Work Text:
One: The “Walk In Naked While He’s Working” Prank
The scene is set. His phone is ready to record, he’s fresh from the shower, and he shaved everywhere. Best case scenario of this prank was being “punished” for interrupting his boyfriend while he was working, and boy, did Jimin enjoy being punished.
Worst case scenario would be getting a grimace and a “Not now, baby, I’m busy.” Which, granted, wasn’t that bad, but where was the fun in a failed prank? Nonchalance towards an elaborate prank means nothing on the Internet, Jimin knew what people liked: the drama of an unpredictable reaction. The juicier, the better.
Jimin looked at his reflection in their bathroom. His pastel pink hair was still fluffy from being towel-dried, tips still dripping here and there, and he was flushed from the steam. He bit his lip, shook off any remaining reservations, held up his phone and pressed record.
“I’m going to try the naked prank on my boyfriend,” he giggles at his reflection. “My boyfriend’s working in the other room, so let’s see how he reacts!” He pans the camera to point at his feet where the towel around his waist pools, before opening the door to find his target. Luckily the door to Yoongi’s home studio was open. He points the camera at his hyung, who was busy piecing together some samples for a vocal guide. Music played at a friendly volume from the big speakers by his desk, so all he had to do was raise his voice a little to catch his attention.
“Hyungie,” Jimin calls.
“Mmm.”
“ Hyung. ”
“Yes, Jiminie? I’m a little busy right now,” Yoongi replies without spinning his chair to look at him.
“Yoongi-hyung, look at me please?” Jimin says in that voice, the voice that always tugs at Yoongi’s heartstrings and makes him bend to whatever Jimin says. “Please, hyungie?”
Yoongi chuckles at his boyfriend’s persistence. If he was trying to get his attention in the middle of work, it was probably important, or an internet thing. He pauses the track and spins his chair around. “Baby, what’s up, why are you—”
Well, shit.
“Jimin-ah…”
Jimin puts a hand on his hip, camera still aimed at Yoongi. He quirked an eyebrow and smirks, awaiting a positive reaction.
Yoongi looks him up and down, biting his lip a bit, and sighs. “Baby, you’re going to get cold standing around naked like that.”
Jimin deflates a bit, but he can still save this, right? “You don’t like what you see?”
With the change in tone of his boyfriend’s voice, Yoongi gets up from the chair. “No, no, no, Jiminie, I love it, I promise!” He moves close to hold the younger man, jostling the phone in his hand. “I just don’t want you to catch a cold.”
“I didn’t expect this reaction from you at all,” Jimin giggles, shaking in Yoongi’s arms. “You’re too wholesome for the Internet, hyung!”
“Wait, is this an internet thing?” the older man says, holding Jimin tighter and shaking him. “You were expecting me to react like a pervert and jump you, is that it?”
“Pretty much, but I love this reaction too,” Jimin laughs, hugging him back, recording forgotten.
“No, we have to do it again, I don’t want your followers to think I’m a boring old man who’s not hip with internet trends,” Yoongi says, letting go and sitting back at his desk. “Go, go out and come back in again, my reaction will be better I promise.”
Jimin does as he’s told and throws his head back in laughter. When he goes back in, he doesn’t actually press RECORD but points his phone at his hyung to humor his effort. What happens next… well, it’s a good thing he never caught anything on camera.
He uploads the original version instead, cutting it together nicely so everyone sees just how lucky he is to make Min Yoongi smile the way he did in the video, gums pink as his cheeks and aglow with affection.
***
Two: The “Dress Up Like You’re Supposed to Go Out on a Fancy Date and Ask Him if He’s Getting Ready To Leave Yet” Prank
Jimin watches himself pose in front of the mirror one last time, resplendent in Date Night clothes. To him and Yoongi, there were three kinds of Date Night: a date night in, which meant sweats, a home-cooked meal and some drinks, and reruns of home development shows playing as white noise to lull them both to sleep; Date Night, which meant going out wearing cute yet sensible clothes, something easy to move in, in case they ended up dancing or walking around town with the possibility of polaroid photos as mementos; and Date Night, which entailed going all out with the outfits and going to a fancy restaurant, ending with Yoongi’s hand on Jimin’s thigh the whole ride home and passionate lovemaking in their bed. These kinds of dates were special, and rarely unplanned because both of them worked hard and liked to treat themselves harder. Every detail had to be perfect, seamless, organized.
So, of course, this would be the perfect prank.
Before he showered and got ready, he set up his phone on a level in their bookshelf facing the couch, where Yoongi was. Judging from his online activity, he was most probably not taking a nap, so it was a good time to spring it on him.
Jimin gives himself one last approving look, from neatly-coiffed hair, to his white silk shirt—unbuttoned just enough to put his clavicles and silver daisy necklace on display— and dress pants that hugged his ass just right, and finally to his ankle boots, the ones Yoongi bought for him on their first anniversary, the ones with the gorgeous snake detailing at the crown of the heels.
He looks expensive. Showtime, the younger man thinks, schooling his expression to love-laced impatience. “Hyung?” he calls, making his way to the living room.
Sure enough, Yoongi is there, reading glasses on, a psychology book in hand. His other arm cradles his head as if the throw pillow under it wasn’t soft enough. Jimin hesitates because Yoongi is a picture of relaxation right now, and he’d hate to make the man anxious, but he’s too far gone to back down now. “Yoongi-hyung?” he repeats, walking into the camera and his boyfriend’s view. “I’m ready, what time did you say we were leaving again?”
The face Yoongi pulls is priceless. He squints at Jimin, then at the ceiling, trying to understand what his boyfriend is asking him. “What do you mean, baby? Why are you dressed so nice?” He dog-ears the page he’s on and shifts so he’s up on his elbows.
“You said we were going out on a date tonight, hyung?”
“W-what?”
“You said we were going out tonight,” Jimin smiles. “Look, I dressed up really nice for you, hyung. You said it was going to be a special night, so I even wore the boots you bought me,” he goes on, adding a little twirl for extra measure. “Am I dressed right? Or do you want me to change?”
Yoongi looks at him long and hard, chewing on his lower lip… and then nods. “Yeah, no, that’s perfect, Jimin-ah. Give me a few minutes to get ready.” He walks towards his boyfriend to give him a peck (Jimin hopes he doesn’t notice his confusion at how calm he reacted). “It’s going to be hard to coordinate outfits with you tonight, you look so pretty, but Hyung will do his best.” Once Yoongi is gone and the shower starts running, Jimin stares at his hidden camera in disbelief.
Did… Did he actually plan something tonight?
“Wait, wait, I’m so confused…” Jimin hisses, plopping down where Yoongi was on the couch. “Hyung looked confused, but then… huh? I’m confused!” He agonizes over his botched prank and panics—did they actually make plans and both of them forgot? Was Yoongi also pulling a prank on him? “What the fuck? What the fuck!”
Jimin loses track of time because soon enough Yoongi emerges from their bedroom looking downright edible: he’s wearing a black shirt (one button tastefully undone) under an ash grey pinstriped suit, the one that Jimin helped him pick out, the one that hung off him perfectly. His hair was partially slicked back, some bangs artfully falling around his left brow, small silver hoops glinting in the light. On his right middle finger was a matching silver rose. The younger man couldn’t help but gulp.
“Is this okay? I wanted to match your necklace, but I didn’t have anything floral, so I wore this instead,” Yoongi asks, waving the hand with the ring on it. “If it’s tacky, I’ll leave it here.”
“I—It’s perfect, hyung,” Jimin chokes out. God… how’d he get so lucky?
“Well,” Yoongi said, pocketing his phone and reaching for the keys, “if we’re all set, I think we can go. Have you been waiting long? Are you hungry?”
It was a losing fight. He couldn’t take it anymore. “Hyung, we’re not going out.”
“Wha—”
“It’s a prank, we’re not…” Jimin says, shaking his head, watching for signs of accidentally pissing the older one off. “There’s no date. I’m just joking.”
Silence.
“Hyung, please say something, I’m so sorry for making you anxious, I won’t do it again, I pro—”
Jimin’s apology is muffled by Yoongi hugging him. Wait.
Yoongi is hugging him?
“Hyung…?”
“Oh, thank god we’re not actually going on a date, I had no idea where to take you!” Yoongi laughed, still hugging him. “You have no idea how badly I wanted to scream in the shower because I was scared I’d actually forgotten, because I’ve been so busy lately. I’m sorry, baby.” He lets go and peppers kisses all over Jimin’s face, making the younger man giggle. “Ah, you made me so nervous for nothing, my little troublemaker. I hate that I can’t actually be mad at you.”
“Hyung, you’re not mad? It seemed like a fun prank but I’m sorry for making you anxious! And you dressed up really nice too!” Jimin whined, curling up to hide in his arms again. He inhaled Yoongi’s cologne. “But I don’t understand, you looked so calm? I got confused too!”
“It’s because my Jiminie looked so good, I’d hate for your effort to go to waste, so I acted cool but I was honestly freaking out in the bathroom.” Yoongi took Jimin’s face in his hand and squeezed his cheeks. “I’ll get you back for this.”
And Jimin was totally fine with that.
When the Tiktok is edited and finally uploaded, his following on the app and Instagram triples. The comments gush about how they wanted so much to be in his place, to have such an understanding partner who hardly ever got mad. They make him blush and feel fuzzy and warm. He locks his phone and gazes at Yoongi, asleep and so very warm next to him. “Ah, hyung…” he mutters, sharing air with the other man, “how are you this perfect?” He pouts and brushes some hair away from Yoongi’s face. The little scar left over from nicking himself while shaving a week ago is still there, and it makes Jimin smile for some reason. “Still so handsome even when you’re asleep.” He allows himself to stare a little longer.
“You’ll burn a hole in my face if you keep staring like that,” Yoongi groans, eyes still closed.
“Of course you’d be awake all this time,” Jimin laughs.
“Go back to sleep, Jiminie,” Yoongi grumbles. His arm snakes around his waist to hold him closer and he nuzzles into Jimin’s chest. “Think of your pranks when the sun is up.”
“No more pranks, I promise.”
“But they make you laugh. I like when you laugh, so keep doing it, you dumbass.”
Jimin’s hummingbird heart picks up the pace as he hugs Yoongi back. “Whatever you say, hyung,” he smiles. After a kiss is placed on the crown of Yoongi’s head, Jimin falls asleep as well.
***
Three: The “I’m buying something stupidly expensive using your card” Prank
Jimin smiles behind his cup of coffee. It’s a Friday, which means Yoongi’s workday starts a little slower and later. They’re at the table having brunch; Jimin’s got a kimchi omelette and some toast on his plate, but he’s been picking off bits of ham from his boyfriend’s fried rice.
“You should have asked me to make you some more, we still had extra rice from last night,” Yoongi says, taking some toast and tearing off a bit.
“Eating off of someone’s plate makes food taste better, hyung.”
“That makes no sense.”
“It does to me.”
What Yoongi doesn’t know is that Jimin has set another prank in motion. He’s got a camera up and recording somewhere, and he was actually excited to see how this one would turn out because this one took a little more planning. And it had something to do with money (well, not really), which he was sure would stir Yoongi up at least a bit. He glanced at his phone. 10:05. Pretty soon his friend would call, and the show would begin.
Sure enough, his phone rings. The display name has been changed from “Han Seulgi” to “Customer Service,” which catches Yoongi’s eye. He raises an eyebrow at Jimin, to which the younger man only replies with a shrug.
Jimin takes the call and puts it on speaker before saying hello. “Good morning?”
“Good day, am I speaking to Park Jimin-ssi? ”
“Yes, how may I help you?”
“Hello, Park Jimin-ssi, this is Ahn Mirae from GUCCI’s Customer Support. I just wanted to clear some things up regarding your payment details. ”
Jimin looks up at Yoongi, feigning surprise. Yoongi mouths “What’s going on?” at him, to which he shrugs. “Yes, of course. Is there anything missing from the details I typed?”
“We just wanted to make sure of some things before we go through with your transaction because of the cost of your item. We’ve had some instances of some customers inputting incorrect information before, so I wanted to call and confirm some of these details with you, just in case. Would that be okay? ”
“Oh, uh, sure.”
Yoongi mouths, “What did you buy?”
“Thank you. Your product was the Houndstooth V-Neck Jacket in White, correct? ”
“Yep, that’s the one.” Across the table, Yoongi nods and goes back to his fried rice. “Ah, wait—how much was it again? I kinda forgot.”
“The Houndstooth V-Neck Jacket is 3,990,348 KRW, excluding international handling fees and shipping, Park Jimin-ssi. ”
Yoongi chokes. Jimin only shushes him. “Ah, yes, thanks for reminding me.”
“That’s so expensive, Jiminie,” Yoongi muses. Damn… who knew making videos on an app for strangers on the Internet could pay so much? He schools his expression into one of amusement. Jimin deserved nice things, so an expensive jacket bought on a whim shouldn’t surprise him too much.
“I’d like to confirm if the card details you entered were correct? The card registered is a certain Min Yoongi-ssi’s card, yes? ”
“Wait—”
“Yes, that’s correct,” Jimin replies, to which the customer service representative says thank you and asks him to hold the call. He looks up at his boyfriend, whose mouth is agape, and offers an apologetic smile. “I forgot to tell you, hyung…”
The older man rubbed his face. “Jimin-ah, that’s… a very expensive jacket…” he says. “Very expensive. Like… crazy expensive. I don’t know if I have that kind of money for clothes.”
“But hyung, I really want that jacket.” Jimin gives the man his best puppy eyes. “I wanted to use my card for it, but I had to pay off the rest of my streaming rig, and I wanted to set aside some money for Taehyungie’s birthday too…”
Before his boyfriend could get a word in, the representative came back on. “All right, Park Jimin-ssi, we have confirmed your order, you shall receive tracking details and an invitation to join our exclusive mailing list soon. ”
“Okay, is there any more information you guys might need?”
“No, that will be all. Thank you for taking this call, Park Jimin-ssi, we’re excited for you to have your item! Have a great day. ”
The call ends. Yoongi sighs. “Again: that’s one expensive jacket, Jiminie.”
“I really wanted it, hyung.”
To his surprise, Yoongi reaches over to stroke his cheek. “You know what… you’ve worked really hard recently, babe. And it’s been a tough year. Don’t worry about paying me back. Enjoy your jacket.”
“R-really? You’re not mad?”
“No, I’m not mad,” Yoongi replies, pinching his boyfriend’s cheek. “Doing these videos must be stressful, sometimes people can get really mean over small things online, and it could get to you on a level that I don’t understand as easily because our jobs are totally different. I do behind-the-scenes work, but you have to face all these strangers every day.” He stands and goes over to where Jimin is. “My Jiminie works so hard, so maybe buying him a stupid expensive jacket is worth it.”
Jimin wants to say something but Yoongi is leaning in to kiss him on the lips, and who is Jimin to refuse a kiss from the man with the biggest heart in the world. “I love you, hyung, you know?”
“Mmm, I know. I love you more.” Yoongi gives him one last peck and goes back to his seat. “But you better get me a PS5 on my birthday,” he jokes.
At the end of the day, when Yoongi’s brushing his teeth and Jimin’s rubbing night cream onto his face, Jimin confesses that it was yet another prank. “I wanted to tell you earlier, but you started getting really romantic, hyung!”
“You’ll be the death of me, Park Jimin,” his boyfriend whines, toothpaste foam around his lips. “I almost had a heart attack, imagine if I’d died? That would be the silliest thing: Min Yoongi Dies Over An Overpriced Jacket.” He spits while Jimin laughs and heads to their bed. “And you’d be ruined as an influencer.” He joins Jimin, sliding his arm underneath the younger man’s head as if it’s muscle memory. “Imagine the articles. ‘Famous Content Creator Park Jimin’s Boyfriend Dies of Heart Attack.’ Then people will make conspiracy videos about you, saying you were actually abusive and had no love for me whatsoever.”
Jimin giggles. He places a hand on Yoongi’s chest and taps his fingers to match his heartbeat. “Ah, they’re going to stitch together clips of my videos and zoom in on how you made a face in one of them, so of course you were never my boyfriend, you were actually just my hostage.”
“That Gucci jacket was the final nail on my coffin,” Yoongi says in a narrator-like voice. “The Houndstooth Jacket of Death.”
The younger man shakes in laughter. “Rest in peace, baby!” Jimin says, raising a hand to cover Yoongi’s eyes. “I only ever wanted you for your bank account!”
The older man laughs and takes the hand, pressing a kiss into the little 13 tattoo on his wrist. “I thought you wanted me for my body?” He keeps kissing random areas on Jimin’s forearm, and then transfers to nip at his neck. “I thought I was your sexy arm candy, Park Jimin?”
“Hyung !” Jimin squawks, holding Yoongi closer as he giggles.
***
Four: The “Not-So-Mean, More of Secretly-Just-Recording” Prank
The last Tiktok Jimin uploaded got a lot of attention. Some good, some cute and very supportive, while others… well . Let’s just say that the negative comments on his appearance were actually more welcome than what they were currently saying. He felt off the entire morning, choosing more to binge watch some movies than to do his usual daily routine of planning content, or streaming with friends.
Today was a mental health day.
Yoongi knocked on the half-open bedroom door with a concerned expression. When Jimin invited him in, he kicked his house slippers off and climbed into bed to snuggle. “Would you like to talk about why you’re so down today, baby? Or would you rather we talk about something nice and funny for a bit?” he asks. “I can help you with either. Or if you’d just like to cuddle for a bit, that’s fine, too.”
Jimin just curls up next to him, sighing. “It’s nothing serious, hyung. Just… some really nasty comments. But it’s fine, nothing I can’t handle.”
Ah, so that’s what this is. “It isn’t nothing if it’s bothering you this much, Jiminie.”
“But they’re just strangers online. Their opinion shouldn’t matter that much.”
“That doesn’t make it less painful.” He kisses Jimin’s nose, and then forehead. “Can I borrow your phone for a bit? Mine’s still charging, I wanted to look something up.” Jimin hands him his unlocked phone. The wallpaper makes Yoongi smile: it’s a candid photo of them laughing. One of their friends must have taken it—Jungkook, probably, because the photo was edited to look like it was shot with a disposable camera. He remembers the moment as if it was yesterday; remembers how he and Jimin said I love you at the same time for the first time, recalls how the other man’s hair was orange at the time, and how pink his cheeks were when he realized what had just happened.
He clicks over to Tiktok and hits record, making sure that Jimin didn’t know. He holds the phone at an angle close enough that people can see his boyfriend laying on his chest, one that keeps his face slightly out of frame.
“I don’t know, hyung… People keep saying that I don’t deserve a boyfriend as nice as you. That you deserve someone who’s better, someone who doesn’t mess around. It’s just… What if they’re right? Do I even deserve you?”
“You don’t deserve me, baby,” Yoongi says. He feels Jimin tense up.
“D-Do you want to break up with me?”
“No. You don’t deserve someone like me. You deserve someone better , and I’m going to keep trying to be that ‘better man’ that you deserve, Jiminie. They’ve got it backwards.”
Jimin raises his head, tears in his eyes. He doesn’t even notice that Yoongi is recording. “Yoongi-hyung…” His pretty face twists into a grimace as he starts to sob, dropping back down to hiding in his boyfriend’s chest again.
“Ah, no, baby, please don’t cry! I didn’t mean to make you cry, I wanted you to smile,” Yoongi says, trying to comfort the younger man. He coos at him to get him to calm down, using his free arm to hold him and rub his shuddering back. He types out a quick caption, hits POST, and exits the app.
The two spend the rest of the day together in bed, sharing kisses and stories. They talk about everything and nothing in particular. Jimin rubs his boyfriend’s toes with his own absentmindedly, lost in how Yoongi’s hands gesticulate when he talks, and Yoongi is just as besotted; Jimin’s face is always so expressive, his brows creasing together and raising as the stories go by.
Jimin checks his profile later at night, when Yoongi’s in his little studio, deciding that a day off was probably enough and that he’s feeling way better already. He doesn’t expect to see more comments on a new video he had no idea was uploaded from his account. He clicks on it and watches the 28-second clip of Yoongi saying that he didn’t deserve a man like him, but he deserved better, and loses track of how many times he loops the video.
He’s so in love and it feels perfect.
In the other room, Yoongi gets a text message.
From: Park Mochi <3
Hyung you posted that video :<
I love you so much.
He smiles, takes off his headset, and replies.
From: Min Mandu-hyung <3
Did it make people mad again?
From: Park Mochi <3
I don’t care rn, I just care about you!
I’m just
Really happy. You make me happy, hyung.
I love you!!!!! <3 <3
From: Min Mandu-hyung <3
I love you too, Jiminie.
I’m happy I get to make you happy.
If that goes viral tho, I’m marrying you
Just kidding lol
I’d marry you regardless.
From: Park Mochi <3
HYUNG
I
Are you
IS THIS A PROPOSAL
From: Min Mandu-hyung <3
Do you want it to be?
Because getting married to someone Internet-famous might get me better music projects, hmmmm….
And you’re very pretty
Sounds like a fair deal, I guess
From: Park Mochi <3
HYUNG I-
What do you mean “I guess” >:(
Come to bed and kiss me hyung and maaaybe i’ll think about it!! >:*
From: Min Mandu-hyung <3
Coming, baby.
Love you. :)