Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Life moves on, but sometimes it’s slow enough for us to catch up. 

 By the third day after everyone had woken up, they were all recovered, bandages removed, and sitting in a conference room with the head of the table empty as they waited for Eden.

Seonghwa kept laying a hand over the sensitively regrown skin over the back of his neck, feeling the ache there like a comforting reminder of soft skin where metal used to protrude. 

He realized he was pressing a bit too hard, removing his hand and straightening slightly.

At his side, Hongjoong sat and leaned his elbows on the table, talking across the way with Yunho who was regaling them about the incident yesterday where a nurse hit him and San for trying to lift Jongho like a barbell.

(Stars help these poor nurses that had to deal with their antsy asses that couldn’t sit still for three minutes straight.) 

Next to them, Yeosang was half asleep on his arms that were folded beneath his head and Wooyoung was smiling at him, probably intending to be annoying, but his eyes were too fond for him to seem anything but whipped as he massaged the back of Yeosang’s neck, teasing and calling him old for being sleepy so early in the morning.

Mingi and San were arm wrestling, and Jongho was waiting to play who would win.

Seonghwa was mostly watching Hongjoong, how he leaned on his palm, nodding along and grinning as Yunho showed him the bruise from where Jongho hit him after he dropped him. 

Hongjoong seemed… peaceful. Content, as he laughed along with Yunho.

And really, that was all Seonghwa wanted, especially given their circumstances.

All of them were at a terrifying, alarming part of their lives where they were leaving a past behind but still carrying the weight of it with them. And then there was a question of….

Well, what now?

Hence, the meeting with Eden.

Wooyoung was now also leaning on Yeosang’s arm, talking quietly. San was now asking people if they wanted to eat breakfast after all this. 

They were all just sitting… and talking. 

Seonghwa sat in silence, marveling for a moment at how… normal the scene was. As if three days ago, they weren’t in surgeries to remove an implant from a psychopath in an attempt to keep themselves from being targeted by other psychopaths.

And here they were… sitting at a table and chatting about what they had been up to. Sharing stories, sleeping, playing, talking… Part of Seonghwa felt offended. Part of him wanted the closure of still carrying that fear and weight of the past more prominently. Part of him wanted solemnity and dreariness, despite wanting none of these people to ever have to experience that ever again.

This sort of peace… he couldn’t suddenly wrap his mind around it. Their escape had only lasted a few days, at most, but Seonghwa suddenly couldn’t think of being able to move on from it so quickly. 

The door hissed open. 

All of them fell silent as Eden stepped in, nodding to all of them comfortingly, making some of them relax as he stood at the head of the table.

“I won’t try and scare you with formality and suspense,” Eden said, taking a seat and glancing around at them all, eyes carefully roaming over them, taking note of any signs of something wrong.

Kids, Eden had called them. 

And even if Seonghwa instinctively rejected the term, Eden had a way of making you feel that way- not in an condescending way, but in the way that he just seemed to have a handle on everything that you didn’t.

And Seonghwa was okay with that. They owed everything to Eden. 

“So, we’ll start immediately,” he said, folding his hands in front of himself, leaning forward, looking slightly tired after being in the command room all day before meeting with them.

Wooyoung nudged Yeosang until he sat up, rubbing at his eyes and shoving back his hair that fell in his face.

Hongjoong glanced at Seonghwa, worried, but with a confident smile as he linked their hands beneath the table, turning to Eden as he clung to Seonghwa. He squeezed Hongjoong’s hand gently, nodding to himself in comfort.

Things were okay, he reminded himself, Hongjoong’s hand warm against his. 

“All of you have consented to dropping the charges, and have agreed against creating an extensive investigation after Dr. Kim, correct?” Eden glanced around, eyebrow raised to see if anyone would withdraw that. 

But they all nodded without hesitation. 

After hearing from Eden and what he’d spoken about with Patrol, trying to publicly expose Dr. Kim would only keep them all caught in this mess for a long time. And all it would end with is a dead man getting a useless legal slap on the wrist.

His associates were being looked into and the Ateez Program was being dispelled. Their implants were removed, and as far as the law was concerned, their names never show up in the history books.

Seonghwa had sat on Hongjoong’s bed in the middle of the night, both of them crossing their legs and staring off solemnly as Hongjoong warred with the bitter part of himself that wanted everything his father worked for to be torn down, disgraced, and burned.

And then the part of himself that never wanted to think about what had happened to them ever again. In the end, this part of him won. 

The desire to leave it behind outweighed the flickering flame of anger that came and went with the day and night. 

He’d looked up at Seonghwa, smiling genuinely, if a bit tightly, as he gripped Seonghwa’s hand, lacing their fingers so their palms lined up warmly. “I just want to forget… and stay with you,” he had whispered, nodding sternly. “He’s gone… So I just want to be able to be happy with you and the others, now. He’s taken enough of my life away.”

He smiled when he said it. 

Sometimes… moving forward was the greatest revenge. 

Seonghwa followed whatever Hongjoong wanted. And the others agreed without any sort of fight, as well.

“Because of this, you’re now all free from this mess,” Eden assured them, spreading his hands. “The doctors have declared you healed and fit for any kind of duty, and all of you are officially considered properly nourished, hydrated, and healthy.” He smiled warmly, looking glad.

One thing that had taken Seonghwa off guard… was how much Eden cared about all of them. Not just Hongjoong. Seonghwa didn’t know if Hongjoong had told Eden about them, or if he was just the kind of person to adopt whoever was needed… but the smiles and pats he gave all of them… were welcome and a comfort.

“So,” Eden said gently, shrugging openly, “there’s… not much left for you all to do.” He placed his palms against the table. “This meeting is to discuss and figure out what step you all want to take next.”

Even though Seonghwa knew… he still felt a blip of panic in his chest.

What came after this? He ran from his home to a better place, but that place was gone, too, now.

 He supposed… he could go home. Stay there until he gathered enough money to move somewhere else. Maybe he could just join the space marines… just become a regular pilot, rather than an elite special ops.

He glanced over, seeing Hongjoong nodding along to Eden.

But… what about Hongjoong? 

The two of them had talked about wanting to stick together, but there was even less of a home available for Hongjoong than there was for Seonghwa. 

They’d decided on that same night, curled up in bed, that they didn’t want to say goodbye. Neither of them had a place to return to, so they were all they had. 

For a moment, Seonghwa thought about offering his home to Hongjoong.

But Lord knows the hell they would go through there. Part of Seonghwa wanted to say fuck it and force his family to suffer… but he didn’t want to put Hongjoong through that.

Maybe if they sold the old cruiser, they could all split the money among those who needed it?

“You are all free to go wherever you want,” he assured them graciously. “ Horizon will take you wherever that is, no matter how far. If you want to go home, another planet, a base somewhere- just let me know, and I’ll get you there and set up with some credits to keep you going.”

Seonghwa looked up, eyes widening as his heart skipped.

Eden had mentioned dropping them off wherever they wanted to go, but… he’d never mentioned giving them money. Seonghwa didn’t doubt that it wouldn’t be a lot, but enough to make a start with.

He chewed his lip as everyone watched Eden, waiting for him to finish, Wooyoung and Yeosang’s hands intertwined with Wooyoung’s thumb rubbing circles on the back of Yeosang’s hand.   

“However… I understand that most of you were here to escape certain kinds of lives,” Eden went on slowly, choosing his words carefully and his expression intentionally open and understanding. “And I don’t think I can give enough to you to completely restart your lives over.”

Seonghwa’s heart had time to dip, squeezing Hongjoong’s hand before Eden shrugged.

“I’m sorry I’m not able to do more for you, but the only other option I can offer is to let you stay aboard the Horizon .” His expression pinched apologetically, but Seonghwa was suddenly light headed with relief.

Stay… here?

“You all were trained insanely well, especially for your ages,” Eden explained, spreading his hands openly. “I know that having you on board wouldn’t be a burden, but if any of you are sick and tired of space, I wouldn’t be surprised. I can help you guys contact and get to whoever or wherever you need,” he assured them. “But the only other place I have to offer is here.”

That was…

Holy shit, that was more than Seonghwa had ever fucking imagined. He’d been prepared for another four years of going back into hell until he could move out on his own.

His excitement, however… dwindled a bit as he glanced at Hongjoong who continued to watch Eden, not showing disappointment or joy or anything else. As if he were thinking over something very hard.

But Seonghwa… Seonghwa knew that he wanted to follow Hongjoong. 

If Hongjoong didn’t want to stay in space, if he wanted to leave Eden behind as a piece of his past, if he wanted to move to a small place in the middle of nowhere that they would only be able to afford by going into some deep debt…

Fuck it, Seonghwa had gone through worse than inflation and interest rates. So had Hongjoong. 

“You all have time to think about your options,” Eden assured them. “As long as you need. I’ll take any questions you have about where you’re going, or about staying here.” He stood, smiling gently. “I’ll let you all talk and sleep on it. Come find me anytime when you decide your answers.”

“Thank you,” Hongjoong murmured, voice heavy as the others all echoed the gratefulness. Truly, Seonghwa could have cried at the opportunities open to him.

But he immediately glanced at Hongjoong who faced forward as Eden left with a pleasant wave, staring at the table, like he was conflicted.

“Mingi and I,” Jongho said quietly, glancing around at everyone before eyeing Mingi to confirm his statement, “were planning on going to his home planet. He wanted to show me around… and then I sort of wanted to be able to show him mine.”

Mingi nodded when Jongho glanced at him. “It’s not… wanting to run away from space or anything,” he assured them quickly. “I’d like to come back up here one day. But… I miss my family. And… well, I’d like them to meet Jongho because he was the first friend I ever made, even if it… was unconventional.”

“You don’t have to explain yourself to us,” Hongjoong said gently, and when Seonghwa glanced over, his eyes were soft and happy. “We got out of there, and we’re free now. You can go wherever you want. You don’t have to stay with us or in space.”

Seonghwa nodded quickly, glancing between the two. “I think it’s really amazing for you guys to see each other’s families,” he encouraged, smiling when Jongho looked relieved.

“Um.”

They all glanced at San, who sat straight but fiddled with his fingers nervously.

“Actually, Yunho was telling me about how he wanted to see his family and talk about all the crazy shit, since he hadn’t seen them since…” San glanced at Yunho who nodded with a bright smile, making San brighten a bit. “And he, uh… he invited me to stay with him for a while, since… I didn’t really want to have to go back home.”

“You can stay as long as you want,” Yunho reinforced, grinning brightly. “You’ll love it there, there’s so much stuff to do in the city.” He gestured over his shoulder to the door. “But… I mean, Eden said you could stay here, if you wanted. Would you rather-“

“No, I’ll… I’ll come with you,” San assured him, sitting up straighter, looking hesitant and then determined. “I… Honestly, you made me excited to see if after everything you told me about it.”

San’s smile was grateful. As if the stories Yunho told had been a good distraction.

Seonghwa smiled quietly as Yunho nodded, looking excited to be able to show off where he grew up.

“This is the sweetest stuff I’ve ever heard,” Hongjoong chuckled, leaning on his hand, his other hand oddly limp in Seonghwa’s grip. “No, this is adorable.”

“Said the one who started sucking face,” San chuckled, looking at him pointedly.

Hongjoong merely lifted his eyebrows before glancing at Wooyoung and Yeosang. “Did either of you have a chance to think about your plans?”

Yeosang was staring at his and Wooyoung’s linked hands, a bit blank, but Wooyoung glanced at him, quiet but not hesitant. “We… haven’t, really,” he confessed.

“Too busy sucking face,” Yunho snickered behind his hand.

“The next person who uses the term ‘sucking face’ is getting sucker punched,” Jongho threatened, rolling his eyes and gagging.

Seonghwa smiled as San mimicked him mockingly, and Wooyoung cleared his throat exaggeratedly to gain their attention back. “We haven’t talked about it, really,” Wooyoung continued, his eyes flickering back to Yeosang rapidly. “But I know I’m never going back to my old home, and Yeosang only joined because he had nowhere else to go.”

Wooyoung paused, eyes still on Yeosang who didn’t move, lips rolling thoughtfully.

“You have time for a decision,” Seonghwa comforted gently, glancing between the two of them. “Eden said you could take your time. Think it over and see if-“

“I want to stay.”

Seonghwa stopped speaking as Yeosang glanced over at Wooyoung through his bangs.

“If… If you want to,” he added quietly, his hand tightening its grip on Wooyoung. “I’d… rather stay.” He wet his lips. “We don’t really have anywhere else… and Eden is nice, and…” He glanced back at his hands, face heating. “I liked… flying with you…”

His free hand tugged his hair into his face, but Seonghwa was watching Wooyoung’s face practically explode in unbridled joy, grinning so widely, Seonghwa braced himself before Wooyoung ever threw himself at Yeosang.

Yeosang made a whining noise of protest, but his arms were pinned at his sides as Wooyoung twined his arms around Yeosang’s neck, practically smothering the other against his chest as he rubbed his cheek rapidly over Yeosang hair, squeezing too tight.

Seonghwa didn’t even scold them. Simply rolled his eyes and waited as Yeosang tapped Wooyoung’s arm pointedly- a request, more than a demand, to be freed.

Wooyoung buried his face in Yeosang’s hair, his entire head disappearing in Wooyoung’s arms.

But Seonghwa still caught him whispering- “We’ll stay as long as you want.”

Yeosang stopped tapping, his hand hovering over Wooyoung for a moment before laying on his bicep, squeezing it hesitantly, almost… like a thank you. He saw the tip of Yeosang’s head bob in a nod, and Wooyoung pressed a firm kiss to Yeosang’s temple, squeezing him one last time before letting go.

He was still smiling like this was the best thing, petting Yeosang’s hair to fix it as if nothing had happened.

Yeosang glanced around at all of them, eyes soft but his face flushed a dark red as he looked away when he made eye contact, swatting away Wooyoung’s hand that fussed over the mess he’d made.

Wooyoung retreated without fighting, still glancing at Yeosang with his eyes shining. “I guess Yeosang and I will plan to stick around,” he decided, a hand laying over Yeosang’s on the table.

Seonghwa gave the embarrassed boy one last glance, but despite the color on his cheeks and his stiff posture like he wanted to sink into the ground… Seonghwa would swear he was smiling.

“What about you guys?”

Seonghwa, logically, knew that the question would eventually come around to them, but that didn’t stop his entire brain from blanking as San asked a simple question.

Seonghwa opened his mouth, knowing full well that he had nothing on his tongue to speak, glancing at Hongjoong beside him…

Hongjoong was staring at San, smiling quietly but his eyes were heavy. “We haven’t discussed it,” Hongjoong answered for them quietly.

Seonghwa knew it wasn’t, but his entire brain was yelling at him that Hongjoong was telling him to discuss it. Had Hongjoong wanted to discuss it before this point? Had Seonghwa missed on that cue?

He looked to Hongjoong who glanced at him, as if he was trying not to stare, despite their hands holding onto each other.

“Would you want to stay here?” Seonghwa prompted gently, making Hongjoong look at him fully. “Or… would you rather leave it behind? I know you said Eden wasn’t bad memories, but the whole-“

“What about you?” Hongjoong broke in, a bit stern, and Seonghwa blinked, closing his mouth.

“What about me?”

“What about what you want?” Hongjoong accused, as if Seonghwa had been trying to pull a fast one on him.

Seonghwa frowned, a bit confused by the response, but he softened his gaze as Hongjoong’s eyes scanned his face. “I don’t want to return home,” he confessed honestly. “But I would, if it meant staying where I wanted.”

“What does that mean?” Hongjoong questioned, frowning deeply, his hand twitching in Seonghwa’s. “Do you know where you want to go or not? Where do you want to stay?” he demanded.

Seonghwa… had thought they had already covered this. But he shrugged. “Wherever you want to go,” he murmured, surprised when he heard no fake vomiting. “If you want off of this ship, but don’t have anywhere to go, we can suffer through my home for a while until we can go somewhere else,” he offered gently, watching Hongjoong only frown deeper.

Looking almost alarmed in the back of his eyes.

Seonghwa wet his lips, feeling… nervous as he shrugged. “If you want to stay on here and keep piloting and stuff… I don’t mind staying off planet for the rest of my life. Here sounds better than home, but if you didn’t want it, I’d never dream of cutting off your options for escape.”

Seonghwa knew that Hongjoong didn’t have a home planet. His father had worked in space for so long, all their land and house were sold when they flew off when Hongjoong was 8.

But if distance was what he needed, Seonghwa would suffer through his own home, doing his best to keep Hongjoong out of it.

“So which-“

Seonghwa cut off as Hongjoong stood up rapidly, his mouth open like he was about to yell something as his eyes turned almost frantic, glancing around-

He seemed to realize how violent that came across, his tense shoulders falling as he stared around at all of them, mouth flapping and eyes misty for a moment.

“I- I’m sorry-“

Hongjoong tried to turn and run, but seemed to have forgotten that Seonghwa was holding his hand, jerking to a halt before Seonghwa could let go and allow him to leave. He looked back at Seonghwa quickly, eyes almost afraid and mouth trying to speak as Seonghwa released his grip, holding his hands up to show he hadn’t meant to hold him back.

A question was on the back of his tongue as he stared worriedly at Seonghwa, shaking his head subtly-

“Do you want to leave?” Seonghwa asked, standing and positioning his hands like he was ready to coral Hongjoong from the room and into the hall.

“N- No,” Hongjoong said, glancing at them all who stared at him, ready to move or leave at his word. He swallowed, blinking hard and seeming to gather himself a bit. He was breathing a bit shallowly, but his tone was gentle. “No, I… Sorry, I…” He trailed off, taking a step back towards his empty chair.

Seonghwa eyed him carefully, hands still held out. “We can finish later,” he assured him gently, sitting with Hongjoong. “We can go back to the room-“

“I…” Hongjoong swallowed, folding his hands together and twisting his fingers gently. “I think I… I want to stay,” he decided quietly, glancing at Seonghwa. “Sorry, I was… I got scared for a second.”

Seonghwa frowned gently, glancing at the others, but taking Hongjoong’s admission as permission to speak on it. “Scared of what?” he asked, laying his hand on the table as an offering, if Hongjoong wanted it.

Part of him felt better when Hongjoong took it after only a moment’s hesitation.

“I know… that the implants are gone,” he murmured, staring at his lap, his hand shaking a bit in Seonghwa’s.

He laid his other hand over it, holding it until he calmed a bit.

“And I know that staying here with Eden would be safe and he’s a good person, and we’d be okay,” he croaked. “But I just… For a second, I was sure that staying in space was going to get us killed, and I just wanted to run-“

Hongjoong’s jaw tightened angrily.

“I’m so tired of running ,” He hissed. “I wanted to run, but the only place we could run would be your stupid, abusive family, and I’d rather spend every day paranoid than put us through that-“

“If… If you really want to get away,” Yunho said quietly, looking regretful for interrupting, wincing. “If you really wanted it, you could come to my home planet,” he offered gently with an encouraging smile. “My mom’s always cool with my friends.”

“Mine, too,” Mingi assured Hongjoong.

“And mine,” Jongho agreed, nodding firmly.

Seonghwa stared at them, a bit… shocked. Not that they would offer, but that… staying with one of them had never crossed his mind. His blood felt warm as he smiled back at Yunho.

Hongjoong already had tears spilling over his cheeks, racing down and dripping into his lap as he stared at all of them, looking like he wanted to say so many things.

“You guys… are amazing,” he managed weakly, bringing his free hand up and wiping at his eyes. His voice trembled. “I- I don’t know how to tell you how much you mean to me-“

“You just did,” San chuckled quietly, though his eyes were warm.

Seonghwa rubbed circles in Hongjoong’s wrist gently as he sucked a sharp breath, gathering himself as he straightened, looking… sturdier.

“I… I’ll stay with Eden,” he said with determination, though it was wet. “I… I want to stay and get myself together… and then maybe when things are further along, I’ll go back planetside. I think…” He glanced at Seonghwa, as if checking his reaction. “I think… I’m not done with space yet.”  

And Seonghwa would have kicked himself rather than disagree with Hongjoong, smiling as he nodded.

In truth… Seonghwa loved piloting, even if his experience was tainted with the things they had done. But he was absolutely fine with overwriting those memories with new ones.

“Then we’ll stay,” Seonghwa assured him, his blood warm and thick as Hongjoong tried to smile weakly. “And we’ll be safe.”

“You guys can sleep next door!” Wooyoung burst, wrapping an arm around Yeosang and pressing their faces together, making Yeosang whine again, even as he held Wooyoung’s hand over his shoulder.

Hongjoong laughed wetly, wiping the stray tears away, sniffling. “I’ll tell Eden to put us on the other side of the ship.”

Wooyoung gasped, looking wounded as Yeosang started struggling half heartedly to free himself. Wooyoung turned, kissing Yeosang’s cheek without breaking offended eye contact with Hongjoong defiantly.

Like a sedative, Yeosang stopped struggling, face flooding with heat as he stared at the table, wishing to disappear, but it allowed Wooyoung to hold him like a sedated puppy.

“I hope Eden doesn’t put the two of you on a shift together and that you only have to work with me,” Wooyoung said petulantly as Yeosang finally sighed and relaxed in his hold a bit.

“Well, I should hope so,” Hongjoong replied, lighthearted though thick. “Someone has to make sure you don’t crash.”

“I hypered inside a hangar!”

“Maybe I’m more done with space than I thought,” Hongjoong chuckled, glancing over at Seonghwa with warm eyes still damp.

Seonghwa laughed quietly, squeezing his hand. “Alright, change of plans- Yunho, we’re coming with you,” he teased, grinning at the other who pretended to celebrate.

“Good riddance!” Wooyoung said, sticking his tongue out. “Now Yeosang and I can be young and wild without the parents breathing down our necks.”

“We will be no such thing,” Yeosang said, muffled by Wooyoung’s chest.

“Young and wild,” Wooyoung assured him, grinning-

Seonghwa turned to Hongjoong to laugh, but he hadn’t even fully turned before Hongjoong pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth, effectively cutting off his train of thought as he pulled back, smiling quietly, though his eyes were full to bursting.

“Thank you,” he murmured, as if he hadn’t just done that in front of everyone.

Seonghwa wanted to check the others’ reactions, but he didn’t look away from Hongjoong, swallowing. “We already agreed that we’d stick together,” he reminded him, face warming.

“Yeah, but I can’t see in your head anymore,” he said, wetting his lips. “I couldn’t be sure you weren’t lying.”

“Wow.” Seonghwa blinked. “That stings.”

Hongjoong laughed, hitting his chest with a gentle fist. “Don’t be an ass.”

“You’re the one who apparently thinks I’m a liar!” he laughed.

“You do look like a liar,” Jongho piped up. “It’s your nose.”

“My nose? ” he demanded, whipping around.

Wooyoung was burying his laughter in Yeosang’s neck, who looked torn between discomfort, bliss, and amusement. Yunho nodded sagely. “It’s a liar’s nose.”

“How so?”

“Well, the person who has it is a liar,” San said, shrugging.

“I’m not a liar!”

“Prove it!” San challenged back, slamming his hands on the table, just to be annoying.

“I just did, apparently!” Seonghwa yelled back, head cocking to Hongjoong who was laughing into his hand.

San’s flame flickered out as his shoulders fell. “Oh. Yeah… I guess so,” he sighed, sitting back down. “This game is boring.”

“What game?” Seonghwa demanded, throwing his hands up.

“Getting you couples riled up,” San huffed, laying his head down. “Wooyoung is too shameless, I feel bad doing it to Yeosang, Hongjoong is too sweet, and you’re too whipped.”

Seonghwa wanted to protest that he was not whipped.

But if it was for Hongjoong, then it wasn’t much of an insult, was it?

And maybe he’d been in love with Hongjoong for four years, so maybe he was allowed to be whipped. 

“So… half of us are staying and half are going?” Mingi questioned, glancing around. “Everyone’s okay with that?”

They all nodded, Yeosang slipping from Wooyoung’s headlock to confirm on his own, making Wooyoung pout.

Hongjoong glanced at Seonghwa without answering, eyes dragging over his face slowly, a smile on his lips.

“Yeah,” Hongjoong said without looking away, face practically glowing. “I’m happy with this.”

Seonghwa had to look away, making Hongjoong laugh, because holy shit.

His heart was practically fluttering in his chest, and he was suddenly extremely glad Hongjoong could no longer feel the stupid, blaring panic alarms in his head every time Hongjoong so much as glanced at him.

Hongjoong still squeezed his hand as he laughed.

And Seonghwa revelled in the warmth that connected the two of them. Maybe it wasn’t a psychological link…

But fuck if it wasn’t more than enough.

Hongjoong would always be enough, he had realized. 

~~~~~~~~~~

“34 degrees port.”

“Already enacted.”

“Asteroid field approaching on the starboard.”

“Tracking.”

“Picking up scans of a sexy creature to my right-“

“ Wooyoung. ”  

He winced, spinning in his chair slowly to smile at Eden innocently. “Sir?”

Eden narrowed his eyes, though Wooyoung could absolutely see how hard it was for him not to laugh. “We talked about this.”

“I stopped calling him a cutie!” Wooyoung defended, feeling Yeosang’s glare burning into his temple.

“Wooyoung.”

“I’m not missing any important readings,” Wooyoung excused, crossing his arms.

“You’re harassing your co-pilot,” he replied dryly.

“I’m complimenting my boyfriend,” he corrected pointedly, holding up a finger. “It’s not my fault that you expect me to be on a twelve-hour shift and not start getting antsy.”

“I’m not worried about you getting antsy,” Eden sighed, rubbing his forehead, “I’m worried about you jumping your co-pilot over the console.”

“I’m professional !” Wooyoung cried, placing a hand to his chest, mouth agape. “I would never do that-“

“Yes, you would.”

“-while other crew members were present!” Wooyoung finished, making Eden finally glare at him.

“Wooyoung, there are 13 other people in this room who have to listen to you,” Eden said calmly. “Please, keep your personal comments to yourself.”

Wooyoung huffed, spinning back around. “Aye, sir,” he muttered, shoulders hunched.

He had barely paused a moment before pressing the interpersonal communicator hooked on his ear, hearing it click on.

“I like how your uniform fits-“

“That’s the open channel, Wooyoung,” Eden sighed as Yeosang froze, face coloring.

“Well, stop listening to private conversations!” Wooyoung snapped over his shoulder, sighing and switching channels to his and Yeosang’s personal one. “Anyway, I thought you looked cute this morning-“

“ Wooyoung. ”

“I’m almost done!” Wooyoung groaned, whipping around fully prepared to begin whining-

“Holy shit, can you stop flirting for two seconds?” Hongjoong’s voice suddenly sounded, making Wooyoung shift his chair to view the entrance.

Seonghwa and Hongjoong stood just outside the elevator, both glaring at Wooyoung accusingly.

“You two play footsies under the table!” Wooyoung accused, shamelessly ignoring the fact that the entire room was looking at them, either disgruntled, snorting laughter, or trying to keep composed.

“Oh my stars,” Yeosang hissed, standing and grabbing Wooyoung by the arm, dragging him up violently enough for Wooyoung to yelp. “Our shift is over- get the fuck out,” he hissed, shoving Wooyoung towards the door, making him stumble-

“I’m sorry,” Yeosang murmured, half looking at Eden, who was smiling quietly, eyes understanding as much as they were jokingly chastising.

“Just… make sure his communicator is off before anything happens,” Eden requested.

Wooyoung glanced back in time to see Yeosang glaring at him murderously, shoving him once more in the back until they were passing Hongjoong and Seonghwa who turned in unison, arms crossed over their chests in identical disappointed parents' stances.

Wooyoung waved. “Have fun, hyungs,” he called as Yeosang kicked him in the back of the legs while shoving him through the door into the elevator,  practically throwing Wooyoung into a wall while he ushered the door to close.

Wooyoung caught sight of all three on the deck laughing while Yeosang curled over the ‘close door’ button as they were shut off and began their ascent.

He waited, but Yeosang was just breathing, fanning his face and curling over to hide his face with his hair (which was still shoulder length, but had been trimmed and styled into something that Wooyoung had very quickly found irresistible).

There was a tension in his shoulders, and Wooyoung was entirely sure that it wasn’t hurt feelings. He and Yeosang had been playing this game for a little while now, and Wooyoung knew where the lines were drawn.

“I can’t tell,” he said after a solid few seconds of Yeosang not moving, “whether you’re about to jump me… or punch me.”

“Don’t give me ideas,” Yeosang replied quietly, straightening and breathing out, his face a bit more naturally pale and his stance more confident as he turned to Wooyoung with another murderous glare. “When will you stop being a headass?” he asked breathlessly, looking like he’d been fighting, rather than being complimented.

Wooyoung shrugged, smiling. “When Eden finally understands that I can’t just go 12 hours without talking to you.”

“You weren’t talking to me, you were flirting ,” Yeosang hissed, looking scandalized. “And then you fought him-“

“He knows I respect him enough to fight him.”

“And you just kept making it so obvious- “

“Why would I do it if I was gonna be quiet about it?” he questioned, eyebrow cocking.

“You said you would take me over the console ,” He hissed.

“With no one there,” Wooyoung reminded him. “What? Would you not be into that?”

“No!”

“Alright, then, the command room is off the table,” he complied easily, hands up in surrender. “What about the cafeteria?”

“Wooyoung-“

“Uniform storage closet?”

“ Wooyoung! ”

“Observation deck?”

Yeosang choked, drawing back into himself as his face flooded red-

“Holy shit,” Wooyoung said, eyes widening and mouth dropping. “Holy shit- Do you want to fuck on the observation deck?”

The elevator door opened and Yeosang bolted through it, sending Wooyoung into a fit of laughter after him, holding his stomach as Yeosang made a beeline for their room, ignoring Wooyoung’s laughter-shaking voice calling his name.

The door didn’t have a chance to close between them as Wooyoung slipped in. The only problem with his escape is that now Yeosang was in their shared space and had nowhere else to run.

So he immediately moved towards the dresser to grab his sleep clothes-

“Yeosang,” Wooyoung said, finally suppressing laughter as he caught his wrist, spinning him around with enough ease to know that Yeosang wasn’t fighting him, even if he kept his head down and eyes averted.

Wooyoung chuckled, releasing his hand and bringing both palms to cup his cheeks that he could feel the heat of, lifting his head with little resistance until Yeosang looked up at him, lips a bit smooshed from the hold.

Wooyoung grinned, bringing their faces close enough that their noses brushed. “I’m kidding,” he chuckled, brushing thumbs over his cheeks, his eyes still pointedly annoyed. “If you’re not into fucking on the observation deck, I was kidding.”

He paused.

“Unless you are actually into it, in which case, we can talk about-“

Yeosang huffed darkly enough for Wooyoung to stop, smiling as he pressed their foreheads together.

For whatever reason, Yeosang’s hesitancies and embarrassment seemed to be inversely proportional to how close Wooyoung was. Somehow, proximity seemed to be something that calmed him, even when it was Wooyoung that was causing him all his grief.

So when their foreheads touched, Yeosang closed his eyes, a quiet breath leaving and some of the tension melting from his shoulders.  

“I’m sorry I teased you,” Wooyoung said, smiling as he rocked them gently. “But I meant every word of it.”

Yeosang sighed again, keeping his eyes closed stubbornly. “Wooyoung… You’re an asshole.”

“Yeah, but you still kiss me goodnight every night, so how do you expect me to learn from that sort of reinforcement?” he teased, touching their noses for a moment.

Yeosang’s lips twisted in a way that showed he was keeping back some sort of retort, but Wooyoung would have honestly loved to have heard it.

“Okay, I’m done teasing,” Wooyoung promised, still unable to stem his smile as he dropped Yeosang’s cheeks and looped his arms around his waist instead, like they were about to start slow dancing. “Now what?” he questioned innocently.

Yeosang opened his eyes and stared at him, still apathetically unamused.

But Wooyoung just traced his eyes over every inch of the face that he had committed time to learning- everything from the scar on his cheek that looked like it might have been stitches when he was younger, to the smudges by his eyes, to the little almost-pout his lips would form into when he was trying not to show just how excited he was.

But Wooyoung had learned to read what he felt in the spark of his eyes.

“Now, I’m either going to kick you in the dick or kiss you,” Yeosang huffed, leaning more heavily into Wooyoung, the weight of the 12 hour shift laying across them. “Haven’t decided yet.”

“May I provide a sample of one?” Wooyoung teased.

Yeosang pulled back to look him in the eyes. “You’ll let me kick you lightly in the dick?”

Wooyoung pushed his lips out- halfway between a pout and a plea.

Yeosang rolled his eyes, his lips pushing into that pout that always came when he was trying to be mad but wanted to smile.

Wooyoung’s favorite moment was when Yeosang smiled. And it had been that way for the past six months.  

“You can give one free sample,” Yeosang sighed, as if put upon, but Wooyoung watched the moment he cracked, lips parting in a smile that was warm but sparked with just enough mischievousness-

Wooyoung prided himself on being part of the reason that was there.

-Just enough mischievousness to have Wooyoung seriously questioning whether or not he was down for fucking in the observation deck.

And really, Yeosang should have known that giving Wooyoung permission for a sample was basically just signing away his evening.

Excitement and longing warmed his blood as he trailed a hand up, threading through the long hair at the back of Yeosang’s skull, simply massaging through the strands for a moment, scratching his nails along his scalp.

And Wooyoung could probably get off on watching Yeosang’s eyes flutter shut, tilting his head back without thinking and humming quietly, shoulders falling as gentle shivers ran down his spine at the stimulation.

And no, it wasn’t some weird sexual thing, Wooyoung just really, really fucking liked being able to make Yeosang relax like this. He smiled as his nails scratched up the back of his neck, reaching the top before skating down the side of his temple, making his head tilt and lips part.

They may love this job, but the shifts were hell on your muscles.

Yeosang swallowed, still keeping his eyes closed, voice quiet and relaxed. “What about… the kiss?” he questioned, cracking one eye open.

Wooyoung grinned, his other hand pressing a warm palm to the small of Yeosang’s back, feeling the way he pushed back into it like a heating pad. “I dunno,” He said quietly, his hand slowing. “I sort of just want to give you a massage and watch you fall asleep, at this point,” he confessed, watching the way Yeosang’s lips twitched.

“I won’t ever say no to that,” he chuckled quietly, low voice rumbling in his chest enough for Wooyoung to feel it in his. “But this is sort of your last chance… before you put me to sleep.”

Wooyoung sighed, letting his hand drop to Yeosang’s neck, holding it gently as he frowned. “Fine,” He sighed quietly, the hand at his back wrapping around his neck to hold them chest to chest. “But only because it’s just a shame if you lose out on free samples.”

Yeosang chuckled, the sound smothered by Wooyoung finally kissing him, the angle sending it deep and warm as Yeosang’s lips parted welcomingly, warm tongues brushing that made Wooyoung’s skin shiver and his toes curl as Yeosang held onto his arm gently.

There was no better time to kiss Yeosang than when he was relaxed. Wooyoung’s prime hunting time was right before sleeping and right after waking up- when Yeosang was too comfortable and sleepy to get embarrassed or anxious about whatever things made him pull away and hide his face.

One of Yeosang’s hand cupped the back of Wooyoung’s head, keeping him in place as they bent slightly, Yeosang smiling quietly against his lips.

For the sake of their aching backs and feet, Wooyoung shuffled them backwards until they hitting the bed and he was slowly lowering Yeosang’s back onto it, crawling up until he straddled his legs and planting his elbows on either side of his head before reconnecting their lips after only a moment’s break.

“That’s- a big- sample,” Yeosang breathed between kisses, making Wooyoung laugh, a sun exploding in his chest as he stared down at Yeosang.

Yeosang had once said that he didn’t know how to articulate his feelings. He didn’t know how to show Wooyoung how much he meant. Wooyoung told him to smile to let him know it was okay, and he spent every day holding each of Yeosang’s smiles like little candles that lit their path.

But he’d been worried, that maybe Yeosang would be harder to read than Wooyoung thought, if he was good at acting, if he instinctively hid his emotions-

Wooyoung didn’t know how he’d ever been worried.

How could he ever be confused when he looked down at Yeosang and saw enough love in his eyes to make Wooyoung want to break down?

Even when Wooyoung knew he was loved by Yeosang, even he had never anticipated ever being loved this much by someone. The sort of love that shone and gave warmth for him to bask in, that spilled over Yeosang’s cheeks when it couldn’t be contained, that turned Yeosang’s usually sharp eyes into soft puddles of goo that were all for Wooyoung-

Wooyoung had never seen someone wear love as openly as Yeosang, and sometimes it caught him in the chest that it was for him.

“Okay, free trial’s over,” Wooyoung chuckled, brushing hair from Yeosang’s forehead, sure that his smile was stupid and loopy. “Make your choice.”

Yeosang chuckled, brushing a palm against Wooyoung’s cheek. “Would you actually let me kick you in the dick?” he questioned, voice shaking with laughter.

Yeosang was relaxed beneath Wooyoung, eyes soft and muscles loose and not a single hesitation in sight- which made Wooyoung pretty sure he’d let Yeosang stab him in the chest and not complain.

Wooyoung put on his best pleading face. “I mean…. If you really want to…” He fluttered his eyelashes. “If you really want to hurt me… I guess… I have no choice…”

Yeosang laughed, eyes scrunching as he ran a hand through Wooyoung’s hair slowly. “You’re so shameless,” he murmured warmly, eyes flickering across his face slowly.

He suddenly smiled slowly.

“What if we just do a gentle kick,” He murmured, making Wooyoung’s eyes widen as his leg shifted beneath Wooyoung. “Just like-“

Wooyoung honest to God braced himself for a strike to his most vulnerable zone. But the only thing he felt was Yeosang’s thigh lifting and slotting itself with almost practiced ease up against the little… uh… problem that Wooyoung hadn’t noticed becoming a thing.

And Wooyoung wasn’t someone who was excessively sensitive. But it was Yeosang and it was the last thing he was expecting, so when he dropped completely, his head hitting Yeosang’s chest as electricity shot up his spine and his arms gave out.

The cherry on top was the wanton moan that got muffled by Yeosang’s chest and the fact that Yeosang was currently laughing so hard, Wooyoung could feel his entire body shaking with it.

“Stop it,” he whined, lifting himself again, glaring at Yeosang’s leg before turning his eyes onto the man himself whose eyes were sparking with laughter. “And you call me mean.”

“Don’t like it’s not the biggest turn on to you when I get confident,” he murmured, brushing at Wooyoung’s hair.

“Yeah, but don’t start something you don’t wanna finish,” Wooyoung huffed, glaring down at him and resisting the urge to kiss him again.  

Yeosang lifted himself up on his elbows suddenly, so close in a moment that their lips brushed, smiling gently. “Who said I wasn’t going to finish it?” he murmured lowly. 

“Oh my God, I think I love you more every fucking day,” Wooyoung breathed, sealing their lips together as his heart danced in his chest.

Yeosang parted, their breaths mingling as his eyes shone comfortably. “Exponentially speaking, that’s a lot of love growth.”

Wooyoung felt like his heart was going to snap in two.

“You’re damn fucking right it is,” he breathed, kissing Yeosang again before he could let the pressure behind his eyes fall.

Sometimes, it terrified Wooyoung how much he felt like loving Yeosang was simultaneously killing him and giving him a reason to get up every day.

And sometimes it terrified him just how much he saw that sentiment mirrored in Yeosang’s eyes that he would find looking at him during the down moments of the shift.

Far away eyes that stared at Wooyoung with a ghost of a smile that wouldn’t disappear until he realized that Wooyoung was looking, and then he curled up like a roly-poly hiding from danger.

Lingering touches that wouldn’t leave entirely unless both hands were occupied. The fact that Yeosang didn’t shove him off when Wooyoung flopped on top of him, intending to make a joke but finding himself too comfortable to move until they fell asleep like that.

The fact that Yeosang would shift closer in the night, into Wooyoung’s arms, and place them securely around himself.

The fact that he could keep up with Wooyoung- touch for touch- while they were racing through dying stars that appeared in their paths, their piloting echoing each other by milliseconds, as if they were still connected via brainwaves.

Eden asked them about it. The two of them, and their two hyungs… no one on the ship had ever seen two pairs who worked as flawlessly together.

Wooyoung just grinned, threw an arm around Yeosang, and told Eden that they’d spent a lot of time learning to trust each other implicitly. Eden had hummed and suggested good naturedly that he get implants for his own men, if it improved performance that much.

Yeosang’s love came in the eyes that always woke up before Wooyoung and that he’d find staring sleepily at him while Yeosang stroked his hair gently, too tired to be embarrassed when Wooyoung laughed and asked what he was doing.

Wooyoung found himself loving every part of Yeosang more and more and more. He’d think that there was no possible way his life could get any better, and that would be true until the next time Yeosang would smile… and Wooyoung would understand that he was loved.

They’d dated for five months without going beyond some rather intense kissing in the secrecy of their bedroom and a little bit more involved activities that Yeosang had been a bit scandalized by, but enjoyed nonetheless.

And there was nothing more intoxicating than watching Yeosang grow comfortable with Wooyoung.

Maybe in the command room, in the cafeteria, on every other place on the ship- Yeosang wouldn’t let Wooyoung breathe near him, much less touch him.

But in their quarters? On their breaks where they’d go back for a quick nap? During their nights spent together where there was nowhere to be for another ten hours?

Watching Yeosang slowly accept the touches, ask for the touches, and then finally… initiate the touches. Watching him smirk and tease where he had flushed and hesitated. Watching him… have fun while he loved Wooyoung.

That was the most brilliant thing Wooyoung could think of.

“If you keep telling me all these bold declarations of love,” Yeosang breathed into the space between their lips, his hands placed gently against Wooyoung’s chest, fingertips digging in gently, “I may start to believe them.”

Wooyoung paused, staring into deep eyes that stared at him like he hung the stars.

And Wooyoung prayed every day that he didn’t let them down.

“Do you believe it?” Wooyoung whispered, cupping his cheek gently, brushing a thumb over his cheek.

Yeosang’s eyes shimmered, but it was with light, not tears. Both his hands reached up, cupping Wooyoung’s face firmly. “I do.”

“Then what’s the problem?” he questioned gently.

Yeosang stared for a moment, as if gathering his thoughts as he leaned up, pressing a kiss to Wooyoung’s mouth, warm enough to have him closing his eyes, savoring the sensation.

“Because now I feel like it’s a competition to show that I love you more,” Yeosang chuckled lowly, neither of them breaking the quiet that had fallen around them.

Wooyoung smiled. “So it’s a competition now?”

“Well, now I feel like I have to show you how like… my love grows and shit like that,” He muttered, glancing away for a brief moment as his cheeks turned the barest shade of pink.

Wooyoung felt like his heart would explode.

When he was young, he was sure the aches in his heart would only be from rejection and loneliness.

But Wooyoung’s heart ached for how full it was as he leaned his head against Yeosang’s, their noses brushing. “Smile for me?” he whispered, his own lips twitching uncontrollably.

Yeosang no longer looked surprised by the request. Instead, he merely gave an almost exasperated look, as if Wooyoung should already know.

But Wooyoung waited, brushing thumbs over Yeosang’s neck and cheeks and hair.

And when Yeosang smiled at him, it was genuine and warm and almost a little too bright for Wooyoung’s poor heart. It was a smile that reached into his soul and pulled out all the little pieces of love he hadn’t ever learned to articulate.

And Wooyoung marveled at them all.

“Absolutely perfect,” he breathed against Yeosang’s lips.

“Do you have any idea…” Yeosang stopped, like he had suddenly run out of gas.

Wooyoung waited, fingers playing idly with the tips of his hair. Yeosang had gotten better at being comfortable with explicit touches and physical shows of affection, but most of the more heartfelt words remained locked away.

Speaking was still something he struggled with, even if he was more verbally affectionate than ever. It took more effort and more courage for him to articulate it than to show it. And Wooyoung never forced him to say what he already knew in his heart.

But Yeosang looked determined as he stared up into Wooyoung’s eyes.

“Do you have any idea… everything you’ve done for me?” he asked roughly, voice low and quiet.

Wooyoung smiled, despite the way his heart flipped. “I have a few ideas,” he admitted, dragging a hand along his face to brush the hair away. “But I don’t think it’s actually possible for us to really know everything we’ve done for each other.”

Even having resided in Wooyoung’s head…. He didn’t think it was really possible for the experiences that they had gone through and the lives that they had led… it was impossible to truly understand what slowly fixing those experiences did to a person.

What they had done to each other. 

Wooyoung knew that Yeosang had lived a lonely life, signing himself away to science with nowhere else to go, underwent years of basically psychological torture, was torn from that situation and thrown into a fire fight, and was now laying in bed- safe and happy and healing.

Wooyoung had lived a life full of trying to get revenge, to get even, to get back at the people who kept pushing him away. He’d run away, nearly rejected the one person who was able to understand him, learned to care a little too much, ran away again, had the shit scared out of him over and over…

And now he was living a life filled with more love than he’d ever counted on feeling.

And not just from Yeosang. Hongjoong and Seonghwa were overbearing, but there was a reason they teased them with the title of parents. Yunho and San video called almost every week, and Jongho and Mingi sent them funny photos from whatever attraction they had recently seen in the big city or small country road.

Hell, even Eden put up with their bullshit with nothing more than a roll of his eyes, a smirk on his lips, and a declaration that one day he’d manage to train Wooyoung.

(To which Wooyoung would respond with a less than professional comment, which made Yeosang once stab him with a fork in the cafeteria.)

The bottom line… was that Wooyoung didn’t think it was possible to truly understand the depths to which he had helped Yeosang and changed his life.

But when he looked at Yeosang and found him already looking, and there was a moment of the two of them simply acknowledging each other as a part of their lives that they were infinitely grateful for… he had a pretty good guess.

If it was even a fraction of what Yeosang did for Wooyoung… then it was physically impossible to encompass everything he was to him.

But Wooyoung knew, even if he didn’t understand.

He pressed their foreheads together, kissing the corner of Yeosang’s mouth gently. “I’m going to spend the rest of my life loving you, Yeosang.”

 It was a declaration as much as it was a promise. And Wooyoung watched Yeosang’s eyes do that thing where they stared like Wooyoung was something unreal, awed and warm and fond and misty with emotions he hadn’t been allowed to feel for so long.

Six months had felt like forever already. But Wooyoung wanted a million more forevers with Yeosang.

He sealed their lips together, Yeosang melting into his touch as Wooyoung let their hearts beat together.

“I love you so fucking much,” Yeosang managed in between kisses, in a rush, like he didn’t want to lose his confidence.

Wooyoung felt the smile curving against his lips like a promise.

“I know,” he promised back, listening to Yeosang laugh quietly.

The only thing more addicting than loving Yeosang… was knowing Yeosang loved him back.

~~~~~~~~

Flying with Hongjoong… was like constantly flying at a million hytas an hour.

Exhilarating, exciting, terrifying… and more than a little addicting when you finally got the feel for it. 

Seonghwa could recall watching Yeosang and Wooyoung fly- more audible then when they were AI and human, but just as smooth- working as quickly as a human mind and mouth were able to process and relay information.

Seonghwa understood Yeosang’s statement- “I liked flying with you”- infinitely more now. Because Seonghwa had loved flying the cruisers that were speedy, sleek, and responded with a mere touch.

Working with Hongjoong was like working on a cruiser on steroids- as if every shift and mumble from Seonghwa were enough to completely change their direction where he wanted it.

They responded to each other like they were still connected by every thought. 

And it also helped that the only things they really dealt with on the Horizon were space anomalies, rather than going out and fighting enemy cruisers getting too close. Their only job was making sure they didn’t hit any planets, and the occasional frantic flight through a lightning storm when their machines were fried and Hongjoong was under the console holding two pieces of wiring together so that Seonghwa could get them out without exploding their crystals.

Like he said, exhilarating.

And more than a little intoxicating when they were safe and Hongjoong stood up, a little shaky but eyes blazing with adrenaline and the thrill of success. 

It was never harder not to kiss Hongjoong than in those moments. 

But most days, it was days like this one, where it was just a shift of them cruising along, making sure nothing was fucking with their sensors as they made their way through the endless beauty of space.

And gossiped.

“You heard Yunho got a concussion?” Hongjoong asked without looking up from his screen, glancing through a reading from the science station about the rock they just took in that had scratched their outer hull a bit.

“Seriously?” Seonghwa snorted quietly, easing them back on course after avoiding a weird magnetic spot in front of them. “What did he do this time?”

“San bet him he couldn’t ride a hoverbike over some railing on a bridge, and Yunho busted his head on the way down. He’ll live,” he assured him, a grin in his voice. “But his family apparently isn’t thrilled in this being their third emergency room visit this month for the two of them.”

“Those two are bad for each other,” Seonghwa chuckled, shaking his head. “They’re too impulsive and prideful. I bet San would eat barbed wire if Yunho bet him ten credits he couldn’t.”

Hongjoong covered his mouth to hold in the snort, glancing at Seonghwa with a warning glare about making him laugh. “They have fun,” he managed, voice shaking.

“Jongho officially confirmed that he and Mingi are going to be staying with his parents until the next winter holidays,” Seonghwa informed him, checking their bearing once more. “After that, they’re going to re-discuss their next move.”

“Are they still thinking about going into the general space corp?” he questioned, glancing over curiously.

“That’s still their plan, if they do come back. Mingi mentioned maybe taking one more trip back to his planet. They’re waiting it out.”

“Interesting,” Hongjoong hummed.

“As thrilling as the gossip is, can I have an update on our course?” Eden questioned, a smile in his voice and when Seonghwa glanced back, he was smirking over his fist that his chin rested on.

Rather than the blatant flirting and rather unprofessional comments that came from Wooyoung (bless Yeosang’s soul), Hongjoong and Seonghwa were more scolded for talking about anything that wasn’t work.

But, unlike Wooyoung’s comments, Seonghwa knew the rest of the command room was listening to their conversation with their ears on high alert, especially when other members of the crew were mentioned.

(Like that asshat down in engineering who always gave Seonghwa hell when he needed something updated on the console. Like it was Seonghwa’s fucking fault the guy refused to upgrade automatically rather than manually.)

“You know that it would be so boring without us,” Hongjoong assured him, grinning, but swiping across his screen to send the info to Eden’s pad. “We’re set to be passing the Yunal system in about four hours. Right on schedule.”

Eden hummed, leaning back in his chair. “Maybe I preferred it when it was boring,” he sighed. “As much as I love the updates, if I have to hear Wooyoung whispering about Yeosang’s ass through the communicator one more time-“

“It’s because you don’t actually punish him,” Seonghwa chuckled, turning in his chair for a moment. “You practically enable him.”

“I’ve tried publicly shaming him,” he assured them, lifting his hands helplessly. “But Wooyoung is too shameless and I feel too bad for Yeosang.” He winced. “Lord knows how the two of them work.” He sighed heavily. “But damn if they aren’t good pilots.”

Hongjoong chuckled, shaking his head. “You’re compromising everything for a few good pilots.”

“You didn’t see the guy I had before you four showed up,” Eden sighed, rubbing at his eyes. “He couldn’t dodge an asteroid the size of a planet.” He grinned, eyes warm. “Good help was always impossible after Maddox.” 

Maddox had been someone Seonghwa heard in passing conversation, but never in much depth. Just vague mentions like this. But he glanced at Hongjoong and found him grinning.

“How do I hold up, chief?” he questioned, crossing his eyes with a warning look.

Eden chuckled, waving a hand. “You hold up just fine, kid. Now finish the last five minutes of your shift so I can stop looking at you.”

“One direct route into a dying star, coming up.”

Someone over by navigations snorted, sobering when Eden looked their way.

Seonghwa… liked working on the Horizon. 

Outside of all the baggage and the past and the reasons they were here- it was a great place with competent people and a great captain. Seonghwa didn’t find himself longing for something different, and he was more than pleased to see that Hongjoong…

Well, Hongjoong was happy.

And maybe it was a bit of a low bar after everything, but all Seonghwa knew was that he woke up beside Hongjoong and would shake him awake when it was time, and Hongjoong would smile at him and pull him down for a kiss, no matter how much Seonghwa insisted they didn’t have time.

(There was one horrendously embarrassing incident where they ended up being late to the shift change, barely put together, and to top it all off, it was the shift they switched with Yeosang and Wooyoung so the two of them hadn’t lived that one down for weeks.)

But Hongjoong was happy and the number of times he had woken up in the night with nightmares had decreased rapidly over time, Seonghwa being shaken awake less and less to either tears and a numb sort of fear that had Hongjoong crawling into his arms and staying there until morning came, not even shifting.

And the other best part? Seonghwa was happy, too.

He felt at peace here. He felt like he had carved a place for himself. 

He had friends who called them often, he had support at his fingertips in the form of 3AM coffee runs with Wooyoung or Yeosang when the insomnia or nights hit a little too hard. He had work that he enjoyed and people he worked with who were pleasant and skilled.

He had a routine, a goal, and a future. And Hongjoong.

They left when the next shift came to relieve them, both of them saluting to Eden before leaving, the captain calling after them to not cause too much trouble before he saw them next.

Seonghwa stretched his arms over his head, waiting for the elevator to bring them to the cafeteria so they could actually eat a proper meal. Hongjoong bent over, touching his toes and groaning pleasantly when his back cracked, making Seonghwa laugh with jealousy.

“Any idea what Yeosang and Wooyoung are up to?” he questioned when they stepped out together, strolling down leisurely.

Seonghwa actually found the moments just after their shifts to be the most peaceful. When they were both a good amount of tired, but on that sort of high of finally being able to relax together, making their way to eat, knowing they could sleep for the next 24 hours together.

“Probably sleeping,” Hongjoong noted, shrugging. “Or fucking. They were pretty up front the last couple of days, I’m not surprised if Wooyoung was feeling steamy.”

“We give Wooyoung a lot of shit,” Seonghwa chuckled as they entered the cafeteria and grabbed some trays. “But have you seen Yeosang when he gets bold enough to undress him with his eyes?” He shuddered slightly.

Hongjoong laughed, swatting at him. “Okay, I’m done talking about their sex life.”

“Yes,” Seonghwa agreed, chuckling. “Let’s talk about ours instead.”

Hongjoong looked at him, bewildered as he grabbed some rice. “What about our sex life?” he demanded, looking on the verge of laughing again. “What- you want something spicier?”

“I was just trying to transition the conversation,” Seonghwa said, shaking his head quickly. “Our sex life is fine.”

“Well, I know it’s fine , but that doesn’t mean you can’t spice it up, if you want.”

“I don’t want.”

Hongjoong huffed, rolling his eyes. “Wimp.”

“Says the one who can’t eat a medium spicy stew,” Seonghwa said, giving him a pointed look as they took a seat in the far corner, sitting across from each other away from the smaller groups scattered around.

As Hongjoong crossed in front of him, he saw the slightly raised skin at the back of his neck where their connection used to be. 

Being lonely inside his head has been… easier to acclimate to than he anticipated. Mostly because, looking back, he had so many people on the outside. 

Hongjoong was next to him. And that made losing his mind a little easier. 

“Spicy bedroom is better than spicy food,” Hongjoong huffed, pushing his lips around as he stirred his food around. “Spicy bedroom doesn’t burn for hours.”

“Wait until you actually discover BDSM,” Seonghwa snickered, watching Hongjoong stare at him in a mix of curiosity and offense. “Okay, can we stop talking about sex in the middle of the meal?” he asked, rubbing at his eyes. “I hear enough from Wooyoung.”

Hongjoong laughed, leaning back a bit as he adjusted his seat before beginning to eat.

The meal was spent in a good amount of silence, only broken up by their occasional chatting about the others or what had happened during the shift. 

They were both a little too tired for a very animated conversation, but Seonghwa still found himself smiling the whole time, watching Hongjoong explain the weird reading he had gotten a few hours ago more in depth.

Seonghwa just watched him, not having spoken for the last ten minutes, but not minding in the slightest. He wasn’t throwing his hands around, but his eyes were bright with excitement and curiosity. 

Hongjoong was still his father’s son, and he was still brilliant. He was still the boy who loved to help with experiments and learn everything there was to learn. 

He was still full to the brim with knowledge and understanding of things Seonghwa could barely grasp the concepts of, and whereas Seonghwa read his scanners, looking for dangers or things of interest…

Hongjoong and his beautiful mind read the scanners and read everything. He looked at, dissected, examined, and ranted about each substance found and what it might be useful for.

Wooyoung called him a nerd.

Seonghwa just marveled at him. He’d never been all that into science- math was fine, but science always lost him once it got past a certain point. But Hongjoong, he could listen to for hours, talking about something he stopped being able to follow five minutes ago.

And Hongjoong…. 

Seonghwa didn’t know of how his father's actions had tainted science and the life he’d loved before. His curiosity was now mingled with the feeling of violation, his eagerness with mania. 

And watching Hongjoong begin to love science and learning and intrigue…. was a beautiful sight to see in slow motion. 

“-and can you imagine what would happen if we actually managed to turn star dust into fuel?” he demanded, subdued from the shift, but bright in his eyes. “Do you understand how many stars there are? How many die every minute? That sort of fuel source could absolutely change everything- “

Hongjoong paused suddenly, his hands lowering to the table as he frowned at Seonghwa.

“What?” he questioned, wiping at his mouth like there might have been some food stuck there. He dropped the hand quickly, though, suppressing a smile of exasperation as he leaned forward. “You’re doing it again.”

Seonghwa lifted an innocent eyebrow. “Doing what?” he asked casually, still staring at Hongjoong.

“Looking at me like you want to sweep me off my feet.” Hongjoong rolled his eyes, though they sparked as he took another pointed bite of food.

“Maybe I do,” Seonghwa said quietly, leaning on his hands, eyes dragging over Hongjoong’s amused face slowly. “Ever thought of that?”

Ever thought of how beautiful you are? 

“You already did,” Hongjoong reminded him around a bite. “Remember? You ran through a ship with me. And a forest. And another ship.”

“You were unconscious all three of those times,” Seonghwa laughed, skin warming as his blood heated pleasantly. “Should I do it now?”

“You already throw me onto the bed any chance you get,” Hongjoong sighed, chuckling. “Isn’t that close enough?”

“It’s not my fault, you’re pocket sized,” Seonghwa said helplessly, dodging a piece of food expertly. “You’re small. Petite. Tiny.”

“ Stop, ” Hongjoong begged, dropping his head and laughing weakly. “Stop, I’m not tiny-“

“I could fit you in the palm of my hand,” Seonghwa continued, watching how Hongjoong’s ears colored. “A little baby. I just want to kiss your forehead and squish your cheeks-“

“You do that anyway!” Hongjoong fought, glaring. “Stop teasing me,” he huffed, filling his mouth with food as protest.

“Or what?” Seonghwa challenged, leaning his arms on the table to get closer, grinning.

Hongjoong glared at him, swallowing as he lifted himself up as well, getting a bit closer than Seonghwa imagined he would. “Or I might just have to kiss you,” he said quietly, eyes flickering down to Seonghwa’s lips briefly.

Seonghwa smiled wider, tilting his head. “What’s stopping you?”

“Public decency.”

“Boring,” he chuckled, glancing over Hongjoong’s face slowly. He was stunningly bright and happy. Seonghwa’s expression softened. “I’m happy when you’re happy,” he said quietly.

Hongjoong blinked, taken aback for a moment at the phrase that Seonghwa had said many times before, but he dropped his head weakly, groaning. “I hate you,” he muttered quietly before popping back up and kissing Seonghwa firmly.

It was a tame kiss- not too obvious to those around each other, but it was definitely more than a quick peck as Seonghwa smiled against his lips, heart tap dancing in his chest as he was once more faced with the fact that… he really fucking loved Hongjoong.

He really fucking loved him.

And sometimes it scared Seonghwa. It scared him as much as it scared Hongjoong.

 For Hongjoong, it was because he woke up terrified it had all been a dream and he was still going to wake up on a table. And for Seonghwa… it was because he wanted everything and more for Hongjoong, but he knew he couldn’t give it.

Only you could throw your life away… and still think it wasn’t enough. 

Seonghwa wanted to give him everything. To heal every part of him and erase everything he wanted to forget. 

Hongjoong was so, so much better than they had been when they first began on the Horizon . Nightmares had dwindled, emotional outbursts had dropped to zero, and Hongjoong general overall mood and composure had returned where Hongjoong wanted it.

He didn’t think of his father, he wasn’t haunted by his ghost, and he didn’t regret anything they’d done.

But Seonghwa still wanted to give him so much. For now, though… he had to be content with loving Hongjoong every day and knowing that Hongjoong understood that he would give anything for him.

They parted with Hongjoong looking annoyed. “That’s what you get for being sweet, asshole,” he muttered, pushing his finished tray away.

Seonghwa just smiled. “I love you,” he murmured gently, making Hongjoong look up at him.

And even as Hongjoong’s eyes glared, his lips twisted with trying not to smile. “You’re dumb.”

“I love you,” he repeated, still soft and genuine and his smile wide enough to hurt. “I love you so much… I feel like it’s not actually happening half the time.” He swallowed. “And sometimes I hate myself for being too afraid to realize it for four years.” 

Hongjoong’s annoyance faded like water running down a drain, leaving him staring at Seonghwa, a bit surprised by the sudden confession.

Seonghwa just leaned forward a bit. “I don’t think I would have ever known how to love someone aside from you,” he murmured honestly, chest aching with a pleasant warmth. “I don’t think I would have… ever been able to trust them enough like this.” He nodded slowly. “Thank you,” he whispered genuinely.

Because without Hongjoong, not only would Seonghwa still be alone… he’d be afraid. He’d be ashamed. He’d be hiding. He’d believe he was secretly wrong, he’d be afraid of his own choices, he’d still be afraid of love because he had been taught too well that the love was wrong. 

Hongjoong was the reason he was sitting here, now- loved, warm, and happy… and guilt free about it. 

“You really want to have this conversation in the cafeteria?” Hongjoong asked quietly, though his voice was thick with emotions, eyes a bit misty.

Seonghwa shrugged gently. “I’m not ashamed of it.”

And that… felt like the best thing in the world that Seonghwa had ever said.

He was not ashamed. 

“I know that, Seonghwa, but Christ,” he sighed, dropping his head for a moment, rubbing at his forehead.

Hongjoong took a deep breath before looking back up, expression soft in a way that usually led up to him crying, but he kept it back. “I love you more than you can possibly imagine,” he whispered thickly, hand flexing on the table slowly. “And I thank the stars every fucking day I was fortunate enough to ever meet you.”

It was all things they had said before.

But it felt… good to say them again. Like a reminder, a reassurance that nothing had changed and that it never would.

“You saved me from everything that I thought would haunt me the rest of my life,” Hongjoong murmured thickly. “I would have never escaped my father- in life or in death- without you. You made me brave enough to move on, you made me want to leave it behind, not just because I was afraid and wanted to run…” 

He took a breath, reaching for Seonghwa. 

“But because you gave me a future to look forward to.” 

Seonghwa reached across the table, and Hongjoong took his hand without question, standing with them since they were both finished. They crossed around to the same side of the table, taking their trays with them as Seonghwa pressed a soft kiss to Hongjoong’s temple.

The sort of touch-starvedness that Hongjoong  had exhibited before hadn’t completely gone away, but while it was no longer a real need, Hongjoong was still someone who liked physical affection.

It was a comfort and a want, to be close like that, be touched so gently… so lovingly. 

Which was great because Seonghwa was great at giving it, if he did say so himself. And it was still a comfort to be able to hold Hongjoong, even if there wasn’t any danger.

Which is how they ended up in their bed, Seonghwa leaning against the wall with Hongjoong laying between his legs with his back to Seonghwa’s chest, arms linked around him, and Hongjoong practically asleep as Seonghwa simply pressed kisses to the back of his head and neck, running his nose against the sensitive skin of his shoulder visible through his sleeping shift.

This was a wonder, to Seonghwa. 

That loving someone could be so comfortable and easy and warm… Never could he have imagined love being so free of fear. 

He kissed Hongjoong’s neck gently, laughing every time he shivered or jumped when he touched a sensitive spot, a hand slapping Seonghwa playful on occasion when he bit a little too hard or teased a little too much.

Despite it, Hongjoong was practically asleep in his arms, breathing slow and even, though Seonghwa knew he wasn’t asleep yet with his hand stroking over Seonghwa’s absently.

It was a languid, lazy moment, where the two of them weren’t trying to start anything, but didn’t quite want to sleep yet. A haze of between sleeping and waking where the outside world faded away until there was nothing but the two of them.  

He felt Hongjoong suddenly shift slightly, curling to the side so that his ear pressed to Seonghwa’s chest, listening to his heartbeat.

Seonghwa chuckled, petting his hair gently, kissing his temple and cradling his head so he didn’t have to hold it up at all. “You’re too cute,” he murmured, making Hongjoong’s sleepy face pinch in annoyance.

“Stop talking,” he mumbled sleepily. “I can’t hear.”

Seonghwa laughed, making Hongjoong hit him again, but he fell quiet, letting Hongjoong get comfortable, body slowly loosening as he listened to the slow thrum of Seonghwa’s heartbeat. This was Hongjoong’s favorite position and it very quickly became Seonghwa’s, too, because now he could watch Hongjoong slowly relax, his tense expression melting away into a pile of goo in Seonghwa’s arms.

“I… have never felt safer… than when I’m with you,” Hongjoong whispered, eyes still closed and body lax.

Seonghwa paused, staring down at him for a moment before smiling quietly. “I’m glad,” he whispered, petting his hair gently.

“I want… an entire life with you,” he continued quietly into Seonghwa’s shirt, one of his hands curling in the fabric. “Here, on Horizon… but even later… I want to leave here with you, and I want… I want a house in the middle of nowhere. With a stream or something. And I want… I want there to be enough room that we never have to see anyone else.”

Seonghwa’s heart just about cracked in two with want as he hummed. “Is that so?” he breathed quietly, voice thick. “What about the others?”

“They can visit,” Hongjoong agreed quietly, curling his legs up so he rested more heavily against Seonghwa’s chest. “And we can push Wooyoung into the stream.”

Seonghwa chuckled, chest tightening and eyes burning because he wanted it all with Hongjoong.

He’d never dreamed about wanting before. 

“Do you want a farm?” he asked quietly, stroking his hair gently. “Animals? Crops?”

Hongjoong nodded with an affirming, sleepy hum. “I don’t want to have to leave, ever.”

“What about vacations?” he questioned, imagining for a moment…

He imagined having a big house. Maybe a bit like the one Wooyoung had lived in. Miles of land and no one but… the two of them. Just them, their land… and the others to keep them company on the weekends.

“We’ll travel all the time,” Hongjoong dreamed, nodding slowly. “And just use the house as a base.”

“Travel the galaxy or the planet?” he indulged, feeling his own excitement grow as love and every other sickeningly warm emotion clogged his throat.

Hongjoong had spent so long being chained down, controlled, violated…

Seonghwa would ensure that he never got tied down again. That he’d always have the freedom of where he wanted to go. 

He’d never be trapped again. 

Hongjoong hummed. “You can choose,” he murmured, lifting himself until his head nuzzled beneath Seonghwa’s chin. “Maybe both.”

Seonghwa chuckled, indulging and  imaginative even as tears blurred his vision as he pressed a kiss to Hongjoong’s head. “We can travel it all,” he promised, wrapping arms around him tighter, holding him flush against him so tight that Hongjoong laughed, rubbing his face into Seonghwa’s collar bones.

Hongjoong’s hand landed at Seonghwa’s hip, squeezing gently. “I’m happy… that you don’t feel alone anymore,” he whispered, voice also thick as he tilted his head, kissing Seonghwa’s jaw gently.

A tear hit Hongjoong’s temple as Seonghwa smiled, nodding. “Me, too,” he whispered. “We’re never be lonely again, right?” he laughed weakly.

Hongjoong nodded along, pulling away enough to show Seonghwa the shimmering light in his eyes. “I never thought I’d feel safe. Or happy. Or free…” He swallowed. “I want to keep being all those things with you.”

“You will be,” Seonghwa swore, brushing through Hongjoong’s hair and brushing his cheek, heart full to bursting as every emotion spilled over Hongjoong’s cheeks.

They had both been so alone… but Seonghwa was so fucking happy.

He was happy and in love and Hongjoong was free.

Maybe it wasn’t everything… but it was enough to give for now. 

“We’ll go wherever you want, and we’ll go together, and we’ll make enough memories to make up for everything we lost,” Seonghwa promised, watching Hongjoong nod quickly against his hand, more tears squeezing out.

“I love you,” Hongjoong breathed before lunging up to kiss Seonghwa, nearly missing, which made them break down into laughter as they finally slotted their lips together, warm and deep and enough to make Seonghwa want to tuck Hongjoong away and just lay forever with him.

Hongjoong was the first person Seonghwa loved.

And he was special beyond any belief.

And Seonghwa felt something in his chest click into place every time Hongjoong reminded him that Seonghwa was the first person that Hongjoong had loved…. And had been loved back from.

They weren’t alone anymore.

Seonghwa laid them down, hovering over Hongjoong for a moment, kissing and responding when Hongjoong tugged him closer, warm tongue dancing for a moment before they parted so Seonghwa could lay down beside him.

Without a word, Hongjoong slid into his arms, tucked beneath his chin and kissing his neck languidly, both of them a bit too tired for much more.

“I’m happy, Seonghwa,” he whispered hoarsely, arms right around him, trembling. “I can’t even describe it- I love you so much, I’m so fucking happy-“ 

Seonghwa just held him tightly, closing his eyes and feeling their hearts beating together.

“I’ll always be here,” he promised, murmured into Hongjoong’s ear. “I’ll always love you.”

Hongjoong paused, swallowing, before placing one last kiss. “I know,” he whispered against Seonghwa’s skin. “And I can’t fucking wait to watch it all,” he breathed thickly.

Hongjoong relaxed in Seonghwa’s arms, his head slipping down to his chest.

They rested there, together. In bliss and peace. 

Seonghwa held him in the darkness, not believing for a moment that he was alone as Hongjoong sighed quietly.

His heart beat for Hongjoong to listen to. 

And Hongjoong slept to it, anticipating a forever that they planned to build.

Safe, warm, loving… and human.

They weren’t alone anymore.

They’d never be alone again. 

Seonghwa slept to the sound of Hongjoong breathing, and Hongjoong slept to the sound of their hearts beating as one.

Seonghwa’s planet had convinced him he’d never be loved. 

Hongjoong’s father convinced him he’d never be free. 

They crawled out of hells and battled demons. All so that they could reach their forever.

Seonghwa had it now.

And he’d never held anything tighter than the desire to see his entire life before him, and Hongjoong beside him through every part of it.

Seonghwa was loved. 

Hongjoong was free. 

Their hearts beat as one. Warm, slow, loving, real…

And human.

The stars and the future sang for them. 

And their love sang back, echoing and timeless and free- as strong and constant as the heartbeat that guided them.