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He didn’t remember why he woke up. Maybe it was a bad dream, maybe he lay in an uncomfortable position, too hot, too cold, who knew. It didn’t matter. He was awake and he couldn’t fall back asleep. He turned around and watched Seto sleep. He looked so vulnerable when he wasn’t frowning or glowering at someone, when he was wearing normal clothes and his scars were visible enough to make Atem want to kiss them until they were gone and he felt no more pain. He brushed some mussed up hair out of Seto’s face, enjoying how soft it felt. He remembered how he used to do the same thing with Seth when he stayed over and suddenly a wave of homesickness crashed over him. He liked staying with Seto, he was glad to be brought back, he loved him to the point it hurt, but sometimes Egypt just seemed further than a convenient jet ride away. He carefully sat up, slowly slipping out of Seto’s hold, doing his best not to wake him. He needed some fresh air.
Stealing a blanket from the bedside so he wouldn’t freeze, he made his way to the roof terrace of the mansion. He ducked out of the short door, pulling himself up at the tiles next to him and wrapped the blanket around his body. The autumn air was chilly and he was barely wearing anything besides underwear and a top. He wished he was wearing socks or at least shoes. Still, he stepped onto the stone tiles and tilted his head up at the stars, watching them shine so far away. He tried finding signs he knew, identifying specific stars, but he had never been good with astronomy. Not to mention this was maybe a tenth of the stars he used to see in Egypt. Just when he began to feel himself sinking even deeper into loneliness and homesickness, he heard a heavy voice behind him.
“What are you doing up here?”
Atem turned around to spot Seto almost folding himself in half to fit through the entrance to the roof terrace. He offered a hand, letting his blanket drop in favour of helping Seto. His skin was hot to the touch and even that little contact provided much more warmth than the blanket ever could. It took him a while to reply.
“I was just… feeling a little homesick. So I came to look at the stars.”
Seto’s eyes were unfocused with sleep but he too tilted his head up to take in the view Atem had been looking at. He made a little humming sound, nothing really decipherable enough to pick a certain emotion or message from.
“But there are so little stars now.” Atem continued. “The sky used to be littered with them. So full. Now it’s just barely the brightest ones.”
Seto seemed to wake up a little more. He picked up the blanket Atem had dropped and draped it back around his shoulders. “Humans have evolved. We discovered more things. Inventions to keep us light in the dark. You could say we didn’t need the stars anymore.” He lead Atem to the edge of the terrace to a point where they could view the city. Lights sparkled everywhere, Atem could imagine a mother tucking her child back into bed after it had a nightmare, people watching TV, maybe someone reading a book too good to put down, someone working on something important, a pair of lovers kissing. Each of those lights held a story, no matter how little.
“Your priest Mahaad might say we stole the stars from the sky. I say we took them and brought them down to earth.”
Atem almost commented on how that sounded so unlike anything Seto would say, but he stayed silent and watched the city lights a little longer. His homesickness wasn’t gone, but at least now it wasn’t at a point where it hurt anymore. Another emotion had come, embraced homesickness and told it it was okay to be there. Content. His love for Seto. Atem watched one of the lights go out and another one turn on. More stories. So many stories he didn’t know. Was there someone like Mana behind one of those lights? Was someone like Mahaad with her, taking care of her? He glanced up at the night sky, then back at the city lights. A puff of air escaped him, white in the cold night. Only now did he realize how cold it actually was. He could feel sleep starting to seep back into his body, lulling him and making him miss the warmth of the bed and secure feeling of Seto’s embrace. He turned to look at him, watch his clear gaze focussed on the distance. Maybe he too was sometimes missing something far away, something that felt so unreachable it hurt. He leaned his head against Seto’s shoulder, taking his hand and holding it tightly.
“Let’s go back to sleep.”