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For as long as he could remember, Nanase Riku has had the ability to see and speak with ghosts. Spending a lot of time in hospital meant he was never without at least one spectral visitor. Each visit left him feeling sad for the one who'd passed.
But, he never expected one of them to outright bring tears to his eyes until he met a boy about his age.
***
It had been a pretty bad attack, enough for an ambulance to have to whisk him to the hospital. He was going to pull through, the doctors assured, but he needed to spend a few days in the hospital, just to be safe.
He'd apologised to his unit-mates and manager, knowing their tour would have to be put on hiatus until he'd recovered. Everybody responded he wasn't at fault and had no reason to apologise.
Even Iori had smiled softly and told him that what mattered most was that he get some rest in order to recover, because once they were back on that stage, they would give one hell of a performance to make up for it.
Riku nodded and smiled widely.
***
He was alone in his room, just looking at the ceiling and thinking. Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted someone he didn't know. "Oh, I see I have a visitor?"
"Eh?! Oi, you mean you can see me?!" the ghost exclaimed.
Riku nodded as he slowly sat up and turned to face the visitor fully. Though the appearance was faint, he could make out blond hair held back on one side by red hair clips, a black hat, blue eyes and an outfit of pinks and blacks.
"Huh, never expected anyone would."
"How long ago?"
"Hmm, I think about ten minutes. So, you know I'm dead then?"
"Yeah. I don't know why, but I can communicate with ghosts. I was expecting a visitor eventually."
"Yeah...we don't know each other, right? Yet, for some reason I was drawn to this room. I guess this'll be before I'm going to follow my friends around for a while and make sure they move on."
"I'm Nanase Riku, Riku's fine."
"The center of IDOLiSH7, right?"
"Yeah."
"I'm Kurusu Syo."
"Wait, as in from STARISH?"
"Yep."
"So, how did you...?"
"My heart gave out on me. They tried to revive me, but I was declared D.O.A. I bet he's just about to find out the news."
"He?"
"Natsuki. We've known each other since we were kids."
"Shinomiya Natsuki?"
"Yeah. The guy'll be beside himself when he finds out. And Kaoru...oh god, I can't bear to think how he'll react..."
"Your brother?"
"Twin brother."
"Ahh, you're a twin too?"
"Older. You?"
"Younger."
"We always knew this day would come, but..."
He could see tears running down the spirit's cheeks.
"Fuck! I never wanted it to! We tried surgery and everything, but my heart just decided it was done! I didn't give it permission! Now Kaoru and Natsuki will be broken, the rest of STARISH will grieve, and Nanami...oh god, Nanami..."
"I'm sorry. I wish I could help you..."
He wiped his eyes as an idea struck. "You can. As a fellow idol, you can have a chance to speak with everyone on my behalf. Do you have a pen and paper? I want you to tell them exactly what I tell you. Can you do that, Riku?"
Riku nodded as he found the notebook and pen. "I'm ready when you are."
"Okay, here goes."
***
The next afternoon, Iori stopped by for a short visit. He noted the usually cheerful redhead appeared subdued. "Another visitor, Nanase-san?"
"Mm." He didn't care if Iori believed him or not, at least he was willing to listen. "Could I ask you to help out with something?"
"That depends on what the task is."
"I need you to ask if Manager can arrange for me to meet with the remaining members of STARISH."
"STARISH?"
"Mm. I was visited by one of them late yesterday afternoon."
"So, you've been asked to pass on final regards to each of them?"
"Yeah. And his brother Kaoru."
"How can you guarantee they'll heed your request?"
"Syo counted on the possibility of cynicism and told me what to say. He told me that Natsuki would understand."
"Alright, what is this word or phrase?"
"It's...manly but cute may be a contradiction but you've loved me all the same, Nacchan."
"That's...quite the phrase. Very well, I'll speak to Manager immediately upon my return. Now, how are you feeling?"
"Better. I didn't wheeze once last night and the doctors are impressed. I might be discharged tomorrow, though I still need to rest."
"Having to pass on final regards to complete strangers could be nerve-wracking. Would you like for me to come with you?"
"Eh?"
Iori averted his gaze. "You know, just to ensure you don't have another attack."
Riku smiled softly and nodded. "Actually, I was going to ask if you could. I was just surprised you'd offered first. After I'm done...would I be able to lend your back?"
Iori nodded.
***
The next day, Riku was discharged from hospital. Tsumugi approached him. "Nanase-san, I have managed to arrange for a meeting with the members of STARISH. There was cynicism at first, but that phrase helped confirm your honesty."
"Will his brother be there too?"
"Yes. Come on, I'll take you to where we arranged to meet."
"Where's Iori?"
"We'll pick him up on the way, he already informed me that his presence was requested."
"Thanks."
She smiled and nodded as she led him out to the van.
***
The group was gathered in a music hall. All wore solemn faces, some damp with fresh tears.
Riku approached them. "Erm, everyone, my name is Nanase Riku. I'm the one who'd requested for all of you to gather today."
A young woman approached him. "I'm Nanami Haruka. Nanase-san, thank you for coming."
"Is it true you're here to deliver Syo-chan's final words?" a blond who looked very similar to his spectral visitor asked.
"Yes. I wrote them down as he wanted me to express them exactly."
"Then, please begin." That came from a young man with dark blue hair. His voice was slightly choked.
"Alright." He opened the notebook. " Hey, everyone, it's me! Sorry about suddenly leaving you like this, I had hoped we'd all have more years together. But, my damn heart decided otherwise. It wasn't strain, so no, practice didn't cause this. My heart just...stopped. Anyway, there were things I wanted to say to each of you and have asked Nanase Riku here to deliver my final words to you. Good thing the guy can speak with ghosts. Kaoru, I wanna talk to you first." He looked to the small blond being held by a taller blond.
Kaoru lifted his head.
"You must be feeling incomplete now that I'm gone. I know you were doing everything you could to study how to help me. I'm sorry my body gave out before you had the chance to. Never blame yourself for not completing your studies in time, okay? I'm proud of you for coming as far as you have, and I don't want you to give it up. If you still want to be a doctor, then keep it up. You'll make a huge difference in many lives. I believe in you, bro. Please give my love to Mom and Dad. I love you."
Kaoru nodded. "I'll keep it up, Syo-chan..."
"And now for STARISH. First, Otoya."
The redhead perked up at the sound of his name.
Riku looked in his direction. "I'm glad we met. We shared a lot of interests, so you were a pretty cool guy to hang around with during our days as students at Saotome Gakuen. Don't let my death be the reason you cease to shine like the sun you are. STARISH is six again, so you may need to up the excitement in future lives. Can I count on you to do that?"
Otoya nodded tearfully. "It'll take a while, but I'll shine bright again, Syo. Promise."
"Next, Ren." Riku looked to see who he was supposed to direct the words to. He saw Otoya gesture to a tall blond. "Though I hated how you always called me Ochibi-chan, I gotta say I was also glad you were someone who wouldn't hold back on the teasing. Even after you found out about my condition, you didn't treat me like I was made of glass and I appreciated it. As the seemingly oldest member, you might feel a need to take care of everyone. Don't forget to take care of yourself too. Seriously, no getting self-destructive and no giving up on music. Keep going, got it? You'd better be listening, you bastard!" Riku cleared his throat. "Sorry, that's what Syo said."
Ren chuckled as a tear slipped from his eye. "I can believe that." He reached up to brush it away.
" Tokiya, you're next." He recognised the name and looked to the dark-haired boy from earlier. "We weren't exactly close, especially at school, but you were still a precious friend to me. Your singing voice was always incredible and I loved hearing it. You know, I was sometimes jealous of it. Take care of Otoya as well as yourself, please? It'd be appreciated."
Tokiya nodded, his eyes squeezed shut. He felt an arm around his shoulders and looked to see it belonged to Otoya. He leaned into the half-embrace as he lifted a hand to his face.
Otoya squeezed him.
"Masato, I've got some things to say to you now."
Masato looked up at Riku and nodded.
"While I told Ren not to feel obliged to take care of everyone as the seemingly oldest, I'm repeating the same to you as you were essentially our group mother. Don't deny it." He paused as quiet but sad chuckles sounded from some of the group. "Anyway, your mild manner and calm disposition made you a soothing person to be around. Honestly, just sitting with you was enough to ease me. You never teased me, but you never treated me like I could break any minute. So, thanks for that."
Masato silently nodded once more, not knowing how to respond. He closed his eyes, leaning against Ren, not stopping his own tears from falling.
"Alright, Cecil's next!"
Cecil finished wiping at his eyes for the third time since Riku had entered the hall. He set his green eyes upon the older boy.
"You drove me crazy when we first met, but I'm glad you stayed. Without you, we wouldn't have realised what was missing from STARISH. Sorry that I have to be the new missing piece. Can I ask you a big favour? Could you please look after Natsuki for me? Thanks."
Cecil nodded, wiping away more tears. "Of course I will." He could see Natsuki and Kaoru were comforting each other, so he stepped over to Haruka. "May I?"
She nodded and felt him wrap an arm around her shoulders.
Riku looked to Haruka. "Nanami...I don't know where to begin. You were always a supportive person to all of us, it's no surprise we all grew to care about you so much. It's because of you that STARISH exists in the first place. That's something I doubt any of us would forget. Thanks for everything you've done to support and watch over us, Nanami. Sorry I was too much of a coward to say this while I was alive, but...I love you."
Haruka's fresh tears spilled over as she cupped her hands over her mouth. If Cecil wasn't holding her up, she would've fallen onto her knees.
"Finally...Natsuki." Riku looked to the silently sobbing bespectacled blond who was holding Kaoru. "God, I just...I know this always frightened you from the first time you saw me collapse when we were kids, so I can only guess how badly you reacted upon receiving the news. Ever since we were kids, you drove me crazy - always chasing me around with a freaking butterfly net, trying to force me into cutesy outfits and all of that! But, you did more than that. Your ever-present smile was contagious when necessary, you helped lift my spirits after a particularly rough concours just by approaching me, smiling widely and offering your hand as a gesture of goodwill. Don't lose your smile. Don't break because of me, because I sure as hell won't be able to handle it if I was responsible for you completely breaking. As much as you drove me nuts, you were my best friend and main support through all of my ventures. You never once doubted if I could do anything, you encouraged me to try if I doubted myself. Thanks, Natsuki. Though not the same way I said it to Nanami, I want you to know that I do love you. "
The sobs came harder. "I...I l-love you t-too, S-Syo-chan..."
Riku closed the notebook, he'd finished delivering the final messages. He saw Syo standing nearby.
Tears ran down his cheeks as he regarded everyone he loved weeping. He looked over to Riku. "Thank you. They all needed to hear that. I'm sorry I'd had to put you through this."
Riku shook his head. "No. If I died sooner than expected, I'd want someone to do the same."
"I'll keep watching over them until I know they'll be okay." He approached his brother and best friend, kneeling down and hugging both of them.
"Mm." He raised his voice. "Everyone, I'll...I'll leave you to mourn now."
"Nanase, thank you for telling us what Kurusu had to say," Masato replied, he was the only one who could.
Riku nodded before he left the group.
***
Iori was waiting outside. He heard footsteps approaching.
"Iori, can I still lend your back?"
"Of course, Nanase-san."
Riku wrapped his arms around Iori's waist and buried his face into his shoulder.
Iori felt Riku tremble before he heard him sob. He rested a hand atop Riku's, reaching the other to rest atop Riku's head. Just this once in public, since Nanase-san needs it.
***
It took ten minutes, but Riku had finally calmed down. He stepped away from Iori and wiped his eyes.
Iori turned around, offering a handkerchief. "I told Manager to go on ahead, so we'll find our own way back. I figured you might still want a bit more time before seeing everyone else. The hotel isn't more than two blocks from here, so it shouldn't cause you any strain."
"Mm. Thanks." He accepted the handkerchief, using it to wipe his eyes and lightly blow his nose. "That was awful, but...it had to be done."
"Come on, Nanase-san." He offered his hand. "Let's go home."
Riku nodded. He took out his face mask and strapped it on, then took Iori's hand, their fingers interlaced with each other's.
"Was it as daunting as you'd feared?"
"No. The worst part was trying to keep myself from getting emotional while seeing everyone cry. He's very much loved by those I had to see today. He was there too, crying because they were."
"Ghosts can cry?"
"It's not the same as when the living do, but what runs down their cheeks can still be called tears."
"Why did you agree to do this if you knew it would be upsetting?"
"Because...I know that someday, I'm gonna die too. My condition..."
He tightened his grip. "Don't." He hated thinking about the day Riku's condition would take him away from the group...from him.
"When that day comes, I don't know if I'll be able to find someone to tell all of you everything I want to. Sure, I can say some of it in the here and now. But, there are some things that only apply at the time, you know? As I told Syo, I'd want for all of you to hear what I have to say too."
"You're too kind, Nanase-san, that's your problem."
He pouted. "Geez, Iori..."
"But, it's a good thing to be kind. I'm only sorry it brought you sorrow."
"A small price to pay to bring others closure."
"Was it really worth it in the end?"
Riku thought about it. Though everyone was crying when he departed, he could see some of them also exuded a sense of peace at knowing what Syo had wanted to tell them. "Yeah, it was."
"Then that's what matters."