Chapter Text
When I broke Steve’s jaw, I hoped it would all be water under the bridge like it was when he broke my ribs in Siberia. Except my luck never worked that well which is why I currently had Fury standing in front of me and he refused to budge until I listened to him.
“How did you even get in here?” I asked, “didn’t I revoke your access?”
“Yes, you did and yet here I am.” He shrugged.
“What do you want?”
“You broke Steve’s jaw.” Fury said it as a statement, so I just stared at him blankly. It was years in front of the press that allowed me to hide the smile that wanted to slip past my mask. A manic laugh would definitely be too much, but God I just wanted to laugh. “You need to apologise.”
“HA!” I barked, “why in the ever-loving fuck would I do that?”
“Because it will make working with him difficult.”
“And again, I ask, why in the ever-loving fuck would I do that?” I asked, my humour quickly evaporating as I brought my arms to cross in front of me.
“We need you. You’re an Avenger and we still have threats that require your assistance – especially now.” Fury said while looking me up and down.
As I let his words filter in something quickly became abundantly clear as to why he was here. This wasn’t about me as a person, it never was with these people. Fury still didn’t think I was a good teammate and he never would. He only cared about the abilities I now had thanks to Project E. My new abilities and my bank account were the only things he could see out of his eye. He wanted another weapon in his arsenal.
“Let me get this straight.” I said. “You didn’t even want me in your little boy band originally but now you’ve heard I have Extremis in me, you suddenly want me. I bet you just want the formula, tell me I’m wrong.”
Fury paused as he seemed to be thinking of something to say. “It could turn the tides of this war-”
“I’m going to stop you there. You lot never learn. Look at what happened when you thought it would be a good idea to hold onto the Tesseract.” I told him. “You’re too late. The formula was destroyed.”
“What?! Why would you do that?” He demanded while taking a half step towards me.
“To stop people like you.” I shrugged. “I’m bored now so see yourself out” I told him while turning and walking towards the elevator.
“We still need you” Fury shouted after me.
“Oh I know, and when the call comes I will answer because contrary to what you all think, I actually care about the lives of the innocent people on this Earth. Just know that Rogers may be their Captain, but he will never be mine.”
“What does that mean?”
I waited until I was in the elevator before answering, “it means, he has no control over my actions. I do what I want.” Saying those freeing words felt good as I allowed myself to appreciate what they really meant. I was finally strong enough physically to never let Rogers push me around again. I never had to do anything that anyone told me to do again. I had freedom.
The closing doors stopped him from answering and I waited to be carried up to the penthouse. As the doors opened, I saw that the sun was bathing the whole living area in a golden light. Scanning my eyes over the room I spotted Bucky lying down on the sofa facing the elevator. From the rise and fall of his chest, he seemed to be asleep. Like a cat I silently slinked over to him and kneeled near his head.
Watching Bucky sleep was one of my favourite past-times because he never looked as peaceful as when he was sleeping. All the guilt and worry that usually etched his face evaporated the second he allowed himself to rest. He looked younger like this and like any regular twenty-something year old. A pang of sympathy went through me as I thought about everything that was taken from him. He never had the chance to be a normal good-looking young man. He should have the world at his feet. I could only imagine how hard it must have been growing up with the Great Depression and then fighting for your country only to be captured by Hydra and turned into their weapon.
I could feel myself spiralling, going down a path I really shouldn’t be going down, but I couldn’t help it. Bucky deserved freedom, he deserved a chance to be normal and with someone who was good for him. Someone who wasn’t me. I was a constant reminder of his old life, a casualty of the war he fought for 70 years and was only just starting to win. I thought having Extremis would change how I felt, it would make me feel worthy of him. It didn’t though. It made me feel stronger when it came to the Rogues but not Bucky. Maybe he would always be my Achilles.
I once told Rogers that everything special about him came out of a bottle, but didn’t that now apply to me? Extremis made me better than those traitors and I would forever be grateful for that, but it didn’t put me in the same league as Bucky. He was forced to do what he did, no one forced me to make those weapons.
“Stop staring at me.” Bucky suddenly huffed with his eyes still closed while burrowing further into the sofa.
“Who said I was staring?” I asked with a smile.
“My spy senses told me.”
“So, your spy senses told you it was me and not a killer?” I asked as one of my eyebrows raised in question.
“Nah, don’t need them for that. I always know when you’re near me.” He replied quietly, he opened his eyes and smiled before pulling me down for a quick kiss. “Plus, FRI told me you were coming up” he grinned when we pulled apart.
I laughed at his honesty and gave him another kiss before standing up again.
“What’s up? You have that face” Bucky asked.
“What face?”
“The ‘I’m having an internal battle but don’t want to tell anyone because I don’t want to look weak so will bottle it up’ face.”
“You can tell all of that from my face?” I asked in disbelief.
“Told ya’ – spy senses” he laughed.
“Well you need to get them checked out because I’m completely fine.” I lied.
Bucky looked at me like he didn’t believe a word I was saying but thankfully decided to not push it. “What did Fury want?”
“Want’s me to apologise to Steve for breaking his jaw and wants me to work with them again.”
“What do you want?”
“To break the other side of his jaw” I joked, and it earned a laugh from Bucky which made me feel slightly better about the situation.
“Are you going to join us?”
“Unfortunately,” I sighed, “besides, someone needs to watch your six o’clock” I winked before walking over to the kitchen area for coffee.
“I think you’re the one who need someone watching your six.”
“Ye because of Captain Perfect’s shit plans. It’s like he wants me injured.” I sighed as I watched my mug fill.
“So nothing to do with your ego and wanting to prove him wrong all of the time?” Bucky asked and I could tell from his tone that he was joking. Despite it being a joke, I had to force my laugh because his words were feeding the vampire inside that was sucking the life out of me.
“I plead the fifth” I said with a small smile.
“As much as I can’t stand them, it would be good having you with me.” He told me. “I would finally feel like I had someone I could trust.”
“Despite them not knowing about us?”
“Especially because they don’t know about us!” Bucky said. “If Steve knew about us, he would probably do something to you and then I would have to kill him.”
“Then I would be forced to break you out of prison,” I said with a smile.
“And I don’t think either of us could last on the run for too long, I’ve got used to having a sugar daddy,” he said, sealing the joke with a wink.
“Does that mean you’re gonna give me sugar?” I teased.
“Come over here, it’s waiting for you doll” he replied while gesturing to the front of his pants.
I couldn’t help but roll my eyes at him as a laugh escaped. “I have work to do, not all of us can lay around like trophy wives” I threw over my shoulder as I made my way out of the room.
“You love me being your trophy wife” I heard Bucky shout before the doors closed.