Work Text:
There’s a man. There’s a manthere’samanthere’sa-
I can’t move. My mouth is open- somehow- a scream stuck in my throat and there’ssomethingabovemewhoisthat-
My mind stops, restarts, every nerve ending frozen while my heart pumps a rapid tattoo on my chest.
The weight above me is solid and unmoving.
Someone- something is there, closer than normal, closer than I’m used to. I don’t understand. I try to move my fingers but even as they twitch I know it’s useless. Still I can’t help but fight it. It’s stupid. I should be used to this. Just another dream, another trick of the mind. It’s alright. My mind plays tricks on me all the time.
There’s a pressure right on my diaphragm, something heavy that’s making it hard for me to breathe. My body isn’t responding to me, frozen, and for a moment I can actually feel my brain trying to process why.
It’s okay.
Oh go-
You’re okay.
There’s a tall, tall creature standing above me. It looms like a shadow, back curved and pressing against the ceiling. A head is leaning, leaning down towards me.
I take a deep breath. It’s a dream, just a dream. Remember. Stay calm and make yourself move. Once you can move a leg or arm your brain will stop making things up for you to see.
Something pushes down my head, keeping me pinned.
You’re safe.
I try to ignore the feeling of ice against the curve of my ear. My fingers are definitely moving now.
You’re safe.
Liarliarliarliar-
I’m screaming for my legs to move, to turn away- anything. This feels worse than the others, different. Maybe it’s because the things in my head had never been so close before, always at the edge of my bed or even a few feet away. Time drags, the world slowing down with my panic and it makes it so much worse.
I just want to show you a few things.
My limbs unlock and the scream held inside my throat dies. My entire body hurts, pins and needles going up and down my arms and it feels like I’ve just dragged myself out after a long swim.
I sat awake until sunrise, trying to banish that voice in my head. That horrible, familiar voice promising to show me...
I shudder.
For a moment there, just before I forced myself awake...
I’d wanted to let myself listen to it.
