Chapter Text
Siger Holmes loved the lectures he was able to attend because he was a member of the RHS. Sure it meant an occasional trip to London but with two sons with spare rooms, it was a luxury to make a trip and be spoiled with meals for a day or two.
He wished that Violet would join him from time to time but he knew his wife. As remarkable as she was, Violet didn’t have a green thumb and pretty much left anything green to him.
He had hoped that Mycroft would join him in one of these events, he did show interest back when his eldest was young but Siger did not dare raise the point given his eldest’s work schedule. Sherlock never showed any interest and so there was Siger all alone, waiting for the auditorium to fill for the lecture.
“Siger? Siger Holmes?”
Siger turned to see another elderly gentleman making his way towards the vacant seat next to Siger. The man was average height, a bit shorter than Siger. His hair was short and lighter compared to Siger’s but it seemed that the other man was older, albeit only a year or two. His boys would probably be able to give a more detailed description but Siger preferred to just ask.
“Hello, I’m sorry I’m at a disadvantage…” began Siger as he stood and took the offered hand.
“Ahh, of course, apologies,” began the other man. “Joseph Pearson, we were brief neighbors before my family moved away. My youngest son had a couple of play dates with your youngest.”
Pearson? Oh yes, the family of six, both parents being lecturers in the scientific field. Though if he could remember correctly, the father, Joseph, was more on Zoology rather than horticulture. They had become close acquaintances during the Pearsons’ brief stay in the area.
“Oh, yes. You were barely a year with us before you moved away.”
“Yes,” replied Joseph, sitting down by the man. “Wife was given yet another opportunity and so we moved away. Mind you, it calmed everyone down, given what Iggy did every time we walked past your house.”
“Ahhh, I wasn’t going to bring it up---” Because Siger did remember the Pearsons, particularly the youngest boy, Ignatius Pearson. The boy who screamed bloody murder anytime he saw a Holmes or even cuaght site of the Holmes estate.
He and Violet always thought that Sherlock must have shown the boy something or had dragged him along with Victor to some dead animal and it had been a traumatic experience.
“He’s actually the one giving the lecture today,” said Joseph with pride. “Him and his botanist colleagues. He’s told me before that he’s actually worked with both your boys in the past.”
“He’s gotten over his fears of Holmes' then?” asked Siger in jest, hoping to lighten the mood and not lose the one conversation partner he had.
“I’m pretty sure that was just a childish thing really,” replied Joseph with a laugh. “Iggy wasn’t really fond of playing with girls, you know. But your daughter was the only one with the same age so naturally, we thought they’d get along well.”
Siger paled as everything dawned on him. “Mind you, pretty sure Iggy made up most of the things he told us. I couldn’t really grasp my mind around a young girl threatening to set our house on fire or that she would kill us in our sleep. But I guess, boys would be boys, you know.”
Siger could only nod and be grateful as the lights deemed and the lecture began, not that he could concentrate on one single thing the lecturer, Ignatius Pearson--Eurus’ first victim, was saying.
Siger swallowed nervously as Joseph led him to the front of the auditorium. He regretted telling the other man he was by himself. The question had caught him off guard. Even after the hour long lecture, Siger was still reeling from his recent discovery about his daughter and--
“Iggy, you might not remember, but this is Siger Holmes,” introduced Joseph as the young man turned to his father and smiled sheepishly at Siger, before offering his hand.
“I do sir,” replied Iggy. “It’s my pleasure. Hoped you found the day enlightening.”
“You might be seeing more of each other in the future,” said Joseph with a smile. “Siger’s a member of the RHS.”
“I’m not always giving a lecture dad,” said Iggy with a roll of his eyes but Siger could note the sense of accomplishment there, and given his father’s pride, it was something that warmed the heart.
“It was a pleasure hearing your lecture today,” began Siger, though he practically had not heard a single word since the beginning. But Siger had manners, some of which he tried desperately to teach his youngest son.
“Thank you,” replied Iggy with another sheepish smile. “Mind you, pretty sure both your sons would have done better.”
“Joseph mentioned you’ve worked with both of them before?”
“Sherlock consulted for a case he was working on but when I introduced myself he hadn’t a clue who I was,” replied Iggy with a shrug and the overwhelming sense of guilt once again washed over Siger. “As for Mycroft, I attended a meeting with the Department of Transport regarding landscaping issues with regards to roads.”
He paused and looked nervous once more before raising his head to meet Siger’s eye. “Was too nervous to introduce myself but your eldest son really knows how to take charge of a meeting. Never seen anything done that efficiently in my life.”
That’s Mycroft for you , thought Siger with a smile. “My son has a minor position in the government.”
“Oh,” began Iggy. “I thought he was the main person in charge.” He turned his head to look around the auditorium. “You by yourself Mr. Holmes?”
“Sadly, my passion wasn’t passed down,” replied Siger.
“You can tell me about it,” grumbled Joseph. “All four of them took to science but not one had taken Zoology.”
“I think the animal bites and being chased around didn’t paint and nice picture dad,” replied Iggy as he fixed his belongings and slung his bag over his shoulder.
Siger wasn’t able to deflect the offer for lunch and soon found himself in at least a good conversation about botany with the young man as Joseph raised his points of view with regards to biodiversity.
It was a good lunch, if he could just ignore the growing shadow he was trying to take control off. But it seems as though the shadow had a different agenda whatsoever.
“I hope you appreciate my candor Mr. Holmes,” said Iggy when they were left alone as Joseph stepped out for a cigarette. “But I invited you to lunch for another reason.”
“Oh?” asked Siger, not really liking where the conversation was going.
“I guess it was my way of apologizing,” replied the younger man sheepishly. “When we heard that your house had been engulfed in flames and that…” He swallowed nervously before continuing. “And that she -- your daughter had died. I had been utterly relieved.”
Iggy raised his head and met the other man’s eye. “I know that sounds horrible of me, wishing someone’s daughter’s demise -- so I guess this is my petty way of trying to rid myself of that guilt.”
“You were but a child then, dear boy,” replied Siger with a small smile. “Though I dare say, from what your father told me, you had due cause to not like my daughter.”
“I’m sorry,” replied Iggy. “She just -- she always wanted to go and run around her brothers and I was just content with having someone my age to play with. But when I didn’t do as she said, she--” Iggy paused once more before shrugging. “I was utterly terrified of her.”
Siger patted the young man’s arm. “Eurus,” he could see the flinch the name had gotten from the boy and vowed not to repeat it. “She was a handful, if I do say so myself.”
“Maybe she would have grown out of it, eventually.” offered Iggy with a nod but seeing the look on the older man’s face he quickly apologized. “I’m really sorry for bringing it up. I just -- well I guess I also wanted to apologize for always shouting and crying whenever we walked past your house or whenever we saw any member of your family.”
“No harm done, I’m sure,” said Siger. On our side especially. But on you, my boy? “May I ask what exactly she did or say to you?”
“There was her creepy song,” replied Iggy, shuddering at the memory. “Then when she managed to drag me to that well, she always said she wanted to push someone in. She said she’d been thinking of doing it to me or to Sherlock’s friend -- just to see what would happen. When I told her I’d tell both our parents, she said she’d kill us all in our sleep or set the house on fire.”
Siger paled but Iggy was too focused on his hands to have noticed. “I know it was silly and she probably didn’t mean any of it. She was a Holmes and was a lot smarter for her age so, looking back on it now, it’s all quite amusing really.”
“But the experience was still quite frightening for a boy at that age,” began Siger. “You don’t have to apologize for that. I should be the one to apologize for what my daughter put you through.”
“It did make me slightly more of a cautious person,” replied Iggy with a smile. “Still, I’m sorry about your loss, Mr. Holmes.”
Siger could only nod in reply, having been saved from any more discussion as Joseph returned and the conversation shifted back to horticulture.
Siger debated with himself the entire day if he should bring it up. It’s not like they haven’t moved past it already. Sure the topic was a delicate subject matter but they have started to move forward as a family.
There was at least that small progress.
He had gone over the scenario in his head as soon as he arrived back to his temporary lodgings that afternoon. All the pros and cons of bringing up the topic and possibly ruining a night that they could have spent catching up -- but a matter like this should probably be brought to attention.
He was finally brought out of his musings when he noticed that it was dinner time and he hadn’t had anything but his own thoughts since lunch. With a sigh, and the resolve of addressing the elephant in the room, he went to the kitchen to find something to cook dinner.
The resolve he managed to convince himself with had evaporated as soon as he entered the kitchen and saw the cook wearing a small smile of achievement.
“You’re home early?”
Mycroft turned and shrugged. “Felt like cooking seeing as you are here.”
“You shouldn’t have troubled--”
“No trouble whatsoever father, I promise,” replied Mycroft, his smile brightening. “Besides, Mrs. Hudson was kind enough to lend me her recipe because and I quote, ‘That enormous kitchen of yours deserved to be cooked in.’”
The lady does have a point as Mycroft never usually spent quite a lot of time at home and was mostly found in either his main office or the office he used at the Diogenes.
“I didn’t notice your arrival,” said Siger as he sat by the counter and watched his eldest move around the kitchen. Mycroft had been thoroughly independent since he learned how to walk. It had been no surprise how quickly his eldest got the hang of living alone when he first set out for uni.
“Just freshened up a bit and went straight to cooking,” replied Mycroft as he concentrated on the stove in front of him. “You were at the study and I didn’t want to disturb you.”
“Would have been welcomed son,” replied Siger with amusement. “It is your house. Rough day at the office?”
Mycroft shrugged. “It had been a slow day. I regretted not taking you up on your offer of attending the lecture. Probably had been a better use of my time.”
Siger swallowed. The different scenarios playing through his head had Mycroft did join him. Would he still have found out everything he did today? Or would he have still been none the wiser of the horror her youngest child had inflicted on someone?
“How was the lecture?” asked Mycroft as he finished cooking and started to lay out plates and glasses for them.
“A bit too technical for me,” replied Siger with a shrug. He wasn't lying too. The topic earlier was mainly driven towards the scientific community but it was still food for thought for nature enthusiasts and many members of the RHS. “Ignatius Pearson was one of the lecturers.”
“Pearson? Oh, yes. I’ve worked with him for some landscaping project before,” replied Mycroft as he set a plate in front of his father. “Bright young man with a bit of a nervous disposition.”
You don’t know the half of it, thought Siger but any other thought was forgotten as he tried desperately to have a good dinner with his eldest son. It had been long overdue.
“I hope I’m not intruding, but is there something wrong, Father?”
Siger smiled as he took a sip of his drink and turned to look at his eldest. “What gave me away?”
Mycroft blushed slightly. “I do apologize…”
“Never apologize for that Mycroft,” reminded Siger. “I know how hard it is to turn off. But I’m glad you at least took my advice of picking the deductions you voice out to other people, as opposed to your brother.”
“Dr. Watson is slowly driving the point home,” replied Mycroft with a smile. “Something seems to be heavily weighing on your mind since dinner.”
“Far away look in my eyes, rigid posture,” listed Siger. “What else?”
“Holmes’ instinct?” teased Mycroft with a smile. “Mainly, you’re not your usual self after attending an event with the RHS. We would be discussing what you plan to do with the garden back home by now and trying to convince me to do a bit of gardening here.”
“Ahhh,” replied Siger as he drained his glass. Now or never, he supposed, as he placed his empty glass on the nearby table.
They had taken to the den after dinner, Mycroft offering a glass of scotch to his father. They had been talking about the recent case Sherlock had gotten involved with and how young Rosie was fairing but Siger was only half listening. Of course his eldest would pick up on it -- every single member of his family would have. He was an open book after all.
“The lecturer,” began Siger. “Ignatius Pearson. You don’t remember him?”
“Besides the time we attended the same meeting, no,” replied Mycroft in confusion. “Should I have?”
“The Pearsons were our neighbors when we lived at Musgrave,” explained Siger and Mycroft’s confusion grew. “They were for less than a year actually. You remember the married scientist.”
“Oh, the Physicist and Zoologist?” asked Mycroft and Siger nodded. “The family that had that boy that would scream at us whenever he laid eyes on our house or us for that matter?”
“Ignatius right on the dot,” replied Siger. “They moved after a year because the mother received yet another opportunity.”
Mycroft studied his father and Siger knew that look. It was the look that Mycroft had when he was trying to figure out something but he didn’t have all the facts just yet. “I fail to see why this is troubling you.”
“Why would a family of six who just arrived suddenly uproot once again?” asked Siger, taking him back to those old days when his son didn’t have all the answers.
“You just said the mother received yet another opportunity,” answered Mycroft.
“Moving yet again just for that one reason?” probed Siger.
“Ignatius Pearson’s fear of us might have contributed to their relocation,” replied Mycroft in understanding. “I really don’t remember much of him. I guess Sherlock and Victor must have shown him a dead pet or--”
“Ignatius was one year younger than Sherlock,” said Siger, letting it all out and true enough, Mycroft’s eyes widened. “He and Eurus had a couple of playdates.”
“She didn’t…” began Mycroft, the worry coming off him in waves and Siger wished he hadn’t brought it up.
“Threatened to push him down the well was probably the most minor of the things she told him,” began Siger as he walked over and refilled his glass. “No wonder he screamed bloody murder anytime they walked past our house. He thought he was going to have to spend an hour or so with her once more.”
Mycroft sighed as he placed his glass down on the table and covered his face with his hands. “Damn. I should have--”
“Should have what?” asked Siger, turning to face his eldest. “Mycroft, you were just a boy yourself!”
“I was supposed to be watching them, father.”
“Not 24/7,” countered Siger. “Sherlock and Victor were already a handful, and you had your advanced academic courses. We introduced your siblings to other children their age so you could focus on school work and not be pestered by them.”
“But because of my neglect--”
“Neglect?” asked Siger incredulously as he walked over and knelt down beside Mycroft, his knee protesting the action, but Mycroft deserved this comfort. “Mycroft, you were a boy. If anything, it should have been us who should have been keeping an eye out. Don’t shoulder all the blame when there was nothing that you could have done.”
“You don’t know that,” replied Mycroft, swallowing the lump in his throat. “If I had focused on her or played her game, maybe--”
“You don’t know that, either my boy,” echoed Siger with a sad smile. “I’ve been trying to ignore what has been laid out in front of me since that day in your office Mycroft but the fact of the matter is, Eurus was -- is dangerous. Maybe things would have turned out differently, or it could have been worse.”
Siger stood and went back to his chair, sipping from his glass. “Ignatius Pearson said Eurus threatened to kill them or set their house on fire if he told anyone what she wanted to do with the well. I would have brushed that aside back then. Now? I guess, we never really know…”
Siger could feel Mycroft’s eyes on his as he once again drained his glass then met the gaze of his eldest. “What I do know is, you were placed in a very difficult position, by us, by your uncle, by your siblings.” He paused to let his words sink in. “I let myself be blinded by our perfect little family that I denied every notion that there could be something wrong until it was too late.”
“Father…”
“You told us that something wasn’t right,” continued Siger. “There was a time you told me, after one afternoon when we worked at the garden in Musgrave. You told me that something seemed wrong with Eurus and her curiosity. I should have acted then and there.”
“She was your daughter,” tried Mycroft.
“And you were my son,” countered Siger with a sigh. He turned to look out the window. “Sometimes I find myself thinking what if things had been different? And you know what, for some reason, what we have now, is, as I’ve concluded this afternoon, infinitely better than everything I could have come up with.” He paused once more as he turned to Mycroft. “If we had insisted on taking in Eurus even after the fire, she might have burned the next one. If she had escaped from that facility Rudy stuck her in, she might be the worst criminal the world has ever faced. If we had known she had still been alive, we might have done something stupid and reckless that could have cost both you and Sherlock your lives…”
“Father there’s no use in dwelling on such things,” began Mycroft as he mirrored his father’s actions earlier and stood to kneel down by his side. “Like I said back then, I tried my best and I know it was very--”
Siger snorted and Mycroft stopped short. “That was your mother, Mycroft. And if she could take back those words, I’m pretty sure she would.”
“Regardless,” began Mycroft, meeting his father’s eye. “What has happened in the past, is the past. What matters now is how we move forward. Sherlock is making progress with music. Should I have included all of you years prior, maybe but as the saying goes, better late than never.”
Siger smiled as he placed a hand on Mycroft’s shoulder. “I’m sorry for the burden you had to endure all these years, my boy. But worst of all, I’m sorry you believe that you had to endure it alone.”
Mycroft’s eyes widened and before he could say anything else his father stood, dragging him along and engulfing him in a hug Mycroft had not felt since he was a boy.
It had been long overdue.