Archive of Our Own

-- ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG]! --

EB: dave?
EB: dave i know you're online! don't ignore me.
EB: dave...
TG: woah shit sorry man i was just
TG: busy
TG: yeah sorry
TG: whats up
EB: dave, that's such a lame excuse. you weren't busy for like... 23 minutes!
TG: you counted
TG: why
TG: nevermind im not gonna question it
TG: what did you want egbert
EB: i just wanted to talk to you! i don't see literally anything wrong with just wanting to message my favorite bro in the entire universe, dave.
TG: you want something from me
TG: spill it what the hell is it
TG: if youre going to ask me to fly back up to washington again i told you man i cant make it until like
TG: this summer
TG: so you have to wait a few months
EB: no, no! it's not that! though, that... sounds really nice.
EB: you coming up this summer, i mean.
TG: aha so you did want something from me
EB: shut up, dave!
EB: okay, so i'm not going to ask anything of you, because that's dumb. i'm just going to.
EB: let the fact slip.
EB: that i.
TG: what
EB: shush! let me speak.
EB: as i was saying.
EB: i drank a lot of apple juice today, dave.
TG: ok
EB: do you know what that means?
TG: enlighten me
EB: it means i have to pee really, really, badly.
EB: how does that make you feel?
TG: depressed
EB: really, dave? come on.
EB: give me the reply you know you want to give me.
EB: :B
TG: okay well
TG: in that case
TG: im kind of regretting not asking you to do this the last time i was up there with you
TG: but thats besides the point
TG: this is some weird kinky plan of yours isnt it
TG: who the fuck tells their best bro that they gotta pee really badly like that
TG: all seductive like
TG: not many people egbert
EB: don't make me shush you again!
EB: you're rambling.
EB: the point is.
EB: i really have to pee and i've been holding it for...
EB: a while? i think?
EB: like, at least until this morning.
EB: and it's evening now and my legs are shaking and i'm having a really hard time not whimpering your name.
EB: dave...
EB: like that.
EB: no wait.
EB: a-ah, d-dave...~!
EB: like that!
TG: jesus fucking christ dude thats
TG: thats
TG: really bad
TG: really hot but really bad
TG: surprised daddy egbert isnt on your ass telling you to take a piss already
TG: hard not to notice a loud as fuck horny teenager like you walking around the house in your state
TG: oh whats wrong son
TG: nothing dad im just holding my pee because i want my boyfriend to cyber me so i can imagine im pissing all over his majestic body
EB: i love it when you talk dirty.
TG: shut the fuck up and take your pants off already
EB: oh, demanding, aren't you? i'm so flattered, dave. thank you for being so rough with me.
EB: i can't wait to piss all over you as payback.
TG: payback what payback im getting you off
TG: goddammit anyway
TG: how badly do you have to pee
TG: like 1-10
EB: 7
EB: no wait. 8.
EB: i took another sip of juice.
TG: hot
TG: keep at that
TG: gotta get the fucking egtrain up to a solid 11 before i work my strider charm on him
EB: i'm swooning.
TG: damn right you are
TG: close your eyes for a second and imagine me with you
TG: and then imagine me sliding off your ugly boxers that youre probably wearing
TG: and then imagine me leaving you in that room for like a half an hour while i go grab a snack or some shit because i love seeing you in pain at the fault of none other than dave fucking strider
TG: no fingering for now
TG: fuck no
TG: i go get some goddamn cheetos and wait this shit out while you drown yourself in piss liquid and cry out my name like you love to
TG: lock your door by the way your dads gonna come in all like hey son whats up
TG: oh nothing dad just cybering my boyfriend im gonna piss all the fuck over him
TG: okay son that sounds great see you later
TG: that wont happen like that your dads gonna probably kinkshame you highkey john
TG: so lock your door
TG: john where are you
TG: john
EB: oh, sorry dave! i just came literally everywhere imagining you voring in between my legs.
EB: also, i drank more apple juice.
EB: three more boxes i think.
EB: you ramble for a long time, dave.
TG: fucker
TG: dont use the word vore right now thats so gross john
TG: i dont wanna vore you i wanna watch you squirm and piss all over me
EB: that's fair.
EB: you told me to take my pants off. are yours off?
TG: idk maybe whats it to you
TG: does it really matter
EB: yes! you can't jack off as easily if they're on.
EB: wait
EB: fuck
TG: whats up
EB: 9
TG: 9 what
TG: wait
TG: oh
TG: fuck thats hot
EB: no it's painful dave!
EB: i really need to pee, fuck.
EB: fuck.
EB: fuck.
EB: fuck.
TG: hold it for longer
TG: are you touching yourself
EB: kind of? i'm like almost touching my clit but whenever i do i kind of like... squirm more and it's not helping my really full bladder.
EB: it's so painful but i really need to get off! i really need to pee too and the piss in me is only making me more turned on so something has to happen or else i'll explode.
TG: woah no inflation here egbert lets keep this pg-13
EB: i've said fuck like 40 times already. dave we're literally having sex.
TG: i guess
TG: sit on my face
EB: what what?
EB: oh.
EB: okay. i'm crawling over your oddly scrawny body and you're smirking underneath me and i kiss that smirk right off of you because you're a fucking smart ass.
EB: i still have my shirt on, though.
EB: do you want it off?
TG: why the fuck not
TG: i take your shirt off all gentlemanlike and flick your nipple like a gentleman and then you finally get the hell on my face
TG: goddamn egbert youre hot as shit
TG: like not looks wise youre like
TG: burning
TG: in between your legs i mean
TG: not that you arent hot but like
TG: yeah
EB: don't worry, dave, i know exactly what you mean.
EB: god i can barely type.
EB: this is really hard.
TG: gimme a number
EB: 11
TG: fuck
TG: my massive boner is killing me
EB: okay and my bladder is killing me but you don't see me complaining!
TG: first of all you are and have been this entire time second of all youre getting off to this so theres no use complaining
EB: shut up.
EB: anyway, i'm on your face and you're brushing your lips over me and i'm moaning your name.
EB: dave, dave... you're so hot underneath me like this.
EB: you'd be even hotter if i wasn't looking at you from such a weird angle.
TG: i need more masturbation material describe some more shit so i can cum all over my computer
EB: geeze, dave, i'm trying! it's hard when i can't stop shaking like this.
EB: especially... my legs. they're shaking so much.
EB: it's hard to catch my breath when i'm so focused on keeping all this hot piss inside of me. it's painful but it's making me feel so good.
EB: but then you start to lick at my clit and i just lose myself and i grind myself into you even though it's making my stomach hurt even more.
EB: fuck, dave. fuck
EB: fuck
EB: fuck im gonna
EB: there's hot piss streaming down your face and a lot of it landed in your mouth and that's really hot.
EB: i still have more.
EB: dave i'm still aching there's more piss inside of me answer me please i'm going to die
TG: sorry just nursing this massive boner
TG: give me a second to reread what you just wrote like
TG: 30 times
TG: because im horny as all shit at this point
TG: id tell you to send nudes but youre probably covered in piss at this point
EB: don't break the fantasy!!!!!!!!
TG: sorry bro
TG: anyway theres piss all over my face and youre staring down at me like the cocky fuck you are
TG: and im fucking all up in there slurping that piss up because mm tasty piss nothing better than the taste of egbert in the afternoon
TG: youre still so wet
TG: not just piss all your weird vagina excretion is there too and im slurping all that up too
TG: fucking tasty
EB: have you ever eaten out a vagina in your entire life?
TG: dont break the fantasy hypocritebert uwu
EB: you ass.
EB: you're really good at this. you're making me feel so good, dave.
EB: i'm grinding on your face again because i'm soaking at this point and i really need something more than just your tongue.
EB: and then i piss on you again. this time you have your face full of john, though, so it's all getting on your face.
EB: which is really hot.
EB: why can't i stop pissing. how much fucking juice did i drink today.
TG: enough for me to want to drink it all up
TG: youre so fucking sexy john
EB: why are you typing so slow?
TG: theres a hand being used on my dick im so fucking sorry that im so turned on right now john
TG: its your fault you shouldnt be complaining
EB: i'm not! geeze.
EB: hey dave?
TG: yeah
EB: i'm gonna lick that shit off your face.
EB: i slide down a little, eyeing you and moving in and kissing you and all i taste is a whole lot of piss.
EB: you taste better than i do.
TG: bullshit
EB: you taste so good, dave. your lips mixed with my gross pee taste so good!
EB: i'm having a hard time trying to settle myself down. every time i try to get comfy your dick gets in the way!
TG: gee really
EB: yeah! it's really annoying. do you mind if i sit on it?
EB: just because of how in the way it is.
TG: go ahead
EB: great!
EB: i bite my lip as i slide downward a bit. i'm such a wreck right now, all flushed and everything. i can't help but moan your name as i slip onto your dick, a smirk on my face.
EB: how do i look, dave? on top of you like this?
EB: you're still covered in piss, by the way.
EB: it's really gross.
EB: dave?
EB: sigh. it's not easy to type with three fingers shoved up inside of me either, you know!
TG: woah
TG: 3
TG: thats hot
EB: asshole.
EB: give me a break, for once. if your once word replies mean anything, it's that you're already close to orgasming and i've barely gotten any time to do something to myself!
TG: one word replies my ass the last like 3 were two words or more
EB: they were still really short, dave!
TG: yeah yeah okay
TG: anyway
TG: youre sitting on my dick and im fucking moaning my ass off even though your shitty excuse to get all up on me was so goddamn corny
TG: jesus fuck man
TG: youre really tight
TG: youre bouncing up and down and its really hot even though i still cant fully feel my face because its covered in egbert pee
TG: i thrust up into you and you moan my name and fuck its hot and fuck i want more so i give you more and speed up and
TG: god
TG: john im gonna cum
TG: jesus fuck
TG: john you ass tell me to cum
EB: oh, cum for me, davey~!
TG: im upset that you saying that made me cum
TG: @my body that should be an instant boner killer
TG: how are you doing
EB: you're really good at getting me off. just looking at your red text got me all hot and bothered.
EB: i'm covered in my own cum and gross piss, dave.
EB: what have i done?
TG: just had the best cybersex youll ever have in your goddamn life
TG: was it worth it
EB: ...
EB: maybe.
TG: maybe my ass
TG: i gotta go now though dirk needs me
EB: aw, okay.
EB: bye, dave!
EB: wait. before you go.
EB: um. did you like this?
EB: like... i don't know. did you?
TG: more than youll ever know egbert
TG: pester you later
TG: peace