Archive of Our Own

when Josh starts awake, it's cold.

that's the first thing he notices, goosebumps running up his legs and down his bare arms, and no warm human fitted against his back where Tom should be. his chest feels like it's been shaken by a hiccup, or like someone reached inside and snipped their fingers right into his heart and lungs. that feeling of not-quite-pain that slinks into his bones after an awful dream, wells tears up into his eyes, and Josh turns his face out of where he had it smushed into the pillow. the room is bright, so bright all the colours seem washed out, all light and no heat.

Josh blinks with his sleep-heavy eyes, and before he can really process what he's doing, the tears spill over and he chokes out a dry, high-pitched sob. it catches in his throat, makes him gag that bit more around it, but that's not enough to make it stop. he wills for that, digs his face into his pillow and his teeth into the freezing flesh of his arm to muffle the embarrassing sounds that keep on slipping out. he's never been a quiet crier, always been the type who blubbers and sniffles like a little girl, and it's somehow worse now. like he's been cracked open so his shaken-up squishy parts are all there and vulnerable with no one to protect him, that's how Josh feels, and it constricts his chest tightly when he bites down harder onto his arm, so he stops and just lets it out. he rubs his snotty nose into the pillowcase and hiccups out pathetic little sounds, and he feels disgusting and exposed and he knows he can't stop.

there's tears and snot wetting his face, spit running down his chin, so now his face doesn't feel cold any more but red-hot and sticky. a little string of saliva leaks from the side of his mouth when he pops his thumb in to suck on it, too, and the noise he makes when he feels it slither down his hand is a louder, grosser one, but he doesn't care. at least it's calming, a little, the steady suction and the salty skin and heavy press of his own thumb on his tongue, and the tiny pricks of pain from his teeth, but he still can't stop making obnoxious sobbing noises in his throat, and now he doesn't care about that, either. his insides feel even more shaky with it, though, wracked by the heaving in his chest and the shudders running along his limbs, and there's actual pain in his ribcage now, the dull pain that comes from crying.

Josh bites down hard, hard enough to feel it sting in the knob of the joint there, and yowls through all the tension around his lungs.

that's what it takes to wake Tom. he's a little drowsy, for a split second, but that fades when there's another awful loud sniffing sound and he gets it together enough to realise that Josh is crying. he's a shaking little lump on the far side of the bed, his breath loud and heavy with snot, and Tom's first instinct is to reach and gentle his fingers over Josh's ribs through his thin t-shirt.

“Josh?” and he instantly regrets doing it, because this feels like he's seeing something he was never supposed to see. “hey?”

the lump coils tighter in response, muscles tensing under Tom's touch, makes some more mangled crying noises and trashes about aimlessly when Tom starts to pull his hand away, so he keeps it right there.

Tom swallows down a huge gulp of nothing. it's not the first time Josh's woken up having a bad day, far from it, but he's never really sure how to go about it, whether Josh wants cuddles and comfort or if he'll be abrasive and insist everything's fine.

“come here,” the lump chokes out, then, or at least something that sounds like “come here”.

which probably means Josh wants cuddles, but Tom's still hesitant about scooting over and fitting one arm around Josh's torso. he gets just close enough to align himself with Josh's back, close enough that when another sob wracks Josh's body, it gets them pressed together for a split second.

“closer?”

and, Tom obliges. he closes the inches of space between them, and he's not going to try and touch Josh in any way that could make him uncomfortable when he doesn't know why Josh is being like this just yet, so he settles for closing his fingers around Josh's forearm where it's flexed tight with his hand in the sheets. he can hear Josh's breath slow and steady then, hear the soft suckle that makes it obvious that yeah, Josh's got his thumb in his mouth, and he can't resist the soft spot right behind his ear.

“shh,” Tom hisses out, right when his free hand pushes the limp tangles of hair from Josh's nape so he can press a kiss there, and to his relief, that gets Josh to still further. “sh, bear. I'm here with you.”

he nuzzles his nose into the junction between Josh's neck and shoulder, gently, gently, and feels Josh relax further underneath it, muscles going slack.

“come even closer?” Josh asks, once again, his voice distorted by tears and the thumb that's still caught between his teeth.

“'m as close as I can get,” Tom replies, but he moves his hand down to stroke the soft little swell of Josh's stomach. “close like this?”

Josh sniffles and nods into the pillow, and Tom completely wraps both his arms around where his waist is that little bit pinched-in. which means that his left arm is most likely going to fall asleep under Josh's weight in a few minutes, but Josh is somehow so much warmer against Tom's bare torso, soft and only shaking a bit, and Tom decides that's definitely worth it.

“hey again.”

“hey.” Josh makes a loud smacking noise around the thumb in his mouth. he sniffles some more, quiet and soft like he does when he's cried himself out, and then makes a louder, grosser snorting noise. from where he's got his chin fitted against Josh's shoulder, Tom can see tiny bitemarks from Josh's little fangs around the base of his thumb when it slips from his lips, and that stings.

Tom rubs his hand over Josh's belly some more, to soothe him completely, maybe, whispers, “hey, bear,” into his sweaty skin.

Josh snuffles one final time and wipes his snotty face on the pillowcase, and then he says, still nasal, “sorry for being so gross.”

“bear, no.” Tom plants a big kiss on Josh's wet cheek, as if to prove a point, and says, “you're not gross.” because, really, even if he should be, he isn't.

“I feel gross.”

“it's okay. you gonna let me see your face properly?”

Tom loosens his grip just enough for Josh to clumsily roll onto his back, and then he reaches for a tissue from the box on Josh's bedside. he's careful when he cleans the tears off Josh's cheeks and the remaining snot from around his nose, but when he's done with that, Josh is chewing on his plump bottom lip again like he's about to cry once more.

“this better?”

and Josh nods and blinks the tears away, but the look on his face stays the same, all soft and vulnerable and small. it's the look that tugs on Tom's insides and makes him want to just wrap Josh up and keep him safe forever, which is pretty much what he's already trying to do, but it makes the need that much worse

“d'you want to tell me what's wrong?”

Josh shrugs and makes a noise of uncertainty. “I had a bad dream.” he brings one hand up to rub over his eyes and says, “I don't want to talk about it. okay?”

“okay, bear.” Tom watches when Josh's face lights up a bit at the nickname and moves in as close as he can get without worrying Josh might shove him away for it. he's learned not to push too much, so he just asks, “any way you can think of that I could make you feel better?”

again, Josh makes a noise that Tom can't quite place, but this time, he also nods. he turns his head to press a sloppy kiss over Tom's lips, too quick for Tom to really respond, and then he's wiggling about and rolling over to properly face Tom. his hand comes to rest on Tom's side, calloused and big in a harsh contrast to how much he reminds Tom of a child at that second, and. “Daddy?”

there's still that uncomfortable shudder that runs through Tom at the word, even now, but he smiles back at Josh anyway. this is going to be one of those days for Josh, then, and really, he should have seen it coming. “yeah.” Tom strokes all the way along Josh's back, from the space between his shoulderblades to his tailbone, listens to how Josh's breath goes a little bit louder with satisfaction and watches his eyelids flutter shut, and he asks, “so you want daddy to take care of you?” and can't hide the little laugh that goes along with the question.

as much as he doesn't mind this, being Josh's daddy, there's always that little bit of awkwardness leading into the scene, but then, he knows it's only a matter of time until they'll both be fully immersed into their roles.

Josh's laughing along, though, the soft low laugh he only gets when he's sleepy, normally. his legs tangle with Tom's under the sheets and he says, “don't be corny, Daddy.”

“sorry.” like this, their faces are close enough that Tom can smell the sour morning breath from Josh's mouth, but honestly, it doesn't bother him a fraction of how much it probably should.

“what do you want to do to cheer up?”

in fact, he leans forward that bit to properly kiss Josh and makes a point of ignoring the taste, and instead focusses on making Josh hum into his mouth with his tongue lapping soft at Josh's puffy bottom lip. he's actually sure he must taste about the same as Josh does, so there's really no room for him to complain about it, and also, it's making Josh squirm a little bit where they're pressed torso-to-torso, one strong thigh pushing up into Tom's groin.

“eww,” Josh goes and pulls a face as soon as they pull apart. “you taste awful.” he cackles for a short moment and tucks his head underneath Tom's chest and admits, “I don't know.” there's a soft sound that lets Tom know Josh's popped his thumb back into his mouth, and so his voice comes out muffled when he asks, “just take care of me, okay?”

he hums around his thumb and nuzzles deeper into Tom's collarbone, and Tom can't help but to move his arms on Josh's back, one to go across his shoulders and one to just above his bum, almost as if he was cradling an actual child against his chest, and when Josh makes a noise of approval, it's so easy despite his size for Tom to think of him as the little boy he needs to be right now.

“all right.” Tom kisses Josh's forehead through the strands of hair plastered to it still with sweat, listens to him make his pleased little boy noises, and asks, “how about I bring you breakfast in bed?”

in response to that, Josh makes a noise that sounds like approval, but it's coupled with both his thighs clamping down around Tom's leg, and he cuddles that bit closer.

“you know I can't make breakfast if you don't let me leave, right?” Tom starts to ease his arms away from where they're tight around Josh's middle, and Josh just grins his mischievous little grin around his thumb and clasps his legs around Tom extra firmly for a short second.

“you're right.” Josh reaches over to snatch Tom's pillow from his side of the bed when Tom's managed to disentangle himself, only to immediately cling to it the way he did to Tom himself. “I'm sorry, Daddy.”

“it's all right.” Tom smiles down at him and combs through his fringe with his fingers, only briefly, and he must have made an odd facial expression at Josh burying his face in the pillow.

because Josh immediately goes, “it smells like you, okay?” and then pulls a mock pouting face and adds, “since you're leaving me on my own to go make me breakfast.” like this, he looks so exaggeratedly miserable that Tom can't help but laugh at him, just for a short second.

“I won't be long, all right, baby bear?”

“all right,” Josh replies, with a voice like a bratty kid's, and flops onto his back with the pillow still clutched to his chest, also like a bratty kid, and he keeps on pouting his best pout.

and Tom knows he's looking for more affection, more kisses, but he's beginning to crave his morning cup of tea himself, and also, he knows Josh wants that breakfast he's been promised just as much. he's already at their bedroom door and pulling on his dressing gown when he pauses for a second to look over at Josh curled all protectively around the pillow, thumb in his mouth once again already.

“love you, baby bear.”

“love you too, Daddy.” Josh smiles around his thumb, all twinkly eyes and tiny fangs. “don't be too long.”

“yeah. won't be.” Tom smiles back at him and finishes tying the belt to his gown into a sloppy bow.

he's gentle when he pulls the door half-shut, and when he steps out into the hallway, his heart's swollen all the way up into his throat. really, Tom's not a sap, or at least he's never considered himself to be one, more the type for casual sex than the type who tells people he loves them.

but the thing is, he's in love with this ridiculous boy who some days just needs to call him “daddy” and act like a little kid, so in love it makes him ache a little with it when he's setting up the electric kettle and picking the box of Josh's favourite tea out of the cupboards. while he waits for the water to boil, he butters some sandwiches, a thin spread of butter and a lot of honey, and banana slices, Josh's favourite feel-good snack.

honey for bears, Tom realises and smiles a little to himself, and then he thinks about how much Josh preens when Tom calls him “baby bear,” and smiles so much it hurts in his cheeks and in his throat, just a little. the kettle puffs out a huge wad of steam and Tom pours out two cups of tea, milk and two cubes of sugar in Josh's, and he sets both the mugs and the plate of sandwiches down onto a tray.

when he gets back to their bedroom, Josh is still curled around his pillow, thumb only slipped loosely into his mouth now, but he perks up as soon as Tom tries to snake through the only half-open door while still keeping his balance on the tray. he giggles, low and soft and pleasant for his standards, and Tom is enamoured with this boy. not enamoured enough to drop the tray or spill the tea, though, no.

“what's that you have there, Daddy?” Josh asks, and his voice has gone all soft and little and purr-ry, almost sensual, really.

“made you some tea.” Tom sets the tray down in the middle of the mattress, motions for Josh to budge a bit, “steady now.” he climbs onto the bed himself, careful to not so much as nudge the tray when he arranges himself on his side of the mattress.

Josh's hand is still a bit shaky when he grabs for one of the honey sandwiches, but his face looks pleased enough when he then proceeds to wedge one corner of it into his mouth.

“sammich,” he mumbles, sounding still somewhat drowsy, around his mouthful of soft white bread, and his other hand somehow slinks between the pillows until he can lay it on top of Tom's. “thank you, Daddy.”

“not a problem.” Josh's eyes are all dark and intense and devoted, and now it's Tom who's preening internally at that. he closes his fingers around Josh's and holds them tight even as he bends forward to reach his mug of tea. steam billows up and into his face and he blows it away, and after he takes a careful just barely-not-too-hot-to-drink sip, he says, “just want my little bear to feel safe, you know?”

“I know,” Josh says and makes a grab for a second sandwich. like this, one messy strand of hair comes loose where he'd tucked it behind his ear and falls down across his face, and he adds, “that's what daddies are for.”

“yeah.” Tom sips his tea once again before he puts it back onto the tray, and he reaches out and pushes that hair away from Josh's face. “still.” he tries to settle back against the headboard, but he can't find a comfortable position, the wood too hard against his shoulders, and it's only now that he notices there's something missing. “why d'you still have my pillow?”

Josh rubs his nose into the material, as if to prove a point when he says, “because it smells like you.” his fingers twist tighter into Tom's and he says, sounding almost pouty, “only because you weren't there. like I said.”

Tom has to smile a bit at that. “come over here, bear?”

“uh huh.” the sound is muffled by the toast in Josh's mouth, but he's nodding almost frantically, and in the next moment, sitting up and scooting over so he can sit right by Tom's side.

“wait a second,” Tom says and reaches out for the tray where it's still sitting in the middle of the bed, only a few inches away from where Josh has put his feet. he places it over on the bedside, where he can still get to it easily, and watches Josh spread out that bit more, his chest pressing against Tom's side a bit tighter. “better?”

“better.” Josh grabs for the two pillowcases still lying on his side of the bed and fits one behind himself, the other behind Tom's back, before he tucks his own head underneath Tom's chin.

“better,” Tom says once again when he relaxes back into the pillow, and when Josh hums a low sound of pleasure, he can't help but hum along.

like this, Josh is close enough that Tom can feel all of him, feel the gentle vibration pass through the soft of his torso when he keeps making that satisfied little noise, and feel him breathing when he says, “this's much better than nightmares.”

Josh turns so he's even more sideways, so his one leg comes to lie on Tom's lap and his arm can stretch across Tom's chest to grab yet another slice of sandwich. Tom watches him, watches how soft his face has gotten in comparison to the thunder expression he'd had not too much earlier, soft enough to make him really, really look like a little boy, a tall little boy whose leg hair is tickling at Tom's thigh and who's got a deep grumbly voice when he asks, just barely comprehensible, “canIhafsomteeea?”

Tom feels a bit drowsy with it all, happy-drowsy like being high and sleepy-drowsy, and drowsy just from watching Josh settle into that childlike mindset he drops down into ever so often, but he makes a reach for both their mugs and hands Josh his bear one.

“there you go.” Tom takes a long sip which is still slightly too hot to be how he likes it, but it serves to make him feel more awake at least, and he laughs when Josh loudly slurps from his mug and, apparently, drinks about half of it down in one go. “tea that good?”

Josh “uh huh”s once again and lowers his mug, there's a little bit of tea and milk wetting the dip in his upper lip which he promptly wipes away with a handful of duvet. “needed this.”

that one rebellious strand of hair falls down again when Josh settles with his head on Tom's shoulder, right across his nose to split his face in two, and Tom wants to tuck it away back where it belongs. he wants to run his fingers through Josh's hair and brush all the tangles out from it and just generally take care of him, really.

Josh takes another big slurp of tea and sets the now empty cup down onto the mattress, and he says, nose nudging at Tom's collarbone, “I feel all full now.”

and Tom laughs at him some more, not in a malicious sense, but he can't not laugh when Josh's being needy and childish and, frankly, really adorable. he reaches over and picks that piece of hair from Josh's face, pets over his head for a good measure when he tucks it back behind his ear. that gets Josh purring, tiny growling noises in the back of his throat like a little kitten, and Tom's heart flutters so much in his chest he hopes Josh can't feel it. he's that enamoured with this weird little bear-kitten boy, with the way he goes closer to mewling than purring when Tom keeps on scratching at his scalp, and even though Josh's hair is gross with sleep and grease.

“not too full, just right,” Josh continues on after a second. he cuddles deeper into Tom's side, about as close as he can get so Tom can feel all the soft parts of him.

there's this terrible puppy-dog look on his face– bear-puppy, Tom thinks to himself – and Tom can't resist that, he contorts so he can kiss Josh's forehead and properly wind one arm around his waist. he wants more of this, wants to hold Josh about as long and as tightly as possible, insides soft with how stupidly in love he's feeling and with how much he wants, needs, really, to take care of Josh. Tom's got way too many feelings.

“d'you want the last of my sammich, Daddy?” Josh asks.

and Tom nods and reaches for the one triangular slice of bread left on the plate. he's never actually liked honey, the particular combination of sweet and sticky, especially not on toast, but he chooses to ignore that because he is pretty hungry, actually. also, because it's kind of impossible to say no to Josh when he's nuzzling his cheek against Tom's chest and cooing daddy like it's the most natural thing in the world for him. which, honestly, it does kind of feel completely natural.

when he's swallowed his first bite, Tom strokes that piece of hair that just won't stay put from Josh's face once more and asks, “so what do you want to do today, Josh bear?”

they've got a couple days at home before they're leaving for the next leg of tour, and Tom's original plan had been to take Josh out somewhere, maybe get dinner or spend a few hours trawling through record shops. basically, spend the whole day all for themselves, which is still what they're going to do now, but most likely not in the same way.

“I don't know,” Josh says. “watch a movie maybe.” he rucks up on the bed until he can smush his lips against the side of Tom's face easily and adds, “can we have a bath first? I feel gross.”

and Tom nods. like this, with Josh heavy against his side, he can feel Josh's morning breath right on his face, his plump mouth wet when he keeps on layering sloppy kisses onto Tom's face. obviously, Tom knows that he can't complain about the reek of chewed up landfill from Josh's mouth because his breath has got to smell just as unappealing. but the thing is, Josh being this close and needy and sucking gently on his jawline, that's beginning to turn him on and he's not sure if that's okay or not, if Josh is in that part of little space that makes him needy and hypersexual and subby or if he just wants to watch old cartoons in his favourite pyjamas all day.

“Daddy?” Josh asks again after a few seconds, the A drawn all out. “I said if we can take a bath.” he moves about as close as he can get, so close his nose is pushing against Tom's cheekbone all obnoxiously, and kisses him so slobbery that he might as well be licking Tom's face, which is what fully snaps Tom back out of his turn on-related moral dilemma and makes him chuckle, just for a short second.

“yeah,” he says, finally. “yeah, we can have a bath, you bratty bear.”

Josh giggles and presses yet another gross kiss over where Tom's cheek is already wet with saliva and makes a self-satisfied noise, and Tom really, really wants to kiss him properly already.

he turns his head to connect their mouths once again, fully intends for it to be soft and gentle, just a little peck to reinforce just how much he cares about Josh right now. what he doesn't expect is for Josh to take that kiss and turn it deep and violent, tongue forcing in desperately and moaning into it, all while he pulls his one hand back just so it strategically brushes where he knows Tom's soft cock is under the covers.

and that, that changes everything.

Tom gasps into Josh's mouth when he feels it, out of surprise rather than arousal, and hopes Josh didn't notice that, but judged by the mischievous smirk that plays at the edges of his lips when he pulls away, Josh definitely did notice.

“can we put bubbles in there too, Daddy?” he asks then, in his best innocent tone of voice, as he starts to gather himself back up to sit.

“yeah.” Tom swings his legs over the side of the bed and leans around to peck Josh on the lips, so brief that he doesn't have the time to react and turn it dirty once again. “yeah, we can have bubbles.”

he watches in amusement when Josh almost rolls off the bed, taking the duvet halfway with him, and when he proceeds to link both arms around Tom's waist and kiss him once again, open-mouthed and gross.

“excellent.”

in the bathroom, Josh sits hunched over on the toilet seat and makes a grab for his toothbrush while Tom starts to run them a bath. he tests the water with his wrist to make sure it's just right and then reaches for the small box on top of the cabinet where Josh keeps his – frankly ridiculous – collection of bubble baths.

“what kind of bubbles do you want?” Tom asks. he can tell Josh is watching him, eyes focussed on the outline of his body through his dressing gown like some kind of hungry wild animal. which Josh basically is, honestly. he runs one hand across the lids of the assortment of bottles and starts to list, “we've got vanilla, strawberry milkshake, hot chocolate...”

really, he knows that neither of them care that much, because Josh just likes the foam and the smell, and Tom in turn likes Josh after the bath when he's pink and clean and soft with the scent of sweets stuck to his skin.

when he turns his head so he can look at Josh properly, he's still watching, and also thoughtfully sucking on his toothbrush. “can we have the pink frosted cake kind?”

“yeah.” Tom smiles, not so much back at him and more to himself because of how in love he's with this weird boy and his obsession with candy-scented bath suds. “we can have that kind.”

he squirts a few big splashes of bright pink liquid into where the tub is slowly filling. the in-your-face smell of sugar icing and cake batter and some hint of fruit fills the room, and Tom scrunches up his nose while he watches it bubble up into thick froth, just the kind that Josh likes.

Tom starts to brush his teeth while he waits for the tub to fill all the way. he showered just before bed last night, so he figures if Josh actually wants sex this morning he'll be clean enough for that, but his mouth tastes like sleep and grit and empty stomach. he's scrubbing all the way at his back teeth when Josh joins him at the sink to spit his own mouthful of toothpaste and rinse.

“Daddy?” he asks once again, right as he's wiping the excess water off his chin.

Tom just makes a humming noise in response.

“thanks again.”

Tom hums some more, and when Josh winds both arms around his waist, he slings one arm around him in return.

and apparently, that sound must have made his confusion obvious, because he's not used to Josh being like this, because Josh continues, “for taking care of me this morning.” in the mirror, Josh blinks with sleepy eyes when he continues, “and in general, I guess. 'cause I feel like I just take you being my daddy for granted a lot of the time when I shouldn't.” his chin comes to rest on Tom's shoulder and he says, all soft and quiet even by little space standards, “so I guess thank you for letting me be like this. and for wanting to be my daddy.”

and then his face is smushed sideways into Tom's shoulder and he's making a low sad little boy noise like he might start crying again, and besides, Tom figures his teeth must be clean by now, so he leans forward just enough to spit into the sink.

“shh,” he goes, now that he's able to make proper sounds again, and he turns enough so he can properly face Josh, and so he can bring one hand up to Josh's cheek to remove his face from his dressing gown. to his relief, Josh isn't actually crying, but his red bottom lip is still trembling like he's ready to start at any moment, and Tom has to lean forward and kiss the shakes from his face. “it's all right, baby.” and he strokes over Josh's face, over the soft curve of his hip, and watches Josh's expression slowly clear up. “no need to get so emotional.”

Josh nods and rubs his face against Tom's shoulder once more. like this, he's all there, Tom can feel his breath, the soft of his chest through his thin t-shirt and his own dressing gown, feel how his nipples are hardening and can't help but wonder if it's from the cold or if he's actually aroused.

“I'm sorry.”

Josh clings tighter around Tom's middle, so tight it throws him off balance for a split second, and Tom has to steady himself with scrabbling fingers so he doesn't send them both crashing to the floor. he shushes Josh some more, presses a kiss into his hair, and says, “no, no, don't be.” his hands stroke Josh's shoulders and he watches when Josh raises his head to make eye contact once again. “you know I love being your daddy.” the way he says it, it sounds reassuring to his own ears as well. “love you.”

Josh makes a low “mm” in his throat and leans forward so he can press a quick kiss onto Tom's lips, and he says, “love you too, Daddy.”

Tom hums back and lets his fingers trail down from Josh's shoulders to his back, so he can feel the gentle heave of his ribcage. really, he likes this, just standing there with Josh around him and against him, but his feet are getting cold and there's goosebumps running up his spine, so he kisses Josh's ear and asks, “you want to get in the bath now?”

“yeah.” Josh steps back a little ways and toes off his socks and affirms, “bath.”

Tom gets undressed quickly, dressing gown hung up by the door and pants thrown in the laundry basket, and Josh watches him step into the bath while he starts to pull his own briefs down. the foam licks at his skin when he sinks in to the chest, almost identical shades of pink-shimmering white, and that in turn tears at Josh's insides, makes his cock feel all too sensitive in the fresh air. he's been hard for an embarrassing while now already, can't keep himself from it, and he knows Tom isn't looking when he pulls off the t-shirt that had been hiding it from view, but he still feels self-conscious over it.

the bath is just how he likes it when he steps inside to sit between Tom's legs, just hot enough to feel the water's trying to get underneath his skin, the layer of bubbles thick enough to completely cover his body from view. he relaxes, down into Tom's arms around his middle, and exhales a moan that definitely wasn't meant to come out sounding as sexual as it did.

“that good?” Tom asks, soft laugh in his voice, and his breath on Josh's ear is driving Josh mad.

“so good,” Josh confirms, but he shudders when Tom's fingers interweave and press patterns across the patch of skin on his lower belly, only a few inches away from his cock. shudders some more when he settles closer against Tom, close enough to feel Tom's soft cock align with the base of his spine.

a flush is creeping up into his face and neck, Josh can feel even through the hot water, and he knows it's pure shame. he's ashamed of how needy he gets on some days, needy for Tom to spread him out and fuck him and make him feel all cared for in the sexual way, when he'd only meant to relax in little space and have Tom be his daddy for a while. more ashamed than he is of that in the first place, because there should be a line between when he's a little boy and when he wants Tom's long fingers curling and twisting up his front hole and Tom's cock in his arse until he whines and squirms with tears.

he's actually squirming a little bit at the thought of that, relishing what friction he can get on his cock by folding his legs tightly, and he squirms some more when Tom starts laying kisses onto his shoulders.

“Daddy?” he asks, and he wants to wind down, just sink into Tom's soft mouth but he's been thinking about sex pretty much since Tom had brought him breakfast. what he mainly wants is a distraction.

Tom's mouth vibrates in a hum against the knob of his shoulderblade for a second, makes Josh squirm some more before he asks, “what is it, bear?”

“wash my hair for me?”

“I can do that.”

and he lets Tom run one wet hand through his hair, guide his head back to kiss him when he's stroking all the hair to one side of Josh's head. it was supposed to be just a short kiss, Josh knows that, Tom's lips soft and his tongue not sneaking out, but he can't not deepen it, has to lick into Tom's mouth and growl a little. how is he supposed to not do that when Tom's hand is still holding his hand in place and how is he not supposed to grind his hips back and forth to get at least a bit of stimulation on his cock. he can't.

“needy boy,” Tom points out when they pull apart, more chiding than anything else. his hand trails deeper down onto Josh's stomach, just a little ways away from his cock. “how you feeling?”

and Tom knows, there's no way he's that oblivious to miss all the little movements from Josh, or that oblivious to miss his blatant attempt to touch Tom's dick, for that matter. Tom's dick that's still all too present at the small of Josh's back and Josh is aching to get it inside him, and to get Tom's hands and mouth all over him.

he has to resist the urge to roll his hips into the frictionless water some more when he answers, “squirmy,” and he doesn't mean for that to come out sounding suggestive. “sorry I'm so needy, Daddy.”

Tom says something that sounds much like “cute when you're needy” against Josh's cheekbone when he moves to kiss it once more, and then he's moving his hand, probably to reach for the bottle of gentle no-tears-no-tangles shampoo that's sitting on the cabinet with all the bubble baths still.

there's the sound of the bottle uncapping and the scent of plastic-y strawberries mingling with the all-encompassing pink cake, and then Tom unwinds his one hand that was still sitting on Josh's lower belly.

“can you bend forward for me, babe?”

and Josh does, torso resting up against his folded knees. he watches the bubbles floating around him, watches as they lick at his chest and just barely conceal it from view, and that's when he changes his mind and shuts his eyes.

Tom's fingers are gentle when they start to lather up his hair, nails scratching softly at his scalp as Tom works the shampoo in strand by strand and uses the suds to plaster them all to Josh's skull. he kisses the now exposed nape of Josh's neck when his hands move forward to what hair is still hanging down around Josh's face, and then he seems to be done because he's leaning even further forward, chest to Josh's back, obviously going for the detachable showerhead.

“tell me if it's too warm, okay, bear?” and then the water starts running once again.

“uh huh.” Josh nods. he doesn't think he can make any more words than that, doesn't think he wants to, and it's not even from how stupidly turned on he is. but the thing is, he feels safe like this, with Tom's fingers in his hair and gently rinsing it off, Tom's legs around him and Tom's soft lips at his shoulder again when he's combing all the residue suds from his hair with his fingers. completely safe and cared for, and that's so much it actually hurts in his chest a little, up in his throat, and he makes a little overwhelmed noise in the back of his throat.

and Tom turns the water off. “hey?” he reaches to put the showerhead back and asks, “you crying again?”

Josh shakes his head. “'m not crying.” there's a strain forming in his spine, though, so he rises up to lie back against Tom's chest once more. “just really happy. that's all.”

“that's good.”

Tom's hands come to rest dangerously close to Josh's groin once more, fingers folding up, and Josh hums in approval.

“Daddy.”

he preens with the adoration and the feeling in his chest when Tom goes ahead and lays a line of sloppy kisses from Josh's shoulder up his neck to his cheek and the corner of his mouth, and his cock twitches some more because apparently the amount of sappy feelings and ache in Josh's insides wasn't enough to make it go soft.

“honest, little bear.” and Tom's hand moves down to the soft of Josh's thigh. his long fingers pry between his legs easily, so, so close to his slit it makes something in there twitch with want. “did you want a bath to get clean or because you wanted me to touch you?”

of course he knows, he knows and he probably wants it just as much, and still Josh can't help but feel terribly, horribly inappropriate when he lays his hand on top of Tom's and starts to inch it further up his thigh.

“both,” he says. “want to clean up down there and also,” and he can't say it, not without feeling weird about asking Tom to get him off when he's in little space, so instead, he just lays Tom's hand on top of his hard cock.

Tom chuckles, deep and low and with that stupid dominant aura he's got around it. his fingers dig down deeper into the flesh and Josh parts his legs for it, pointer and middle finger spread around his cock so the tips of them are left and right of his slit to pull it open a little ways. just then, he kisses Josh's neck again, the sensitive spot beneath his ear, and the moan Josh lets out is definitely embarrassing.

“so does that mean you want me to help you clean up?” Tom asks.

his voice is so stupid and cocky it just makes Josh's insides burn some more, like every hole on his body is yelping for Tom to put his dick in already. or maybe that's because he's kneading into the flesh now, fingers just barely brushing at the open sensitive part of Josh, or maybe it's because his dick is still lying at the small of Josh's back but it doesn't feel soft any more.

either way, Josh is so obnoxiously turned on and at the same time so deeply stuck in his safe little-boy state of mind he can't answer without giggling. “I can clean up by myself, Daddy.” his fingers come to cover Tom's again, push them deeper into his own flesh and harder up against his cock, and he continues. “need you to help me with this.”

and Tom's doing that obnoxious chuckle again when his fingers dip down deep between Josh's legs, one hand completely covering his slit so the heel of it finally puts that friction on Josh's cock he's been needing.

“yeah,” he says, then, and his fingers catch on the very rim of Josh's front hole, not like he's trying to press inside but just to test the reaction he will get. which consists of Josh making a soft rumbly noise that took entirely too much effort for it to not come out desperate. “I'll do that for you, babe.”

his hand moves so he can touch Josh's cock properly, press out tiny growls and get him to relax that bit more. so relaxed his head dips all the way backwards onto Tom's shoulder and his legs slump out as straight as they can get in the tub, like his bones are made of jelly because all the nerves and tension are now focussed into his cock and slit.

“d'you want me to touch your cock?” Tom asks, which, Josh dully notes in the back of his head, is an extremely stupid question because Tom already is touching his cock.

that's not what he needs, though, what he needs right now is for Tom to get his fingers in him and make him come just like that, make his muscles lock up and his bones rattle without stimulating his cock much at all, and so, Josh shakes your head. “want your fingers, Daddy.”

his eyes fall all the way shut from being droopy and unfocussed already when Tom kisses at his jaw again, all while he can feel Tom manoeuvring to get the dispenser of lube from where they keep it sitting on the rim of the bathtub.

“spread your legs for me, babe?”

and then Tom's fingers are gone and Josh can't help but feel disappointed by the lack of contact, but he opens up all the same. the cool air of the bathroom hits his knees when they push through the froth, a stark contrast to how hot the water is and how hot he himself is inside, and the goosebumps that form on the skin there make him shock and shiver. then he shivers some more when Tom's fingers are back and covered with viscous slick.

Tom rubs his fingertips from Josh's front hole all the way across his slit to his cock, spreading a layer of lube all across him, and Josh can't keep his hips from squirming into it.

“Daddy,” he insists, and nothing else, doesn't need to say anything else because Tom already knows what he wants.

Tom tuts. “thought good boys were supposed to not squirm about all needy like you do.” he lays yet another kiss onto Josh's cheek, where the skin suddenly feels hotter in contrast to Tom's soft lips than it did before. of course Josh's blushing at that, because it's not enough that he's desperate for a touch and wound up, no, he's being chided for it, too. Tom's other hand settles down deep on Josh's belly once more, keeping him steady, and he asks, “you gonna be a good little boy and stay still for me when I touch you?”

and Josh's giggling some more, and it's maybe from the way Tom's stubble is scratching at his skin when he keeps on kissing the sensitive spots at Josh's neck or the fact that Tom's fingers are teasing along his slit again, not applying enough pressure to really be satisfying, or maybe it's just because Josh needs some way to unload all that tension inside even if it's not his preferred way of doing it.

“I'll be good,” he insists.

“of course you'll be.”

Tom latches his mouth onto Josh's throat, sucking to mark, and if that wasn't enough to make Josh keen, the first of Tom's slender fingers inching its way past the first and then the second knuckle into Josh's front hole definitely does it. the sensation of being stretched is a sharp pang at first, as it always is, but as soon as Tom's finger rubs all over the sensitive inner walls where Josh had been itching to get touched for too long now that pain turns pleasurable. it goes in deeper, all the way to the hilt, crooking up towards Josh's pelvic bone in search of that one spot that makes him see stars. but it's not enough, not enough stretch and not enough pressure, and so Josh sighs deep in relief when a second finger tucks itself into him.

“this what you need?” Tom asks, soft and fond, and Josh nods maybe a little too enthusiastically.

his skin throbs where Tom had detached his mouth from it, where there must be a fat bruise blooming now, and the movement probably makes it burn even worse. that's the same burn as he's feeling where he's being stretched at the edge of his hole, the same burn from Tom's fingers curling inside him, and he craves more of that burn, so much more. a tiny growl slips out of his mouth when Tom crooks his fingers faster and harder, dead on into that spot. his fingers clench into water and curl into empty fists, struggling to steady himself with something, and so Josh goes for the lip of the tub.

Tom's chuckling behind him once again, so stupidly self-assured and in control that it makes Josh's insides melt that bit further and his cock that bit harder against the bit of friction he's still getting from Tom's palm on every jab of his fingers.

“that's it,” Josh presses out, the words slurred almost beyond recognition, and when Tom quickens his rhythm, he says it again, “that's it, that's it.” and, “can I have another finger, Daddy?”

and he does get another one, that and Tom's lips back on his throat to suck a second mark while he's easing in with all three fingers, and the burn is so much Josh actually opens his mouth for a fully-fledged groan. no way he's going to last much longer.

Tom fingerfucks him quickly now, aiming at Josh's g-spot with every thrust to press out more sounds, harsh, deep breaths and tiny moans, and he knows, too, has to know by the way Josh is struggling to stay still in his hold. his own cock is pressing all too hard into Josh's back now, hot and twitchy just from what he's doing to Josh, and Josh needs it, needs to have Tom's cock fucking all that out of him instead of just his fingers.

“close already?”

there's no real noise Josh makes in reaction, only a vague nod and turn of his head toward Tom's. just then, when he means to ask for a kiss, Tom's hand is pressing pointedly into the bit of flesh above his pubic bone, down on the same spot his other fingers are thrusting up into, and so, Josh yelps, high-pitched and embarrassing.

he gets that kiss he wanted either way, Tom eats up all his noises greedily, tongue fucking into his mouth with the same rhythm as his fingers. the same rhythm his front hole is beginning to twitch with, in fact, he's this close from just a few short minutes of getting fingered and all he wants is that release already.

“what d'you want to do after this?”

“Iunno.” and Josh hates when Tom does this to him, when he makes him try to speak in full sentences when he's that far gone. he hates Tom's cock rubbing at his back, so, so close to where he needs it, and he groans again at that thought. “back to bed. want your cock in my arse. mouth on my cock.”

he's fluttering quicker and quicker around Tom's fingers now, as if he could get them any deeper like that. Josh is burning, up his spine and all around the inner lining of his front hole, down in the pit of his stomach.

“such language,” Tom chides, and that's that for Josh.

he comes right then, eyelids tightening and hips rocking down hard enough to make waves in their tub, riding it out on Tom's fingers until his muscles go back to pliant and he comes back down.

his insides feel too open when Tom pulls out, the satisfied little hum on his lips fades out into a disappointed noise.

“thanks, Daddy,” he breathes when Tom gentles his hand over his slit one more time, and he preens when Tom kisses his temple. his voice comes out shaky from the orgasm, insides still working with the aftershocks of it. his heart's booming so hard he can feel it in his ribcage.

“you okay, bear?”

“okay.” this one's less shaky-sounding, but he's still trembling deep down, in the most pleasant way possible. “that was good.” Tom's cock is still rubbing painfully obvious against him, and really, that wasn't near enough, because Josh is still horny and hard and needy for more. so he says it, “I want more.”

Tom hums. he gets them both into a more upright position and asks, “reckon I can leave you alone for now? so you can wash up and I can get everything ready for you?”

and Josh nods. he doesn't really want Tom to leave, not just yet, but on the other hand, he's all too excited about going back to bed and getting more.

“won't take too long,” Tom says against his neck. “promise.”

getting everything ready, that is to say, by the time Josh flops down onto the mattress next to him, Tom's changed the bedding and put a soft blanket underneath the duvet, and Josh's favourite soft toy, a big brown bear named Boots, is sitting by the pillowcase. he's picked out Josh's favourite plaid flannel pyjamas from their wardrobe and helped Josh do the first three buttons from the top and pick the tangles from his wet hair, and now he's watching Josh burrow his face in Boots' soft fur with the most satisfied little boy giggle he can imagine.

“come over here, Daddy.”

and the thing is, Tom is still hard, dick a fat hot line in the thin fabric of the sweatpants he'd thrown on. when he fits himself between Josh's spread thighs to attach his lips to Josh's neck, the side he hasn't mottled with bruises yet, his cock rubs right against Josh's slit through the two thin layers of bottoms. he growls at the friction he's been needing, actually growls and makes Josh giggle with it. the hollow of his neck smells like strawberry cake, skin soft and pink and Tom can't keep from rutting down against where he knows Josh's even softer and pinker and still wet with what's either left over lube or his own slickness

he's needy for it, needy to do what Josh's asked of him and make him come, condoms and lube and Josh's favourite vibe all ready for that on the bedside, and needy to come himself more than anything.

“Daddy,” Josh says again, mock pouty. “come kiss me properly.” his arms snake around Tom's torso, plush bear gentle on his back.

Tom's not going to, not just yet, first he's got to mouth all over Josh's neck and make him squirm on his cock some more. when he's done with that, he clenches one fist in Josh's wet hair, carefully to guide Josh's head into position rather than to pull and licks down deep into his soft lips. he likes kissing Josh best when he's little like this, when he's all gentle and open and permitting, without the harsh tongue and tiny fangs putting up a fight against Tom's mouth as usual, but this time around, he's a bit disappointed to find that Josh doesn't taste like strawberries, too.

they keep kissing for a little bit, mouths sliding together at the same sloppy speed their hips are working against each other, until Tom is pretty sure Josh's soaked all the way through his pyjamas, the outline of his slit all warm and soft with slick against Tom's own sensitive cock that's started to bubble out precome as well. he's making those little desperate groans again, too, arms clamped so tightly around Tom's torso that Boots the bear is rubbing tightly against his back with every roll of his hips. Tom wants to go through with it already and taste that slick, wants to suck Josh's cock until he almost cries and then fuck him until he actually cries.

“you smell so nice, babe,” he whispers into Josh's neck when he pulls back, takes another whiff of Josh's candy scent. “surely you taste as good as you smell, too?” and okay, that's cheesy even for Tom's standards, but in his defence, he apparently has this air that lets him successfully deliver lines like that.

it makes Josh giggle at the very least, soft and easy with his head thrown back, or maybe that's Tom's hands sneaking into where his pyjama top is unbuttoned to play a rhythm down his ticklish sides to his waistband. Tom goes for his exposed neck once more, peppering kisses onto the spots he knows make Josh grind his hips up for more contact and press out cute horny little boy sounds between giggles.

“what do you say I suck your cock like you asked me to in the bath?”

and Tom's thumbs hook into Josh's soft flannel bottoms to tug them down past his hipbones. for that, he gets Josh's blunt nails scratching down his back and a sound of approval, fingers clawing at his arse under the sweatpants in a way that makes his dick twitch more than he'd like to admit it.

“that your way of saying yes, you want your cock sucked, bear?” Tom asks. he's seen Josh like this sometimes already, too far in little space and subspace to bother with making words any more, and that's usually okay because they'd already negotiated what Tom would do to Josh in subspace before the scene. just, this time around Tom wasn't planning on getting Josh into subspace in the first place.

and Josh shakes his head in response.

“no cocksucking?”

“yeah.” Josh bites his puffy lip and sucks on it for a split moment, and he says, “no, I mean, I do want you to suck my cock.” he tugs Tom's sweatpants down past his bum and adds, “can you get those off for me, Daddy?”

Tom's quick to comply with that. the cool air on his cock when it slaps up against his stomach feels almost too much like a relief when he kneels up and shimmies out from his bottoms, and judged from the look in Josh's eyes, he's not the only one glad to be rid of them.

“didn't want to be the only one here who's all naked,” Josh says, little giggle in his voice still.

Tom laughs back at him. “all right.”

like this, kneeling between Josh's thighs, Tom can really see the wet spot between his legs when his thumbs slip into his waistband once more, slick dark in contrast to the light grey. he wants to get a taste so badly, but he's not taking Josh's bottoms off quite yet.

“you still here with me, bear?” he asks, and once again, that question is just to be sure.

Josh's got Boots pressed up against his chest some more, nose almost buried in its fur, so it's hard to tell from his face alone whether he is or not, but his voice comes out reasonably clear, “all here. just little.”

he looks so incredibly soft at that moment, soft eyes peeking out behind the stuffed bear's head, and soft to the touch too with his clean pink skin and his drying hair and fluffy pyjamas. it almost makes Tom ache a little bit.

Josh's voice is that bit softer as well when he keeps speaking, “little's good.” he wiggles his hips underneath Tom's hands, as if to tell him to get on with it already.

so Tom does. “true,” he says, hands making quick work of getting Josh's pyjama trousers down to below his hips, “lift your legs a bit, babe?”

Josh is already squeezing his eyes shut when Tom only just pulls his bottoms down to his bent knees and then off, breathing a little heavier. when Tom's hands stroke up his inner thighs to spread them out a little farther, he makes a soft noise, fingers curling into Boots' plush and slit twitching against no stimulation at all. Tom shuffles down the bed to take a better look, that and so he can finally suck Josh off like they'd both wanted it, dick sliding heavy against the bedspread.

Josh's completely soaked, even more than Tom would have figured, slick spilling out left and right from the lips of his slit onto his inner thighs and some running down to his arsehole. his slit is deep pink and heated when Tom runs one hand all along it, front hole clenching as one finger dips in towards it. what really gets to Tom's cock is the smell, though, strong and clean and needy like some animal pheromone thing, and the musky sweet taste of the slick that's stained his fingers.

“Daddy?” Josh's voice asks, “are you going to suck me off now?”

“yeah.” Tom leans all the way in, until he can press a kiss into the junction of Josh's inner thigh and groin, and then another on the opposite side, only this close from his slit. he grips at the back of Josh's inner thighs, spreads them just a little wider for him, and says, “still now.”

he goes in for a couple long licks all the way up Josh's slit first, lapping up as much slick as he can get until it's beginning to stick to his lips, and only then he licks all the way to Josh's cock.

“I was right,” he observes when that lick presses a breathy sigh out from Josh's mouth, close enough that his breath hits Josh's cock as he speaks. “you do taste good.”

he gets an impatient little noise from Josh for that, one knee moving in to poke his side, and an extremely bratty-sounding, “Daddy.”

and Tom does kind of feel bad for not sucking Josh's cock already, especially since he wants to do it himself almost as much as Josh wants him to, but on the other hand, it's too much fun to leave him desperate on the edge like this.

“sorry, baby bear.” he laughs. “I'll get on with it.”

another thing that's too much fun is to make Josh squirm from just a short moment of stimulation, and so, Tom purses his lips and presses a kiss right to the sensitive head of Josh's cock. which gets him exactly what he expected, Josh rolls his hips into it and tightens his muscles under Tom's grip, but he doesn't get too much out of it except for one hand patting him where his thigh joins up into his bum.

“can you budge up a bit so I can see your face?”

“okay.”

when Josh is halfway to sitting upright against the headboard, Tom pulls away one hand that's still clutching Boots to his chest and keeps both their entangled hands sitting on Josh's inner thigh.

“there you go.”

and that's about the only warning Josh gets before Tom goes for it and encloses his cock with his lips. his fingers clench about as soon as Tom flicks his tongue up the underside for the first time, and when Tom raises his gaze to see Josh's face, his expression is clenching up too. he's got his eyes closed as always when he's getting head, sure, but when Tom applies some suction and more tongue, his mouth twists from already grotesque to some even grotesquer grimace. his eyelids screw shut so tightly it must be painful, and Tom can't help but laugh around his cock.

it's that vibration in turn that snaps Josh's mouth out of being stretched thin and tight at the corner. he groans, high-pitched and whiny and sounding suspiciously like “Daddy,” and that only reminds Tom of how stupidly hard his cock is. he wants to unwind Josh, wants him begging to get fucked so he can give it to him like they both need it, and he can't tell if it's that thought or Josh's continued needy noises as he alternates between sucking harder and easier that's making the arousal in his lower stomach stir.

“relax, bear,” Tom breathes when he's pulling off again, just for a short second this time.

if he'd gone for it before then it's so much more than “going in for it” when he slips his mouth back over Josh's cock, jaw cracking with it. he keeps his eyes fixed on Josh's face when he starts to work his tongue again. this time, he gets messy with it, keeps licking down to Josh's slit to lap up more slick and get it on his face while his thumb rubs over Josh's cock, which gives Josh the most stressful scrunched-up facial expression. his hips roll up and his grip on Tom's fingers goes from already tight to vice-like until Tom goes back up to his cock. at one point or two, he actually dips into Josh's front hole, tongue-fucks him when he's already loose and open and clenching for it, and gets sharp little keens and blunt fingernails scratching at the back of his hand for it.

Tom likes going down on Josh best when he's little like this, he thinks, when he doesn't even make an attempt to hold back. when he growls and moans and twists his face in an almost cartoonish manner when Tom gives his cock an especially hard flick of his tongue, the occasional breathy Daddy slipping out, too.

by the time Tom pulls away, his dick is so hard, dragging heavy against his leg despite not getting any real stimulation, and he can tell Josh is holding off on coming, too, the corners of his eyes stained with moisture. Josh makes a whiny noise when the stimulation on his cock is gone, but Tom strokes his thumb along his hand to tide him over.

“hey,” he whispers, and he makes a point of pressing another kiss to Josh's inner thigh when his hands go down to cup his bum. “what do you say I get you ready for my cock now?”

instead of a real answer, Josh makes a little noise of approval and wiggles his hips forward.

“yes?”

Josh sucks on his red bottom lip and nods enthusiastically. “want your cock, Daddy,” he says, slushed with sex and little space.

Tom hates this, hates how much Josh calling him that alone riles him up and how much more it riles him up when he's also blatantly asking for Tom's cock in the same sentence. he has to sit up and shuffle over a little ways to get the lube, leaves the condoms sitting on the bedside for now, though, but he makes a grab for the magic wand vibrator too while he's at it. every little brush of his cock against his own skin when he moves is bordering on painful, and he's pretty sure he won't last long once he's inside Josh.

when he settles back in his previous spot, Josh is spread out even wider for him, so wide it must be straining at his hamstrings, and he rolls his hips in a tiny circle when Tom's hands go back to where they were on his thighs, too, really digging into the meat there this time. he makes a motion to turn Josh's lower half sideways, for easier access, and Josh complies, even with his movements sluggish and a pout on his face.

“come onnow,” Josh says, no, really slurs by now what's with how far gone he is, and he squeaks when Tom pinches his skin in retaliation.

“quiet now, love.”

really, Tom wants to actually chide him, wants to tell him to be a good boy but he doesn't think he can drag this out much longer. still doesn't mean he doesn't have the time to push Josh's leg up towards his torso and lap up the slick that's dripped down onto his arsehole, though. he could get Josh open with his tongue rather than his fingers, yes, could make him squirm and whine and open up for his cock that way, but.

“not like this,” Josh whines when Tom's barely two shallow strokes in. “your fingers, Daddy.”

which doesn't mean Tom is just going to stop licking over his hole, though, no. he drags one finger along Josh's slit, gets it nice and covered in slick so he can fit it where the muscle has already been loosened by his tongue, burrowing in to his first knuckle. Josh's hole is flushed, not near as red as his cock and slit but pinking further when Tom pushes his finger in a little deeper, and Tom wants to lick it some more, soothe the stretched skin with his tongue, so he does.

somewhere above him, Josh breathes, “fuck,” heavy and quiet with his legs twitching for it, and then, “can I have another?”

“'f course, babe.”

Tom reaches for the lube, drizzles some more over what part of his pointer finger isn't inside Josh yet and then coats his other fingers thoroughly before he tucks the tip of the middle one in. he can feel Josh's entrance relaxing, the muscle opening up easily when he starts to work both his fingers in deeper. the thought of how it's going to feel when he's fucking Josh is making Tom ache, the thought of pressing all those little sighs and gasps out of Josh with his cock, and he crooks his fingers in towards Josh's g-spot just to hear him growl a little louder.

“Daddy,” Josh presses out, and it'd be hard to comprehend normally but he's also pressing Boots right against his face now. “Daddy...”

“yeah?” Tom asks, and really, he doesn't mean for his voice to come out sounding that little bit smug. except he does feel smug, what's with the way Josh's fingers are clawing into his stuffed bear's soft fur and with how the slick is basically dripping from his slit, and Tom can't help but be satisfied by the fact that he was the one to get Josh like that. “how're you feeling, baby bear?”

instead of an actual response, Josh just squirms and groans, or maybe that's because Tom is driving his fingers into that spot once again.

“come on, love. show me your face use your words for me?” and the thing is, Tom won't stop curling his fingers inside Josh to get him panting and needy. “how's this feel for you?”

after a second of heavy breathing and twitching muscles, Josh finally replies, “another?” and he's got tiny tear stains underneath his eyes, Tom can see now, and that's not even the worst part.

his voice sounds so incredibly wrecked it makes Tom's cock blurt out a fat bead of precome, and also, makes Tom want to take pity on him. he slides his third finger in there smoothly to the knuckle, feeling no resistance when he starts to push outward to stretch the muscle further. at the same time, Josh's still so incredibly snug around him, velvety walls contracting around his knuckles in time with his breaths and little noises, and Tom knows he must be close by now.

“talk to me, little bear. come on?”

and Josh growls and sighs and tries to push his hips back against Tom's fingers inside him.

“how d'you feel?”

“feel so nice. you're so good.” Josh squirms about some more when Tom keeps on teasing at his g-spot, and then he continues, “make me feel all good and loved up, Daddy.”

and yeah, of course that makes Tom's cock twitch, but it also tugs on his heart just a tiny bit. “you close yet?”

“mm. close,” and Josh nods, just in case there was any doubt left, and says, “think I'm ready for you to fuck me now.”

and of course, Tom isn't going to say no to that, not when his own cock is so desperate to be inside Josh, but still, he doesn't withdraw his fingers just yet, not when Josh's just about to tip over the edge. “d'you want to come first?”

and of course Josh just has to shake his head to that, all red lips and far gone and that, and reply, “not until your cock's inside me.”

and of course Josh regrets saying that about as soon as Tom has pulled his fingers out.

really, he's not even sure what he's holding back for, but it's making him ache, in his cock and insides and up his spine like a fire's lit up somewhere in him. he's only vaguely aware of the sound of more lube being squirted out, but then Tom is pressing the slick head of his cock against his arsehole and Josh's definitely aware of that.

Tom pushes in gently, not all too slow, and it doesn't feel like being stretched, really, more like he's being filled up by a missing piece or something like that, like an itch that's being scratched.

“like this?”

“just like this.”

Tom's cock fits into him just right, much like how Tom's hips fit against his arse and his fingers onto his hip and thigh holding them in place. he's got trouble keeping his eyes open by now, but Josh can still make out the expression on Tom's face, that look of total satisfaction when he rocks his hips back and then forward again and straight into that spot that's lighting Josh's insides up. and that's all nice and good and runs goosebumps along his chest and shivers up his spine, but Josh wants more than that, more contact that isn't just Boots' fur sticking to his chest with sweat.

“Daddy,” he breathes, right when Tom thrusts in again and distorts his voice with need, “come kiss me, Daddy?”

the kiss is messy when they do it, Tom's hands planted on the pillowcase left and right of Josh's head how they both like it, tongues licking past each other needily. they're both groaning into it, too, but even then that's still not enough contact for Josh's liking.

“I'm not gonna last long inside you,” Tom growls out when Josh loops both arms around his back to pull him close, until there's only plush bear separating their torsos from each other.

and Josh knew that was coming, because Tom gets just as stupidly desperate as he does when they're fucking like this, while he's a little boy, and so he just breathes, “that's okay.” really, it is, as long as Tom keeps laying kisses all across his face and around his mouth and keeps his thrusts steady and aimed for the right spot.

“d'you want your wand?” Tom asks, more into Josh's mouth than anything else, and Josh nods so quickly it would probably make his head spin if it wasn't for the whole getting dicked thing.

really, he could probably get off just from Tom's cock, get fucked into a burning-explosive full body orgasm, but he's too desperate to want that by now, he wants it quick and dirty. Tom has to stretch a little ways to plug the vibrator in by the bedside, and then it's whirring to life in his hand and the next second, right between Josh's legs on his slit, and Josh wants to shout.

well, he doesn't shout, but the “fuck” that comes out of his mouth is definitely louder than it should have been, and he can see Tom smirking about it, so to shut him up preventively, Josh grabs him by the short hair at the back of his head and kisses him again. not that that's going to stop Josh from making weird noises himself, but still.

there's a reason this vibe is his favourite, the vibrating head strong enough to rattle him down to the bones, and Josh can't do too much with how his legs are positioned other than actually reach for Tom's wrist and guide it to get the bulk of that vibration right on his cock. his cock that's so sensitive and ready to come with the stimulation he's getting both from the direct contact and Tom fucking up against his g-spot over and over with steady thrusts.

“Daddy,” Josh whines when he finally lets up from the kiss, the only coherent thought he can form at that moment, and there's tears welling up in the corners of his eyes yet again, fuck.

“you're going to come?” Tom asks.

his arm that's still holding him up above Josh is starting to buckle, so he must be close too, and for a second, Josh can't reply in any way other than by scrabbling down Tom's back with his fingers. he knows he should, and he wants to come, so, so badly, but at the same time, he wants to ride it out that much longer. but that's when Tom plants his free hand on his cheek and slips his thumb in his mouth and he kind of stops thinking about it.

“it's okay, bear.” Tom connects their mouths even with his hand in the way there and says, “you can relax and come for me if you like.”

maybe that's what Josh had been waiting for, because he hiccups with the tears that are starting to flow again and closes his lips tighter around Tom's thumb when his cock pulses with pleasure and ache and need. and yeah, that's probably a sign of how far gone he is, but it takes Josh a few split seconds to realise that's actually it, he's coming, muscles locking up and eyes squeezing shut.

Tom lets him ride it out, fucks him with quicker thrusts now and keeps on kissing him, keeps whispering things to him that don't really sound like anything to Josh's ears, but he eats it up all the same.

“Daddy,” he goes once again when he's coming down, when he can feel Tom finish inside him. his heartbeat is going so fast it's overwhelming, really, and he thinks he can feel Tom's heartbeat in his chest, too, which is disgustingly sappy, but also how he feels at that moment. he's not sure if he can find any words to express that, so after a few seconds he just repeats, “Daddy.”

“hey, little boy,” Tom whispers to him and makes a move to sit up, but Josh pulls him in with what strength he's got left in his arms.

“stay in me a little longer?”

and Tom looks fucked out like this, like that's the last thing he wants, but he doesn't say no. his fingers stroke up Josh's cheek and into his hair on the pillows, and he asks, “you okay?”

“very okay,” Josh says. “just tired. and little.”

“that's good.”

Tom leans in to kiss his nose when he reaches to pull his cock out, and then Josh feels mildly uncomfortable for a second, and also a little disgusting. not disgusting enough to want to get up just yet, though. “can we have a nap, Daddy?”

Tom puts on his obnoxious stern dad face. “what do you say we wash off in the shower and then nap on the couch?”

and Josh pouts, but really, he's not in the mood to sleep in a wet spot or have all that sweat dry on his skin. “fine.” his legs still feel wobbly when Tom helps him into his discarded pyjama bottoms, but he feels too relaxed to let it bother him that much, really. his brain feels a little wobbly too, now that he's all wound down and all loved up.

it's just right.