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The soft glow of the Ardhalis lights permeated the night sky, not enough to illuminate the onyx air but just the amount that would snuff out even the largest stars. Without them there, the sky was just a solid black - a cloak over the city, mysterious and wide but daunting.
It was spring then, but the sun had abandoned the sky a long time ago.
Will leaned against the lamp post, his legs stretched out and crossed in front of him. Letting his head fall back against the metal, he winced, the pain reverberating in his already aching skull. The metal only reminded him, reminded him of things like wedding bands. Chains. Restraints.
And to think he had come here to clear his head - how thoughtless of him. Because the place itself reminded him of her , and overall, considering the circumstances, those wedding bands were all that he should have been thinking about. Not her. Stupid of him, really, to come back to this place, this lamp post overlooking the city, when the only other person he’d ever known to come here was her . Perhaps it was just the foolish part of him hoping that she would come here to clear her thoughts with him, even if it meant was as distraught as he was.
“Hey,” a voice whispered, one that he once knew to be far more enthusiastic.
And thus maybe his prayers were answered.
“Hi,” he mumbled in response, resisting the urge to turn his head to capture a glimpse of her. There wouldn’t be much opportunity for him to be turning around the next day, at the altar, eyes flitting over the pews in search of the life that had slipped through his fingers.
“So the lieutenant is getting hitched tomorrow,” Kym said softly, a note of a tease in her voice. “I thought you’d be more excited.” Will opened his mouth, but the breath caught in his throat. There was nothing he could say - there was nothing for him to say. “I’d be more excited for you if I weren’t jealous.”
At this, Will couldn't stop his head from whipping around, only to find Kym chuckling as she ran her hands through her sapphire hair. “Jealous of your ability to find a soulmate, of course. All of this wedding talk has me thinking I might like to marry someday.”
His heart slowed down - he hadn’t quite realized it had picked up its pace. It was something he’d always attributed to Kym, the way she could raise his blood pressure without even saying a word, just by entering the office in the morning in her usual chipper way.
It had taken him months, maybe years - definitely too long - to realize that maybe it wasn’t his blood pressure rising in annoyance. Maybe it was something else, something he didn’t dare say now.
She sighed, falling back against the other side of the lamp post as well, just as they had several moons ago. He felt their shoulder blades touch, and though his instinct was to lean forward and away, he didn’t quite have the energy at that moment. So he just leaned there, listening as her breathing slowed from her trek through the copse of trees, falling into equilibrium with his.
It reminded him of the first time they had both sat there, contemplating, the first time Kym let him take a step into her thoughts. He’d been there many times since, occasionally finding her there too. Sometimes it was just him. He wondered if sometimes it was just her, too, sitting alone under the flickering lamp light, but he preferred not to think about it much. If he had it his way, he would stay in their place all the time, so he was always there when she needed someone to talk to.
Besides, only they knew it - his father couldn’t touch him there.
“Will, can I wear my formal uniform to your wedding tomorrow?”
He turned, and it occurred to him that he had hardly said a word since she appeared before him. Her head was pivoted slightly in his direction, but still looking out at the Ardhalis cityscape rather than him. “I don’t have many dresses, but I wasn’t sure if the uniform would be appropriate-”
“You can wear whatever you want,” he replied, trying to catch her eye. “The uniform is always nice.” You always look lovely in it .
“Okay,” she exhaled, patting the ground beside her absentmindedly. “It’ll be fun, right? Maybe some cake and dancing afterwards?”
Will chuckled. “Of course.”
“Can I…” She paused, and so did Will’s heart. “Can I ask you in advance to save me a dance?” Even with their backs to each other, Will could see her biting her lip in the way she gave him a bitter chuckle. “That rhymed.”
He wrung out his hands. If he was being honest, he didn’t think it was such a great idea - not that anyone else would think anything of it (they were simply coworkers, after all), but it might make him question the decision. The decision, yes, not his.
“If you’ll still live in the same house, and work at the same place,” Kym whispered, leaving Will once again with the realization that awkward moments had passed of him saying nothing, “then why does this feel like a goodbye?”
Her voice cracked with the sharpness of ceramic, not unlike how his heart was breaking in half. He could feel the pressure of his headache mounting behind his eyes, threatening to boil over, but he would not cry here, not in front of her. “Let’s dance now,” he blurted out, the words hardly registering. Hearing no movement from Kym, but also no protest, he jumped up, walking around the lamp post to offer her a hand in standing up. Her caramel eyes were misty, and both of them were silently willing to pretend it was just allergies, a product of the springtime.
She laughed wryly as they locked eyes. “There’s no music.”
“There’s always music-” and then he realized what idiocy was leaving his mouth. He tore his gaze away from hers. “In my head. Because I play piano so often.”
Kym chuckled again, this time a little more real, a little more her . “Nerd.” Her eyes didn’t quite meet his, as if she was seeing through him. He shivered. After a moment, she took his wrist, locking their arms together. “Remember when you fell while I was walking you home?” she snickered.
“I did not fall-” he hoisted her up, resisting the urge to just drop her back in her place against the lamp post- “ You kicked me.”
“That’s what you like to think happened, but it’s your word against mine in court.” They smirked at each other, and it made him miss simpler times, when they could talk under a street lamp and go out to eat and not think much of it. He wondered if they would ever walk home together again, or go out for dinner in each others’ company.
It really was a goodbye of sorts, and Will was reluctant to close the door.
“What are you doing?” Kym asked him through a laugh, and Will’s heart plummeted in concern. What am I doing? He glanced down at her, but nothing seemed out of the ordinary - a hand on her waist, another taking her hand.
“Dancing?”
“Is that what you call this?” Kym dropped his hand, instead looping her arms around his neck. “I think this is a little better.”
“It sure is close,” Will stammered, all at once wanting to envelope her in his arms and put as much distance as possible between them. She blinked up at him expectantly.
“Isn’t that the point?”
“Kym.” The way he said her name sent a chill over him, and he could tell it did for her as well, from the way she suddenly straightened into nothing more than a statue. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah!” She tilted her head, a smile gracing her lips again. “Why do you ask?”
He sighed, willing himself not to glance away for once. “It’s just...you’re always okay.” He didn't have the heart to inform her that she really didn't seem like herself, especially since it was evident that she was trying extremely hard to hide it.
“And?”
“When will you let me in on your thoughts?”
Kym paused, worrying her lower lip. “Can it be my turn to not respond now?”
With a bittersweet hint of a smile, Will nodded, placing a hand on her back. “Is this how you do your kind of dancing?”
“You know-” Kym paused, grimacing. Her hands started to fall from his shoulders, not quite letting go, but not clutching him as tightly as before. “I don’t think I want to dance, actually.”
Will dropped his hand hurriedly. “That’s fine-”
“I think maybe...maybe I just wanted a hug.”
His breath caught. Before his brain had the chance to instruct him to do otherwise, Will had his arms wrapped around her, pulling her in towards his chest, just like before. And it really wasn’t all that different - a little bit of loss, a little bit of fear. A wealth of uncertainty. “What are you thinking?” he whispered.
Kym remained silent for a moment. Did she hear me? Just as Will had come to the conclusion that she had, in fact, not heard him, and was preparing to repeat himself, a sniffle met his ears. “Kym!”
She began to pull away. “Oh, sorry, I’m getting your shirt wet probably-”
“Don’t apologize,” he said, tightening his embrace around her. “Just talk to me.”
She fell silent, but this time, Will knew just to wait for her. “I just-” She stopped, and Will ran his hand in a circle on her back in an attempt to soothe her. “I just don’t want this to end.”
Will refrained from asking what she meant, knowing that would somehow make things even worse. Instead, he nodded, resting his chin on her head. Somehow, despite her vagueness, he knew exactly what she meant - even if he didn't know quite what word he could use to define it. Not a friendship, not a romance... Soleil . Just undeniably unique to them. “I...I don’t want it to end either.”
Kym looked up at him with a tight-lipped smile, tear tracks staining either side of her face. He never thought he would see her smile the same again after that one single glance. “I guess it should make me happy that you agree, but...I wish you didn’t.”
Furrowing his brow, Will met her eyes. “Why?”
“Because I just want you to be happy.”
He released a breath through a small grin. “It’s funny, because that’s what I want for you, and yet also the one thing I can’t give you.”
Kym settled her head down against him again. “You can still yell at me for not doing my paperwork.”
Laughing, Will brushed her hair back from her face. “I think I preferred the times outside of work.”
“Me too.”
He wanted to tell her so much at that moment - how he wanted to be there for her forever, to go more places together, to have somewhere else only they knew that wasn’t just some random street lamp, but maybe their own house. But he couldn’t make empty promises to her or to himself. He just continued to hold her, hoping that said enough.
Will just wished that by some miracle, the wedding could be called off.
Fortunately for him, miracles are granted every once in a while.
The next day, he arrived at the wedding location to find that the officiant, who was Miss Darcy’s uncle, had been mysteriously kidnapped by Lune - what exactly for, Will might never know. Of course they could have found another officiant, but Miss Darcy, with a wink in Will’s direction, assured Stefan that she was adamant to be married by that officiant, if he should ever return to society. He did the next day, with no recollection of where he had been or who he had spoken to, just a purple hyacinth left as a threat (or maybe an apology for a misunderstanding, who knows). Those 24 hours were just enough time for Miss Darcy to flee the country, as the root of the misunderstanding was that she was apparently Lune’s target instead.
What an oddly specific coincidence.
And when the time came that Will wished to propose to Kym, he knew exactly where to take her - right back to that place.
One of the now many places only they knew.