Chapter Text
“Do you think she’s faking it?” Santos whispers and his boss Jericho replies under his breath.
“Nope, not faking it. Y/N’s been like that since she recovered from the accident 5 months ago.”
The mobster and the newbie bodyguard watch you in silence while you cuddle with your yellow teddy bear: from time to time you kiss its forehead and then squeeze him tightly in your arms again.
“I heard rumors,” Santos addresses the gossip. “Is it true she’s like that because of Mister Joker?”
“Kind of,” Jericho mumbles. “Someone tried to kill him in a speeding car and Y/N pushed him out of the way; she got hit instead. Full impact, you know? Broken bones and fractured skull plus an inoperable hematoma that presses on her frontal lobe. She was out of business for 6 months and when she finally recovered… Well, you can see the result; major cognitive impairment. Not herself anymore…”
“You sure are informed boss,” Santos chuckles. “Weird a man like Mister Joker chose to allow this situation for so many months: 6 months for her to recover then 5 extra ones of this behavior… He’s not tolerant person.”
Jericho lifts his shoulders up, indifferent to the henchman’s insinuations.
“How do you think sex is?” Santos winks and a crabby voice freezes the words on his lips.
“Challenging,” J growls, displeased at the speculation on his private life.
The two mobsters turn in their chair and he passes by in a hurry, taking a sit by you on the small couch situated in the middle of the warehouse.
“I’m done inspecting the cargo, looks good. My crew is putting the money together for the payment; should be done shortly.”
Alarm chimes on his cellphone and he detaches a tiny pouch out of his suit’s pocket, getting your attention too.
“Hey Pumpkin, you have to take your meds.”
“Hm?…” the confused Y/N stares at him as she bounces the teddy bear on her knees.
“Here, take this,” J offers 3 capsules with a bottle of water and you have difficulty understanding the request. Yet he’s not annoyed and helps you regardless of having an audience: The Joker plainly doesn’t give a damn.
“Perhaps if you give her a lollipop she’ll be receptive; might improve sex also,” Santos snorts, ignoring Jericho’s instant warning:
“Watch your mouth!”
The offender is not worried though: he believes that being his boss’s protégé grants him immunity regarding his own carelessness.
“It might,” The King’s sinister grin creeps up on the red lips. “Thanks for the advice, I’ll try it.”
“She loves that teddy bear, huh?” Santos implies and surprisingly enough J explains why:
“I got it for her on our first date. We were walking downtown late at night, Y/N saw it displayed in a window at a toy store and loved it. So I shattered the glass, took it and both ran away since I triggered the alarm. I had this feeling that pretending to be sweet would get me laid.”
“Did it work?” the goon pressures for a confession, laughing at The Joker’s honest answer:
“No.”
“Sir!!” Panda yells from across the huge room. “Can we get you for a sec?”
“Excuse me,” he sneers and leaves the group while Jericho preaches to the bodyguard:
“Are you completely stupid?! Don’t say stuff like this in front of him!!”
“You’re one of his main business partners and he won’t risk initiating trouble. My opinion is that Y/N and Mister Joker are playing games, totally pretending about her condition. Let me try a puny experiment and find out if I’m correct.”
“What are you doing?!” the puzzled Jericho inquires as Santos gets up from his chair and sneaks by the sofa.
“I never had the pleasure of meeting Y/N, but if the information circulating around is accurate about her she will shred me to pieces if I do this.”
He inspects the surroundings for a moment: not a soul nearby and the unexpected slap landing on your cheek makes you jump.
“Anybody home?” Santos bends over to analyze your reaction.
“Cut it out!” Jericho raises his voice, uneasy about his bodyguard’s deed.
“Mister Joker!!” Frost shouts from beyond a few creates he’s sorting out while keeping an eye on you.
Only idiots would have the impression J doesn’t have a system in place appointed to ensure your safety; obviously Santos is one of them.
“Boss!” Jonny reports to The Joker emerging from the back room. “Santos slapped Y/N!”
“I didn’t!” the latest defends his conduct, worried to notice your furious boyfriend stomping towards him.
“Let’s not be hasty,” Jericho attempts to fix this major mess-up yet The Clown Prince of Crime removes his gun from the holster, shooting Santos in the head: he knows Frost wouldn’t lie, thus he doesn’t need a justification for murder.
“Jesus, Mister Joker! You didn’t have to do that!” Jericho reprimands although he should zip it.
“You let him disrespect me on my territory?!” The Joker yanks at your hand. “Let’s go, Pumpkin!”
“I had no clue he’ll do it, ok?”
“If you can’t control your men, then give up leadership!” J drags you after him as you struggle to catch up. “The deal is off!” he screams and Jericho is unhappy about the outcome.
“What do you mean the deal is off??! We’ve been planning this for weeks!”
“Take your merchandize, disappear and I’ll enjoy my money, is that clear enough for you?!” the crazy green haired individual slams the gate, guiding you to the car in the parking lot. “Why are you such a pushover?” he angrily scolds. “I’m so tired of this crap!” J shoves Y/N in the passenger’s sit, aggravated to the point of blaming her for ruining his profitable transaction.
*************
“That was such a good deal and I blew it! It’s all your fault!” he accelerates while you seek to make sense of everything thrown your way: when memories, concepts and sounds are melted in a brain lacking the affluence of logic, forming simple sentences physically hurts.
“You made me lose my temper!” The Joker lashes out since he’s aware his decision to cancel the arrangement with Jericho wasn’t the best. “You can’t defend yourself and you barely articulate elementary words! I miss having conversations with you, Y/N! Can your mind comprehend this?! You used to be funny, sassy and witty! You’re accountable for what happened, you dumb woman! I wouldn’t have done the same for you, I hope you know that!!!!”
You close your eyes, concentrating very hard on his remarks: something about wit, sass and… and…
It’s too much so you cover your ears, which prompts him to completely have a meltdown.
“Get out of the car!” he hits the breaks, leaning over to open the door on your side. “Get out I said!” he screams and forces you out against your will: you start crying, incapable of discerning what he wants and it makes you increasingly anxious. “Go be useless on your own!” he closes the door and takes off, abandoning Y/N without money or any other means in the industrial area outside Gotham City.
J continues to drive for another 15 minutes before halting at Southampton railway crossroads: the barriers are blocking the path and the red light keeps blinking, a sign the train is approaching. Not a lot to do besides waiting so he deeply exhales, still fuming at today’s events.
The Joker huffs at the sight of your teddy bear resting in between the seats; you probably dropped it when he nicely asked you to flee the vehicle.
Why are you attached to this boring stuffed animal to begin with? I mean, each time it requires washing you won’t budge from the laundry room until it’s returned to you. After the accident you carry it everywhere so maybe you wonder where it’s at…
J taps the steering wheel, pissed this idea randomly popped to bother him.
Nothing to be concerned about, he ditched you in the industrial area… that’s been closed for the last four years… the factories are empty, no people there… except creeps… searching for easy prey… like you…
“Fuck!” he abruptly backs out and the skid marks on the gravel certainly indicate he’s in no rush at all.
In less than 15 minutes he sees you limping on the right side of the road and slowly pulls over, waiting for you to get to the car. However, there’s a small fact The Joker didn’t anticipate: Y/N disregards the car plus its driver and keeps walking.
“Great…” he sighs. Stepping on his pride isn’t common practice for him, yet he grabs the yellow toy, sprints out of the SUV and follows the upset Queen. “Hey Pumpkin! Hey!!”
You immediately turn around and stutter, frustrated:
“Y-you left me!!”
J is stunned to hear what he considers a whole tirade coming out of you; he’s positive it took a lot of effort.
“Umm…you forgot your teddy,” he extends his arms and you snatch it, hugging the plush bear to your chest. “I don’t understand what’s so important about a cheap…”
“Hm?” you frown, interrupting.
“The toy I got for you,” J repeats. “Why do you like it?” he simplifies the phrase so you can better process its meaning.
“Reminds…”, you strain really hard to organize your thoughts, “Reminds me… when you liked me… when I was… when I was smart…” and you wipe your tears, upset. “Now… now I’m stupid…”
The Joker doesn’t know what to say and him not having a reply it’s a rare occurrence.
“You’re not stupid,” he mutters and because you won’t quit sobbing the question arises: “Hey Y/N, who’s my girl?”
What is he talking about…? A girl?…What girl?…
You spin to check your surrounding and J lectures, exasperated.
“For God’s sake, Princess. I’m talking about you: you’re my girl!”
“Hm?”
“Let’s put the neurons in your beautiful brain to rest, shall we? I think they’re oversaturated,” The Clown Prince of Crime decides, pleased to see he distracted you and you’re not crying anymore. “Are you hungry?”
You appear lost and he hints:
“You want food? We can get pizza, wings, possibly ice-cream from our favorite place. OK?”
“Pizza?” your face lights up and so does his without him realizing.
“A-ha. You love your peperoni, true?”
Oh boy, thank heavens the trick worked and you’re in the car again without any additional energy from his part; you didn’t caught on to it and it’s perfect. I guess your situation has a few perks.
“Hey Y/N, you know what else I miss?” The Joker cruises up the street, sulking. “Our fights! I swear I do! I lived for that shit! When you told me you hated me and I wanted to end you,” he snickers at the recollection. “If you hated me so much why did you save me?”
“No hate…” you smile and he’s truly amazed you kept up with his rambling. “Love…” you playfully touch his shoulder with the teddy bear’s paw.
The King of Gotham is speechless again; he avoids glaring in your direction and he’s relieved you don’t have enough transparency to notice how flustered he is.
“Pumpkin…” J grumbles in a low tone. “Do you believe that after that blood clot in your brain is reabsorbed, you’ll be more like your old self? The doctors said it won’t make a difference, but what the hell do they know?! Please say yes, even if it’s a lie. Hey Pumpkin,” he reiterates since you emotionlessly gaze at the landscape outside. “Say yes.”
“Hm?”
“SAY: YES,” The Joker persists.
“Yes?”
“Good girl,” he smirks and hastens towards the city. “You want ice-cream first?” the inquiry continues, yet J is used to monologues regardless. “Are you gonna let me have a bite? Can you predict what else I would like a bite of?” he leans over and whispers in your ear.
“Hm?…” the disoriented Y/N crinkles her nose.
“Dammit!” The Clown Prince of Crime exclaims. “You’re supposed to mention it’s indecent and then agree to it, Y/N!”
What does he want now?… something about a bite?
You reach over and take his hand, sinking your teeth in the laughing mouth tattoo.
J snorts and then starts cracking up with all his heart, the awkward noises making you giggle.
”What am I going to do with you, Princess?” he shakes his head, amused nevertheless at your interpretation.
The Queen doesn’t answer, very captivated by The Joker’s silver grin; one could estimate it makes her happy although she can’t pinpoint the reason why. Y/N snuggles with the teddy bear that the madman stole for her on their first date hoping he’ll get laid, already delighted about their upcoming lunch.
The woman may not be the same person she was before the accident, but at least one detail is unchanged: she’s still The Joker’s Pumpkin.