Work Text:
“You’re too kind, Otose.” It’s the first word that Katherine says when she sees Otose wrapping presents.
Otose takes a cigar to her mouth and inhales deeply. “ She’s right, probably, ” Otose thinks. After all, she had been involved in all sorts of problems before because of her caring and selfless nature.
“No one’s died of kindness before,” she answers, as she takes three objects out of the big box next to her and puts them on the table. She chose a decorated bag and bow from the pile she bought earlier and put the sukonbu, the Otsuu figure and the box of chocolates inside.
“It’s caused me so many problems before,” she thinks. “but I suppose it’s all worth it.”
Otose takes a new bag and sees how Katherine discreetly follows the movement with her gaze. Otose stubs out what's left of her cigar against the ashtray.
“Are you going to stand there watching all day?” She says, holding back a smile. Katherine has never been good at hiding how much she wants something. “I can't wrap your gift if you're here.”
Katherine instantly bristles, all her muscles tense and her expression halfway between anger, surprise, and embarrassment.
“It’s not like I want anything from you, old hag!” she yells, her accent becoming more pronounced than usual.
“Yes, yes, whatever you say. Go attend the bar, Katherine.”
Katherine turns around, ready to take the opportunity that Otose has given her, but true to herself, she doesn't forget to make a disgusted sound (“Hmp”) before leaving.
Otose waits until she no longer hears her footsteps, before taking Katherine's gift from the box.
Yes, it’s all worth it.
.
Gintoki gets the email from the Mimawarigumi's boss guy again. Honestly, he doesn't know what he has done to deserve to be on the contact list of the commander of a police force, but he wants out, please and thank you.
“ Gintoki, I am writing to wish you well this holiday season <3
I am doing good in my elite work, with my elite subordinates
I look forward to your well wishes as well!”
He leans against the back of the chair and puts his feet up on the desk, hears the notification of a new message, but ignores it. He takes the JUMP that he had discarded a while ago, puts it on his face and goes to sleep for several hours. After all, the holiday season is the busiest time for them and he’s determined to be well rested before he’s forced to deal with the pile of last orders time to arrive: buying gifts, delivering gifts to inhospitable places, finding someone, surprising someone ... Just thinking about it is already making him tired.
He closes his eyes.
New message.
He’s determined not to waste a single gram of energy on it. He shuts his eyes tighter.
New message.
The strawberry milk he drank earlier was absolutely necessary.
New message.
As if it would be that easy.
“Gin!” Shinpachi yelled as he yanked the door open. “You're lazing around again, we have to clean up!”
“Gin!” This time, Kagura. “It was you! It was you,wasn’t it?” She takes him by his collar, picks him up and shakes him in the air, his precious JUMP falling from his head to the floor with a thud. “Is it because I ate your strawberry ice cream?! Is that why?! Gin! Answer me!”
“Kagura! Let go of me!” Gintoki complains.
“I expected more from you, Gin!” She continues with the drama, crocodile tears sliding down her face. Finally she lets go of him and Gintoki falls heavily onto his chair.
“May I know what I did?”
Kagura picks up her phone with the screen on.
“This! You gave him my number!”
On the screen there is a message that looks familiar to Gintoki:
“ Kagura, since I have been given your phone number, I hope we can maintain a friendship by messaging <3 How are you feeling? Does your boss treat you well? I hope that during the holidays you can enjoy with your loved ones. I look forward to your response ” followed by at least three more notifications for unread messages.
“Gin, that's horrible,” Shinpachi says, being the traitor that he is, when he notices what the commotion is all about..
Enough. Gintoki snatches the cell phone from Kagura's hand and throws it straight at her head.
“Well, you shouldn't have eaten my ice cream!”
Kagura runs to hug Sadaharu, who is dozing on the couch, while she complains that she is not appreciated enough, that Gintoki is cruel, and that she has not been paid for months.
Shinpachi is giving him a disapproving look and shaking his head when they hear a knock on the door.
.
The silence on the way to the Shinsengumi barracks is only filled by Shinpachi's awkward ramblings, in a failed effort to ease the tension between Kagura and Gintoki, who tease each other every few meters. Kagura shows her cell phone's off screen and Gintoki responds reminding her that she has eaten hir ice cream.
Really, can't the Yorozuya be at peace for a full day?
He doesn't ask for more.
Just one day.
When they arrive at the entrance of the Shinsengumi and see that there is no guard, he has his answer.
NO.
“They must have gone home early today,” Gin says, his voice listless. Shinpachi doesn't think so.
He lets out a sigh and ventures along with his companions in what, judging by the amount of noise and the smell of alcohol that he begins to detect as they enter the premises, is a party at the Shinsengumi.
He holds the package in his hands tighter. Really, why did shy Shinsengumi admirers have to show up to ask them to deliver a gift just today?
They turn down the hall in the direction of Kondo's office. Shinpachi's hopes of making the delivery and leaving quickly grow instantly when he sees Hijikata standing halfway, in front of a closed door behind which the epicenter of the Shinsengumi party must be found. They just have to deliver the package to him and leave.
“Hijikata!” Shinpachi calls and picks up his pace. Gintoki and Kagura rush to follow him.
Hijikata turns to them.
“What are you doing here?”
His voice is steady! He's not drunk! Are the heavens smiling down at Shinpachi?
“Hijikata, we have been asked to deliver this package for the Shinsengumi, on behalf of your admirers.”
Shinpachi extends the package and Hiijikata takes it and superficially reads the note at the top, which is full of good wishes for various members of the Shinsengumi.
“What a terrible Vice Chief,” says Gin, in a contemptuous and playful voice, “imagine being so cruel that his own admirers are afraid to approach the barracks themselves.”
Kagura nods her head in support.
And Hijikata doesn't play along. He totally ignores them!
Shinpachi might cry.
“Well,” Hijikata says, turning to Shinpachi. “Thanks for bringing it.”
There is no Gin arguing with Hijikata, no Kagura coming to blows with Okita! There is no naked Kondo! It’s a Christmas miracle! Shinpachi knows better than to look a gift horse in the mouth so he quickly says,“You’re welcome. We're leaving now. Goodbye!”
He turns around and is about to start pushing Gin and Kagura's backs to leave as soon as possible, when the door they were in front of the whole time was yanked open.
“Aha! I knew it was them!”
The next thing that happens is that they are caught in the embrace of a very drunk Kondo and thrown into the large room in which, indeed, a celebration of catastrophic proportions is taking place.
.
The first thing Kagura noticed upon entering was the smell of sake and various types of food. There were three large tables filled to overflowing with plates and glasses, surrounded by what should be a good portion of the Shinsengumi's active staff.
“We have visitors!” Kondo announced, using the full force of his lungs, tightening his grip around Gintoki, Kagura and Shinpachi even more.
The entire Shinsengumi raised glasses filled with liquid in response to its commander.
As Hijikata closes the door behind them, she hears him mutter under his breath something that sounded suspiciously like “They are doomed.”
As they were dragged towards the head of a table, probably Kondo's, followed by Hijikata, Kagura noticed Shinpachi's look of regret and the interest with which Gin looked at the drinks.
This was going to be a long night.
Well, not that she cared.
She accepts the seat offered to her next to Shinpachi, who looks resigned to a horrible punishment, and confidently says, “Get me something to drink.”
Some members of the Shinsengumi, probably due to their intoxication, instantly obey her order.
Oh, she's going to enjoy every second of this.
She is about to have a glass full of sake when Gin, who up to that point had been accepting all the food that was put in front of him and complaining to Hijikata about his bad habit of putting mayonnaise on all of his food, stops her.
“No alcohol for you, girl,” he says. Kagura is tempted to ignore him and drink anyway, after all she is still mad at him for giving her number to the head of the Mimawarigumi, but she doesn't. She fakes a sigh, makes a comment about how old Gin is, and opts for a juice someone left behind.
“Bring me food,” Kagura orders. The same members from before obey and fill the area on the table in front of her with different types of meat and salads.
Satisfied, she begins to eat without hesitation until she is interrupted by a hand taking the chopsticks from her fingers. She clenches her fist and throws a blow without looking at the bastard who has dared to interrupt her, but he dodges her. Seeing as he managed to pull it off, he can't be anyone but the fucking sadist.
She turns her head and sure enough, there is Okita Sougo.
“Stop enslaving our officials, China. And stop eating everything on the table.” His tone is monotonous, as always, but Kagura manages to detect something there, a slight tremor in his voice that… Ha! He's drunk, or at least has a couple of glasses under his belt.
“I haven't forced anyone, sadist. And it was your boss who invited us to the party in the first place, ” she replies.
Okita looks towards Kondo, who now has an arm around Hijikata's neck, who looks a bit suffocated (much to the sadist's happiness).
“ Never knew you were the type to take advantage of a drunk man, China. How creepy.”
From there on, things escalate fast. Kagura tosses a plate of food at him and Okita narrowly dodges it. The members of the Shinsengumi begin to cheer and support them, each member choosing to take sides. Hijikata's protests for them to calm down are lost in the fervor of his subordinates’ drunken states. Shinpachi, in his resigned state, begins to collect the bets that have arisen almost immediately. Kondo bets half a salary on Okita and then starts laughing at absolutely nothing. Gin, on the other hand, yells at Kagura to win at all costs, because the stakes, surprisingly, are tilted in his favor.
Okita quickly takes several steps away from Kagura, draws his sword and takes a battle stance. Kagura curses having lost her umbrella sometime in the night, forcing her to limit herself to close-range attacks only.She clenches her fists and crosses the few meters that separate her from the sadist. She tries to kick him in the head, but he dodges and attacks her, targeting her stomach. Kagura spins and avoids the blow, then throws a punch, which (at last) hits his target. Another time, the sadist might have recovered from that attack. Not this time. The alcohol is finally taking its toll on his system. Okita swings, falls to the ground and those who bet on Kagura roar excitedly.
By the end of the night, she, Gin, and Shinpachi leave the Shinsengumi headquarters with more money than they have had in a long time.
.
They arrive at the Yorozuya almost at dawn. Gintoki faints almost the moment he touches the futon, Shinpachi spreads his spare futon in the living room, too tired to go home, and Kagura barely opens the door to the closet where she sleeps before following Gin's example and passing out. Sadaharu stays in the living room, leaning on the side of the couch, staring at the gifts Otose left them a couple of hours ago.