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Cas walked outside.
an evil bird was there
castiel ate the evil bird and became evil.
Dean did a double take and asked castiel why are u eating birds
“well i’m not a vegetarian dean”
Oh, you like meat? He winked.
he squawked
bird
cas looked annoyed. "i do not like you anymore dean. i only like doing evil"
:( said dean
"how did you do that with your voice dean" cas asked
;) sa8d dean
😳 said cas
then cas used his evil bird powers to fly in the air
WHat the fuck are you doing i hate gay people sam shouted
Rude said crowley
what about me gabriel said from behind him
gabriel? you're back again?
“charlie!” said charlie, who was there and wanted to feel included
"get me out of ur belly" said the evil bird cas ate
Kevin saif kev8n
Yea duh im back im too sexy to die gabriel said with a limp wrist
“hmmm” said sam. “lots of gay people here and we’ve still yet to solve the problem”
"whats the problem?" kevin asked
"problem? what problem?" said evil bird cas
the bird did not like that
"haha jinx" said kevin
“THE PROBLEM IS THE EVIL BIRD” said sam
"the bird did not like that" said cas
"i dont see any women" said crowley (hes british)
“charlie!” said charlie, annoyed
are you a fuck8ng pokemon charlie said uhhhj rowena
"you only see what you want to see fruit ass" gabriel said to crowley like a smartass
"rowena you know about pokemon?" said kevin
“charlie,,,” said charlie sadly (she’d been cursed)
mom stop embarassing me ssid crowley (is she his mom idk)
Hell yeah said rowrna soulsilver is my favorite game
charlie! said charlie
"you always do this mom im a big boy i can cause evil all by myself" crowley crowled
"dude milf alert" said dean
i know said sam
Oh are we talking pokemon? thats awesome i like gold edition said gabriel
dean looked disgusted. "what?"sam said
“where’s the milf?!!?” said the evil bird from inside cas. “i love milfs”
"ew fucking nerd" said dean
the bird says it loves milfs said castiel
"what the frigg. ur gay castiel u promised me" said dean
"the bird said it" cas said
"i said it" said the bird, using cas's voice
“i’m still gay but the bird is heteroflexible” said cas
"what the fuck is heteroflexible" asked dean
"heyyyyy ;)" a morally grey bluejay chirped
"its when youre straight and good at yoga" said kevin
“im jughead” said jughead
"thats so weird" said dean
“it’s where you mostly like women but sometimes like dudes” said the evil bird “i mean speaking from a male perspective. i’m pretty closeminded.”
"sounds like being bi" said kevin
omg thats me! im heteroflexible said dean
"fucking rude" said the bird
“Im weird” said jughead
"we know, jug" said archie
dean scowled.
" we're not in riverdale anymore archie" said veronica
stupid man thing im fuckin ballin said the resident evil lady
reggie mantle
my plan worked! shouted rowena “i wanted to summon the cast of riverdale”
OH MY GOD A GHOST sam yelled
he just fuckin stands there
dean started shooting
jack was so happy because he loves riverdale
AT REGGIE?
AT THE GHOST
REGGIE DOWN REGGIE DOWN
WHAT GHOST
HE GOT CAUGHT IN THE CROSSFIEE
THE RESIDENT EVIL LADY
Reggie has died.
"ARCHIE!"said jack who was there
Archie starts tackling dean.
Reggie dies
THIS IS FOR MY BRO U STUPID OLD WHORE archie yells
Yay reggie dies
What if this happens to you
"dean u jus killed a teenager" sam chastises
"Woop woop!" says Hiram Lodge
cas finally coughed up the evil bird “yeah dean that was fucked up” said cas
The bird shits on Dean's head.
dean starts shooting again
this time blinded by bird shit
WHO WILL DEAN KILL THIS TIME
Cas catches the bullet in his teeth and swallows it
"mmm. metallic."
Gnarly moves! said archie
“jimmy novak is actually anemic so this is important for his health” said cas
"i wish i could swallow bullets" said archie
"you could practice with jellybeans" said jughead
you can... but only once said castiel
"thats weird, but thank you jughead" said archie
im weird said jughead
"charlie" charlie charled
“wait wait back up.” sam said “dean you’re into guys? i never thought you’d admit it.” also he gently removed the shotgun from deans grasp
"what no im not gay" dean said
"fuck you, i never said that" said dean, but everyone knew he did
they all heard him
"i get it man. jugheads my wife" archie said
“we heard you!” said kevin
"this happened to my buddy kevin once" said veronica
did our time togeyher in purgatory mean nothing to you said benny
"i'm kevin" said kevin
"what the fuck im kevin" kevin said
“don’t feel ashamed. i was gay a couple of times” said rowena
youre only gay once said misha collinw
"charlie!" said charlie
"go away edward cullen" said sam
"yes, dear, charlie was one of the times i was gay" rowena said
“i thought i was being sneaky” said edward cullen from twilight
crowley groaned
Hiram Lodge stabbed Misha Collins.
misha gurgled
everyone sighed in relief
Misha! He's been stabbed! said genevieve
misha was dead now. everything was good
-fin-
"Had to get him out of the way. He kept tweeting about my secret plans to buy Archie's house and transform it into a bitcoin factory." Hiram said. Hiram still turned Archie's house into a cryptocurrency farm. Jughead was forced to move into Betty's secret basement.