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"What are you doing right now?"
"I'm lying in my bed, in thisfuckinghouseyoumademerent, talking on the phone with you."
"Hands-free thing?"
"Hands-free thing."
"So your hands are free."
"Um, yes."
"Where are they?"
"At the ends of my arms."
"More specific."
"One's on my stomach, kind of loosely curled. One's sort of picking at the actual phone under the pillow."
"Move that one down. With the other."
"Is this a good idea?"
"For Wesley Jensen and Harold Thorpe to have phone sex in our voices on their mysteriously encrypted line?"
"Um, yeah."
"Does that substantively differ from all-night pillow-talk marathons?"
"Only in degree of obvious intimacy."
"The other calls are pretty obviously not between a couple of pals."
"I'm moving my hand."
"What are you wearing?"
"You didn't just ask me that question."
"I did. You wearing a T-shirt?"
"No. You know I'm not. It's hot and I don't like air-conditioning."
"Neither am I."
"I know. Because you knew your own nefarious purpose in placing this call. You're not wearing anything."
"That's right."
"Are you on top of the covers?"
"Yup."
"Bed's still made."
"Yup."
"You like the way the comforter feels against your back."
"Yup. And the AC's on. It's cool in here."
"Are your nipples hard?"
"Yeah."
"Can you feel the air moving across them?"
"Yeah."
"Lick your finger. Your right finger. Swirl some spit over your right nipple."
"Feels good. It's harder now. Cold. Unh."
"You just shivered."
"Yeah."
"Do the same to the other one. Do them both at once. Stroke them. Light little circles."
"Who called who here?"
"Whom. I'm doing it too. Mine aren't getting that hard. It's warm in here. I'm squeezing a little. Rubbing. To make them swell."
"Crap, Daniel."
"You started it."
"I forgot who -- 'Swell.' Jesus."
"What do you want me to do?"
"Take off any other clothes you're wearing."
"Pajama bottoms."
"Briefs underneath?"
"No."
"Wait then. Wait. Leave them on."
"They're the silky ones. The really thin ones."
"Are you hard?"
"Very hard."
"When did you get hard?"
"When I told you to touch your nipple."
"I was already hard."
"Were you touching yourself when you called me?"
"Yeah. A little. Lightly."
"Idly."
"Yes. Idly."
"Thinking about me. Thinking about calling me."
"Yeah. So I did."
"I really want to touch myself, Jack."
"Right hand. Through the fabric. Don't reach in."
"Mmm. Feels good. Silky."
"You feel the outline of yourself?"
"Yes. I can trace the whole shape."
"Balls too. Stroke your balls. Stroke the silky fabric onto them."
"Feels really good."
"Wish I were feeling that right now."
"I wish I could see you right now. Open your legs."
"Knees up?"
"Knees up. Or out. However's comfortable. Do you feel the cool air?"
"Yeah. It feels good. I feel ... exposed."
"Do you like that?"
"I'd like it better if you were looking at me."
"I am. In my imagination. I love the way your balls pull up when you're hard. They're beautiful. Tight."
"Can I touch them?"
"Just your fingernails. Reach way back. Start from right behind them. Top of the perineum. That's a sweet spot on you."
"Touching it."
"I'm touching mine too. Through the silk. Pressing a little. Rubbing."
"Tell me what to do."
"Stroke your nails up lightly over your scrotum. Don't touch your cock. Do it a few times. Slowly."
"Doing it. You squeeze yours. Through the silk. Rub it around on your balls. Roll them around."
"They feel bigger through the fabric. It feels ... really good. I want you to rub something on me next time."
"God, Danny, this is making me nuts."
"Sorry you started it?"
"No. Touch your cock again. Jerk it through the silk. Not hard."
"Run your fingertips up yours. Just the shaft. Stop at the ridge. Don't touch your head."
"Just up the front?"
"Just up the front. Then up the sides. Lightly. Tease it."
"Oh, man."
"Good?"
"Yeah."
"I'm still jerking."
"Not too hard."
"Very lightly. Just over the silk. These aren't silk though. Nylon."
"Take them off. Fast. I'm just gonna pretend you're doing it slow."
"Are you still teasing your cock?"
"Yeah. Really wanting to touch the head here."
"Touch it."
"How?"
"One fingertip. But don't touch the tip. Just stroke around the rim. Then make circles over the cap. Very light fingertip."
"Are you naked now?"
"Just kicking them off."
"You did it slow anyway."
"Yes. Are you leaking?"
"Maybe a drop. I don't leak as much as you."
"Touch it. Stroke it into the head. Lube your head with it."
"I wish it were your come. I want you to come on my dick sometime. Jerk me with it after."
"Jack."
"Good idea, huh?"
"Yes."
"Or is the correct use of the subjunctive what gets you hot?"
"God, Jack, I love your voice."
"You know you could read me the phone book."
"Would you blow me while I read?"
"Could you hold the phone book up that long?"
"Touch the slit. Run your fingertip into it."
"Ah -- jeeze."
"You love it when I do that with my tongue."
"Yeah."
"Rub your finger on the opening. Pretend it's my tongue."
"Are you touching yourself?"
"No. I'm lying on my back with my legs together and my dick aching. I can feel my pulse. My dick's kind of bouncing a little on my stomach. With every heartbeat. My heart's going pretty fast."
"Open your legs."
"Should I get the lube?"
"I'm not gonna last for that. And if you put fingers up your ass I want to see it."
"You've never watched me masturbate."
"Fix that sometime. You ever say my name when you come? When I'm not there?"
"I don't masturbate much anymore. Save it for you."
"Before me. Before this. Did you say my name?"
"Yes."
"For real?"
"Yes. Are you still touching the tip of your penis?"
"I'm stroking around it."
"Touch it again. Fuck the tip with your finger."
"I want you to take your palm and smear precome down over yourself. All over your cock. There's a lot by now. You leak like crazy."
"I'm ... That feels really ... Move your hand back down to the shaft."
"How?"
"Thumb on one side, fingers flat together on the other side."
"OK."
"Are you holding yourself?"
"Are you?"
"Yes. Is your hand moving?"
"No. You didn't tell me to move it. I didn't tell you to move yours."
"Move your hand. Up and down. Slowly."
"Close your hand. Pump your hand over yourself. Through the come. Not too hard."
"This is how you do yourself."
"Yeah. What I'm doing, that's how you do it."
"Yes. I mean, there are different ways, but that one's the most ... effective. Efficient."
"But you like a lot of stimulation on the head."
"I do that with my other hand if I need to."
"That's ... ambidextrous of you."
"Not really. My right hand's a good lay. My left hand just plays. You want to use your left hand?"
"No. It's mainly the up-and-down that pushes me over."
"You need to feel like you're fucking something."
"Yeah. Push your hips up into your hand."
"Unh."
"See? Feels good. Fuck your hand, Danny."
"I'm gonna ... If I go much faster I'm gonna ... "
"Tell me what to do."
"Jerk yourself. Harder. Faster. Work up to as fast as you can."
"Fluid wrist? Keep the elbow still?"
"Not ... a tennis ... lesson ... "
"You're losing it."
"You're ... laughing ... at me ... "
"I love you. Fuck your hand. Harder. Push your hips up. Dig in with your heels. Push from your knees."
"Jack ... "
"I'm working myself really fast, Danny. My balls just ... ah, christ."
"Oh god ... oh god, Jack, Jack ... "
"Come, Danny. Come. Say my name. Keep saying my name."
"Jack ... unh ... Jack ... unh, unh, nngh, Jack -- "
"Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Ah, fuck, fuck -- Daniel ... "
"Oh my god. Oh, god, Jack. I just, I came so -- I came everywhere."
"Yeah. Fuck. Yeah. Me too. Well ... mostly on myself."
"You have a washcloth?"
"Always prepared."
"I thought so."
"Stop laughing. Just wipe yourself with the sheet. Don't change the bed. I want it to smell like you next time I'm there."
"It always smells like me."
"No, sometimes it smells like Bounce. I want it to smell like sex."
"I want it to smell like you."
"Soon."
"I know."
"Think you can sleep now?"
"Don't hang up."
"I'm leaving the phone on."
"OK. Then I'll sleep. Jack ... "
"Uh-huh?"
"I want to say a lot of sappy maudlin nauseating things right now."
"Yeah. Me too."
"You do not."
"I do too. Wanna hear some?"
"Yes. But not right now. In person. When I can feel you. Kiss you. -- I'm sorry that's such a pansy word."
"Only you would apologize for the inadequacies of the English language after phone sex. I'm kissing you right now, Daniel. Do you feel it?"
"How?"
"Little bit of an angle. Lips a little bit parted."
"What did you have for dinner?"
"Barbecued spare ribs and a Sam Adams."
"Summer Ale?"
"Mm-hm."
"Mmm. Your lips are a little chapped. That planet was windy."
"Dry and windy. You like that though. You like that my hands are rough."
"Are you giving me tongue?"
"Just a little. Just a soft brush. It's time to sleep. I'm kissing you goodnight."
"That's pretty sappy."
"Go to sleep, Daniel."
"OK."
"I'm right here."
"OK. I know."
"I'm not going to sleep until I hear a snore. I know when you're faking."
"OK. I know. Goodnight, Jack."
"Night Daniel."
...
...
"You awake? ... Danny, you awake?"
"Mrrmfgklmmnp."
"I love you, Daniel."
"Mmmnn."