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Waver tried to calm his breathing. It didn't work.
They had been back home and away from Caster's workshop for an hour. Half an hour ago, Rider had shooed their housemates away to go play bingo or something like that, Waver wasn't sure and didn't care. There was every reason for him to be able to stop panicking. Every completely logical reason that what he'd seen shouldn't be able to affect him like this. He was a magus, and magecraft was known to be able to affect the body. Some magi were unscrupulous enough to misuse that. That was all.
All these logical reasons didn't help.
Rider was normally in material form, but rarely paid much attention to his Master. His gaze had barely left Waver since they got back, aside from when he had to get their hosts out of the house. He hadn't said much, and Waver knew why - comforting people wasn't his purview.
If Waver was going to stop seeing those mangled bodies, shaped according to Caster's whims... he was going to have to do something about it himself. The trouble was finding something that would work and not just make things worse.
He had to try something. Waver's voice trembled as much as his body when he called, "Rider, come here."
Rider was already fairly close to Waver on the bed, but he slid over more until they were almost touching. "Yeah?"
"Let me do this." Waver leaned up enough to press his lips to Rider's.
The surprise on Rider's face would have been comical in any other situation. He didn't push Waver away, but he drew back a bit. "Hey-"
"I won't use a Command Seal to make you sleep with me, but I need to focus on something else. Anything else, anything but that place where-" Tears pricked at the corner of Waver's eyes, and he wiped them off with his sleeve. "I just need to try this."
There was a moment's pause before, as gently as he could, Rider pulled Waver back closer to him. In the softest tone Waver had ever heard him use, he began to speak.
It wasn't that Waver wasn't listening to the words; he was, at least at first. They were about comfort and safety, and carefully avoided mentioning Caster at all. Rider didn't look away once, though it must have hurt his neck to look down so much, and Waver found that he too had to keep eye contact. Gradually, the words themselves faded away, and his worldview narrowed to the deep sounds of Rider's voice, the rise and fall of it.
His body stopped shaking, but Waver wouldn't speak and break what felt like a trance. It was only when Rider finished speaking that Waver came back to what seemed like awareness. A much more peaceful awareness. "...Thank you, Rider."
"Don't mention it." Rider ruffled his hair a little. "I don't mind doing those things with you, but there are simpler ways to calm down if that's all you wanted."