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Wei Wuxian was tall and broad-shouldered, the roundness of youth purged from his cheeks even when he smiled, although rare as that was in his time as the Yiling Patriarch, Lan Wangji could recall it like the back of his own hand. He didn’t have to peer down as much with others to look Wei Wuxian in the eyes, could capture his gaze like he was staring back into a mirror if both parties so wished. And he didn’t have to decrease the strides of his steps because Wei Wuxian’s long legs were able to contest with him, and more often than not, when they were mere teenagers, Wei Wuxian would race ahead of him, running further than time was capable enough to catch up with him and leaving Lan Wangji to observe his back, to watch how far and wide he could go before Wei Wuxian twirled back and coaxed Lan Wangji to follow him.
Because Wei Wuxian was strong, deadly powerful, but he was strongest beside Lan Wangji.
That thought haunted the very bones of Lan Wangji for thirteen years, freighting his movements at times when he was alone, reminding him, and beating it into him that Lan Wangji wasn’t there. He wasn’t there to watch, wasn’t there to hold, wasn’t there to see.
Lan Wangji didn’t see Wei Wuxian’s own flesh and blood and soul rip and tear and maim his own apart, didn’t hear him scream and cry, didn’t taste the metal and sweat in the air or feel the tendrils of Wei Wuxian’s slow breathing heart give out, didn’t smell the death of his corpse.
But-
And yet, Lan Wangji knew it all, or the horrid fantasies in his mind thought they could aide him into knowing.
They made him dream up twisted nightmares smeared with dark, dirty blood, littered with staccato sounds of snapping bones and the feeling of falling and never reaching an end, constrained in a tight limbo of nothingness as the world yanked him here and there, forced him to see what had become of Wei Wuxian, what was becoming of him, how it stripped him of him, how they fed on his meatless carcass and held him there by his very core until-
Nothing.
Lan Wangji never saw the end because he wasn’t privy to the beginnings of it, for Wei Wuxian didn’t think it important to discuss with him, and would drench the conversation with mindless laughter of, “why do you need to be so morbid, Lan Zhan? Come, let’s eat!” or “it doesn’t matter now! I’m here aren’t I?”
So perhaps he didn’t have to know. And maybe Lan Wangji would just have to accept that his husband didn’t want to tell him. That they didn’t have to live this life with blotches from the past that Wei Wuxian had long forgotten about because then Lan Wangji could respect that and listen.
Except-
Except Wei Wuxian himself didn’t seem able to.
He perceived it in the way Wei Wuxian grew increasingly frustrated with how his new body was significantly weaker than his original one, plundered of hard-earned muscle and scars of war, of the new size of his unblemished, lithe hands and shorter frame. How he got weary earlier than anyone else, incapable to go on for long walks due to his meagre stamina and former malnourishment. The fact that his golden core was as powerful as a new-born, like he didn’t have one.
As if someone had impaled him, the gentle caress of hard fingers molesting his insides, grabbing and grasping and clutching his very soul and eviscerating him completely – pilfering what made him, him and laughing in the cries of his screams and tears and pleas and pleases and begs and-
Stopstopstopstopstopstopstop
because it hurts so much and he’s suffocating on his own pain, killing himself from the sheer, blinding white lights flickering bright in his mind as foreign shapes usurped him, parasites filling him and leaving him an abused shell behind.
There were images that Lan Wangji could ponder upon but he would never know, could never feel and see what the world had really done once upon a time to the smiling, Wei Wuxian to make him think twice before succumbing to such a previous natural habit of his. But, Lan Wangji yearned to draw happiness into Wei Wuxian without ease, to steal away all fits of pessimism that homed in him and replace it with unforgiving laughter and splutters of joy, to hue his complexion with the colour of life.
He wanted Wei Wuxian to feel what he made Lan Wangji feel.
***
One of Lan Wangji’s favourite things to do was to press his lips to Wei Wuxian’s smile and let his lips dance around his, feeling the transmission of Wei Wuxian’s gasps tickle his insides and spark heat through the circuit of his veins. He loved to drag out the sessions, like grinding ink with a pestle into finery, to be witness to all the stages that Wei Wuxian would succumb to and jettison his control over. At times, Lan Wangji would furtively peek at Wei Wuxian’s expression, take in how his skin flushed with sensuality, the fan of his eyelashes like streaks of calligraphy against his otherwise pale cheeks and just wonder how in the world did he manage to get another chance?
Lan Wangji had been away for a few days, dealing with sect related business in a couple of towns over which Lan Xichen as the Sect Leader should have been the prime contender for but his brother’s elective seclusion meant that Lan Wangji was getting increasingly more involved with the clan affairs in his stead. It wasn’t a thing to mind for, as Lan Wangji would be as lenient on Lan Xichen until he was able to hold himself back up again, but he was just busier than usual, which also rendered the time he spent with his husband to be cut abruptly short.
So, that evening when he had reached the doors to the jingshi, Lan Wangji entered the place with fervent steps, quiet excitement brimming in his actions as he swept his gaze over the room and stopped when he heard cacophonic clutter behind the folding screen that scarcely got used now. It was more often than not utilised as a stand-in for when Wei Wuxian was too tired to fold his clothes into the closet and just discarded them on the sides of the screen. To say the least, it was a feat that Lan Wangji was trying to wean him off for propriety was rooted in every single thought and move of him, but they had forever to compromise.
“Wei Ying?” Lan Wangji decided to call out, hesitance orbiting the words as they tasted heavy on his tongue.
There was another collection of sounds before a dishevelled Wei Wuxian appeared, bare feet slovenly padding across the floor as his homely robe was hazardously tied around him, slipping off his shoulder as he walked and his thin legs on intermittent display when they snuck out from the slit. Lan Wangji found his eyes wondering and searching for those modicum spectacles of pale skin, heart jumping a little in his chest because of it before he outstretched his arms, Wei Wuxian naturally huddling into his blanket of clothes and warmth without a word.
“Hey, Lan Zhan. I missed you,” Wei Wuxian mused, nuzzling his head into the crook of Lan Wangji’s neck while he wrapped his arms around his waist, pulling him closer and tighter. Like now that he had him, he wasn’t planning to let him go anytime soon. “It’s too quiet without you here.”
Instantly rejuvenated from the stress of the week, Lan Wangji pressed his lips to the crown of Wei Wuxian’s hair, one large hand coming to rest on the ball of his head and the other at the small of his back. He felt Wei Wuxian’s breath against his nape, felt the reactionary shivers that racked his own spine and the immediate relaxation that unravelled any sort of tension he had picked up from business matters or his brother’s mien. Wei Wuxian was really something special.
“Mn,” hummed Lan Wangji, cradling Wei Wuxian to him, feeling the slight of his body against his own broad one. “I missed Wei Ying too.”
Wei Wuxian was smiling against his neck and Lan Wangji felt rather than saw the other’s dark eyes on him. “Did you think about me, my Hanguang-jun?”
“All the time,” Lan Wangji said staunchly.
Wei Wuxian laughed a little. “Even when you slept?”
“Especially when I slept,” Lan Wangji amended, moving away slightly so Wei Wuxian could crane his head to look up at him properly, an easy smile on his face.
If it was thirteen years ago, Wei Wuxian wouldn’t have to look up at Lan Wangji, wouldn’t have to lean on his tiptoes to kiss him or reach up to hold him. And Lan Wangji wouldn’t have to elegantly slouch down to accommodate him, to feel like he was near something fragile when he embraced him. Like Wei Wuxian would crack, break and shatter and leave him forever-
Then, Lan Wangji was gently rubbing a thumb under Wei Wuxian’s eye. “You’ve been crying.”
The slight redness bracketing Wei Wuxian’s lightly puffed up eyes, glazed over with previous tears had Lan Wangji on his own internal tangent of worry. He should have come back sooner, he shouldn’t be leaving Wei Wuxian so much, not when he was so vulnerable to his past demons, Lan Wangji had to do better. He would do better.
As if momentarily stunned, Wei Wuxian owlishly blinked at him and Lan Wangji saw something dangerously innocuous in Wei Wuxian’s expression, like he was suddenly a child who had got caught red-handed, bare the bone. The look caught Lan Wangji off-guard who only clutched harder at Wei Wuxian’s waist, not wanting to let him go even more now. But Wei Wuxian just chuckled, a plume of jarring happiness heightening the atmosphere into one of imbalance and Lan Wangji was willing for everything not to fall.
“Not really- not a lot,” Wei Wuxian claimed, shaking his head and letting rogue sprawls of long, black hair fall like mesh across his face. “It doesn’t matter, hm? You look tired, honey. Wanna go to sleep?”
But even as Wei Wuxian tried to drag Lan Wangji to their bed, the latter was an immobile wall, planted to where he originally stood as he cast his sight all over in an attempt to figure out what was wrong, what could have possibly happened.
If it was thirteen years ago, Wei Wuxian would have been more than able to dictate Lan Wangji’s movements by the simplest pull of a wrist, mounted on by sheer strength and regardless of his conviction. But now, Lan Wangji was broader, had tempered his muscles to iron and Wei Wuxian was smaller, weaker and lithe. At least by lone power, he wouldn’t be able to move Lan Wangji so Lan Wangji used that to his advantage.
“Wei Ying.”
Wei Wuxian pursed his lips. “Lan Zhan.”
“Wei Ying,” Lan Wangji repeated, firmer this time, moving his hand to cradle Wei Wuxian’s face. “What’s wrong?”
A tempest of conflicting emotions flitted through the grey of Wei Wuxian’s eyes, taking on a storm, then a hurricane and some rain. It caused the man to glance to the side, hands losing their grip on Lan Wangji’s arm as his whole body seemed to surrender.
“I don’t- it’s nothing. Really.” Wei Wuxian’s mood seemed to have soured even though he kept his appearance up and animated and it clutched at Lan Wangji’s heart with two hands. “I’m not a crier so I think it’s just this body, like it’s susceptible to it or something.”
“Mn. You.” Was all Lan Wangji said.
“What?”
Leaning impossibly closer into Wei Wuxian’s space, Lan Wangji wrapped his arms completely around him, aligning his body with his like two perfect puzzle pieces. “This body is Wei Ying.”
“Yeah, maybe that’s the problem,” mumbled Wei Wuxian into Lan Wangji’s shoulder, lips pressed into a thin line as he sighed, muddled and confused by it all. “It’s just…it’s weird.”
Nodding once, Lan Wangji ran his hands down Wei Wuxian’s arms, down the slight slope of his slender shoulders, bumping over the jut of his elbows and finally meeting to interlock with his much smaller hands. “It’s different?”
“Mhmm,” hummed Wei Wuxian, slotting his chin over Lan Wangji’s shoulder so he pressed close to him. “It’s different. And the same. It’s weird. I feel weird, like I’m not myself. Like, this body isn’t mine…I don’t know.”
Moving his head to side, Lan Wangji planted a soft kiss to Wei Wuxian’s adjacent cheek. “I know that you’re Wei Ying.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Mn. All Wei Ying.” Lan Wangji ran his lips across Wei Wuxian’s jaw, nipping plumes of pain throughout the path when he wanted to. “Everything.”
There was a breathlessness attached to Wei Wuxian’s tone when he talked now, no doubt a consequence from Lan Wangji’s touches. “Oh? Even this face?”
“Everything,” Lan Wangji reiterated stalwartly, moving to press his lips on one of Wei Wuxian’s eye. “This eye,” he said, and gave the same treatment to the other one just as tenderly. “And this eye. This nose.” He planted a caress of a kiss on the tip of Wei Wuxian’s nose as he spoke, making the receiver giggle out of blind affection. Then Lan Wangji traced his lips to Wei Wuxian’s, taking his time in pulling and tugging and licking, coaxing out soft moans from Wei Wuxian’s throat, letting his fingers fist in the roots of his long hair as they both yearned for that impossible closeness. “This mouth. Everything is Wei Ying.”
Pure honesty fell from Lan Wangji as he spoke and the sequence of actions left Wei Wuxian with a dazed smear in his eyes, as if he was seeing something that Lan Wangji couldn’t, but he was looking right at him and Lan Wangji knew how he himself looked so he just anticipated a response.
Ever since he became established with Wei Wuxian, Lan Wangji realised a palpable outpour of emotions within him, threatening its chains from being constrained since birth and slowly, and ever so lovingly, Wei Wuxian was inadvertently luring it out of him. Carefully disentangling the tendrils of control and simply letting Lan Wangji feel and feel.
And Lan Wangji wanted Wei Wuxian to also feel. They didn’t have to know everything, they just had to see and perceive either’s feelings to know enough.
“You’re so sweet, Lan Zhan,” Wei Wuxian sighed, a comfortable contentment lining his voice as he held onto Lan Wangji’s hands, lightly pulling him towards the direction of their bed. “I wonder, really…how- why are you mine?”
The implication of the movements was prickling spurs of heat through Lan Wangji as the both of them settled on the bed, crinkling the sheets and Lan Wangji ignored the urge to straighten it out as Wei Wuxian clambered into his lap, their limbs awkwardly meeting while Wei Wuxian huffed laughter into Lan Wangji’s ear, kissing his reddening lobe. “So kind and wonderful. Oh, Lan Zhan. You’re so beautiful, do you know that? These past thirteen years, how many others thought the same?”
“No one that mattered.”
“Ouch, that’s so mean!” But Wei Wuxian was smiling and laughing anyway, carding his fingers through Lan Wangji’s hair and Lan Wangji just let himself be coddled, felt his heart flutter like it was the first time all over again. “You’re so mean, honey. But I knew that already, haha. There had to be beautiful and funny and smart people that caught your eye?”
For a moment, Lan Wangji recalled brief moments of furtive affection, of quiet voices and stiff touches and jaded eyes that only probably saw his title. He didn’t care about that though, only engaged in such acts when his body called for it, when his mind was clouded with thoughts of a smile that looked like laughter and felt like the heat of a thousand suns. There was never anything loving behind those times, not because Lan Wangji didn’t know how to feel, but because he was already in love.
“No one was Wei Ying,” Lan Wangji decided to answer, taking in the splatter of surprise that tilted Wei Wuxian’s face before he broke out into a soft smile which Lan Wangji wished to take with him everywhere.
His arms were wrapped around Lan Wangji’s neck and using that as leverage, Wei Wuxian leaned back, the collar of his robe slipping off his left shoulder and baring his pale skin like a witting invitation. “The meanest man in the world, you are.”
“Mn.”
Then Wei Wuxian was sighing sounds into his mouth, mischievously tugging on the sacred forehead ribbon so Lan Wangji could bite him in retaliation, wrap his hands around his waist just that bit tighter. And Lan Wangji groaned, taken in by how, outrageously small Wei Wuxian’s waist was, how he could fit it between his outstretched hands, pull him there and here. Control him.
Lan Wangji yanked off the remaining section of cloth that was covering Wei Wuxian’s chest, hearing the hiss as the chill of the air prickled Wei Wuxian’s naked flesh but Lan Wangji quickly laid him down, kissing and licking wherever he could reach. His skin was hot under the jurisdiction of Lan Wangji’s tongue, the sheen of spit shining like a trail as he tasted him, and felt the pull of Wei Wuxian’s muscles between his teeth. It was addictive, to be able to bite and drink in his fill of Wei Wuxian like this, all splayed out and bare like a feast awaiting to be eaten.
Walking a large hand down Wei Wuxian’s torso, Lan Wangji felt the flex of muscles beneath his touch before he spread it over his flat stomach, the sash of the robe loosening from the action. “Wei Ying is beautiful.”
A rush of pink flushes shot through Wei Wuxian’s complexion as he laughed into the crook of his arm, hiding his embarrassment. “Lan Zhan… It’s okay. I’ll get over it.”
The conviction to make Wei Wuxian realise what he made him feel was only further riled up from Wei Wuxian’s seemingly innocent words, but they weren’t thoughtless. They were sounds of surrender, of not knowing what to do and how to go about it. But Lan Wangji was there, like Wei Wuxian was there for him. He would help him find a way.
So, Lan Wangji removed his hairpiece, letting it drop to the floor with a resounding thump and felt the curtain of his hair embrace all the edges of Wei Wuxian, keeping them marooned in their own world. Safe and sound.
It gave him great pleasure to lap his tongue over Wei Wuxian’s nipple, feeling it pebble between his teeth as he pulled and sucked, smiling slightly at the sharp gasp that jumped out from Wei Wuxian as he felt his hands in his hair again, keeping him there for his own gain. And Lan Wangji would stay there forever if Wei Wuxian wanted. He licked at the sure sting he would have caused, the drool of his saliva making for a wet trip as Lan Wangji relocated to Wei Wuxian’s other nipped, immediately biting it and letting it rest in between his teeth.
“Fuck, Lan Zhan,” huffed Wei Wuxian, his legs spreading as he ground up against him. “That hurts…god, it feels good.”
Bringing himself back up, Lan Wangji narrowed his eyes on the reddening beads of flesh, liking how it contrasted to the white of Wei Wuxian’s skin that was made to mark, to be a thing of ruin. Lan Wangji didn’t mind, he wanted to be the one to attack and prey upon Wei Wuxian’s body because it was Wei Wuxian.
This was Wei Wuxian.
And he was Lan Wangji’s.
“I want to…” Lan Wangji wasted no time in untying the loose sash that held the precarious opening of Wei Wuxian’s robe together, watching how it fluttered apart and presented him like a gift. He ran his hands up Wei Wuxian’s thighs, digging his nails into the fat of them as he spread them further apart, observing how his fingertips were already printing pink stains into his skin like the beginnings of a painting and how Wei Wuxian’s cock twitched and awoke, hardening by the second.
“Hm?” Wei Wuxian peered up at Lan Wangji through his eyelashes, moaning at the way he manhandled him. “Does this gege want to fuck me?”
“Wei Ying.”
Wei Wuxian laughed. “Oh, Lan Zhan, you’re the best. Look, your ears are so red! Why are you so cute?”
“Shut up,” hissed out Lan Wangji as he swallowed down Wei Wuxian’s next bout of laughter by kissing him, shoving his tongue in his mouth and tasting all that he had to offer. The corresponding heat that came from it had Lan Wangji shifting in his own robes, the swell of his own cock getting uncomfortable as Wei Wuxian continued to be his sensual self.
This man was so…
Untameable.
“You’re too big, Lan Zhan. You’ll have to open me up first,” Wei Wuxian complained with a whine even though he wanted it all the same. “The oil? Where was it…Ah, there!”
When Lan Wangji had got hold of the lubricant, he wasted no time in lathering his fingers with it and circling the rim of Wei Wuxian’s hole, breaching it with the first and feeling how the anticipating muscles clenched around him, still unsure on whether they should let him in deeper or not. He massaged around the entrance, listening to the soft whines that left Wei Wuxian’s lips so prettily before he forced his way in, the heat of Wei Wuxian’s insides making his own cock spurt out a bit of wetness into his robes. Lan Wangji seemed to underestimate how much he wanted this for himself.
“How is it, Wei Ying?” Lan Wangji asked, gulping down his own groan when Wei Wuxian smiled so lasciviously at him from below. “You seem…softer?”
And that just made Wei Wuxian giggle, his moans pitched a little higher. “Of course. I didn’t have you but I had my own fingers.”
The mental image cracked many things within Lan Wangji.
He shoved another finger in, disregarding the startled yelp it instigated. “You…Wei Ying did this?”
Wei Wuxian nodded rapidly, eyes closing momentarily as he just took in the feeling of Lan Wangji’s fingers spreading him open, the heat of them sending shivers down his spine. “Yes. While, mhm, you were thinking about me- every night. I, ah! fingered myself, pretending it was your cock and god, Lan Zhan…I missed you.”
Lan Wangji’s insides were on fire, his ears burnt red and his cock heavy in his robes and he removed his fingers from Wei Wuxian’s hole abruptly, leaving him incredulous and complaining as Lan Wangji attempted to undress himself in record time. The heat of the moment was present from the sweat beading on his forehead and the relief he felt from the air on his bare skin, as his robes were jettisoned onto the floor, uncharacteristic of Lan Wangji for sure but he had other things on his mind.
The head of Lan Wangji’s cock pressed at Wei Wuxian’s entrance, who in turn widened his eyes and nodded invitingly. “Please, please! Put it in me, Lan Zhan- ohmygod!”
The stretch of Wei Wuxian’s hole around Lan Wangji had him holding his breath, had Lan Wangji slowing down so he wouldn’t lose his renowned control and thrust all the way in, but Wei Wuxian was so damn tight and hot and wet. It sent inordinate jolts of pleasure through him, Lan Wangji’s cock getting bigger as he slowly inched his way in, forcing his way past the muscles and Wei Wuxian was teetering on whimpers and groans, his hands scrambling to find solace on the sheets as he tried to gather himself.
“Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan…You’re so big, it’s going to rip me apart- fuckfuck! Oh, honey, that’s it, nice and slowly.” Wei Wuxian was rambling nonsense, trying to focus on something that would distract him from the pain of Lan Wangji’s cock entering him so wholly.
Lan Wangji was breathing heavily against Wei Wuxian’s mouth as he kissed him, thrusting himself in deeper, tasting the drool that left Wei Wuxian’s mouth as he gasped.
“It’s okay, Wei Ying,” cooed Lan Wangji against Wei Wuxian’s lips, kissing his chin, his cheek, wherever. “This body, your body is made to take this, to take me because it’s you.”
That had Wei Wuxian diverted enough for Lan Wangji to penetrate him fully and Wei Wuxian whimpered, his hands reaching to clutch at Lan Wangji’s shoulders. “Lan Zhan.”
Pulling out slowly, Lan Wangji thrust all the way back in, feeling how Wei Wuxian’s body shuddered along with his lilting noises and how his cock swelled in pleasure, how the pleasure racked him from head to toe, laboured breaths soon taking over Lan Wangji. The sight of Wei Wuxian taking him in was making him move faster, more vigorously as Wei Wuxian’s cock beaded come at its tip, as hard as anything against his stomach.
“What is it, sweetheart?” Lan Wangji asked, only snapping hips faster as lust clouded his eyes with two hands.
Wei Wuxian’s arms were suddenly around his face, his moans littering the atmosphere and slapping sound of skin against skin clear in Lan Wangji’s ears, as he pressed Wei Wuxian’s thighs even further apart, so he could lean further down to listen. He saw the glisten of sweat dotting Wei Wuxian’s body and so he grasped onto his hips, tilting down to lick at his chest, up the planes of his thin neck.
“I don’t- I don’t, ahh- deserve this.”
“What don’t you deserve?” Lan Wangji encouraged, tasting the salt of sweat on his bottoms lip as he drank in the salacious sight of Wei Wuxian gaining pleasure from his cock. “I’m here, Wei Ying. Tell me.”
But Wei Wuxian was muffling his whines into his arm, his hair sticking to his cheeks as he squeezed his eyes shut, not letting Lan Wangji in. And yet, Lan Wangji was ruthless, fucking into Wei Wuxian even harder, even faster, even more, the treasuring heat of Wei Wuxian’s insides like a constant embrace that he couldn’t give into just yet, something that he had to ride out until both their ends.
Purging one of his hands from Wei Wuxian’s hip, Lan Wangji stroked it over Wei Wuxian’s wrist, holding it there as the man continued to cover his face. “Wei Ying, it’s okay. Mn?”
Wei Wuxian’s words were littered with the punched-out moans that Lan Wangji tore out from his throat, raw and real as he shook. “Lan Zhan…I’ve done- bad things…mhmm. I’m a bad person.”
Lan Wangji wanted Wei Wuxian’s life to be drowning in smiles, for the only time he cried to be when he laughed too much and spent his days without care for the future because Lan Wangji was there to do that for him. He wanted Wei Wuxian to drink his fill, to eat more than his personal share and to sleep until the next night over if he so wished. Lan Wangji wanted to give Wei Wuxian the things he couldn’t have in his previous life, to love and cherish and hold him like he should have done, to rewrite their broken past with fixes of the present, with sweet kisses, reassuring words and listening ears.
He wanted Wei Wuxian to know how loved he really was.
“Wei Ying, what do I deserve?”
Whines were hiccupping their way out of Wei Wuxian’s mouth, his body creasing the sheets further as he peered out from under his arm, glazed eyes snatching Lan Wangji’s in a snare and Lan Wangji was trapped.
“Everything.”
A smile crept its way onto Lan Wangji’s face, soft around the edges and shining bright in its entirety. It was as if something light had replaced the heaviness in Lan Wangji as he gently tugged Wei Wuxian’s arm from his face, revealing the stunned beauty underneath.
“Then all I need is you.”
And Lan Wangji began to thrust hard, his one free hand clutched in Wei Wuxian’s as they both raced for their shared pleasure, their bodies pressed close and near, hot and warm, like home. Lan Wangji was whispering his thoughts of praise of Wei Wuxian, spoiling him with words of worship and kissing him when he keened too loudly in response, when he held so tightly onto Lan Wangji’s hand that he thought they were stuck together forever.
That was fine for Lan Wangji as then he could spend that forever showing Wei Wuxian exactly how loved he was and how loved he should feel for himself, but he wondered if even a forever would be enough to tell Wei Wuxian all the reasons why.