Chapter Text
Dear Papa,
Our new potions master is named ‘Horace Slughorn’, and he says he came back because Regulus personally asked him to.
I won felix felicis off of him in our first class by using some of the tips you gave me. Hermione made me promise to share all your notes going forward. Have you ever thought about writing a textbook?
I’ll send a longer letter tomorrow but I thought you would want to know right away.
Love,
Neville.
--
Nothing could have made Severus more seethingly furious than to know that Horace Slughorn had returned to teach potions. In fact, it made him so angry that he demanded Dumbledore allow him to cart himself over to Hogwarts twice a week to teach a series of mixed-age voluntary potions classes. As the stores in Diagon were boarded-up one by one, the vibrant life of the castle was a pleasant change. He didn’t grade, but he did do more or less everything else one would expect from a professor, with pleasure. Harry, Neville and Ron were all in his mixed 6-7 class, while in the 4-5 mix he had acquired Marley, Ginny, and their new friend Luna. Jenny, who was top of her year, did not take a spot in the 2-3 class.
As Severus spent his time offering what he could to the students and watching the population of Diagon Alley drain away, Regulus was distant and odd. He’d taken Sirius’s position as defense professor, a truly baffling hiring choice on Dumbledore’s part. Part of the oddness, they all knew, was about Barty Crouch. Since his escape from Azkaban, Regulus had never been quite the same. Now that the war was resuming in earnest, the guilt and grief had become more visceral than ever.
The rest of the Marauders had shifted their positions as well. After Lucius Malfoy’s arrest – he’d left Hogwarts grounds shortly after the children to join Voldemort at the ministry – the Hogwarts Board of Governors had not sent another representative back to the school, and Sirius had, save for his participation in the Wizengamot, became a full-time member of the Order of the Phoenix, along with Remus and James. They worked alongside the aurors, for the most part, plotting defenses, responding to death eater action against muggleborns and their families.
Where Severus found a flash of hope and life in Hogwarts, James, Sirius and Remus found it elsewhere. It was revealed that after his fourth year, Neville had given his tournament prize money to Fred and George Weasley to start their prank shop. Even as adults, the Marauders found great joy in helping their younger counterparts in developing their ideas. Even Severus contributed a little, and it was a blessed relief to laugh with his friends and his husband as he thought up mixtures of magical face-paints and nail polishes and hair dyes.
For Lily and Kingsley, there was no such relief; the encroaching war bought encroaching doom. The knowledge that war would soon consume all of them brought much of the justice system, particularly the petty charges she and Kingsley usually dealt with, to a screeching halt. It wasn’t much of a surprise when, in the wake of the murder of Amelia Bones, Kingsley left private practice to work with Mad-Eye Moody running the DMLE. As for Lily, well, she did what she could. There was still plenty of magical law that needed doing, tenants with landlords and divorces that were happening and custody to be fought for. Bad laws that needed to be challenged. But she was fighting a ceaseless, losing battle, and they all knew it. In December, just before Christmas, she closed her office for the last time and moved to join Kingsley’s new Internal Affairs Taskforce.
--
That year, they celebrated Christmas at the Burrow, and they had a Christmas wedding too. It wasn’t a lawful affair; they recognized that, if things went badly in the war, being married might endanger everyone involved. But that didn’t stop them from wanting their feelings recognized. So, Vera and Kingsley said their vows in Mrs. Weasley’s back garden, in the snow, with Lily as their un-official officiant. They didn’t really have wedding parties, as such, or much of a party at all. They promised to do it again, properly and with Vera’s friends present, when the war was over. Mrs. Weasley spent the entire wedding giving her older children – just Bill and Charlie, that was, now – pointed looks. Charlie gleefully ignored them, but Bill passed them on in the form of staring wistfully at Fleur Delacour.
Their reception was really just the Christmas dinner, and everything went well until the minister arrived, with Percy Weasley in tow, to wreak havoc. While James went to loom over Neville’s shoulder at the Minister, Severus found himself sitting with Marley alone near the top of the long, precarious staircase.
It was an opportunity to ask the question he’d been wondering all afternoon. “Do you know why Hermione didn’t come for Christmas?”
Severus had always gotten the distinct impression that she wasn’t especially close with her family, although he’d been careful to keep a watch for any signs of abuse. She certainly spent an odd amount of time with both the Weasleys and the Potters. In fact, last Christmas she’d dropped everything to return to them after she’d heard about Arthur’s injuries.
Marley chuckled, in the back of her throat, and shook her head a little. “Her and Ron have been fighting. By which I mean: he’s dating someone to spite her, and it’s working.”
Severus did not miss being sixteen. Not at all. “I’m glad none of you ever have this sort of drama.”
Marley laughed so hard she almost tumbled down the stairs before explaining the Harry-Cho debacle that happened over the last two years, including a first date that had culminated in crying about trauma and co-founding the Defense Association. There had not been a second date, but they had worked hard on the club together.
“He left that part out when he told us about founding the club.”
“Absolutely typical.”
--
HOGWARTS DEFENCE ASSOCIATION PLANNING MEETING
JANUARY 14, 1997
PRESENT:
President: H. Potter
Vice-President: G. M. Weasley
Events Coordinator: M. Potter
Secretary: H. Granger
Treasurer: H. Granger
Interhouse Outreach Coordinators: S. Bones, L. Lovegood & J. S. Potter
Academic Supervisor: Prof. R. Black
--
Dear Papa,
When you warned me about Horace Slughorn, I didn’t think you meant he might poison my friends! I’m just glad you always drilled potions safety into our heads the way you did. I had a bezoar in my hand almost immediately.
It is weird that he had a bottle of poisoned wine, isn’t it? Who would try and poison Slughorn?
Neville is acting weird. Either he just feels guilty about the way he accidentally contributed to Ron’s poisoning by leaving those chocolates on his windowsill, or he knows something we don’t. Given these lessons with Dumbledore… I don’t know, he seems different. I’ve talked to Jenny and Marley and we’re all going to try and keep an eye on it, but I just wanted to let you know.
Love,
Harry
--
Dear Mum, Dad, Papa,
Harry is out of the hospital wing now. I never thought I would feel so bad crushing him in a Quidditch game, but honestly between that asshole McLaggen, and having to quit because of the dementors third-year, and the bone-vanishing incident in Second Year, I’m starting to think he might have some kind of obscure Quidditch-related curse. Maybe Bill Weasley would take a look at it for us?
Love,
Marls
--
Jenny came to him while Severus was packing up from his last lesson of the day, wearing a distinctly odd expression. Severus shut the door and cast some of his most tried and true anti-eavesdropping spells. He knew from personal experience exactly what students could be like.
Jenny perched herself on Severus’s desk and watched him pack up his potions kit.
“I just had a really strange interaction with Draco Malfoy.” His gaze snapped up and she shook her head. “Not dangerous weird. He just cried a lot.”
Aside from the time Harry and Draco had almost gotten into a fight when Lucius had left the diary in Harry’s school supplies, Severus didn’t think he’d ever actually met Draco Malfoy. He hadn’t deigned to join Severus’s potions lessons, certainly.
“What happened?”
“He has the dark mark.” She said it bluntly. Of course, as a Slytherin, it was a reality of her life that many of the people she was meant to be close with did. “Harry’s been trying to stalk him all year. Marley and I have been… cooperating, I guess. Anyways, I followed him and he was crying and I think he was going to try and fight whoever it was until he saw it was me. Then he asked me what it was like not to be the person my parents wanted me to be.”
“Excuse me?” Severus was going to kill that young deatheater.
“I think he meant a Slytherin. It’s not like he knows me at all, really, other than that he remembers I’m Neville and Harry’s sister. Anyways, I told him there wasn’t one person my parents wanted me to be. And he said that was strange, for a pureblood, and I said that it shouldn’t be, and he left, and that was it. But I just… I think about the stories Uncle Sirius told us, about his parents, and I wonder if Harry’s reading the situation wrong. Maybe Malfoy’s a little deatheater twerp because he doesn’t have anything else to be.”
Severus had little and less compassion for a boy who could very well have been complicit in getting Harry possessed by Voldemort, but Jenny searched for good in her fellow Slytherins where she could find it. “What are you going to do?”
She shrugged. “Tell Harry to back off, probably. We’ve been indulging him for too long as it is. And tell Uncle Reg about what’s going on. He’s our head of house, and he’s Draco’s cousin. He might be able to help.”
A sensible plan. Better than anything Harry or Marley had ever come up with when left to their own devices. “Good idea, Jenny. And if it ever does come down to it, remember that you don’t owe Malfoy anything, but any help you want to offer him… we have your back.”
Jenny gave him a brief but fierce hug, and went back to her classmates and her life.
--
Dear Mum, Dad, Papa,
Ron and Hermione are dating now. They thought we wouldn’t notice but we did. Harry… I’m still not exactly sure what’s going on with Harry. He still hasn’t really left off Malfoy, but also him and Ginny were snogging at the victory party for the Quidditch Cup. Neville isn’t dating anyone, which I think demonstrates good taste. I don’t think I would stoop to dating any of these weirdos.
Love,
Marls
--
At first, when the patronus comes bounding through the dining room wall, Severus thought James had developed the most unnecessary over-use of magic to ask him to do the dishes. Instead, it was Harry’s voice that came from the stag, and he was fiercely glad Remus had taken the opportunity to teach him that trick over Christmas.
“Neville and Dumbledore have left the building. The map has deatheaters appearing out of the Room of Requirement.”
Severus’s ability to get into Hogwarts via floo powder operated because the floo network would be manually opened by someone else, usually Regulus, on the other side. Tossing down a fistful, he called, “Regulus Black’s Office!” but nothing happened. Lily, who must have heard Harry’s words from her home-office, cleared her throat lightly. “The fastest way in will be to apparate to the gates. You can get us in with your professorial credentials.”
The order guard on the gates, whoever it had been, seemed to have abandoned their post. Fortunately, Severus was able to pass through the magic anyways, and let Lily and James through as well. From there, Lily shifted into her animagus form and launched herself up towards the castle, towards where the dark mark hung overhead. James too could move faster in his animagus form, and he let Severus shift to climb upon his back as he had when they were children themselves.
They came upon Marley in the entryway, standing together with Susan Bones. Both girls had their wands drawn, and looked scared. Marley relaxed when she recognized her fathers, and laid a hand on Susan’s wrist to stop her from pointing her wand at them.
“Report,” James said after they shifted back, without much of his usual humour.
Marley, equally grim, explained, “Harry’s stalking of Malfoy finally payed off. Turns out he figured out some sort of plot to sneak deatheaters into the castle. He had a feeling that today while Neville and Dumbledore were gone was going to be bad, so we called up the DA to do patrols.”
Brave. But very, very stupid.
“And the rest of the student body?”
“Safe in their common rooms, hopefully.”
James was halfway through asking, “and you aren’t because?” When the doors burst open to reveal Bellatrix and Rudolphus Lestrange, and then there was a great amount of duelling and not a lot of talking before Regulus arrived.
It was such a plain relief to see him, but far less of a relief when he said to the Lestranges, “we have to go, now,” and fired off a jinx that just narrowly missed Marley as she ducked.
And then came Lily, in hot pursuit, wand drawn and face wet with tears, and Regulus and the Lestranges ran, fleeing out towards the forest, and Lily chased them all the way. Severus would have joined her, but instead, gritting his teeth, he took Marley and Susan back to their common room and stayed outside it, protecting the children, until Kingsley came to tell him the battle was over. They walked to the infirmary together.
Everyone seemed to be there. Lily was nursing a cut on her arm from a spell Severus himself had invented. James had his wand out already, murmuring the counter-curse over it, but still Severus hated the pain he had caused her. Lily, seeing him, raised her other hand to beckon him closer, and Severus walked past Bill Weasley, lying in bed surrounded by his family and fiancée, and, for some reason, Remus, past Tonks and Kingsley, who began arguing in hushed tones while she held a bloody cloth to her head, past Sirius, curled on the ground as Padfoot, and up to his wife and husband.
He almost tripped over Neville, who was sitting on the ground against Lily’s bed with his head in his hands.
“What happened?” He meant to ask Lily, but it was Neville who answered,
“Dumbledore took me out of the castle… to show me something, something about how to defeat Voldemort. But when we came back, we saw the dark mark over the tower. We flew back, but I was slow, and he was weak, and when we arrived, Regulus and Malfoy were waiting for us. Malfoy disarmed him, and Regulus cast Petrificus Totalus on me, and I couldn’t move, and I could hear them talking about how Malfoy had been tasked with killing Dumbledore, and Dumbledore asked him if it was because his father is in Azkaban, and asked why he hadn’t accepted Jenny’s offer to protect him, and Regulus said it was taking too long and he–”
Neville cut himself off, choking on his words, and from across the room, Severus could hear Molly, Fleur and Remus all yelling about something.
Lily said, “that was when I arrived on the tower. I saw him kill Dumbledore, and I changed back. Malfoy wasn’t expecting it so I stunned him and Regulus ran. That was when we ran into you.”
“And Malfoy?”
Neville said, “Mum cast the counter on me, so I got up around when he did and we fought down to the Room of Requirement. That was how he got them all into the castle. He ran back inside and escaped.”
James, finished with Lily’s arm, knelt down to put his arm around Neville. Lily leaned over and kissed Severus. It was a quiet reassurance that they were both alive.
--
Regulus Arcturus Black,
What I don’t understand is why you did it. When did you join their side? You were loyal during the first war, weren’t you? You must have been, to have been our secret keeper. Only, you brought Barty in, didn’t you? Did you sacrifice Frank and Alice to him? Did you do it on purpose?
Dumbledore told me once that he had, a very long time ago, had the misfortune to fall in love with the wrong person. I don’t believe he ever told anyone else that. But that day, just before we went and joined the war, he chose to tell me. I don’t know why he did that. I hate more than anything in the world that he died feeling betrayed, like he’d trusted the wrong person again. He wasn’t always a good person. Often, he was foolish. But he trusted you implicitly. You knew he did.
Did you tell Quirrell how to get the Philosopher’s stone, how to pass your riddle? Did you take the cloak and watch my children walk into his presence, where they could have been killed? Did you know that Harry was being possessed? Did you know about Crouch? Did you ‘forget’ Remus’s wolfsbane on purpose? Did you know about Pettigrew? Where did you go during the Triwizard Tournament? Were you standing in robes in that cemetery while they tortured my son? Did you tell Voldemort about the prophecy? Did you help him plant the compulsion to go to the ministry in Neville’s mind?
Or did you just see the opportunity when Jenny told you about Draco being a deatheater, and choose to take it?
Rot in hell, you treacherous bastard. May I live to piss on your grave,
Severus Snape
P.S. I hope you know that you broke Sirius’s heart, too.
--
After Dumbledore’s funeral, Severus and Sirius walked around the grounds, until they were standing just out of reach of the whomping willow. In all that time, neither of them said much, but when they stood and watched the tree extend feelers towards them, just narrowly missing each time, there was so much to be said.
“You did love him,” Sirius said, “like I did.”
He loved all the Marauders, but Regulus was special. Regulus had been his best man, while Sirius had been James’s, and Remus had been Lily’s. Severus was the one who had found Regulus on the day he went missing, who had brought him to stay with Lily’s parents.
It was a good thing they were dead. That they didn’t have to know that their kindness had been repaid with hatred and bigotry.
“Yes.”
They turned away from the willow. On the other side of the lake, he could see Neville walking with Harry, Hermione, and Ron. He was holding something metal in his hand, the light reflecting off it as it twisted in his fingers.
“He wasn’t always like this, was he? Something changed.”
“He was never the same after Barty betrayed us. You know that as well as anyone.”
It was true, but in those first few years, there’d never been any doubt, certainly not of his love for Sirius. “He loved you. I know he did.”
“Didn’t matter in the end, did it.”
No, in the end, it hadn’t.
--
That summer, there were battles and skirmishes all over Wizarding Britain. To Severus’s relief, his children participated in none of them. He fought in two, both draws where no one was killed, one just outside Hogsmede and the other, bafflingly, in rural, muggle, Wales. Lily stayed with the ministry, still investigating internal corruption, but imperiused officials seemed to be appearing faster than she could identify them. Kingsley stayed as well, doing all he could. Vera packed her bags and went to Canada. She and Kingsley both understood that sometimes, one had to choose the battles they could win. Sirius was held hostage by the Wizengamot, which struggled not to fold under the chaos that surrounded it. Dumbledore had left a great moral hole in the core of wizarding governance.
James and Severus both fought in the war as they waited for the Hogwarts term to resume. With McGonagall to become the new Headmistress, James would be taking her post as Transfiguration Professor, while Severus was planning to wrench potions from Slughorn’s grubby hands if it killed him. Remus, conversely, fought with no expectation of a return to normal life. Severus was only glad that Dumbledore was dead and couldn’t talk him into going undercover with the werewolves, as he had in the last war. This time, he only fought as a normal Wizard would have been asked, and he had a partner in crime, Tonks, who he got on with like a house on fire.
--
Harry and Neville turned 17 back to back, on the 30th and 31st of July, and on the 31st shared a joint birthday party hosted in their back garden, to give Molly Weasley a respite from hosting duties before the next day’s wedding. Neville received a watch belonging to his father, which a thoughtful Alice had left in a vault for him, as well as the Complete Encyclopedia of Magical Herbs and Fungi, a samples collection kit, a complete set of defensive robes, and a rude-looking book from Ron that made him blush so hard he nearly turned purple, among other things. Harry received a watch that had belonged to James’s father, a prank kit, a new broom, and a copy of what looked like the same book, to similar effect, among other things. After they gave the gifts and cut the cake – a snitch surrounded by vines – there was dancing in the garden, and drinking. Sirius spun Remus around in an off-tempo waltz, while Hermione tried to teach Marley and Ginny some of the finer points of muggle dancing.
And then the Minister for Magic showed up, and the mood turned rather sour. He demanded to speak to Harry, Neville, Ron, and Hermione alone, and after a time, they acquiesced to his request, although they had made no promises about the use of extendable ears, and the marauders – such as they remained – sat together at the top of the stairs and listened.
He was executing Dumbledore’s will, it seemed. To Ron, he left a ‘deluminator’, a device Severus vaguely recalled having seen before. To Hermione, a book of children’s stories, which seemed strange. To Harry, even more strangely, a snitch he’d caught in first year, and to Neville,
“A cup.” The minister paused, significantly. It was evident he’d brought forth the item.
Harry recognized it first. “This is the cup that you drank from in first year, in Regulus’s test.” In the disastrous Philosopher’s Stone Incident.
Neville was also left the sword of Godric Gryffindor, which was not handed over due to not belonging to Dumbledore in the first place.
“He really was mad,” said Sirius, looking displeased by what they’d learned.
“No, said Remus, “he must have had a plan.”
--
Bill and Fleur’s wedding ceremony was long and dull, but the party was lovely. Severus ended up seated at a table with Jenny and Kingsley, and after dinner, he danced with Lily, and then with James, enjoying the evening air.
There was a sense of forboding, even then. They all knew that Harry and Neville had some sort of plan with their friends, related to whatever Dumbledore had told them over the last year. Ron was involved, based on his mother’s expression, and Hermione too. Severus had gone to check the wards on her family’s home, only to find her parents vanished. He hoped that wherever they were, it was safer than here.
He was dancing with Jenny, chatting about Rita Skeeter’s new book on Dumbledore, when Mad-Eye’s patronus burst in and told them that the minister was dead. Without a second thought, he tightened his grip on Jenny and apparated them home. James appeared just a second later, holding Marley with one hand and Remus with the other.
Sirius appeared a moment later, wand drawn and looking shaken, but, although they waited up until the sun rose the next morning, Lily, Harry, and Neville never made an appearance.
--
James, Severus,
If you can read this diary, you’ve already identified the old, familiar spell, and guessed the password. I don’t think Regulus was ever there for the brief, regrettable period where Sirius thought to call me ‘Birdbrain’, and I trust Padfoot and Moony enough, in spite of all the ways we’ve been betrayed in the past.
I don’t know how this war will go, or if I’ll survive it, but I wanted to put enough of myself into this so that if I don’t, you’ll have something left. I’ll try to leave it somewhere for you, someday soon, although I hope I see you first.
I always knew Harry was one for mad plans, but hiding from Regulus in his own house… it’s either terrible or brilliant. He hasn’t been here for a while, certainly, and Kreacher hasn’t either. Dobby, who you may recall as the House Elf Neville freed in 2nd year, is still here, but he’s free, and more loyal to Neville than to Reg, anyways. As for the house… much as it’s Regulus’s home, it’s still Sirius’s house, and I think the magic can sense that Harry is his godson, can sense that now that Regulus has betrayed us, Harry is Sirius's true heir. That matters.
Once they realized they were stuck with me for the duration, the children finally, finally told me what’s going on. Voldemort has ‘horcruxes’, a kind of cursed artifact created with death that make their creator unable to die. The diary Neville destroyed in 2nd year was one. We have another, the one Dumbledore died to retrieve. A locket that once belonged to Salazar Slytherin. It doesn’t seem to possess people, but it does make the wearer feel awful.
If there’s a way to destroy them, we don’t know what it is, but we’re scouring the Black family library for ideas. I’ve tried everything in my repertoire, and Hermione has tried everything in hers.
And then there’s the gifts from Dumbledore in the will. The Deluminator seems to be exactly what it says, but the other three gifts… there’s a mystery there. Hermione has been looking for code in the tales, but hasn’t found anything. The snitch, we haven’t found anything unique about either. Perhaps meant to be a reminder of happier times?
And then the damned cup. They’re all sure it was the one from Regulus’s potions trial. We’ll see what we can come up with. I’ll write here anything we find.
I love you both so much. I have for more than half my life, and I am grateful to have been your wife.
Give all my love to Remus and Sirius and Kingsley, and to our beautiful girls.
Lily Evans
--
It was surprisingly easy to convince Marley and Jenny that they weren’t going after the rest of the family. Not that it was safer at home, exactly, but looking for them could only bring more danger, and the reality was that the Potter name and Prince blood kept them relatively safe. It was muggleborns and their parents who were in the most danger, except, perhaps, for Neville himself. And Neville would only worry if he knew Marley or Jenny were in danger. So, James and Severus had patted themselves on the back and been sure that their argument was a compelling one.
--
It turned out, of course, that Jenny had been waiting only because she’d found much bigger fish to fry.
“You are not going back to Hogwarts!”
“Merlin’s saggy ballsack I’m not!”
“Language!”
That only got a two-finger salute from Jenny, who turned back to James with her arms crossed and her expression entirely Lily’s. “The rules say you have to send me back, or else we have to go on the run, which is pointless. I’m still a Slytherin. Hogwarts is the safest place in Britain for me. Uncle Regulus won’t let anything happen to me.”
Even before her sorting, Regulus had been Jenny’s personal hero. Her godfather. Severus wanted to wring his neck for letting her down. “Jens-”
Marley, leaning against the doorframe, said, “I’ll bet that’s what Dumbledore thought too. Worked out great for him.”
“He just wouldn’t do something like that without a reason!”
“Well he did!”
Jenny’s hiss at that was a sound of visceral anger, and she stormed from the room in full fourth-year fury, up the stairs, and slammed her bedroom door shut behind her. They thought the battle was won then, although they hated the cost.
--
But Jenny dug her heels in and refused to budge, and as September grew closer, all the evidence of her returning to school was there, book lists and an order form for new robes and a steady stream of owl post delivering parcels containing everything she needed for the new year.
Marley, of course, was the question, but when Molly wrote to tell them that Ginny was going back – Ron was not, on account of ‘Spattergroit’ – the matter was settled. Marley would not, ever, leave Ginny and Jenny there alone.
And she had a personal mission of her own, too. Severus caught her flipping her ‘Defense Association’ badge over and over between her fingers. It still displayed the date of last year’s final meeting, after their battle in the corridors. She was the same age now as Harry had been when he started the club. On the back of her hand, the silvery-white ‘I must not tell lies’ scar was stark against her brown skin.
“It was never much a question for you either, was it?” She shook her head. “You know that you don’t have to do this?”
She gave him a very teen eyeroll. “Gryffindors. Of course I don’t have to do this. I don’t have to do anything. But if you think for one instant that I don’t want to do this, then you’re just as dumb as they are.”
Severus put his hand on her shoulder. “I’m proud of you, and I love you. No matter what happens. You know that?”
She nodded, and set her shoulders with determination. “Most of my friends can’t come back to school this year. But some of them can. Ginny can. Luna can. Jenny can. And… I have to be there. Harry isn’t there to lead us, and Neville isn’t there to tell us when we’re being idiots, and someone has to look after them.”
And for whatever reason, Marley had decided that person was her. “You’re a good kid, Marls.”
She pulled him into a tight hug, and he could tell that she was trying not to let him see her cry.
--
Marlene Lily Potter,
I’m so damn proud of you, Marls. I think sometimes, you feel like you slip between the cracks, because of the way your siblings are, but the truth is that if you ever do end up slipping into the cracks, it’s because you’re the glue that holds people together. You have a remarkable love and loyalty in you, and a determination that makes me proud to be your mother. I think the world of you, and I know that you are so very loved, by all of us. You make our lives better just by existing in them
I love you more than any of these words can say.
Your mum,
Lily
--
James and Sirius took the children to the station together, because they were purebloods, and when they came home, Severus had to inform them that Lily’s sister and her husband had been murdered by deatheaters, over a war neither of them knew a single thing about.
--
Dear Papa and Dad,
They searched the train for Neville, top to bottom. Honestly it was… kind of funny? Jenny and I made it through safe, and are at Hogwarts now. I saw Regulus, and didn’t hit him. Slughorn is head of Slytherin now, and there are two Carrows on staff for DADA and Muggle Studies.
Not sure if they’ll let this letter through, hope they do though.
Love you both,
Marley
--
On September 14th, Mad-Eye Moody was killed defending three muggleborn wizards from unlawful arrest.
--
Severus, James,
What would you do if you found out a secret and didn’t know who left it for you to find?
We finally worked out the riddle of Neville’s cup. It was just the same as the original puzzle. You had to fill it with any liquid – water worked, so did tea – and pass it to someone else. After they drained it, the words ‘it is somewhere only you will think to look’ appeared. What a pointless, unhelpful riddle.
--
In October, Jenny and Marley attempted to steal the Sword of Godric Gryffindor from Regulus’s office, and were tortured in punishment, and James and Severus had to sit there and read about it in their letters.
--
Jennifer Sarah Potter,
Here is a confession: when the letter came to tell us you were in Slytherin, I was not surprised at all. We always knew you were smart and curious, and I think Ravenclaw would have suited you well, but you always had a drive to something more. Sometimes that has made me afraid for you. But it has also made me fiercely proud. I have never known you to back down from a fight. I was proud when you spoke up for Neville when his Great-Uncles were being especially loathsome. I was proud every fight you got into 1st year with some bigoted asshole – and Regulus told me all of them, I assure you – and I was proud when you told Dolores Umbridge the truth, even if I was furious that you were hurt. There is an ambition in wanting to change the world.
Jenny, my brilliant, wonderful, terrifying girl, I love you. There’s nothing more to say than that.
Your mum,
Lily
--
In November, Sirius was almost arrested while appearing before the Wizengamot, and, after fighting his way free with Kingsley’s help, they officially went into hiding. When James and Severus next heard his voice, it was coming through the airwaves. Order members arrived at their house, like clockwork, collecting potions from the cellar. There were never enough.
James, who also held a seat on the Wizengamot, stayed where he was, to do what little he could.
--
Fuck this fucking necklace. It makes everyone into miserable assholes.
--
At Christmas, Marley and Jenny didn’t come back from Hogwarts, and didn’t send reasons explaining why. James went out to fight deatheaters in Diagon Alley, and Severus went on a six-day undercover mission where he stayed in animagus form in the ministry, hiding in that awful statue of muggle servitude and watching what was really going on. When he returned, half the street had been blown up – the Kneazle was fine, off in Remus’s care – and it was evident that Harry, Neville and Lily had been there.
--
We figured out a piece of the riddle. It led us home, as you probably noticed on account of everything having exploded. It turns out Dumbledore’s riddle – we did need to fill it with a plant-based potion, and then we got a second line – meant he’d buried the sword in Neville’s herb garden. It was quite a ways down. I wonder how he got through the wards without us noticing. We’d moved back to the wartime wards by then, surely.
While we were here, Hermione wanted to go see Bathilda, to ask her about her own gift from Dumbledore. She and Neville went in while Harry and I were digging, and, uh, apparently Bathilda was killed and replaced by some kind of snake monster? Neville says the snake is called Nagini.
Nobody was hurt except for the fact that Neville’s wand is broken. I’ve given him mine to use, but without the twinned cores, it isn’t really the same thing. I thought about going home to get Frank’s for him, but I can’t see that suiting any better, and I don’t want to rain any more destruction on your heads.
Where were Jenny and Marley? Where were you? What happened?
--
In January, the blackmail notice arrived informing them that Marley had been arrested. No mention of Jenny was made. They were asked to hand over their wands and to inform the ministry what, exactly, had Neville Longbottom and his friends been doing in their house at Christmas.
James went to the ministry on the appointed day, to turn himself in. The ministry were quite confused to find him and not Severus, and missed the small animagus camouflaged in the grotesques. They did not miss the grown wizard who set fire to much of their paperwork, stole several classified files, and apparated James Potter to safety. They did not return to their home in Godric’s Hollow, what little of it remained, after that.
--
We destroyed the Locket. Which just leaves the question… where are the others? We must have been to dozens of sites by now, and just… nothing. Neville and Harry are both floundering. I can tell. Ron and Hermione have both been godsends lately. He rejoined us after Christmas, but didn’t have any word of any of you, except that you hadn’t gone into hiding and the girls were still at school.
--
In February, they broke into Azkaban with Sirius and Remus. Marley was not being held there, but a large number of muggleborns and their families were. They could feel good about the final result, even if James and Severus both left feeling increasingly disheartened.
--
In March, Remus’s friend Tonks had her baby and declared him the godfather. This made the child Marley’s godsibling, a reminder which left all of them the worse for wear.
Jenny hadn’t had a godmother. Regulus and Kingsley had both been her godfathers, so they wouldn’t have to choose. It was a silly thing to fixate on, but Severus couldn’t stop thinking about it. Marley was probably alive, if they wanted to hold her as leverage, but where was Jenny? Why had there been no mention of her?
Remus’s hand came down on his shoulder then. He was grinning, the most exhilarated expression of joy Severus had ever seen on his face.
“You have to come with me, now.”
--
They were all at Shell Cottage, with Bill and Fleur, except for Jenny. Everyone was the worse for wear – Neville had no wand, Lily had a bloody wound down her arm, Harry had a bruise across his entire face, and Marley hadn’t seen the sun in months – but they were there. They could touch them, and hold them and know that they were alive.
And there was word of Jenny too, a little. Marley thought she was safe, at the least. She and Luna Lovegood both agreed that Jenny had never arrived at the Hogwarts express, which was where they had been arrested, and both of them had been questioned about her absence on multiple occasions.
“Maybe being a Slytherin really did protect her,” she said, sitting at Severus’s side and watching the sunset. “Or maybe she just… worked out what they were going to do, but couldn’t warn us in time. I don’t know.”
Perhaps, Severus thought grimly, Regulus had come through in his godfatherly duties after all.
--
Mum, Dad, Papa,
I’m sorry that we’re doing this, but I promise it’s the best option. We have enough wands, and Polyjuice to cover the four of us, but this is something we need to do alone. We love you, and we’ll see you soon.
Harry & Neville
--
“They broke into Gringotts without us? I’m going to kill them.”
“‘Without us’ is the least concerning part of that sentence, Sirius”
--
When they were called by Aberforth to come to Hogwarts and fight, the very last thing they expected to see, upon crawling into the castle was Jenny and Ginny Weasley – who had failed to return for spring break – sitting and holding court in a room that had a certain Narnia flare to it.
“Welcome,” said Jenny, with a theatrical hand gesture, “to Cair Paravel. Better known as the Room of Requirement. I’ll be your host, Jennifer Potter, and with me as ever, my co-Queen, Ginevra Weasley.”
She might very well have continued monologuing in that theatrical vein if James had not swept her off her feet in a hug.
--
While they waited for the rest of the order to arrive, and James and Lily went in search of their elder two scoundrel children, Jenny explained to him what had happened.
“That last morning, right before we got on the train, Draco Malfoy cornered me in the common room. He said that I wasn’t going to enjoy where the train was going. So I went to the Room of Requirement, and I just stayed there. The House Elves helped me, brought me food and news, and helped me bring other people in when they needed it.”
That reminded him of something Lily had mentioned, from her time staying at Grimmauld Place. “Where was Kreacher?”
Jenny looked down at her hands. “He was there, sometimes. The others never let him see me, but… he must have known. I think… maybe he justified it because Sirius is the head of the family. I don’t know.”
Something didn’t quite add up. In fact, several somethings.
--
Having narrowly escaped with their lives from the flaming room, Severus pressed his wand to Malfoy’s neck. He’d tried to kill them only moments ago, but he had also saved Jenny, and, if Harry was to be believed, had lied to protect them when they were captured by Deatheaters.
“There’s a secret tunnel,” he said, and described the location of the collapsed tunnel behind the mirror on the 4th floor. “Go there, ward the entrance, and stay. When the fighting dies down, if we win, you can tell them I told you the location and they’ll believe you. If we lose, tell them I made you go there. Do you understand?”
Malfoy nodded, and with a little legilimancy, Severus could see that he meant it. He let the boy up, and watched him run off in the appropriate direction.
Harry, Neville, Hermione and Ron had all vanished, and he was left alone in a half-destroyed hallway with Fred and Percy Weasley, both of them looking the worse for wear.
“Did they…”
Both Weasleys just shrugged.
--
The brief armistice found Severus back in the great hall, searching the room for any sign of his partners or children. He counted up each of the Weasleys, huddled around Arthur’s body, and then approached Sirius, who he saw curled against a wall.
“Remus?”
He shook his head and pointed nearby, to where the body of Tonks lay. “I haven’t seen Remus.”
Severus left him there, and soon, with aching relief, was able to point Remus in his direction. He waved to Kingsley standing and issuing orders, and then,
“Oh,” he said, and knelt beside James, who was sitting, head in his hands, next to the body of Minerva McGonagall.
It wasn’t hard to determine what had happened. James had been her prodigy. The prodigal son. And Minerva had loved him very well. They all knew that.
And then he spotted Lily, standing between Harry and Neville. Harry and Lily soon came over to James, to be with him, but Neville stood, frozen, and Severus could read his mind without having to use legilimancy. He’d always hated the idea that people might die for him.
“Come on,” he said, and put his arm around Neville’s shoulders, “let’s get out of here.”
And Neville led him up to the Headmaster’s office, and told him that Regulus was dead. “Voldemort killed him. Just before the fighting stopped. He used Nagini to do it.”
And then he produced a vial of memories, and they went into the pensieve together.
--
And there was Regulus, standing there in just the same office. He looked to be still in his early twenties, and he was wearing his professor’s robes.
“I’m sorry,” he said, hands twisting nervously at his sides, “but I can’t stay here while Sirius and Remus are hurting. They’d be there for me, if our positions were reversed. I know they would.”
Why had Regulus chosen this to show to Neville? Why this memory? Neville had only been a baby at the time, but he certainly knew the story of Regulus’s aborted first attempt at teaching.
“Very well,” said Dumbledore, “but I will have need of you here, some day. I believe you are the only one who can fulfil an important duty for me.”
Regulus seemed so wary and worn. It was how they had all looked, in those awful days. “What?”
Dumbledore stood from behind his desk. Fawkes fluttered over to perch on his shoulder and played with his hair while he looked out the window. “I believe Voldemort will return. When that day comes… I will need someone to infiltrate his side, to gain his confidences. I believe you can do that.”
Severus kept his face a careful mask so Neville couldn’t see the hole these words had torn at the very center of him.
Regulus, wary, said, “I can’t do that.”
Dumbledore countered, “you must. It is the only way to ensure Mr. Longbottom’s safety.”
The memory dissolved. Together, they watched Regulus grow older, begin to believe that Voldemort was never coming back. They watched him begin to forgive himself for Barty’s treachery.
And then he came upon Quirrell making an attempt to steal the philosopher’s stone while his troll attacked the students. And Regulus dropped to one knee, and called the ghost ‘Master’, and promised to help it get through his barrier.
Voldemort hadn’t trusted him then. It was obvious. But Regulus told beautiful lies. He spun dreams the way he had for Severus as a boy, talking about House Elf liberation and creature rights and every ambition he had never fulfilled. But here the dreams he spoke of were dark, of domination and subjugation and of making his mother proud.
--
He really didn’t know what was going on with Harry in second year, and they watched him spit vitriol at Dumbledore after the truth came out, pound the desk with his hands while the old wizard sat, serene and unphased.
--
He whispered, “Dumbledore wants something from me, and I’m not sure I know how to give it.”
And a memory of Severus answered back, “do I get to know what it is?”
--
Regulus had been there, in the graveyard, after Voldemort returned to life, had watched Neville suffer and had done nothing but subtly brighten the sheen on the trophy with a flick of his wand so Neville might remember that it was a portkey.
--
Narcissa had come to him in the dead of night. She had pleaded with her cousin, who was Slytherin but good, to save her son, and he had sworn to do so. It had been the perfect excuse. Family loyalty could close the circle, could explain his treachery in a way Voldemort would find mythic, poetic, and perfectly comprehensible.
--
Neville took his hand, as they watched Dumbledore, deathly sick, tell Regulus to kill him. He watched the ensuing argument, where they discussed Horcruxes, whatever those were, and how Neville was one, and how the only way to end it was for him to die.
They watched Regulus scream and rage and throw things at Dumbledore. And cry.
--
And they watched him come to terms with what had to be done, and set the plan in motion. He’d killed Dumbledore, of course. That part was obvious. The hard part had been conducted later, while everyone else was occupied at the funeral. Regulus had, with help from Kreacher, altered part of Dumbledore’s will to add the gift of the goblet for Neville. He had obscured with his changes a line about how Harry and Neville should share their gifts, as they had always worked together before. Then, he’d gone to Godric’s Hollow, where the wards didn’t block a house elf who technically obeyed Sirius, and had buried the sword there, trusting it to stay until it was needed.
--
Regulus been well aware that Neville was hiding at Number 12, and had instructed Kreacher to look out for him, and for Marlene and Jenny.
He’d summoned Malfoy to his office, had casually mentioned to the boy he knew was having doubts that the Potter children would be taken the following morning. Jenny had been right to believe that he would protect her. Her trust was founded.
--
Barty Crouch had died, choked by his own hand, on the floor of Malfoy Manor, and Regulus had stood over the body, and if he wept it was for himself.
--
“Neville,” Severus said, as he landed, disjointedly, back in his own body. But Neville genuinely startled him.
“Petrificus totalus!” He shouted, and the spell caught Severus full in the side, sending him crashing back against the bookcase.
His body utterly still, he watched Neville kneel beside him, tears running freely from his face. “I’m sorry, Papa. I’m sorry. Tell Mum and Dad and Jenny and Marley that I love them.”
He straightened, and Severus could no longer see his face. To himself, seemingly, Neville said, “he changed the will. He’s supposed to share the snitch with me.”
And then, with one final, “I’m sorry,” he was gone.
--
Voldemort’s voice was high and cruel as he announced, “Neville Longbottom is dead,” and Severus, wandless, wordless, motionless, broke free from his bonds, grabbed his wand, and ran down the stairs from the headmaster’s office, as hard and as fast as he had run in all his life, to hear the tail end of Lily’s scream reverberating as he tore through the entrance hall.
He came into the crowd to find that Harry was standing between them and Voldemort, wandless. Neville’s body lay curled on the ground at the feet of the man responsible for all of this, and Severus could feel his ears pounding. He would have leapt forward then, to do something stupid and terrible, if Remus had not grabbed him and pulled him back.
“You are the scion of very old and powerful magic,” Voldemort was saying to Harry, “one who I know very well, I believe. You have been a loyal servant before. Pettigrew and Crouch both suggested that you were powerful at defensive magics. Stronger than the Longbottom boy. You would make a very good deatheater.”
Harry shifted backwards and forwards on the balls of his feet, an almost fey posture that displayed nothing of nervousness or fear. “That’s a very generous compliment. But I’m not sure ‘fascist lacky’ would look very good on my uni applications.”
And Sirius laughed, standing just behind Severus. He laughed, and Voldemort’s face turned ruinously murderous like Severus had never seen.
“So be it,” he said, and Severus missed the next several seconds of monologuing as he engaged in a wrestling match with Remus. Given the unfair advantage of natural werewolf strength, he lost. When he looked back up, his son was standing in a column of fire, and even Remus could not hold him back.
At that very same moment, a terrible caterwauling came from the forest, and then the centaurs were there, and the giants were fighting each other, and there was utter chaos as Severus shoved to the front of their group, and Lily drew her wand at his side, and all around them the battle recommenced.
And Harry, who had been a practicing occlumens since the age of 13, broke free from whatever spell Voldemort had him under, pulled the flaming sorting hat from his head, the sword of Godric Gryffindor from within the hat, and, darting forward, slashed it up through the neck of Voldemort’s snake with the same practiced, athletic ease he brought to all his Quidditch games.
Voldemort let out an ungodly shriek, and, when Severus was finally able to tear his eyes away from Harry, he realized that Neville’s body had vanished, and he felt a grin begin to spread, unchecked, across his face.
--
Voldemort spat out the killing curse, and for the second time that night, Neville raised his wand and said, “petrificus totalus”
It turned out that the spell didn’t really matter. Voldemort’s curse rebounded, as it had so many years ago, and he fell to ground, finally and truly dead. People shivered backwards, afraid of the terrible display of power they had just witnessed.
Bare seconds later, Severus had bolted across the room from where he stood with Remus over Fenrir Greyback’s body, wrapping Neville in a fierce embrace and whispering, “I forgive you,” after his every apology, and, “I love you,” into the silences when he said nothing at all.
Harry nearly shoved Severus out of the way to wrap his arms around Neville, whispering something about, “did you use it?”
Neville’s answer, it seemed, was for his ears alone. The truth of what had been concealed in Harry’s snitch, and what Neville had done with it, was one that Severus never learned.
--
It poured with rain on the day they buried Regulus Black. The crowd was nothing like the one Minerva McGonagall had received, with decades’ worth of students who had loved her fiercely. Nor did it compare to Arthur Weasley’s, with his family crowded tight together, nor Nymphodora Tonks’s, where she was posthumously awarded a service medal for her work as an auror, and everyone stared at Remus holding baby Teddy in his arms. At that very moment, the baby looked so much like him that if Severus hadn’t known better he would have said the relationship was biological.
Regulus’s funeral was attended by a scant few people. Even those who knew intellectually his true allegiance rarely found it in themselves to forgive him. So his funeral was small. The Marauders and all their various children. A newly returned Vera. Ginny had come with Harry, and Marley had brought Luna Lovegood. Kreacher, perhaps the last person in the world whose feelings about Regulus were utterly uncomplicated, joined them.
And then there were the other members of the Black family, such as they remained. Andromeda, of course, and Draco. Narcissa remained under house arrest, and Lucius in Azkaban. There had never been a moment of true awkwardness quite like Draco’s arrival, but Jenny had beckoned to him, and he had sat beside her, quiet as a mouse, throughout the ceremony. He’d mattered to Regulus, some way or another, so it made sense to have him there.
Sirius spoke first, of Regulus, his brother. Then Kreacher, a few words about Regulus as a model pureblood, irony of ironies. And then Jenny stood, and made her way to the front of the church. There was a green trim on her black dress, and the soles of her shoes squeaked from being wet.
“Regulus Black was my godfather,” she said, firmly, and, eyes on Malfoy, added, “and he was yours too, I think.” This, Severus had never known. “He had no children of his own. He never married. But he had so much love in his heart, and he would do anything for it. Regulus dedicated his life to trying to make the world a better place, and he knew he wouldn’t get glory for it, or be remembered for it, but he did it for us. Because he loved us. And I think the best thing we can do now, the only thing we can do, is love as fiercely, and with as much dedication, as he did.”
When she sat back in her seat, the Malfoy boy passed her his handkerchief, and Harry gave him a look that wasn’t seethingly furious for once.
--
Dear Severus,
I wonder what world this letter will be opened into? I am not so much of a fool as to believe I will be there to see it. But I try to hold on to hope. I hope that you have survived, and that James and Lily are with you. I hope Sirius is there to curse my name, with Remus at his side. I hope they will all understand that I could not leave too many letters, in avoidance of suspicions. I have such hopes for your children. For Harry, and Marley, and for Jenny. I hope you won’t begrudge my leaving her everything. I think the title of Lady Black would suit her in a way it never would Harry, in a way it never has Sirius. I hope Sirius sees that too. As for Neville, oh how I hope. It is all I can do for him. He received a miracle once. A beautiful, tragic miracle. I hope that lightning might strike twice. If anyone deserves that, Neville does.
What I have done is inexcusable, but… know that every choice I made, I made with the intent to protect you. I cannot ask for your forgiveness, but never feel guilt as I have. You did nothing wrong by me. Not ever. Not any of you. You are not responsible for a single one of my actions.
Your friend,
RAB
--
At the end of the summer, before the children went back to school, they had a party in the mostly-restored garden of their home in Godric’s Hollow. Everyone was there. Marauders and Weasleys and associated friends. Marley and Luna were slow dancing, even though nobody was playing any music. Sirius was playing with Teddy, whose hair and face shifted as he giggled. Remus was watching fondly, standing by the punchbowl, and Severus knew, from a conversation they’d had a few days ago, that he had a ring in his pocket. Somebody, probably Jenny, had invited Draco Malfoy, and to Severus’s great surprise, he was sitting with Ginny and Harry, looking… rather calm. Harry was smiling, looking between the two of them with something like wonder. Severus wouldn’t have gone so far as to predict a spring wedding, but he thought Harry might be on track to prove himself, once again, an inescapable carbon copy of James.
James was in the kitchen with Molly Weasley, making something that smelled delicious, and through the open doorframe Severus was leaning against, he could hear the faint sounds of their conversation. It was strange to think that James was going to be a professor at Hogwarts next year. But not nearly as strange as the fact that Severus himself was. Aurora Sinestra was to be head of Slytherin house, naturally, but Severus was going to be the Potions Master. Dumbledore, he thought, would have been smug about that.
And there was Lily, sitting with Kingsley and Vera. Lily was wearing a tanktop, and the deep scar of ‘mudblood’ was plainly visible on her arm. But she carried no shame, and Severus loved that about her. He loved everything about her.
There was a shriek from Jenny just then, who ducked out of the way of a rocket that narrowly missed her head to the Weasley twins’ matching yells of “our bad!” echoing from behind Severus’s shed. It was a good thing he hadn’t begun any new experiments since the reconstruction had finished.
Neville came out of the house beside Severus, and leaned against the opposite side of the door frame. They watched Jenny grab her wand and chase the twins through the garden, over the fence, and into the back lane.
“How are you holding up?”
If it had been hard for Neville to carry the world, the residual weight of having carried it was not much lighter. But today he smiled, broad and bright.
“With Malfoy here, they don’t need me for even numbers for the Quidditch game.”
It was a small thing, but if it was enough to make Neville smile, then it was more than enough. “Seeker, I believe? What are Harry’s odds like?”
“Ginny and Malfoy are going to wipe the floor with him. About time too, really.”
And they stood there and people-watched until James called them both in to carry dishes.