Chapter Text
Jeon Jungkook was 15 when his hyungs started to leave.
One by one they started to move like clouds on a particularly windy day, with the kind of breeze that’s just too cold against skin. Too cold against his heart.
First it was Jin, and Yoongi.
Both being the eldest in their friend group, they decided that staying in Busan for college just wasnt for them.
Jin said he wanted to be a chef, or maybe a nutritionist. He was always good with food, making different dishes to give to all of them claiming it to be leftovers but of course Jin didnt need to know that Jungkook was aware of his little lie.
Yoongi was always good with music so it wasnt a surprise to them when he said he wanted to pursue Music production. And maybe the piano was his first love above everything else (not that anybody actually doesnt know).
They took a gap year to earn enough to get settled in Seoul, after all Culinary and Music production are both expensive degrees to earn.
Hoseok and Namjoon followed them.
Getting a scholarship in one of the best Performing Arts schools in the Country, Hoseok just couldnt say no- dancing has always been his dream after all. The scholarship granting him a place to stay, stipend, and even a chance at a job in a dance studio. It was everything he’d wanted.
Namjoon was always an exemplary student. His teachers were always encouraging him to take up a degree in more difficult studies, so it was a surprise to them when he expressed his desire to take up Literature. And coming from a family and had always given their support to him in his endeavors and with more than enough money to send him to any school he’d choose, he decided to go to Seoul too.
Taehyung and Jimin weren’t supposed to leave so soon.
With everyone leaving for the city, the last of his hyungs didnt want to leave their beloved dongsaeng behind. Their reasons being “Kookie we’re graduating and you’re just in your 2nd year highschool. We cant leave you for two years alone!!” Jimin always answers back, whenever Jungkook asks about their future plans for college.
But they do- eventually. With Jimin's parents nagging him non-stop about continuing his studies. And Taehyung's own family's expectations. They leave, and he bids them goodbye. Taking away- unknowingly, the last piece of Jungkook's happiness with them.
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Now, Jungkook is 19 and He’s starting freshman year in college.
It’s been 2 years, 4 months, and 3 weeks since he’d last seen Taehyung and Jimin or any of his hyungs for that matter.
They all promised things like “We’ll call you every day!!” or “Hyung will try to visit you as much as he can kookie”. He remembers them ruffling his hair, or giving him cuddles back in the abandoned warehouse they sorta turned into their own home. Leaving behind things that mark it as theirs- a recipe book, a few music sheets, some hip hop cds, other things that Jungkook never tried to touch in the 2 years he’d gone there alone.
There used to be a photo on top of the wobbly make-shift coffee table that they found inside the warehouse. And since the table was made of wood, it became a canvas for Taehyung’s random doodles, and if you look twice you might even see some of Jungkook’s own drawings scribbled across the center. The photo was the one that they took at the beach (they went as soon as seokjin got his license). Their backs are turned from the camera that they had to put on top of a couple rocks to get the shot evenly.
It was the only this that Jungkook took from their “Home”. The polariod sits on his bedside table in his dorm here in Seoul. His hyungs never mentioned that moving would be so tiring- but then again they all somehow stopped contacting him.
The adjustment has been jarring, the city was always awake, loud, and people never really stop. The traffic in unending and pedestrians walk left and right. Bustling sounds of the city could be heard blocks away. The lights surrounding the tall building that somehow outshine the stars.
Jungkook misses the sounds of rushing waves.
5 days after moving in his dorm Jungkook grabs his backpack and makes his way 4 blocks down to Seoul National University.
He’s lucky, considering that he wasn't really one of the brightest students back in highschool he still manage to snag a full scholarship in the top university in Korea. He just sent in his portfolio filled with black and white photos and hoped for the best. The response was immediate, filled with praises on how well positioned the angle of the photos were and some other technical things that he didnt really understand. When they asked why his photos were all in monochrome he simply said “everything looks better in black in white” (but it isnt- because there;s this lingering ache in his heart and everything feels dull without his hyungs).
Its when Jungkook reaches the fine arts building when he hears a familiar voice, a loud shrill from one of the classrooms.
He turns and peeks through the glass door and-
“Jiminie!! You’re late!”
Taehyung.
His voice is a bit different- not much noticeable but somehow his voice sounds a lot more hoarse than he remembers. He’s talking to Jimin on the phone, yelling about how hungry he is and how jimin hasnt brought him his lunch-. He’s got red hair now and -oh it suits him so well. His shoulders looking a lot more broad than before-
Jungkook stares.
“Tell the jinnie-hyung thanks for me please!, see you tonight! I love you”
.
The call ends and Jungkook can see a smile starting form across Taehyung's face.
And it hurts
It hurts 'cause he seems so happy, so ecstatic and Jungkook's just breaking and hurting-
Slowly, he starts moving back as Taehyung turns to walk towards the door. His hands are shaking and his eyes are starting to blur-
He sprints out the building despite his next class starting soon. And Jungkook runs and runs till his legs grow tired and he’s out of breath.
Then he’s crouching down and hugging his knees against his chest and-
Why?
Tears rapidly fall down his cheeks and his nose starts to feel stuffy. His hands have been shaking ever since he ran out of the building and he cant stop it. Every breath he takes is a wheeze followed by another and his chest hurts- what did I do wrong? he thought the reason that they stopped contacting him was because they were too busy. That they couldn't even contact everyone else. That everyone moved on and went on to walk their own path, forged their dreams into reality but-
It’s just him.
They only stopped talking to him.
Not here, please not here
He cant breathe.