Chapter Text
The first night Ben wakes up, in almost six months, without a nightmare in the middle of the night feels like it should have arrived with more fanfare. With a celebration, maybe, no matter how small it is. No matter if it was expected or not, the day feels like it should have come with a little more fanfare, or at least a little more expectation.
Instead, Ben wakes up with approximately zero fanfare. In his own bed, in his own boxers, as Rey stares at him with wide eyes and her phone in her hand. As sunlight streams into his bedroom, and he wonders what fucking time it is while she sits cross legged on her side of the mattress and she quietly blinks down at him.
“Twelve hours.” Rey whispers, almost sounding reverent as Ben blinks at her in confusion. “You slept twelve hours, Ben.”
He stares, still beyond confused on what she’s talking about, until her voice quietly hitches and she blinks back tears.
He slept twelve hours.
That’s- that might be a record since he was a surly teenager with too much anxiety in his system. That’s huge-
He didn’t have a nightmare.
Ben didn’t have a nightmare.
He’s free.
He starts having it come together as he stares at Rey's face, and he watches the moment she realizes that he’s got it.
“Twelve hours?” He croaks, slowly starting to grin and awaken as Rey clutches her phone between white knuckles. “Are you sure?”
She nods, her eyes welling up with tears as he sighs. Jesus.
He gently grabs at her shirt, until she’s clutching onto his chest and crying. Until she’s wrapping her arms around him, her breath coming out in little staccato noises as he sighs, and rolls on his back for her.
He holds her, as she shakes and laughs and cries in his arms.
So, fanfare it is, then. His own little cheerleading team, Rey, will bring the damn fanfare.
“I’m so proud of you. Is that stupid? Ben, I’m so fucking proud of you-“
He nods, as she sobs and shudders against his, admittedly weak, grasp. It’s a little silly, because it is just sleep. It shouldn’t be a special occasion, because it never should have had to have been an occasion in the first place, but it is anyways.
Rey takes a deep breath, burying her face in his shoulder as Ben just works on waking up while she laughs again. She pulls away, sitting on his stomach as she rubs her eyes and any subsequent tears away.
Ben just blinks, letting his eyes adjust to the light as he lets out a big exhale from his chest
“Twelve hours, Ben. I-I woke up at seven, and I realized neither of us had woken up in the middle of the night, so I- I don’t know. I emailed the library for you, said you needed to take a sick day, because I just couldn’t wake you up and I- I also emailed my professors, so I have the day off, but you need to decide if you want to go to that afternoon class of yours or not but I just couldn’t wake you up-“
He stares at her, listening as she shifts her weight and rambles. He watches as she nervously picks up the edge of his blanket, and she starts playing with the seam as she shrugs.
“I’ve just been staring at you for almost four hours because I couldn’t believe that you were still asleep-“
He blinks, as she huffs and stops mid sentence. Her cheeks puffed out, like she’s physically holding the unsaid words in her mouth.
She just stares at him, as he rubs his eyes and stretches. As he takes a deep breath, and shuts them again for a moment to try and gather himself.
“Sorry I left you alone for so long, then.” He finds the energy to joke, as Rey grins and stares down at him.
She bats at his shoulder before pulling the blanket off of him, just far enough for her to slip under the covers and press herself along his side. Just far enough to lie next to him, slipping a knee over his, and for her to run a hand through his hair as he breathes out and allows her to have complete freedom with his body.
She runs a hand over his chest, as his head swims a little.
“I’m so proud, Ben.” She hums, leaning forward and kissing his temple as he sighs. “Ben, seriously, thank you for walking up to me that first night. For making sure I was okay. Thank you. I don’t ever think I properly told you that, I don’t think I ever properly said thank you-”
He nods, taking a deep breath as Rey blinks down at him. He sleepily returns her grin, as she sighs and takes in a deep breath that is clearly meant to keep the tears at bay.
Her eyes go glassy, and he tries to stop his from doing the same. Because if she starts crying, he’s going to start crying too.
He grabs her arm, and squeezes her tight enough just to let her know that he’s there, he sees her, he understands.
“Thank you.” Is all he’s able to mutter, as she adjusts her body to properly hang over his. He sucks in a breath while he shakes, and the tears finally come. “Rey, thank you. I don’t- thank you. I don’t know what I would do without you, sweetheart. I don’t know what I would be if you hadn’t crow-barred your way into my stupid, sad life.”
She just tells him to shut up, before she collapses on his chest as he laughs. His life isn’t stupid, or sad.
At least not anymore.
He mouths it against her neck, one more time, just to make sure she understands.
“Rey, thank you.”