear into thin air.
The Stark internship. That’s the excuse that she had heard almost every time. Peter usually kept the details about the internship pretty vague. Gwen had no problem with that. She understood that someone like Tony Stark would like to keep his projects a secret. But what could Peter possibly be doing for Tony Stark at 3:47 AM?
In short, Gwen wasn’t buying it.
For the fifth time that night, she stared down at Peter’s contact photo, debating whether or not she would give in once again and call him. Yes, Gwen was annoyed. It wasn’t fair that she couldn’t even reach her boyfriend after he mysteriously vanished from school sometime during lunch. She shouldn’t even be surprised by now.
...But was she a bit worried too? Maybe just a little.
It was a Friday night, she knew she would be up this late anyway. Her sleep schedule wasn’t necessarily the best. Peter understood that. He would always be up too, both of them serving as a comfort to the other. He was always there when she needed him.
But what about when she just wanted to be with him? She didn’t need to see him, technically. But that was the whole point! Can’t she just watch a movie with her boyfriend?
No, apparently not. Not if the Stark internship had anything to say about it.
Gwen was just about to give up for the night when the Imperial March began to echo around her room, Peter’s ringtone. She sighed, not sure if it was out of relief or annoyance. Probably a little of both.
“Hello?”
“Gwen?”
“Yeah, it’s me.”
“Are you alright? You called a few times.”
Gwen scoffed. “Yeah, you weren’t answering. Honestly, Peter, I don’t know why I-”
“Are you busy?”
Gwen stopped short. His voice sounded tired and quiet now that it was no longer laced with concern. She frowned. “Of course not. What could I possibly be doing at four in the morning?”
There was a hollow chuckle, Gwen could catch it even over the phone. “The world never sleeps, there’s always stuff to do at four in the morning.”
Gwen rolled her eyes. “Uh huh. I’m sure you party this late all the time.”
“I sure do,” Peter replied. “But seriously, I don’t want to intrude, so you can definitely say no, but… could I come over?”
“It’s four in the morning.”
“You’ve said that like twenty times, you know,” Peter teased.
Gwen huffed a breath. “And how do you plan on getting in? Climbing my fire escape?”
“Exactly that.”
Gwen gasped at the voice behind her, turning to see Peter sitting outside her cracked window. She quickly ran over and opened it, pulling the boy inside. “How the hell did you get up here?”
Peter smirked. “A magician never reveals his secrets.” He reached to rest a hand on Gwen’s cheek and pull her closer, but she moved away, causing the boy to frown. Gwen had to use all her willpower to resist his pouting face.
“Where the hell were you, Peter Parker?”
His face fell slightly. “I told you, I was-”
“Yeah, yeah, I know,” Gwen cut off. “The Stark internship.”
“Gwen-”
“No, seriously, Peter! No internship requires work at four in the morning, that doesn’t happen. What are you really up to?”
Peter walked closer to Gwen once more to rest a hand on her cheek. This time, she didn’t pull away. He came closer and rested their foreheads together. “Gwen… you’ve been great to me this entire time we’ve been together, and I could never be more grateful. I just…” He trailed off and pulled away slightly.
Gwen let him pull away. Peter seemed a bit… uneasy tonight. The type of unease where you can’t sit still. He walked towards the now opened window and played with the curtains that moved in the breeze.
They had gone shopping for those curtains together.
Seeming to have finally gained the courage, Peter turned back towards Gwen but didn’t move any closer. “I don’t like this anymore than you. I owe you so much, but I owe Mr. Stark a lot too. Without him, I just- I don’t know, I wouldn’t be where I am right now. I’m sorry, and I get if this is too much to-”
Peter was cut off by Gwen’s mouth against his. After his initial surprise, Gwen felt Peter reciprocate as he leaned in just enough for her to notice. He gently reached up and rested his hands on her shoulders, letting Gwen kiss him for only as long as she wanted.
And in the few seconds that seemed to last forever, Gwen had a realization about her mysterious boyfriend.
It was the little things.
The way Peter memorized her sandwich order. How he always knew when she needed an extra hug that day. The way he was always gentle, even on the days when she thought she deserved far less than that. The extra notes in the margins of her textbooks.
How he always came back to her, and the heart that she let him take was always intact when he returned.
All the little things are what made her fall in love with Peter Parker.
She could never figure out how he managed to miss her phone calls, but ended up on her fire escape ten minutes later. He was a challenge, a dangerous one in some ways. But she had never backed down from a challenge, even this one.
So when she finally pulled away, she didn’t hold back the small giggle as she watched Peter chase after her before opening his eyes.
He watched her closely with those chocolate brown eyes of his, waiting for whatever she might do next. Peter had this sort of curious concentration about him. Gwen could never pinpoint it, but she could tell when he had all his focus on her.
And that’s when she made her second realization of the night.
She didn’t know what Peter was doing every time he didn’t answer her calls. She still wonder’s how he manages to disappear at random points during the day.
But not for one second would she ever doubt that he loved her. Someday, she would find out what Peter was up to. Gwen had no doubt there was a very good reason he rarely answered his phone between 10 PM and 2 AM. She has told him many times that he doesn’t have to keep secrets from her.
But he doesn’t have to climb her fire escape that’s thirty-eight stories high just to give her peace of mind either.
Gwen sighed, giving Peter a tired smile. “You know I love you, right?”
Peter removed a hand from her shoulder and brushed a stray hair from her face before returning to his original position. “Of course I do. You know I love you, right?”
She smiled. “Yeah.”
Peter sighed in relief and pulled her in for a tight hug.
Gwen hummed as she listened to Peter’s heartbeat. “Are you ever going to tell me where you really go everyday?” She asked quietly, the words tasting bitter on her tongue.
He tangled his hand further into her hair, letting the question ring in the air for a moment before responding. “I don’t know.”
Gwen closed her eyes. “I’m not stupid, you know. I’ll figure it out eventually.”
Peter’s grip tightened. Gwen didn’t know how to act when his next breath came out shakily. He seemed… afraid. Of what, she wasn’t sure. That only led her to hug him tighter, letting him sway her back and forth to whatever imaginary music he had in his mind.
He breathed out another soft puff of air. “I know you will. That’s what I’m afraid of.”
They stayed like for a while longer, afraid to break whatever equilibrium had been reached. When they finally did, Gwen pulled Peter towards her bed. “Can we just lay together for a while?” Hopefully this would allow them to melt some of the tension.
For some reason, Peter had always been against staying the night ever since they started dating quite a few months ago. When she questioned Ned about it, he mentioned that he had never been a big fan of sleepovers, so she never pushed it.
After a moment of contemplation, Peter nodded. “Only a few minutes, right?”
“Right.”
Peter laid down and opened his arms, allowing Gwen to lay her head down on her chest. They fit together almost too perfectly.
They were both asleep within minutes.
-
Gwen woke up slowly, taking her time coming back to reality.
The first thing she noticed was the arm wrapped around her, resting on her lower back. The next thing she recognized was the soft breath tickling her forehead every few seconds.
This is nice, she thought. We should do this more often.
That thought alone reminded Gwen of why they hadn’t done this more often. Though as she looked at Peter’s peaceful sleeping face, she couldn’t help but wonder why he would ever not want to spend the night with her. Of course, she would never expect him to do anything like that. But cuddling never hurt anyone, right?
Gwen felt the vibrations through Peter’s graphic t-shirt as he mumbled something incoherent in his sleep. That must’ve been what woke me up, she noted. Gwen knew she wasn’t the lightest of sleepers, so surely he must’ve been doing this for at least a few minutes to wake her up.
Sure enough, what couldn’t have been more than twenty seconds later, Peter mumbled more unintelligible words. However, this time, Gwen also felt him grip onto her shirt where his hand was resting, scrunching up the fabric into his newly-made fist.
This was enough to prompt Gwen to sit up, slowly removing Peter’s hand from her shirt. She was even further bewildered when he began to weakly scratch at his face as if he was… trying to get something off?
It didn’t take a rocket scientist to realize he was having some sort of nightmare, so Gwen gently grabbed one of his hands and held it in her own. “Wake up, Petey, it’s just a dream,” she said quietly. Her eyebrows furrowed in concern when she still didn’t receive a response. This time, she reached up and tried to wipe the bangs off his forehead. “Peter, you’re okay with-”
She cut herself off with a sharp gasp when Peter’s hand reached up to grab her wrist with lightning speed, his eyes flying open. His grip was excruciatingly tight, tighter than she would’ve assumed possible for Peter, especially when half asleep.
“Peter! Let go of my hand!”
“I can’t breathe!” He gasped out, not even acknowledging Gwen beside him. Despite his eyes being open, his mind was clearly somewhere else.
Gwen struggled to remove Peter’s grip with her free hand, but she knew it was useless. “Peter, please, you’re hurting me!” She begged as she clawed at his hand.
She wasn’t sure if it was her words or the scratching that brough Peter back to reality, but something did as he abruptly released pressure on her wrist, bringing his own hands to his chest as he gasped for air.
Normally Gwen would’ve been right there to comfort him, but could you blame her under the circumstances? She could only stare in shock at what had just happened as her boyfriend slowly steadied out his breathing.
It was clear when Peter finally figured out what had happened, blankly looking around the room in confusion until his eyes landed on Gwen. They immediately widened with panic. “Oh my god, Gwen…” he trailed off. “Are you okay?”
Gwen scoffed humorlessly. “Hell of a grip you’ve got there, Parker.” Any fear that she had moments ago aimed towards him melted away as his eyes frantically searched over her entire body, eventually resting on the hand clutched close to her chest.
“Crap... oh Gwen. I’m so- I’m so sorry.” He looked into her eyes for clearance, which she gave, as he gingerly brought the hand closer to himself to inspect it. “I hurt you…”
Gwen shook her head. “I know you didn’t mean to, Peter, it’s not a big-”
“That’ll be bruised for- for a week, at least!” Despite his increase in volume, he was gentle as he set her hand down in his lap. “This is definitely a big deal! I shouldn’t have done this, this is my fault. I knew better than to-”
“Nuh uh,” Gwen interrupted. “What have we said about blaming ourselves for things out of our control?” She asked sternly, referencing the conversation they have had many times in the past.
“Gwen, I literally caused this.”
“You can’t control your dreams, Peter. Speaking of… do you want to talk about it?”
“The dream? No, just a bad memory, nothing special.”
“What bad memory was there when you couldn’t breathe?”
Peter made eye contact at that, greatly resembling a deer caught in headlights. “How-”
“I heard you. You said it outloud.”
He ran a hand through his hair, a nervous habit that Gwen had begun to notice. “I just- It’s not really important.”
Gwen couldn’t help but roll her eyes. “If you’re having nightmares about it, clearly it is important.”
His eyes broke away from hers, leaving him to glance down at the hand she had yet to remove from in front of him. “I won’t lie to you. But I can’t tell you the truth either.”
After a moment, Gwen sighed in frustration. “Fine, if you don’t want to talk to me, whatever. But you need to talk to someone, Peter. It’ll only get worse if you don’t.”
He shook his head, eyes closing to hide the emotion they were bound to give away. “I know, but I can’t.” The reply was barely a whisper, but she caught it in the silent bedroom. Then he finally looked back at her, a sad resignation in his eyes. It was always his eyes that gave him away.
“You can, though. You can tell me anything.”
“It’s not that simple,” Peter sighed, standing up as he did so. “I should go home.”
“You don’t have to,” Gwen responded softly, but she knew that he had already made up his mind.
He didn’t answer that, only walking to the other side of the bed to give her a quick kiss on the forehead. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“See you tomorrow,” she echoed, “If you ever pick up your phone.”
Gwen counted it as a win when his lips quirked up at the sides. “Don’t I always, eventually?”
With that, Peter stepped out the window, closing the curtains behind him. She could no longer see him, but she still heard his words. “I love you, Gwen Stacy.”
Gwen stood up, wanting to watch as he left. Maybe this would be the first secret she learned about Peter Parker, how he managed to get to her window so fast.
But when she opened the curtains, he was gone, leaving her alone in her open window.
“I love you too, Peter Parker.”
And one day, she would get to love every part of him, secrets and all.