Work Text:
THIS BOY
That boy
Took my love away
Though he'll regret it someday
But this boy wants you back again
His heart broke anew every time.
Every time John smiled that cute, toothy smile for Roger, and every time the blond drummer answered with a brilliant smile on his own. Every time the two younger boys would sit together, heads almost touching, whispering between themselves like the rest of the world didn't exist. Like Freddie didn't exist.
And Freddie got it, he really did. Roger was a bubble of brilliant energy, beautiful and sunny and everything Freddie wasn't. That was the point, wasn't it? He was not Roger, by miles.
But John Deacon had arrived, on a cloudy morning, and stole Freddie's heart. A shy, young boy with a surprising core of steel. A smart man that could hold his own, and never fly off the handle. With his cute smile and badass bass riffs and perfect body. Freddie fell quickly, and fell hard.
Only to see John fall in love with his striking, hot as hell bandmate. With Freddie's best friend. That was terrible, in a way, because Freddie couldn't even hate Roger for stealing his love away.
Seeing the rhythmic section set up the stage, laughing merrily, should made him happy. But seeing John's eyes sparkle every time they fell on Roger made his heart break.
Breaking anew every time.
That boy
Isn't good for you
Though he may want you, too
This boy wants you back again
He wanted to scream.
When Roger would comply with his whims only to make him happy. When the blond would sit a bit straighter, would talk less louder, would watch regrettably at his pack of cigarette restraining from lightening another, just because Brian didn't approve. Only to have a chance, even when Roger was way out of his league anyway.
And Brian liked Roger, who wouldn't? Roger was beautiful, brilliant, passionate. Roger was everything John ever wanted.
But Roger wanted Brian instead.
Brian, with his long fingers, and long legs. With his sorrowful expression, and his thoughtfulness. John thought he was too lost in his own head, you know? Not really rooted in this earth. John wasn't like Brian, and couldn't even try to be.
Roger, instead, was John sunshine. His easy smile, and bright blue eyes, and his big heart. Roger, that had always a joke to make him smile.
Brian was going to ruin him, was going to dim that energy into nothing. Why Roger couldn't see that Brian wasn't the one for him? Why he couldn't see John, waiting in the corner for his one chance to love, and be loved?
He wanted to scream, on Roger's behalf and on his own.
Oh, and this boy would be happy
Just to love you, but oh my
That boy won't be happy
'Til he's seen you cry
Maybe he had to try harder?
Seriously though, he didn't think that whatever would do the difference. He fell in love with Brian a long time ago, but he never had a chance, didn't he? Brian didn't need someone like him.
Too loud, too easy-going, too... stupid? Roger didn't like to sell himself short, but Brian was pretty smart.
Never mind the fact that Brian friend-zoned him from the very start. In fact, Brian didn't have eyes for anyone but Freddie. And Roger could understand, because Freddie was his best friend. Freddie was brilliant, and outrageous, and magnetic. What could Roger do? Near Freddie, he disappeared.
Brian, with his beautiful curls, and his chiselled jaw, and delicate hands. Smart, sensitive, caring, always lost in some galaxies inside his head. Brian who built his own guitar, who wrote the most beautiful songs Roger had ever heard. Of course Brian, with all his qualities, would look to someone who was at his level.
Only that Freddie wasn't the one. Freddie was a free spirit, and a performer at heart. Freddie would live his life like an artist, and the world would be his personal stage. Brian needed security, and slow days, and cuddling mornings and peace of mind. Freddie couldn't give him that.
Neither Roger could, honestly. But he could try.
He ought to try harder then, to make Brian see him worthy.
This boy
Wouldn't mind the pain
Would always feel the same
If this boy gets you back again
He shed a lot of tears.
But he was going to shed a lot more, because of him. Because he didn't look his way. And that was okay.
Freddie was the most perfect human being that walked this earth, and it was clear from the start that Brain didn't have a chance. What irked him the most was that, apparently, John had.
Don't take him wrong, John had a lot of qualities; a strong-willed, no-bullshit boy with a surprising soft heart and a shy demeanour. He was okay, in Brian opinion, but never like Freddie.
Freddie was music, was art incarnated. Freddie was his personal Polar star, and Brian would forever be chained in his orbit. Freddie was capable of the most heart-warming gestures, and the most unsettling. Freddie was a whirlwind of emotion, and sensations. Freddie was the one who held
Brian's heart.
He was going to suffer, but Brian accepted it, even welcomed it. If he couldn't stop loving Freddie, he was going to embrace his love, the good and the bad of it.
He was going to shed a lot of tears, for love.
This boy, this boy, this boy, (this boy).