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In a world where humans were descended from birds, Shen Yuan and his brother Shen Jiu were swans. Shen jiu had a fickle temperament which was predictable for their breed but Shen Yuan was gentle. 

On a day that started out like any other, Shen Yuan was just completing his daily stroll when he saw his brother, Shen jiu along with his Qi-Shimei and Liu-Shidi conversing with each other in soft tones.

It was a weird enough occurrence that he had to take a look.

“Jiu-ge, Qi-shimei, Liu-shidi. How rare it is to see you on Qing Ding Peak.” … together . Shen Yuan finished in his mind.

“Hmph.” Liu Qingge, a rather pretty hawk, said shortly, looking a little embarrassed as if he’d been caught doing something strange. 

“Ah! Yuan-shixiong is here!” Qi Qinggi clapped her hands In delight with the look of someone who’d finally seen a person with whom she could share some gossip. 

Shen Yuan was intrigued. He liked gossip.

“Shixiong, do you see that over there?” Qi Qinggi pointed to the valley below their mountain. Shen Yuan took a look but just shrugged when he couldn’t spot anything more than the scenery below.

“No! Yuan-Shixiong, don’t be daft, Shimei means THAT.” She pointed her arms a little more purposefully at the distance and Shen Yuan rolled his eyes as he again took a look. 

Shen Yuan had to quickly cover his mouth with a fan to keep from looking like a gaping fish. There was… a man!! On a pole! In… a circus costume? 

Shen Jiu crossed his arms. “He’s at it again.”

“Again?” Shen Yuan repeated weakly.

Shen Jiu snarled, “that boy has been coming to this forest every week now to dance in that ridiculous outfit.”

“Dance…?” Shen Yuan’s voice was choked.

Liu Qingge shook his head.

"If he wants to dance, why doesn’t he do it on a pole tree passed down from his ancestors? Coming to the mountains to use our abandoned one… isn’t it too much trouble?"

Shen Yuan gave Liu Qingge an incredulous look. Weren’t any of them… weirded out? Liu Qingge was treating it like it was perfectly reasonable to find a pole to dance on out in the open. 

Then it hit him. 

He’d thought this world was just using birds as an excuse to have really intricate wings on everybody!! Did the bird stuff extend to… mating habits as well? Shen Yuan shuddered. He’d always been interested in weird animals and critters so he’d done quite a bit of research on a few in his past life. He seemed to remember there were a few types of tropical bird in that world that basically, uh, danced on poles? In order to woo a mate? 

So it stood to reason that in this world certain humans would do the same. 

Wait! Then what did that mean when Yue Qingyuan, their sect leader who was a peacock , always had his tail feathers displayed when Shen Yuan and his brother came to see him??

Ugh, some things were just too weird to think about. 

“Be reasonable, Shidi. Not all children have access to their ancestor’s tree pole.” Shen Yuan chastised Liu Qingge absentmindedly, still trying not to gape at the man who was now gliding to the top of the pole and, oh god, was he trying to balance on top of it?? 

He didn’t notice Liu Qingge’s weird blush. 

“Oh! The man’s reached the top! Looks like he’s going to start! Hush, now, hush!” Qi Qingqi excitedly waved her hands to make her point and then settled down in amusement to watch the proceedings. 

Shen Yuan subtly looked around and then nearly tripped over himself when he saw that the majority of the students from Qing Ding peak were shirking their duties in order to watch the man dance. Some of them were smirking, already making fun of the poor guy. No one looked surprised. 

On the other side of the valley on Bai Zhan peak, he could already see those students doing the same. A few were even hovering in the air to get a better view. 

This poor guy! Was he really going to perform in front of all these students?? If he wanted to attract a cultivator sister so badly why not go dance at the abandoned pole next to Xuan Su peak?? The man was pretty good looking, actually the most handsome man Shen Yuan had seen, so he shouldn’t have any problem with attracting one of those beautiful sisters. 

The man now stood on the pole. He took a deep breath and then flashed a painfully hopeful smile to his audience of cultivators. 

Then he began his dance.

Shen Yuan could feel literal black lines appear on his forehead. What was with this… dance? It wasn’t even coordinated let alone sexy! This guy… didn’t he even bother practicing before performing??

Qi Qingqi and Shen Jiu burst out laughing as if finally being fed the punchline for a particularly well-loved joke. 

“He-h-he’s even worse than last time!” Qi Qingqi gasped between her laughter. 

Liu Qingge scrunched his brows tighter and muttered. “We should report this to the sect leader so he can chase this intruder off the mountains.”

“Let’s watch him struggle a little longer.” Shen Jiu snickered into his fan. 

Shen Yuan shot his brother a dirty look. Why was his brother always so mean about some things!? Shen Yuan had to hide behind his own fan to ward off all the terrible, terrible second-hand embarrassment he was feeling on behalf of this poor fellow. It was truly very hard to be a bird of paradise wasn’t it? Was this the only way this man could attract a mate? 

Shen Yuan took a subtle look around the mountain and felt even worse for the guy when he realized many of the students were laughing in ways similar to Shen Jiu and Qi Qingqi. At least some of his disciples like Ning Yingying were showing proper decorum and refrained from laughing. 

He cleared his throat. “It’s not… so bad. He’s quite handsome, don’t you think? With some more practice I’m sure he’d be… better.”

Liu Qingge gave him a complicated look. “You like it?” 

A pause. “It’s not completely hopeless. Shixiong thinks that man is truly trying, and, in the end, that is what remains important.” 

Liu Qingge snorted dismissively. “Trying doesn’t count for much when you can’t win.” 

Well, that was maybe true. But Shen Yuan also thought it was true that winning wasn’t possible at all without trying. So his point still stood! This poor man was so earnest in his dance, terrible though it may be. And apparently this was not the first time he’d come here to do it! He had to know people were laughing at him, right? Still, he was persistent and even now kept shooting hopeful looks at his assembled audience, waiting for someone to be interested enough to approach.

It tugged on his heartstrings. 

Finally coming to a decision, Shen Yuan spread his wings and jumped.

He maneuvered himself slowly and angled his wings to glide smoothly down to where the poor man was still dancing on that pole. His spastic gyrating spead up in earnest when he noticed Shen Yuan approach and he seemed to put a lot more enthusiasm into his moves. He was probably worried that he was about to be asked to leave the mountain. Well, Shen Yuan wasn’t Liu Qingge or Yue Qingyuan. 

Instead he said. “Excuse me, young one.” because up close he could see that the man was pretty young. There was no spiritual energy in him so he must be a mortal meaning his age was truly as it appeared. 

“P-Peak Lord Shen Yuan! This lowly one is honored.” The man stopped his dance for a moment in order to try bowing to Shen Yuan. He was still clinging to the pole with his wings spread a bit to maintain his balance.

Shen Yuan didn’t bother to ask how the young man knew his name. Lots of the humans down below the mountain always talked about the sect. “I couldn’t help but notice your… technique.” Shen Yuan pointed out. 

The human’s face turned bright red. “This one’s name is Luo Binghe! If my dance has interested Peak Lord Shen, please let me perform more! This one promises Peak Lord Shen will not be disappointed!”

So saying, he eagerly started trying to do some daring acrobatics, swinging around on the pole like he was trying to kill it. 

Shen Yuan was quick to put a stop to this. “No, no. This Peak Lord has seen quite enough.” He just wanted the guy to stop dancing so badly! To make sure no one would continue laughing at him. But now that he’s here, Shen Yuan couldn’t very well be honest and tell him his dance sucked! So instead he compromised. “The dance was very… interesting. But it can use some refinement. Perhaps, this Peak Lord could show you some pointers? This one is a swan after all, and although we aren’t as talented in, er, pole dancing...” God, was it getting hot up here??? “... we are very good at dancing on water.”

There, that should be good right? Shen Yuan basically told this poor Luo Binghe that his dance was complete garbage but at least he’d offered some help. This shouldn’t make the guy too upset, right? 

He checked the man’s face for a reaction. 

Wow… this guy… was really thankful for some help, huh? 

Shen Yuan was finally able to convince Luo Binghe to get off the pole. 

Shen Jiu, Qi Qingqi, and Liu Qingge watched from the mountain as Shen Yuan flew Luo Binghe gently but firmly to Qing Ding Peak. As they passed by the trio, Shen Yuan explained to his brother, “We’re going to be using the dance studio for the rest of the evening, Jiu-ge.”

Shen Jiu was too stunned to respond as Shen Yuan took the pathetic man who couldn’t pole dance to save his life to their studio.

Liu Qingge didn’t look much better. His expression was thunderous but there was a soft hint of confusion that escaped when he whispered, “But his dancing was so horrible.” 

Qi Qingqi looked between both men, to the pole that stood abandoned amidst a crowd of shocked disciples still trying to make sense of what happened, and finally to where Shen Yuan was guiding a red-faced human into Qing Ding Peak. 

Finally, she concluded, “Eh, maybe not. Looks like it worked pretty fucking well.”