Chapter Text
Luke stalked into his rooms (no, they were not HIS rooms), and flopped face first onto the ridiculously soft bed that dominated the center of the room. Like really, no bed should be this soft. It was like lying on a cloud. He sighed into the covers, scrunching them in his right fist. He shouldn’t let Vader get to him like that, but sometimes it was so hard to reconcile the man who he dreamed his father to be, and the man he ended up with as his actual father.
If only Vader would be truthful with him! But no, he was trying to “protect him”, which meant patronizing him. It wasn’t like Luke had literally been surviving on his own basically his entire life. Tatooine was a harsh environment, space just as much. Vader treated him like some unruly wayward child that needed a firm hand and discipline. He was 22 years old, for Sith’s sake.
And he was wrong about the Rebellion. He had seen up close and personal what the Empire had done to the galaxy, from the labor work camps to the slave mines of Kessel. And there was no excuse for Alderaan or the Death Star no matter what Vader said. It was just so hard to argue with him. His words got all tangled around in his mouth, and while he had passionate convictions, he lacked the ability to express them eloquently like Leia would have been able to.
Luke sighed. If only his father…
He stopped the thought before it could continue. He still felt so conflicted even after being with the man for two months. He just wanted something real from the man, but Vader refused to give him anything. He was just an unmovable stonewall when it came to the past, and while Vader may have wanted the past to stay buried, Luke sure didn’t. He was in essence, Vader’s past as well.
He deserved to know about his mother, about who his father was, pick out the lies Ben had told him versus what he had learned about the man so far. He felt so confused and conflicted, especially when it came to thoughts of Ben. Why hadn’t he told him? He understood intellectually that he and Ben had only spent so much time together, and the subject of Vader being his father would be a rather large and touchy subject…but still. He didn’t like being lied to or given avoidances or half-truths. His whole life felt like a lie, he didn’t need more.
Sitting up, he shook his head, trying to fling the depressing thoughts away. He knew Vader had good reasons for not wanting to revisit the past, but it wasn’t fair to Luke. He deserved answers, and he was going to get them. He wasn’t his father’s son for nothing.
Sliding to the floor at the foot of the bed, Luke crossed his legs and began to meditate. Calming his heartbeat and swirling thoughts, he sank into the Force, pushing past the suffocating presence of the Dark Side that always followed his father around like a dark cloud, and into the blessed warmth and light of the Light Side. He breathed in and out, calming himself. He needed to talk to Vader…his Father again, but in a rational and calm manner.
After mediating for several hours and feeling the Force flowing through him, he pushed himself up and walked towards Vader’s hyberbaric chamber. He knew Vader didn’t like to be disturbed there, but he needed some form of vulnerability on Vader’s part in order to begin having some form of a discussion that didn’t involve them both throwing objects or Vader force choking someone.
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Ani, I’m pregnant.
Those words had come back to haunt him ever since he had discovered Luke’s identity. The rage and desire he had felt when the rebel scum he had been interrogating had finally revealed the name of the pilot he had been chasing…and the desperation and joy at the revelation of the truth. The pilot was his dead son. He was her son. Vader had buried Anakin deep that fateful day, and had refused to ever think about her again, but the reveal of the name and the truth singing through the Force dragged up memories he had hoped to be forgotten.
Painful memories of her smile and laughter, her growing belly, and their joy at being new parents. He hadn’t felt ready then, and he sure didn’t feel ready now. The situation was unique, that was for certain, but he still couldn’t get control over it. Luke and his relationship was volatile and frustrating. Luke had brought back the forgotten feeling of joy that comes with parenthood, as well as the irritating side effects of having a rebellious child determined to go their own way.
Ugh, fatherhood was hard.
Did Luke not understand that he was keeping him here for a reason? That Palpatine would destroy Luke within an inch of his soul, and then just rebuild him as his perfect Sith apprentice? Vader couldn’t, wouldn’t let that happen. Not to the only thing that held the memory of her. Clenching his fist, he let the dark side flow through him and let the long burning anger strengthen his failing body. He wouldn’t let her die again. He would protect Luke no matter the cost, even if it cost him Luke’s love itself.
Vader was startled from his growing rage and the beginnings of his meditation into the best way to control his stubborn offspring, when a loud banging sound came from the outside of the chamber.
Was that...a knock?
The only personnel allowed in these rooms were Luke and Vader himself, and as Vader was currently in the pod, that left only one possibility as to who made the noise. Growling under his breath, he turned and pressed the button to open the chamber. The steam billowing from the pressure decrease swirled around the form of the very person he had been contemplating.
Luke stood there tall and proud, his uncertainly coupled with his desire to know ringing through the Force. Luke was there for a reason, and he wasn’t going to leave until he got what he came for.
“What is it?” Vader barked irritably, wincing inwardly at the harshness of the word.
As usual though, instead of being scared of it, Luke actually seemed emboldened by his tone. “We need to discuss some things Vader.” Luke held up a hand, forestalling protests on Vader’s part.
Luke took the next moment to gather himself as well as study the true face of his father that resided underneath the mask. The face of Anakin Skywalker. It was pale and sickly looking from lack of sunlight and heavily scarred with protruding veins and a lack of hair anywhere. In short, he looked nothing like the aura he portrayed outwards, that of a terrifying Darth Vader. And for the first time in his life, Luke looked upon the true face of his father, that of Anakin Skywalker, a face of a broken man resigned to his fate.
“Father….” He breathed out, the word escaping him before he could capture it and contemplate its utterance.
The man who was once Anakin Skywalker flinched and reached out to begin the sequence of putting back on his helmet, but Luke’s hand on his forestalled his attempt. Vader stared disbelievingly at Luke. This was the first time Luke had willingly touched him. The significance of the moment was not lost on either of them.
Luke finally broke the silence. “Please Father, let me look upon your real face. I want to talk to you, face to face and without masks.”
Letting go of his grip on Vader’s hand, he settled back and down, crossing his legs in front of Vader, in the position of a child ready to receive a story. Vader sighed, the air rattling out of his abused lungs. This was a conversation he had avoided for so long, but with Luke sitting there in front of him, open and desiring to know, he just couldn’t avoid the issue any longer.
“What do you want to know?” He finally wheezed out.
Luke straightened, victory evident in his eyes. “Who was my mother? What was she like?” he asked eagerly.
Vader sighed inwardly. He should have known that would have been the first question Luke asked. Ever since he had let Padme’s name slip when they were in the net, Luke had been dogging him to tell him more.
“She was an angel, my angel,” Vader finally replied. “She was beautiful and fiery, completely sure of her convictions and willing to defend them with her life. She was elected Queen of Naboo when she was only fourteen, and later was elected Senator. She was beloved by her people and everyone she met. I loved her the moment I met her. She was a Queen in hiding and I was just a slave boy from Tatoinee. She was perfect in every way. And she would have loved you with all her heart. She did, in fact, even before you were born.”
Luke’s eyes were glistening. Vader was startled by the emotion shown until he felt wetness on his papery thin cheek and realized he was tearing up as well. He didn’t know what to do with himself, and looked down at his crossed hands, unable to make eye contact with Luke. He was surprised a few seconds later when he felt Luke wrap his arms around his bulky form.
After a few seconds of sitting there stiffly, completely shell-shocked and unable to process or move or even function, let alone breathe (his son was hugging him!), he felt Luke let go, phantom limbs still clinging around him. He sat there staring at Luke, his voice unable to form words or his mind able to form a coherent thought.
He was surprised even further when Luke started laughing. Luke rocked back and forth, gasps and belly laughter erupting from him. Unbalanced, he fell over backward, tears falling from his eyes as he rolled around on the floor in front of Vader’s hyberatic chamber.
Vader sat there, confusion rippling through his entire body. What was happening to his son? Had he inhaled some poisonous fume? Did he need to check the levels of the oxygen in the rooms? Had he ingested something?
Luke propped himself up on his elbows, saw Vader’s face, and then started laughing again.
Seeing his son lying on the floor, cracking up, Vader felt his mouth start to twitch. It had grown into an almost full-grown smile when he finally regained his senses. “Luke, what are you doing?”
“I’m s-s-sorry Father,” Luke finally stammered out in between breaths. “If you could just see your face.”
“I haven’t seen my face in 22 years Luke, of course I don’t know what is so funny.”
Luke abruptly stopped laughing. He wiped the tears from his eyes and sat up, crossing his arms tightly across his chest. “You’ve haven’t seen your face in 22 years?” he asked quietly, subdued. “You mean…you’ve never seen what you look like… now?”
Vader felt coldness creeping within him. No, he hadn’t seen what he looked like. Not since he had lost Padme and had been put in the suit. He hadn’t cared to own a mirror or look at his own reflection. Why would he want to stare at the face of a deformed monster?
Luke was looking at him with what seemed akin to pity, but with an understanding that Vader desired no sympathy. “I’m glad I got the chance to see your face, your true face. The face of Anakin Skywalker.”
Vader flinched. “That is not my name,” he hissed.
“It is the name of your true self, you’ve only forgotten!”
“That name no longer has any meaning for me, and it shouldn’t for you either. I am your father, not that weakling.”
“Anakin Skywalker was my father, you’ve just buried him so deep that you’ve deluded yourself! You can’t kill that which is a part of you. And if you claim parentage to me, you claim ownership of that name, as I will only consider Anakin to be my father, not you.”
Vader sat back stunned at his son’s passionate words. Was he right? How could he possibly claim parentage to the child of Anakin Skywalker when he himself had destroyed any remnant or meaning of that name? Did he have any right to? No… he didn’t. Not when the child sitting in front of him deserved his true father, not this mockery that remained. However, at the same time… Luke had clearly accepted that he used to be Anakin Skywalker, and maybe with enough time, he could persuade him to love the man he is now and join the Dark Side with him.
He clenched his fist. They would be the most powerful force in the galaxy! Sideous would have no chance against them and he could finally enact the protocols and peace he had desired for the galaxy from the very beginning! Closing his eyes, he sank into the Force, using Luke’s presence as a grounding beacon to guide his vision for the future.
Flashes of light passed in front of his eyes. Blades striking and twirling, each trying to gain an opening. The air thick with sulfur and ash. He saw himself from afar battling with a hooded and cloaked figure draped with the coldness of the Dark Side of the Force. He watched as he made a strong advance and the hood fell back from his opponent’s face. Vader stumbled backwards, stunned at the sight of the yellow eyes shining with hatred staring out from his son’s face. Luke’s face was twisted into an angry snarl; any trace of the once pure and light-filled boy vanished into the all-consuming rage of the Dark Side. Vader dropped to his knees as he stared in horror, watching the last remnant remaining of Padme strike a killing blow to his opponent. He watched himself go down and Luke stand over him, his lightsaber pointed at his throat.
“Why Luke?” he heard himself whisper, a silent plea evident in his voice. “
Because you are in my way. Like you said Father,” Luke replied in a sneering tone, “Power is everything.”
Vader watched, unable to look away as his son plunged his lightsaber into Vader’s chest.
Vader rose from the force vision, unaware he was screaming. He hadn’t even known that his vocal cords were still capable of making those sounds until his ears regained their hearing. Luke stood before him; his eyes back to their blessed blue, unsure of how to help.
“FATHER!” he shouted, holding Vader tightly in his grip, panic evident in his voice. “Snap out it! What’s happening? What’s wrong?”
Vader heard his voice coming from far away. He could only see the vision in front of him, the sight of his beautiful son, marred by the Dark Side, trying to kill him. His hate-filled yellow eyes staring daggers into the ripped remnants that remained of Anakin Skywalker’s soul. He swore instantly in that moment he would be damned before he would ever let that happen to his son.
He had only ever wanted power for Luke, and believed the Dark Side the only path to his aims, but if that was the cost? That was not a price he was willing to pay. Not for anything. He would not sacrifice the bright and passionate soul he had come to know over the last two months for the monster he would become. Vader came back to himself slowly, finding himself still being shaken and shouted at by a concerned Luke.
“Father? Can you hear me?”
Vader breathed in several cycles, calming his racing heart before patting Luke’s arm. “I’m fine, Luke,” he gasped. “It was just a strong force vision.”
Luke leaned back from his frantic posture, somewhat calmed, but still holding onto Vader’s arms. “A force vision? Of what? The future?”
“Yes. What I saw there…” Vader stopped, unable to continue or burden Luke with the knowledge of what he could become, what he could have driven him to be. “What I saw can never come to pass.”
Vader thought for several moments, knowing what he needed to do, but still unwilling to follow through. He had just gotten his son back! He couldn’t lose him again! And yet, if Luke stayed, he would be in danger from him. Vader felt resolve harden in his heart. Yes, he must let Luke go for his own good.
Pulling back from Luke, he pressed the button that would put his helmet back on. Once he had assumed the persona of Darth Vader once more, he strode from the hyperbaric chamber and grabbed Luke’s arm in passing. Luke remained still, confusion at Vader’s actions ringing through the Force until he was forced to follow Vader by the strong grip on his arm. He stumbled after Vader, trying desperately to regain his footing.
“What are you doing? Where are we going?”
Vader didn’t answer him. He knew that if he looked at his son or faltered in his resolve, he would march Luke straight back to his room and lock him in there and never let him out until the galaxy crumbled into dust.
Pulling Luke along beside him, he marched through the corridors, Luke’s protests ringing in his ears. When he had reached his personal hanger, he summoned one of his officers over. All the personnel in the hanger were staring at Vader with strong curiosity tempered with a slight edge of fear.
“Clear the hanger. I want everyone gone but the bare bones of the crew. And have the prisoner’s X-Wing and Artoo unit primed and ready in five.”
The officer saluted and then scurried off to do his bidding. Vader chanced a glance at Luke, who was standing there with his mouth open and surprise written all over his face.
“What are you doing?” Luke asked, shocked. “And are you telling me you had my ship and Artoo this entire time?!”
“Of course. I had them retrieved as soon as you were brought on board. I couldn’t very well let Artoo call for help, now could I? He’s too crafty for his own good.”
“You act like you know him.”
“We’ve had a few run-ins in the past.”
“What?!”
“Yes. Now quiet down.”
Luke planted his feet and squared off against Vader. “No, not until you tell me what’s going on. One minute we’re finally getting somewhere, then you shut down and have a panic attack over a force vision, and now we’re in the hanger and you’re retrieving my X-Wing, which you’ve apparently had the whole time!” His chest heaved and he crossed his arms. “I deserve to know what’s going on.”
Vader debated several moments on the best way to proceed. Finally, he settled on the truth. “I’m letting you go.”
Luke paused, shock blaring out in the Force. “You’re what now?”
“I am letting you go. But not without conditions.”
“Go on.” Luke said, suspicious evident in his tone and posture.
“I will let you go, as long as you promise to meet with me once a standard month. I will leave a comlink on board where I can be reached. My code will be the only one inputed.”
“And what would we be doing during these meetings?”
“I want to learn more about you. These past two months all we have done is fight. I want to get to know my son. I promise I won’t try and capture you again or attempt to turn you to the Dark Side. And in return, I will tell you more about your mother and my past, as well as continue to teach you about the Force. Do we have a deal?”
Luke stepped back and turned around, taking a moment to contemplate Vader’s offer. After a minute, he turned back around and said, “And if I refuse to meet with you?”
“Then I will respectfully accept your decision.” Vader paused, “Luke, I know you have no reason to trust me or even want to continue this relationship, but… look into the Force, you will see that my offer is genuine.”
Luke closed his eyes, sinking into the swirling mass of the Force. He looked over Vader’s words, assessing them for any deceit or trickery. He found nothing but truth ringing from the Force about Vader’s words. He was sincere. But why the sudden change of heart? Just what had he see in that vision? It was clearly bad enough to change his entire tune about Luke's fate in his hands. Luke mulled over his options. As much as he hated everything Vader stood for… he just couldn’t seem to bring himself to hate the man himself. He was his father, the man he had desired to know since he was a child. And with this offer, he could learn about the man that was Anakin Skywalker, and maybe, just maybe, try and turn Vader back to the light.
Luke squared his shoulders, his decision made. “I will accept your offer…Father.”
Luke held out his hand, in ready acceptance of this new and fledging bond he felt forming between Vader and him. He knew Vader felt it too as Vader brushed against the thin force link between them and sent pride down it to him. Luke smiled as Vader clasped his hand firmly, the leather glove callous but firm against his palm.
Together, they turned and waited in silence as the crew prepped Luke’s X-Wing, the time for words between them over. As soon as his ship was ready, Vader pressed a comlink into Luke’s hand. Luke nodded once at Vader, walked over to his ship, climbed up the ladder, and settled himself into the cockpit. He grinned as Artoo’s greeting flashed across the screen.
“Yeah, I missed you too buddy.”
Strapping his crash webbing in place and adjusting his helmet, he waited until the cockpit had closed before pressing on the accelerator. He chanced one last glance out the window at Vader, and waved. He wasn’t sure what had just happened, but as he looked down at the comlink, he knew his life (and Vader’s) were about to change forever. Blasting out of the hanger, he whooped as he entered the expanse of stars, the Alliance and his friends before him.
Goodbye my son.
Till we meet again, Father.