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Yoongi wasn't the type to regret things easily, but in that moment, he regretted. He regretted letting Seokjin nip to the shops while he made sure Taehyung and Jimin didn't do something stupid like light every tropical-scented candle they had and have a seance in the living room.
'I really don't think that should be going into your mouth'
'What's wrong with my Bloody Mary,' whined Taehyung, a slight pout forming on his face before blowing a strand of his blue hair out of his face.
'It looks positively repulsive, that's what. I can see literal chunks of tomato', said Yoongi. He eyed up the offending martini glasses lined up on the kitchen bar. 'I don't know who let you in the kitchen when it's a clear rule that only Jin and I are the only ones who know how to safely use the hob, the oven and the toaster. Taehyung, don't think I didn't see you using a metal fork to try and fish your toasted waffles out of the toaster the other day. A metal fork in a toaster-'
'Look, that's besides the point. It's the first night of freshers week and unlike you, I would like to expand my social circle and the best way to kick things off is with vodka. Not my fault you can't appreciate my mixology. Right, Jimin?'
Jimin was far too invested in his phone to notice his impending digestive doom. Those tomato chunks did not look appetising, Yoongi snorted and shook his head lightly. When was Jin going to hurry the fuck up and come back from the shops? He was already tired of making sure Taehyung didn't give them food poisoning.
'GUYS, I think Jungkook's gonna drop by later. Gah- I can't believe the kid's all grown up. Feels like it was only yesterday he was my little neighbour in Busan.'
'Bold of someone of your height and stature to be calling somebody small,' Yoongi said, biting back a grin.
'Yoongi, yah- you hypocrite. You cannot be talking about height, you squashed dumpling,' Jin interjected.
Yoongi whipped around to see Jin, juggling the key to their apartment and several Tesco shopping bags. Jin's eyes crinkled with glee, looking down at the shorter man.
Before Yoongi even had time to scowl at Jin calling him a dumpling, Jimin jumped out of his claimed spot on the couch to rugby tackle Seokjin with his arms wide open, pink hair flopping about.
'Man, I've missed you. I can't believe you spent the entire of the summer holidays back in Korea, leaving us in shithole England,' Jimin groaned, pulling back out their hug.
'I'm telling you- top 10 anime betrayals. You were eating homemade Korean food, while I was stuck here eating stale clearance tuna sandwiches. Seokjin, do you even understand my pain-' Taehyung sank to his knees, clutching his chest. Yoongi rolled his eyes and smiled at the pair; trust the performance arts students to be melodramatic idiots.
Truth be told, Yoongi had missed Seokjin's presence during the holidays. He missed waking up to the smell of breakfast cooking. He missed falling asleep to the routine Mario sounds on his Nintendo DS when Seokjin was playing it at ungodly hours. He missed doing the laundry together; only Seokjin knew the right amount of fabric softener to use. His clothes looked rumpled for the entire month Seokjin had been away. As much as Yoongi liked to deny it, he had missed his roommate.
Smirking, Yoongi said, 'Glad you've decided to grace us unworthy peasants with your presence.' His voice dripped with sarcasm but Seokjin cracked a squeaky laugh anyway.
'Now, THAT is what I like to hear- Now if you'll excuse me I have some unpacking to do,' Jin said, dropping the shopping bags promptly with a thud.
Jin halted at the sight of the kitchen bar, splattered with tomato juice which concerningly looked like a murder scene straight out of a Agatha Christie novel. Taehyung grinned sheepishly before hiding behind Jimin using him as a very poor human shield. Yoongi watched in amusement as Seokjin's eyes drew towards the martini glasses lined up and the dots connected. Laughter bubbled and pooled in Yoongi's chest at the exact moment Seokjin figured out what the squashed tomatoes were for became evident on his face.
'Please tell me that's not what I think that is.' Jin groaned in defeat. 'Just know that if I end up in hospital with food poisoning for the 2nd time, it's because I love you too much to refuse drinking your fucking weird cocktails.'
'You know what, I'm going to take that as a compliment. I love you too, Hyung,' Taehyung said as he passed the glasses round. Yoongi reluctantly accepted his fate as he took the cocktail glass from Tae.
'You can wipe that shit-eating grin off your face you bastard,' Yoongi said as his poor stomach churned in dread. Now you may be wondering why he was so concerned about this particular concoction of tomato juice, vodka and Worcester sauce and honestly God and Taehyung knows what. Well, fast forward exactly 6 hours and 17 minutes and ding ding that's right. We have 6 inebriated men all clamouring to be the next one in the toilet, desperately trying to keep their insides, you know....inside. Meanwhile, we hear echoes of Min Yoongi retching his guts out in the toilet. It's like Yoongi had suddenly developed a knack at predicting the future. A premonition, perhaps. That or he simply knew the capabilities of Taehyung's mixology. There's a reason why he was a drama student and not enrolled in catering.
Anyway, let's rewind 6 hours and 17 mins. Back to when Yoongi had accepted his ill fate.
As he started to raise the glass to his lips, his mouth seemed to fill with acid, pricking at the side of his jaw. That's when there was the familiar chime of his doorbell.
Yoongi's body involuntarily sagged with relief. Temporarily, saved by the doorbell it seems. The door swung upon to reveal the tall frame of Namjoon, frozen like a deer caught in headlights and in his hand, part of the handle.
'Namjoon, I swear to God, this is the fourth time you've broken my door handle. The next time it happens I'm going to shove it up your ass and then MAYBE it will teach you to stop fucking breaking my goddamn door,' Seokjin threatened, his voice warbling. His plump lips moved on their own accord and Yoongi thought that for somebody who can't rap (at least from what he's heard from the shower sessions with Nicki Minaj's songs blasting out loud) he sure does move his lips fast. He noticed Seokjin's lips often; they seemed to bloom on his face like a very ripe pink rosebud begging to be picked. This was information Yoongi's brain definitely didn't need to retain and promptly decided to compartmentalise into his brain as useless info.
'Kinky.' Hoseok popped his head, his orange hair bouncing, into the threshold of the apartment, trying to keep a completely straight face.
Yoongi choked. And he hadn't even tried the menacing cocktail in his hand yet.
Jimin hummed happily. 'Well now that Namjoon and Hoseok are here, we can really introduce Jeonggukie to the whole group.'
Welcoming new friends into their group had always been a joyous occasion. Yoongi thought back to the time it had only been Yoongi and Namjoon, struggling to survive with neither of them being particularly talented at cooking, cleaning or general maintenance in the department of life. It had been rough for Yoongi in that first year. His sound production course had been brutal and it usually meant late nights, unhealthy and possibly inhumane volumes of roasted instant coffee and scribbling melodies, chord progressions and lyrics until his brain was devoid of all thought process. To add more metaphorical fire to the metaphorical inferno that was first year at uni, Namjoon's existential crises at 3am were a regular spectacle in the Min/Kim household and quite frankly Yoongi decided it was time to get his own place minus the meltdowns, burnt ovens and philosophical debates about whether there is life beyond our solar system at 1am. He loved his best friend- of course he did. They had moved from Seoul to England together and Yoongi can vouch for a fact that nothing brings two men together more than puking their guts out together on an 11 hour flight. But Yoongi had also decided that moving out would do them both good. Branching out and stepping outside their comfort zone is exactly why he enrolled at uni. And that's exactly what he did. Funnily enough he moved out right into another Min/Kim household.
And as if Namjoon, read his mind, he said, 'The group's really grown huh? Soon it'll be what? Seven of us? Feels like yesterday that it was just me and Yoongi figuring out how to cook pasta by throwing it at the ceiling to see if it would stick.'
Yoongi snorted but his gaze turned fond watching the taller man. 'Good to know that you can still do Year One Mathematics, Joon.'
Taehyung cleared his voice. 'Ahem. I think this calls for a toast.' Raising his sludge of tomato flavoured vodka, he said, 'To the friendships we have made over the years and to the ones that we will make. Oh, and to finding the love of our lives this year! Cheers!'. He clinked the glass with Jimin enthusiastically and with one fell swoop, Taehyung downed the drink in one gulp. Easy peasy, lemon squeezy.
Except Yoongi's stomach rather felt like a lemon being squeezed to pulp: acidic and bitter.
He ignored the lurching bottomless pit at his stomach and the bad gut feeling that he passed off as indigestion from the late night ramen the day before. Unfortunately for the future Min Yoongi (precisely 6 hours 2 mins from now), the real indigestion was just starting. With a smooth motion he poured the questionable liquid into his mouth. Fighting back his primal instincts to hurl and potentially offend poor Taehyung, he forced it down as the sour tang filled his mouth. He looked to the right to see Taehyung chugging another one of his 'cocktails'.
'Jimin, I think I've found my true calling.' Taehyung smirked into his glass. Yoongi gaped- his body already seemed to be rejecting the drink as his stomach made concerning noises that resembled a mix between gargling water and humpback whale mating calls.
He reached for a bottle of pure vodka and twisted the cap off with a sense of urgency: anything to get rid of this vile and rancid aftertaste that made him want to sandpaper his tastebuds.
Seokjin watched in mild amusement and worry as the other downed shot after shot haphazardly. After being Yoongi's roommate of 3 years, Seokjin had learned many a thing about the enigma that was Min Yoongi. Things like the fact that Yoongi's preferred form of breakfast are hashbrowns, or the fact that his roommate is a secret manga hoarder. The first fact Jin came to know when he had spontaneously decided to try out a Tasty™ recipe and make his own hashbrowns because that was how his cooking worked: bursts of inspiration fuelled by sudden craving. Seokjin also watched in shock when Yoongi had taken a bite out of his hashbrowns and uttered some noises that could be considered R-rated, followed by colourful swearing about how his hashbrowns could make him cum untouched. To which, Seokjin responded by stuffing Yoongi's mouth with more golden hashbrowns.
Seokjin had found out the latter fact when he came home after a late shift from his part time job as shop assistant to find Yoongi sprawled on the living room couch, crying about the last edition of Haikyuu and how Kageyama, his self-proclaimed adopted child had grown so much. Another important fact Seokjin had learnt about his roommate was Yoongi's alcohol tolerance. Or rather the lack of it. It didn't take much before the younger man was sprawled on the floor, giggling away. So at that very moment, Seokjin watched as Yoongi gulped down shots of pure vodka desperately in the hopes of getting rid of the aftertaste of Tae's cocktail. Terrible idea, of course.
And that folks, was how Yoongi got completely and utterly wasted.
Nobody really knows how they made it into the club. Jungkook had joined the group somewhere between the moment they had left the apartment and the moment they had stepped foot in that godforsaken club. Yoongi remembered clumsily introducing himself and not throwing up on the poor kid. So that was a good start. Jungkook had that nervous energy around him; maybe it was the apprehensive look in his doe eyes or the way his teeth tugged at his lips. But it melted away as soon as he saw Namjoon trip over his shoelaces that had come loose, making Jungkook clutch his sides in an effort not to shake with laughter. Yoongi softened. It had only been a couple of minutes and Jungkook had already figured out that they were just a group of dumbasses trying to survive the gruelsome early years of adulthood. Smart kid.
Seokjin being one of the very few responsible adults decided to be stay sober in case anything happens. His plan of action was making sure that neither Yoongi or Taehyung weren't allowed any more drinks so he made his way to the bar to make sure the bartender cut them off. He shook his head lightly. Seokjin wasn't sure whether to be scared or amused by drunk Yoongi but that was a problem for Seokjin in a couple of hours when he's hauling Yoongi's giggly ass home. He let a soft smile form on his face. Tentative. But it's still there.
Somehow, Hoseok and Jimin had convinced Yoongi to join their dancing. He begrudgingly agreed, knowing full well he would look like an idiot with two left feet in the midst of the two dance students.
Hoseok grabbed his shoulders, shaking him left and right to the rhythm of the beat of the music. 'Loosen up, Yoon. We gotta get that grandpa posture of yours out of here,' He shouted directly into his ear, grinning wide and toothy. The music seemed to thrum through Yoongi's body and the bass made his insides buzz. Not a good thing considering the contents of his stomach: a dodgy Bloody Mary, several shots of vodka and a handful of salt and vinegar crisps he had nabbed off Jimin earlier.
Speaking of Jimin, he was currently grinding up against Taehyung who had also been dragged into dancing like Yoongi. For the first time in a while, he felt alive, moving sloppily, his limbs not quite in sync with his brain while Hoseok beamed at his attempt at dancing. Sure, his mind was clouded with tad bit too much alcohol to be functioning but in that moment with a sweaty Hobi grabbing at his arms to move them at his own accord like a puppet, he felt content. Maybe it's just the warm alcohol making him feel fuzzy but he really did. Yoongi was grateful to have such great friends.
That was until he saw Taehyung tearing Jimin's shirt off his chest. Yoongi might have been drunk off his ass, but he knew that indecent public nudity would be sure to get them kicked out and possibly banned. The thing with putting drunk Taehyung and Jimin in close quarters is that it ends in 3 ways: them boning, them arguing over the most pointless and petty things like dumplings for example or them professing their undying love for each other as soulmates for life. From the looks of Taehyung trailing kisses down Jimin's neck, it looked like this was going in the first direction. Yoongi knew that this night was fucked as soon as he accepted that bloody drink but the nail in the coffin was the incredibly loud moan that Jimin let out. We're talking a porn worthy moan that seemed to cut through the music and the crowd. The burly men in black that had kindly let them in were now watching as a certain cotton candy haired pair were quite enthusiastically making out half naked. In public.
Well, shit- they were fucked. Or more specifically, Jimin was going to get fucked. Just not now in the middle of a bar in public. Preferably in a closed room, with nobody else around. That would be the ideal situation. Yoongi groaned as he saw the bulky men slink their way through the pulsing crowd.
Now would be a fucking good time to find Seokjin, Yoongi thought to himself as he scanned the area for a certain broad shouldered man as he sees the bouncers of the club wrangle their way closer to Taehyung and Jimin, too engrossed in their liplocking to notice. His head pounded and honestly Yoongi didn't know whether the queasy feeling in his stomach was from the dodgy cocktail or the fact that he felt like he had more alcohol than water in his system was responsible for the light-headedness.
'Guys, I think I'm going to puk-'
Suddenly Yoongi was on his knees and emptying his guts out.
And oh God, he stared at the chewed up tomato chunks that have been regurgitated onto somebody's poor leather shoes. He looked up to see the surly face of a bouncer, his broken nose wrinkling and looking down at him in disgust.
Taehyung and Jimin had finally fucking stopped indecently making out in public to stare at the one and only Min Yoongi, knees in tomato vomit.
Shit.
All Yoongi can think off is 'Fuck Kim Taehyung. Fuck that guy.'
Too bad Jimin's already doing that.
Yoongi had never wanted to strangle Taehyung and Jimin more. His predictions had been right; they were hauled out of the club without a word. Seokjin tried to apologise profusely but to no avail as those beefhead bouncers manhandled Yoongi with sick all down his front. He got it though. Yoongi knew he would not be happy with somebody who had just regurgitated the entire contents of their stomach onto your ridiculously expensive Paco Rabanne shoes. It was a miracle that the bouncer hadn't made them pay for the property damage. Yoongi's hand itched to find Taehyung's neck but restrained; the boy was one of his mates, he reminded himself.
Yoongi lips tilted upwards as he shook his heard at their sorry party, stumbling home.
Hold on a minute.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5 including him.
Where the fuck are Tae and Jimin? Yoongi sighed in exasperation. Of course the horny fucks had managed to weasel their way out this mess to bone somewhere private. He made a mental note to have a firm talk with them both about consumption of dodgy homemade cocktails. But for now Seokjin's surprisingly warm and stable shoulder seemed to calm him down. The pitiful group trudged their way home and that was when it dawned to Yoongi. He stopped in his tracks, his shoulders shaking with silent laughter. It was finally dawning on him.
It was the first day back at uni.
They had been kicked out of a club.
Jungkook's first impression of him was that of a vomiting gremlin.
His shoulders shook more violently. They were so fucked for the rest of the year. Namjoon, who looked rather bleary eyed, seemed to be thinking the exact same thing.
'Jungkook, yknow what I am so sorry that your first night out was kinda ruined', apologised Joon, profusely.
'Are you kidding me? THAT WAS SO FUN? Hyung, let's get kicked out of more clubs,' Jungkook said, looking way too chuffed given the situation.
'Right! So the plan is to get Yoongi back to the apartment and shower him. Namjoon, can you make sure Jungkook gets home safe?' Seokjin shifted Yoongi in his arms; his arm was starting to a go numb from holding the smaller man for so long.
Seokjin didn't really know he made it back home, while simultaneously dragging an inebriated and grumpy Yoongi, who seemed to yell ominous threats aimed at Taehyung. There was something to be romanticised as he walked back to their apartment in the dead of the night. The cool air that had settled over the campus spurred Jin into a brisk pace.
Seokjin really didn't know he managed to wrangle Yoongi through the front door, out of his soiled clothes and into the bath tub. He looked down at the blissfully unaware Yoongi who had nodded off somewhere between making it past the doorway and into the toilet. Seokjin's eyes crinkled with affection.
Before brutally spraying him down with freezing water.
He almost felt pity for the younger, who jolted as soon as the almost glacial water made contact with his skin. That was until he remembered that he was the one washing a vomit-covered Yoongi. Key word being almost. Smoothing back Yoongi's wet hair away from his forehead, Seokjin shifted closer. After being roommates for 3 years, Seokjin had become used to the copious amount of near nudity from Yoongi; the younger had a tendency of forgetting to wear more than boxers in the morning. This fact however did escape his mind, as he looked down at a very cold, shivering Yoongi in his underwear. The cold water had brought a certain rosiness back to Yoongi's usually pale and milky skin. Painfully aware of their proximity, Seokjin averted his eyes to focus on washing the younger one's face. Drawing closer, Seokjin couldn't help but notice the dusky pink hue dusting Yoongi's cheeks.
Had Yoongi's eyelashes always been this pretty?
Said eyelashes twitched open, as if disturbed by Seokjin's gaze. Yoongi stared at Jin. Something flickered across Yoongi's eyes as he took in Jin, his apparent lack of clothes and the cold shower above: gratitude. He almost sagged in relief, against Jin for the 6th time today. He wasn't naked in some random stranger's bath tub. Seokjin was here. And he was going to be okay.
'Seokjin-' Yoongi tried to croak out a word of thanks, his throat sore from several activities, involving tomatoes, Paco Rabanne shoes and a certain Kim Taehyung to blame.
'Yoongi, you smell like shit. Shut up and let me finish washing you up.'
Yoongi snorted lightly and let himself close his eyes.
That was how Yoongi spent the night. With Seokjin towel-drying his hair with a worn towel that smelt like the fabric softener that he had missed so much.
And he would be damned if he had spent the first night of this academic year any other way.