Chapter Text
Naruto woke with a moan of pain.
Sadly, this wasn’t an uncommon occurrence. In fact it was actually rather common.
“Kurama…” He groaned.
“What did I do this time..?”
No response.
“Eughggggg” Naruto moaned. “Kuramaaaaaaaa”
The fox didn’t reply.
Deciding to take matters into his own hands Naruto leapt into his mindscape.
“Kuramaaaaaa” Naruto whined at the fox
“Kuuuurrrraaaammmmmaaaaa” Naruto whined louder.
“Kuraaaammmmmaaaaaa” Naruto started stomping on one of the foxes tails.
“What the hell are you doing brat!” Kurama snapped, finally waking up.
“What happened?”
The bijuu stared at him in disbelief.
“This is what you wake me up for?”
“Well… Yeah.”
Kurama snarled, slapping Naruto with his tails.
“Owwww.”
“Are you high?”
“Huh?”
The kitsune snorted,
“Whatever, we’re in the past.”
Naruto blinked.
Kurama threw him out.
Naruto blinked, now staring at tree canopies on his back.
Naruto moaned again, this time thinking about what Sakura would do to him.
The next time Naruto woke up he was in a white room.
He moaned for no particular reason.
A head appeared in his field of vision, silky black-brown hair falling into his face.
“Hi.” He said.
The face blinked at him.
Naruto pushed himself up.
The head receded and he turned to find one Hashirama Senju staring at him.
“Oh hey Shodaime-sama.”
Hashirama blinked at him slowly.
“I’m sorry what?”
Tobirama Senju walked into the room.
“Oh hey Nidaime-sama.”
Tobirama blinked at him.
“Oh, wait-”
Naruto blinked.
“Arghhhh.” Naruto groaned
Tobirama looked at him curiously
“I probably just ruined like 15 timelines…”
Hashirama looked at him concernedly.
“Sakura’s gonna kill me…”
Hashirama looked a little worried now.
“She’s going to bash me into the ground, and then she’s going to heal me just so she can break all my bones one by one.”
Tobirama looked concerned now.
“And then Kurama’s going to kill me.”
Hashirama looked prepared to call another medic.
“He’s going to bijuudama me into the past.”
Naruto released a semi-hysterical laugh.
“Or more into the past!”
Tobirama went back to looking curious.
Naruto finally looked up.
“Oh uh, yeah, I’m Uzumaki Naruto, time travel extraordinaire.”
Tobirama was definitely curious.
Hashirama looked at him like he was crazy.
Naruto continued on.
“Although I dunno if I can be called extraordinaire… This is my first time..”
“Are you okay?” The Shodaime cut in, or maybe future Shodaime.
“Well,” Naruto sighed, “Other then inevitable beatings from just about everyone I know I should be fine.”
Hashirama blinked again before clearing his throat, “Alright then..”
“You’re going to make a village.” Naruto didn’t know why he said that.
“Oh kami I probably just ruined like 9 more timelines..”
Hashirama on the other hand was beaming.
“Did you hear that Tobi! I make a village!”
Tobirama was busy staring at Naruto like he held the key to all the secrets to the universe, which, to be fair, he did hold the key to fortune telling.
“Are you a shinobi of this village?”
“Uh, yeah.”
“What clans live in this village?”
“Well, uh, the Nara, um, Akimichi, Yamanaka, uhhh, Inuzuka, Hyuuga, and uh, Aburame.”
Hashirama looked at him curiously.
“What about the Senju? Or Uchiha? Or Hatake? Or Uzumaki? You said you were an Uzumaki right?
Naruto laughed nervously.
“Uhm- Well, about that. I’m not sure what happened to the Senju but Tsunade- your granddaughter or something -is a Senju. Uhh, the Uchiha were wiped out by Uchiha Itachi by order of the Sandaime I think. Sasuke- My friend -is the last Uchiha or whatever. He had some serious problems. Next generation Madara am I right?”
Hashirama stared at him blankly.
Tobirama looked like he was trying very hard not to snicker.
“Uh, anyways, the Hatake? Those guys used to be a clan right? Well my sensei Kakashi Hatake is like the last one of them. His dad committed seppuku or something like that. The Uzumaki. Oh yeah. We were wiped out.. Them and Uzushio. Three decades ago? I think it was three and a half. At least for me. It’s probably a few decades away from you guys.”
Tobirama blanched at that.
“Holy shit I just ruined more timelines didn’t I?”
“Errgghhhh. Maybe the past isn’t so bad.”
“What about Madara?”
“Oh him? He started the fourth shinobi war. Or, technically anyways. He manipulated some kid, my sensei’s teammate I think. To capture all the tailed beasts and shove them into a giant sentient log or something. I’m not to clear on the details… Anywho, he failed at that. He wanted to put everyone in some kind of moon genjutsu or something. He did actually, for a little now that I think about it.. But we stopped him! Or.. Well.. Actually the moon is just some asylum for some crazy rabbit goddess. So broke out. And tried to kill us. Almost succeeded actually!”
Hashirama looked ready to faint.
Tobirama had whipped out a notebook and was taking notes on everything.
“It’s not that bad though! Konoha is thriving! Mostly! We beat the evil rabbit goddess and now there’s worldwide peace!”
Hashirama looked relieved.
Tobirama started to look bored.
“Although we might have to do something about Madara… Hey that Izuna guy is still alive right?”
“Still alive?” Tobirama questioned
“Yeah he dies, and Madara goes crazy.”
Hashirama was tearing at his hair.
“Madara turns good in the end though!”
Hashirama paused.
“But first he tried to destroy the village with Kurama, the Kyuubi.”
Hashirama continued.
“He turns good at the end-end though. Like after the war.”
Tobirama looked faintly guilty “I did injure Izuna pretty bad yesterday…”
“Alright!” Naruto sprung up, “New plan!”
Hashirama had tears pooling in his eyes.
Tobirama's eyes were shining with excitement.
Naruto's eyes were just shining.
“We’re going to go heal Izuna!”