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With a tinge of promising endings and hopeful beginnings, December made its great, freezing entrance in Seoul. The city had always welcomed the frosty month in the festive spirit, much like the other Northern parts of the world. From hanging garlands in storefronts to draping light strings over the sidewalk trees—you'd never miss the fact that it was here, the time of the year where you feel a little more in love with all things moving and breathing.
One might be head over heels for how the leafless branches contrasted against the lively blue sky, knowing it would soon be replaced with bleak sunless skies. The prospect didn't put a damper on one's love for the season, though, not when he was brought to the world in its loving, albeit cold hands.
Jaehyun was a lovely winter baby. All his life, he was told it might have something to do with being born on the day of love. He was full of love, yes, but he always believed it all came down to the overflowing affection he was welcomed with, which poured into him and filled him with utmost warmth despite it being one of the coldest days on that year’s winter. From his first day, he only knew the kind of love that was strong and persevering, the kind that never left you shivering in the cold, biting wind. He was full of love, yes, but his body had always given him a hard time objecting to what the heart had provided for it.
Wrapped in a thick fur jacket and a pink beanie, Jaehyun continued his brisk walk to the store, chastising himself for getting lost in his sentimentality when he could barely fight the full-body shiver.
So much for a winter baby.
Not five minutes later, the sight of a parked blue bicycle came into view. His boot-clad feet brought him closer to the bike and where its owner had been waiting for his arrival. Jaehyun walked into the vintage glassware store next to his vinyl store, coffee in his hands and wonder in his eyes.
The morning sun filtered in through the spotless window, glinting off the glass pieces and casting glitters on the wood-paneled walls. The sheer brilliance of the whole store coming alive was breathtaking, though the hitch on his breath was for an entirely different reason.
Sat right in the middle of the glistening crystals was him, glowing bright without the need for shiny surfaces. A star in the center of his own solar system.
Distantly, Jaehyun swore he could hear the choked sound and the boisterous laughter of his roommate, Jungwoo, the second he finished the thought. He sent an eye roll to the image of his cackling friend. Fine, maybe he got carried away in his romantic tunnel vision.
He stood his ground, however, because he knew whoever happened to be in the same room as the Kim Doyoung would share his sentiment. He was just that luminous. And gorgeous. Absolutely charming.
Wha-pshh! went the sound of phantom Johnny whipping through his daze. Jaehyun shook his head. At this point, he wouldn’t be surprised if his friends were all living inside his head.
Jaehyun came up to the oak table on the back of the six by five meters space. He gently put down the steaming cup of citron tea on an empty spot between the scattered papers—sales report—Doyoung was sifting through.
The older looked up and greeted him with a soft smile. Jaehyun returned the smile before crossing to the standing heater, putting down his iced coffee on the acrylic chair beside it, and rubbing his hands together.
“I hate winter.”
Doyoung paid him an unamused stare, pointedly directing his eyes to the clear cup of brown liquid, “Yet there you are, drinking your iced coffee, on this fine winter morning.”
If there was one thing distorting his view of Doyoung’s iridescent self, it would be his hard-to-impress trait—which had been proven to be his strongest, especially when it comes to Jaehyun. After almost a year of being store-neighbors with Doyoung—and half the time harboring a big fat crush on said neighbor—Jaehyun had learned to live with the offhand remarks or as Haechan once told him, the “roasting”.
“And no, you don’t. It’s been less than 24 hours since you proclaimed your absolute fondness for ‘the season of love’, right here on this table,” Doyoung pointed down his finger. “Ring a bell?”
“Nope. Must be Sungchan. He seems to be the type to spout things along those lines.”
“I would remember if it was him.”
“Oh... You would?” Jaehyun hid his crestfallen face by turning his back on Doyoung, under the guise of picking up his coffee. Just because you like him, it doesn’t mean you can control who and what he likes.
“Mmhm. I mean, you know. Once he gets comfortable with people, he starts throwing around jokes a lot. Really funny ones too.” Doyoung chuckled before blowing on his tea to sip it slowly.
Jaehyun brought his own drink and the chair over to the table. He settled down next to Doyoung who reflexively turned his body towards him.
They were so used to sitting like this every morning—facing one another in their quiet corner of time and space, carved exclusively to fit for two, Jaehyun and Doyoung. They've built their safe space around each other, instinctually, as if there was an innate force gravitating them toward each other’s orbits. As if once they were to go against it, the laws of nature as we know would collapse into chaos.
“If Sungchan ever goes on about the beauty of bare branches or falling snow, I’d probably die of shock. That boy was far from being mellow—unlike someone I know,” Doyoung pulled the edge of Jaehyun’s beanie on his forehead and snapped it back swiftly.
“Ow,” whined the frowning boy who immediately rubbed the itching spot. The offender made a face before focusing back on his drink.
They went into a comfortable silence; Jaehyun finishing the last of his coffee and Doyoung checking the rest of his papers. There was time left before they had to open their stores, and as usual, they soaked in the comfort of each other’s presence, like a device charging its battery for a day of service.
Curiosity got the best of Jaehyun as he noticed a dark blue box with gold ribbons, perched on Doyoung’s far side of the table, “What’s that box over there?”
“Chocolates,” he reached for the box and handed it to Jaehyun, “You can take it if you want.”
“I thought you don’t like chocolates.”
“Hence the offer.” Doyoung scratched a finger on his eyebrow, “Haechan left it for me in my room. It’s probably one of his gag gifts or something.”
Jaehyun scrutinized the light package in his hand, turning on its sides warily, “I’d take it, but are you sure it’s… safe?”
“I know he’s one hell of a troublemaker—” “That, he is,” Jaehyun piped up, “—but I also know he will never harm his brother in any way, even when I am being the annoying one," he shrugged, "He’s got a soft spot for me.”
“Good for you. Good for him too, I guess. No idea if it’s good for me.” Jaehyun lifted the top carefully to peek inside, revealing the contents to Doyoung once he took a sniff of the delicacies, “At least he’d eaten some, so it’s probably safe.”
Upon the sight of the assortment of pralines, the two men were fixed on two different things—Jaehyun on choosing which ones looked the safest, while Doyoung was puzzling over the initials and the heart shapes stamped onto them. The latter was hit with realization right as Jaehyun popped one of the pieces with a cursive ‘SC’ into his mouth.
“Speaking of my dear brother, would you like to join us set up the tree tonight? He’s coming over with food and another company later.”
Jaehyun squinted at Doyoung, “Who? Don’t tell me it’s Sungchan. Again.”
“It is him,” Doyoung nudged him with his knee when he sighed exaggeratedly, “Be nice to the kid, okay?” The start of a smile pulled the corners of his mouth, “He needs us on his side.”
“His side on what? Doyoung, what are you talking about?”
If Jaehyun weren’t as enamored as he was with Doyoung, he wouldn’t think twice to wipe off the cryptic, knowing smile on the latter’s face. Like so, his hands were tied, and possibly chained too, with the key in the possession of one Kim Doyoung. When the figurative key bearer stood from his seat, Jaehyun had no choice but to follow and let the man guide him towards the exit with a grip on his shoulders.
Halfway to the front door, Doyoung chirped from behind him, “You’ll see.”
Jaehyun pushed against the hold on his shoulder to meet his eyes, “You’re not gonna tell me?”
“No,” replied him in a playful lilt.
At the door, Jaehyun made a full stop and turned to block the other from pulling the handle, “Then I won’t play the good hyung with him anymore.”
“Ugh, you’re such a pain in the ass,” grumbled Doyoung as he slipped his hand between Jaehyun’s torso and left arm to reach behind him. The maneuver caught Jaehyun off guard, leaving him back in Doyoung’s control and out the door in a second, “You’ll know once you see it, okay? Go tend to your store and come back for lunch. There’s this new taco place I’d love to try. Are you down?”
“Of course.” Trying to redeem his temporary loss of charms, he put on his sweetest, dimpled smile and winked, “I’ll follow you wherever you want to go.”
Doyoung gaped at him before snapping, “See? You say that, and you expect me to believe there’s anyone cornier than you? Get out of here!”
Evening fell on Seoul with a drastic drop of the temperature, sending most of its dwellers to find warmth inside their abodes and the stragglers outside to zip up their jackets tightly. The street where the side-by-side vintage shops were at had never been short of people roaming around, even after the sun had been gone for hours and half the stores were closing up.
Jaehyun’s vinyl store was one of the firsts to flip their closed signs, usually around 8 o'clock. Tonight was no different. Jaehyun made the rounds of turning the heater and the lights off at fifteen before eight, whistling carol tunes and picking up his warm apparel. After locking up, he jogged the few steps to where the pavement was flooded in soft, yellow light from the store next to his. He pushed open the wooden door to the chatting voices of Doyoung, his college-senior brother, Haechan, and—the corner of his mouth twisted bitterly—one of Haechan's close friends, Sungchan.
“Oh, you’re here!”
“Jaehyun hyung!”
The two brothers greeted him simultaneously, while the last person threw him a bright smile and waved his chopsticks, “Hyung, we got you jeyuk-bokkeum, your favorite.”
“I told you, it’s not,” hissed Haechan before turning to him, “Hyung, you like samgyeopsal more, right? We always eat it when we hang out, and since I’m your favorite dongsaeng, you’re always treating me with your favorite food.”
Sungchan snorted, “Jeno would laugh at your face if he heard that.”
“Jeno would laugh at your face because you’re wrong and I’m right.”
Sidelined by the two bickering friends, Jaehyun exchanged a tired look with an equally fed-up Doyoung. Upon reaching where they sat down on the carpet by the oak table, he took notice of their sitting arrangement. Doyoung, the first to have seen him come in, had his back propped against the wooden cabinet on the far wall, while on his right was Haechan who sat facing the table. To his dismay, the last of the bunch had occupied the only place where Jaehyun longed to be—on Doyoung’s other side where the gap between him and Sungchan was a teeny-bit smaller than the one with his brother.
Well. At least he got to stare at Doyoung’s face throughout dinner. He'd been doing so, until Haechan’s call of his name broke his reverie, “Which one is it? Jeyuk-bokkeum or samgyeopsal?”
As his eyes flitted back to the man in front of him, Jaehyun caught Doyoung mouthing ‘Both’ to him. So he answered, “They’re both my favorites.”
In true dramatic Haechan fashion, he heaved a sigh and shook his head, “I’m not taking that answer.” He intercepted Doyoung as he was handing the bowl to Jaehyun, pulling it towards him, “You can’t eat until you pick one.”
Doyoung groaned, “Oh, God. Jaehyun, I’m sorry you have to deal with these children because of me. If only you hadn’t moved next door all those months ago. Your life would’ve been so much better without knowing them.”
“Yeah, but it would’ve been the worst,” retorted his brother, “Because he wouldn’t have met the love of his life.”
Trust Haechan to throw a curveball when you least expected it. The kid should come with one of those warning signs atop his head: “Beware of Well… Just Beware”
Jaehyun barely had time to keep his cool before he could dodge the next throw.
“Whoa, hyung. I didn’t think you could get any paler than you are, but— Wow.” This was by Haechan, as expected.
“Seriously… Hyung, you're so pink all over… so this is what Jeno and Doyoungie hyung meant when they say you’re a human peach.” This was by Sungchan. God, save him before he does something ugly to this boy, Jaehyun prayed. He shot a glare to the clueless boy when he reached out his long arm to touch his cheek.
Before Jaehyun could stew in his mortification any longer, Doyoung, his knight in shining armour, declared, “Playtime is over, children. Stop teasing Jaehyun or I will ban you from coming here for the rest of your lives.”
Like a true sibling, Haechan was unaffected by his threat. “Right,” he drawled before turning to Jaehyun again, “But I was talking about your store, hyung. I think I remember you saying it is the love of your life… Or did I mistake it for something else…”
Oh, he was screwed. Going out with Haechan, Sungchan, Jeno, and Jaemin that one time was a mistake. His experience in drinking had been lost to the young boys’ enthusiasm, turning him into a useless drunk who spilled out his whole life story the entire night. The crew was beyond excited for the opportunity to obtain any piece of blackmail material on the oldest. In the end, they took home the biggest catch of the night with Jaehyun’s profession of love for a certain hyung they were all up close and personal with.
It'd been a month since then, yet this was the first time any of the boys had brought up and dangled the knowledge over his head. Jeno and Jaemin would be loyal enough to keep his dignity intact, but with these two—who was smiling rather fondly with each other—were they not arguing earlier?—he couldn’t try to guess why they had to bring it up now, after all this time.
Haechan’s voice brought him back from his befuddled thoughts, “Anyway, I still need the answer. Samgyeopsal or jeyuk-bokkeum?”
“Samgyeopsal,” mumbled Jaehyun in defeat. The faster he could end this torture, the better. He had his head down ever since Haechan dropped that bomb out of nowhere, too flustered to look at Doyoung and in turn, seeing his reaction over the mess he became.
As soon as the answer got out of his mouth, Haechan howled over his victory and lunged towards Sungchan, gripping him into a headlock. At least, he tried to before the bigger of the two reversed their position and tackled Haechan to the floor, giggling sounds filling the air.
A snort came from across Jaehyun, pulling his attention away from the peculiar sight. It wasn’t that he’d never seen the two fooling around like this—he’d seen too many to know they never sounded this happy while doing it. He expected Doyoung to have the same puzzled look as he did, but surprisingly, he could only find amusement and a hint of something softer, one reserved for his brother, but only when the other wasn’t looking at him.
When Doyoung caught his gaze, Jaehyun threw a confused frown at him, mouthing ‘What’s going on?’, because clearly, he was the only one who wasn’t in on the joke. There has to be a joke somewhere, right?
Doyoung, still with that soft smile, only gave him a shrug before sliding the previously-confiscated bowl of stir-fried pork towards him, leaving Jaehyun to assess the strange situation by himself. He kept glancing back to the two boys who were still—wrestling?—cuddling?—on the floor and the man across him who was munching on his food like he wasn’t witnessing something unusual.
What the hell is going on here?
For the rest of the night, Jaehyun grew increasingly more suspicious of the other occupants in the room. There was nothing out of the ordinary as they started sorting through the boxes of Christmas ornaments and light strings, each person occupied with their own tasks. Jaehyun was in charge of untangling the light strings, while occasionally chipped in words for Haechan to write on the greeting cards. Doyoung and Sungchan were left with picking out and hanging the ornaments on the tree, which Doyoung decided would be green-and-silver themed for this year. They were behaving quite normally, but Jaehyun could sense the smell of secrecy lingering in the air among the artificial scent of pinewood and the traces of their spicy food dinner.
About halfway through decorating the tree, Sungchan brandished a palm-sized sun dusted in gold glitter and asked Doyoung, “I know there’s a color theme going on, but can we have this on the tree, hyung? This one is Haechan’s favorite.”
Doyoung sneaked a glance at the person who allegedly fancied the glittery object, “Oh, so you remember which one is his favorite.”
“Of course,” Sungchan blurted in a higher tone of voice than he normally used. He awkwardly cleared his throat and peeked at the boy who currently had his head down, writing beside Jaehyun. In a strangely gentle voice paired with a twinkle in his eyes, Sungchan asked no one in particular, “Why wouldn’t I?”
Wait a minute, Jaehyun thought to himself. Once again, he seemed to be the only person in the room left in the dark. Noting how redder Haechan’s ears grew by the second, the return of that knowing smile on Doyoung’s lips, and the tentative reach of Sungchan’s hand to pluck a written card from the pile near Haechan; Jaehyun had an inkling of what lies under the shroud of mystery he'd yet to solve.
“How about… like this?” Sungchan wondered out loud, inspecting his work on hanging the sun and the card right next to each other.
“It looks good for me. What do you think, Haechan?” Doyoung directed his question to his brother, leading everyone’s attention to the boy who was now as red as a tomato.
Despite his obvious blushing, Haechan managed to speak in his casual manner, “It’s perfect,” with a smile—soft, yet blinding enough to compete the sun.
The exchange of shy smiles that followed served to conclude Jaehyun’s observation with a resounding Eureka!
jaehyun (10:27 PM):
so
haechan and sungchan
jaehyun (10:28 PM):
they're dating
Doyoung (10:29 PM):
yup
can't believe I didn't see it sooner
and they were so obvious too
jaehyun (10:30 PM):
HOLY SHIT
all this time
I thought sungchan was into you LOL
Doyoung (10:31 PM):
no way??
jaehyun (10:31 PM):
yeah
kinda see the kid in a different light now
Doyoung (10:32 PM):
huh
is that why
jaehyun (10:32 PM):
why what
jaehyun (10:33 PM):
doyoung?
Doyoung (10:34 PM):
nevermind
Doyoung (10:35 PM):
anyway
just watched the news
they said it's going to snow next saturday
jaehyun (10:36 PM):
really?
that's great
we’ll get to see the light show in the snow
heh it rhymes
Doyoung (10:36 PM):
wait
light show?
and we? as in you and me?
jaehyun (10:37 PM):
yep
bought the tickets earlier
Doyoung (10:37 PM):
without asking me?
jaehyun (10:38 PM):
I’m asking now
jaehyun (10:39 PM):
so? light show, chance of snow, saturday go?
Doyoung (10:39 PM):
no
jaehyun (10:40 PM):
doie :(
Doyoung (10:40 PM):
what
it Rhymes
jaehyun (10:41 PM):
but :(((
Doyoung (10:45 PM):
jaehyun
jaehyun (10:45 PM):
yes doie?
Doyoung (10:46 PM):
will this be a date?
Doyoung (10:49 PM):
i can see you typing
Doyoung (10:50 PM):
answer this second or im sleeping on you
jaehyun (10:51 PM):
if you want it to be a date then sure
Doyoung (10:51 PM):
wtf
give me a definite answer or im blocking your number
Doyoung (10:52 PM):
are you asking me out on a date?
jaehyun (10:53 PM):
Jesus
Yes, Kim Doyoung
I'm asking you out on a date
jaehyun (10:55 PM):
I'll have you know you are no different than your brother
Doyoung (10:58 PM):
I'll have you know I took that as a compliment
Doyoung (10:59 PM):
he could get a boyfriend just fine by being himself
if its any indication
I might be getting one for myself in the near future
jaehyun (11:01 PM):
...
are you
jaehyun (11:02 PM):
are you saying what i think you're saying
jaehyun (11:03 PM):
doyoung
doie
jaehyun (11:04 PM):
hello?????
jaehyun (11:07 PM):
do you enjoy torturing me like this
are you happy
jaehyun (11:10 PM):
:(
jaehyun (11:15 PM):
i changed my mind
you are worse than your brother
Doyoung (07:01 AM):
you’re so dramatic
Doyoung (07:02 AM):
also
Yes
I’ll go on that date with you
Saturday arrived in what was probably the coldest it had been this year. Aside from hearing it from Doyoung, all the news lately was about the forecast of the first snow. Jaehyun felt his heart fluttered at the reminder of what was about to happen in a few hours. He'd recounted the unexpected development with Jungwoo that fateful morning when Doyoung had not-so-subtly turned his invitation to a casual outing into a date and agreed to it. After getting his fill of the day’s laughter, his roommate calmed himself before asking in a more serious tone, “Isn’t it about time?”
Calling him a ‘lovesick fool’ and laughing over his pining aside, Jungwoo was, for the lack of a better word, the best wingman he could’ve ever asked for. His question had knocked sense into Jaehyun’s head that, yeah, it was about time he confessed to Doyoung. With the ‘Sungchan problem’ solved—which turned out to not be a problem in the first place—and the slightest possibility of Doyoung reciprocating his feelings, Jaehyun had nothing else to stop what he'd planned to do tonight.
When they had their usual morning coffee—tea for Doyoung—the store owners had agreed to close their stores one hour earlier to commute to their first date location. Hearing the words ‘first’ and ‘date’ come out in succession from Doyoung’s mouth had the same effect as exercising on the treadmill to Jaehyun’s heart. If the latter was going through a similar crisis then, he didn’t show it. Which was a bummer because he'd thought Doyoung would be sharing his jitters about their first date.
After hours of overthinking and one too many reassuring phone calls with Jungwoo, Jaehyun prepared to close his store and march to the battlefield. You got this, Jungwoo’s voice rang inside his head. Right, he got this. With a last nod to himself, Jaehyun pulled open the wooden door of his store and stepped out.
Not a second later, Doyoung was also exiting and locking up his store next door. Their eyes met across the pavement and Doyoung was the first to give Jaehyun a smile, “Ready?”
Before he got to reply, Jaehyun was interrupted as Doyoung spoke up with a frown, “Wait, wait. Is that all you’re wearing? Where’s your scarf?”
He looked down at his outfit—his usual pair of Chelsea boots, black jeans, blue velvet puffer jacket, and his winter essential, a beanie—before he replied unsurely, “Uh, I don’t have one. Why? Do you want to… match?” Jaehyun eyed the checkered muffler secured around Doyoung’s neck.
“Match?” Doyoung repeated incredulously, “No, Jaehyun. I know you’re into that sort of cheesy stuff, but I was more worried that you’ll freeze your ass off out there.”
“Oh." He pulled up the zipper of his jacket to his neck, “Well, this jacket is the thickest and warmest clothing I have in my wardrobe. I think I’ll be fine.”
“You better be.” Doyoung fusses with Jaehyun’s beanie to cover the top of his ears, “Let’s go then.”
They took a taxi to cross the bridge over Han river, got off at a bus stop, and continued their way with the bus to lessen the cost. In less than an hour, they arrived at the park where people were flocking in to see the winter light show. All around them, from kids and their parents to people around their age were bundled up and stuck close together as they walked deeper into the park. Ever since they stepped off the bus, Jaehyun felt the wind pick up and gusts of cold air kept hitting his entire body. The smoke coming out from his breath got thicker with every passing minute, a telltale sign of how much the temperature had dropped.
Trying to keep his teeth chattering at bay, Jaehyun kept up his pace beside Doyoung, who was walking with his nose tucked into his muffler. The former momentarily forgot about the cold weather at the sight. Jaehyun would never dare to say this out loud, but with only his eyes and a portion of his cheeks peeking out, the older’s resemblance to a bunny was more striking than ever.
How could the cold ever get to him when all he felt was warmth and a surge of affection for the man?
Of course, not everything his heart believed in would get the stamp of approval from his body. With a particularly strong gust of cold air slapping his face, Jaehyun couldn't keep his shivering and started to bounce lightly to stave it off. When he was busy thinking of ways to make it not obvious that he was freezing, the snow decided it was the perfect time to start falling from the sky.
“Look, Jaehyun. It’s snowing!” Doyoung exclaimed beside him. Jaehyun kept his eyes on Doyoung as he chuckled in excitement and raised his palms to catch the falling snowflakes. He was once again attacked by the swarm of butterflies at seeing Doyoung’s crinkled eyes and hearing his tinkling laughter.
This is it, Jaehyun. Seize the moment.
“Doyoung.”
“Hmm?”
Achoo!
“...Jaehyun?”
Achoo!
“Oh, God. Jaehyun.”
“Hmm?” Sniffles.
“You’re shivering.”
“N-no, I’m not...”
Instead of giving him a response, Doyoung heaved a big sigh and inflicted his hardest glare on Jaehyun. If he wasn’t in the middle of feeling another sneeze coming, Jaehyun would’ve noticed the ‘I told you so’ plastered vividly across Doyoung’s face. After his third sneeze, Jaehyun opened his mouth to reassure him that he was fine, but was beaten by Doyoung who had unwrapped his checkered muffler and stepped into Jaehyun’s personal space.
“Doyoung, you don’t have to—” he didn’t get to finish his sentence as Doyoung started wrapping the thick fabric around his neck, the emanating scent of jasmine robbed him of his ability to form words.
“Jung Jaehyun, I’m not going to listen to anything you have to say. You’re cold, so I’m trying to warm you up before you sneeze the life out of yourself.”
With one last tug to ensure his neck was all covered, Doyoung shifted his eyes up to Jaehyun’s face, noticing the red tip of his nose before pulling out a hot pack from his pocket. “Don’t sneeze on me,” he warned before gently covering Jaehyun’s nose with the pack.
Jaehyun found his eyes collided with Doyoung’s worried ones. The slight furrow to his eyebrows washed ashore the pang of guilt for becoming a burden. “I’m sorry, Doyoung,” his voice came out muffled over the first aid setup Doyoung was giving him.
Doyoung cast a small smile and shook his head. He moved the hot pack from his face, inserting it back into his pocket before taking a look at the time on his phone. “It's about fifteen minutes before the show starts,” he peered on Jaehyun’s face, “do you think you can hold out for that long?”
Jaehyun looked around at the crowd. Most of them were still in the midst of rejoicing over the snow, the excited chatter and laughter drove him deeper into his guilt. He had to try his best not to further ruin the mood, so he nodded, “Yeah. If we keep moving, I think it’ll be fine.”
They continued their walk around the park, hands inside their pockets and silence between them. Doyoung looked up once in a while, both awe and concern apparent in his features. The snow had started falling faster and piling up over every surface. A thin layer of white frost piled on top of Doyoung’s uncovered head. As Doyoung brushed it off, Jaehyun noticed the slight shake to his hand before it disappeared back into his pocket.
What was he thinking? Of course, Doyoung would be cold too now with his muffler gone.
“Hey, Doie?”
“Hmm?”
“We can share the muffler if you want…” Jaehyun trailed off when he was met with another disapproving glare from Doyoung, “...or not.”
“Just keep it on you, Jaehyun. I’m fine,” he huffed. “I can’t believe you don’t own any scarves when you’re so allergic to the cold.”
“I’m sorry.” Jaehyun pouted into the muffler.
“Stop apologizing, Jaehyunie. Come on, where’s your smile?” Doyoung teased as he gently pinched on his dimple peeking from the muffler. “In case you needed a reminder, this is our first date,” he emphasized by linking their arms and pulling Jaehyun closer.
The two magic words and Doyoung’s sudden closeness did remind Jaehyun of what tonight was all about. It was a date and yet, Jaehyun was being dumber than his usual self, which was already a lost cause. He didn’t get to confess, but at least he could make tonight a pleasant and memorable first date.
Putting on his best smile, Jaehyun was ready to make amends for his earlier slip-up. He turned his gaze towards Doyoung who had been waiting for their eyes to meet. Their breaths mingled for one, two seconds before…
Achoo!
Oh, no.
They stopped in their tracks when Doyoung sneezed for the second time, still holding onto Jaehyun’s arm while he bowed his head into the crook of his elbow.
When Doyoung looked up, his nose was turning red as he sniffled, “I think I’m a little allergic to the cold too.”
They ended up taking shelter in the little cafe near the park’s entry, their only view of the light show was the dancing beam and shadows that escaped the peak of the trees. Jaehyun ordered hot americano and Doyoung a cup of green tea. They didn’t get to spend their date the way they planned, but with their bodies warm and the pleasant company they provided for each other, Jaehyun thought it was still a memorable date, in a way they’d look back and have a good laugh over it.
Now he only needed to figure out how to confess properly—preferably without any sneezing involved.
About a week after the date, Doyoung surprised Jaehyun by popping into his store at 4 p.m., four hours before he was supposed to leave his own store.
“Hey, Doyoung. What brings you here?” Jaehyun put down the book he was reading and got up from the sofa in the corner.
“Hey…” Doyoung walked deeper into the store, hesitance slowing his steps, “I was thinking, are you super busy today?”
“As you can see,” he raised his empty hands by his sides before inserting them into his jeans’ pockets, “I’m not at the moment. Do you need any help?”
“No, but thank you for asking, Jaehyunie.” He shuffled his feet, shifted his glance behind Jaehyun’s shoulder, and mumbled, “You’re always so considerate.”
The truth was, ever since their snowy (and sneezy) date, a shift in their relationship started to grow more palpable by the day. Jaehyun first noticed it when he brought their usual morning drinks the day after said date.
With his eyes always stuck on Doyoung, of course Jaehyun would’ve noticed anything unusual about him.
That morning, in a manner quite similar as just now, Doyoung hardly met his eyes when they were talking. It wouldn’t have raised concern if Doyoung hadn’t always been so attentive to him, even when he spoke nonsense most of the time.
Doyoung wasn’t the only one showing some changes. As previously mentioned, Jaehyun had always loved to admire the sight that was Doyoung. It went way back to their first meeting when Doyoung entered the mess of boxes in his then-new store, bearing a welcome gift of a little crystal ball which sat in his display window ever since. But that was a story for another day.
Today, about nine months and a post-date week later, Jaehyun had committed each feature of Doyoung’s face so vividly into his memory, courtesy of how intense he'd gotten with his staring.
He'd used to avert his eyes not long after Doyoung caught his gaze. Now, it was as if someone had placed a reverse Uno card, making Jaehyun the one who sought Doyoung’s eyes on him and Doyoung the one who did anything but.
His staring was only the beginning of things that changed. For his part, he believed his subconscious was pushing him to act on his feelings by being more forward. Jaehyun was no stranger to saying something ‘corny’. The only difference now was they all came from the bottom of his heart; the mellow in him throbbing alive.
“I’d be glad to help with anything, anytime, for you.”
Then, Doyoung brought upon a novel sight which made its debut alongside his aversion to eye contact. A blushing Doyoung ran his fingers through his hair and asked haltingly, “If you’re not busy… Do you want to close your store early and... and come with me?”
“Come with you to…?” Jaehyun waited, eyes still diligently taking Doyoung in.
“Just come.” As if he was struck by a bolt of courage, Doyoung looked straight into Jaehyun’s eyes, half confidence and half uncertainty in his own, “You said you’ll follow me wherever I want to go.”
Jaehyun, with a voice as sure as his heart, affirmed, “I do.”
So they left. Jaehyun let Doyoung lead the way, walking to the bus stop, getting on the bus, and stepping off at the stop near Han river.
“We’re going to the river?” Jaehyun asked Doyoung as they walked through a parking lot for the river park’s visitors.
Doyoung nodded and glanced at him, “There’s something I want to show you.”
Jaehyun hummed as they fell into step, their shoulders bumped with every step.
The weather was warmer than it had been last week. Though as they got closer to the river, the wind picked up and swept through their hair. Jaehyun didn’t wear his beanie today, but wrapped around his neck was the checkered muffler he hadn’t washed and returned to its rightful owner.
“You’re wearing my muffler.”
Jaehyun touched the referred piece of clothing, slightly sheepish to be caught wearing something he didn’t own by its owner himself. “As soon as I wash it, I’ll give it back.”
A light chuckle took flight from Doyoung’s lips, “You can keep it.” He reached out his hand to pull the muffler higher up Jaehyun’s neck, “This way, I know you’ll always stay warm.”
Their gazes met for a second before Doyoung looked straight ahead, while Jaehyun let his eyes linger. The pinkish hue of the sky washed over Doyoung's features, painted him all softened edges and delicate surfaces. He always loved staring at Doyoung’s face, not because he was superficial, but because he found familiarity in it, and that brought him comfort. Doyoung brought him comfort.
After following down the trek for a few minutes, Doyoung stopped in front of a stone bench overlooking a row of shrubs with blooming yellow flowers lining the railing. From where they stood, the stretch of the city and the river became a contrasting background against the spattering of yellow petals. Jaehyun was about to ask Doyoung the name of the flowers when he heard his name.
“Jaehyun, come sit over here,” Doyoung called from his seat on the bench.
He went over to sit beside Doyoung’s left. “How did you find this spot? We’re practically the only ones here.”
“I go down here every Monday,” Doyoung waved a hand in the direction of apartment buildings to their right, a little further behind the line of cherry trees. “My place is only ten minutes away.”
“It’s beautiful here.” Jaehyun pointed at the shrubs in front of them, “What are these flowers called? I didn’t know there are flowers that could bloom in the middle of winter.”
“I know as much as you, but I think they're called winter jasmine.” Doyoung turned in his seat to face Jaehyun, his knees knocking into Jaehyun’s as he shook his head, “But they’re not the reason I brought you here.”
At that moment, Jaehyun found himself frozen in place. No, it wasn’t because of the cold this time. It was because of how the soft rays of the setting sun fell right onto the man in front of him, how he glowed, eyes twinkling like a pair of diamonds; it was because of how beautiful the sunset looked on Doyoung.
Doyoung shifted closer to place his hands on Jaehyun’s shoulders, guiding him to turn to his left as he said, “I wanted you to see that.”
'That' was the ball of red descending closer to the horizon, an inch above the ridge where the Namsan tower stood high. The exterior glass of skyscrapers reflected the sun's orange-red glow, the shadows rippling as it was moving slowly to hide behind the mountains. They watched as the sun turned from a half-circle into just a strip of red before it disappeared completely.
Doyoung was the first to break the silence, speaking in a low voice behind Jaehyun, “There’s also something I want to say to you.”
Hearing that, Jaehyun swiveled round to face Doyoung, his eyes zeroing in on the older who was agitated.
“I’m tired, Jaehyun.”
“Huh?” Jaehyun blinked confusedly.
Doyoung huffed before he took a big breath and said, “I’m tired of feeling your eyes following my every movement. I’m tired of being flustered all the time. I’m tired of not looking at your face because I might just drop everything and kiss you. I’m tired of waiting for you to say what we both know you wanted to say. So please, do it now before I’m prying it out of your mouth myself.”
Jaehyun, rooted to his seat and still blinking repeatedly, took a few seconds before registering Doyoung's last sentence. As he came to, Jaehyun grasped both of Doyoung's hands in his.
Doyoung hissed at the touch, "Your hands are cold." He was frowning, but his hands were busy rubbing warmth into Jaehyun's.
Distracted by the instant thawing of his insides, Jaehyun lost his train of thoughts. What am I supposed to do again?
Confess, you idiot! Frustrated shouts from Jungwoo, Johnny, and probably everyone he knew rang inside his head.
So Jaehyun braced himself, here goes nothing.
“I like you, Doyoung. I like you since you walked into my store with the cutest smile I’ve ever seen. Then you gave me the most precious welcome gift and I fell. I fell, Doie, and it hurts. It hurts whenever you come back to my store and ask me to have lunch together. It hurts whenever I bring our drinks to your store in the morning and see you sitting at that table. It hurts because all I want to do is hug you, kiss you, have you whenever I see you. It hurts, but your hands are always there to heal me. You’re always there to take care of me. So if you allow me, Doyoung, I want to be the one to take care of you too.”
Jaehyun ended his confession slash emotional rambling by lifting their entwined hands to plant a kiss on the back of Doyoung’s hands. As he looked up, Jaehyun was met with Doyoung’s raised eyebrow and the knowing smile he always wanted to kiss away.
“Is that all you’re going to kiss?”
Jaehyun felt a chuckle bubbling out of his throat as he inched forward to close their gap. Doyoung was looking at him right in his eyes, open and expecting. Their noses bumped each other softly. Jaehyun brushed his nose against Doyoung’s, causing a hitch to the older’s breath.
As Jaehyun tilted his head, he whispered, “Bossy.”
Like everything else with Doyoung, kissing his lips brought Jaehyun comfort. The first kiss was chaste, their lips meeting briefly. The second was a lot more trusting, with Jaehyun’s lips coaxing Doyoung’s mouth open and him getting his first taste of Doyoung. Jaehyun felt a smile hiked up the corners of his mouth before Doyoung pulled him into another kiss, so deep it drove him breathless as their lips parted with a smooching sound.
Glancing at Jaehyun’s swollen lips and dazed eyes, Doyoung laughed before he ducked his head and bit his lower lip. “I like you too, Jaehyun, so much that I’ll let you take care of me when you can’t even take care of yourself.”
Jaehyun was about to refute his last statement when out of nowhere, the start of a sneeze tickled his nose.
Achoo!
"Bless you.” Doyoung piped up, which met with a sniffle and a mock glare from Jaehyun. He chuckled before rubbing his hands together, “It’s getting colder. Should we go to my place?"
"How many times do I have to say it?" Jaehyun said as he stood up and reached for Doyoung’s hand. Once they stood facing each other, Jaehyun pecked Doyoung’s cheek and whispered, "I'll follow you wherever you want to go."