Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

I don’t want to confess it. I know I shouldn’t confess it.

But I do.

‘He doesn’t want me,’ I say.

Frieza doesn’t want me.

I’m busy picking at the skin of my fingers, but what I really want to pick at is my obviously disease riddled brain. Scoop out the hurt and confusion and the plain pathetic little floaty bits that are my never-ending thoughts. And not to forget my heart. It’s all tight and small, and I want to massage away the ache. It’s the most egregious thing—feeling all this over him.

An overbearing, annoying, little intergalactic grey thing.

Trying not to be truly pathetic (half-way there, notably), by not wallowing in my grief; the grief being at how I've been swindled, gaslighted, and lied to, is fairly hard. The dramatic spiel I have conjured up at the injustice of it all is on the tip of my tongue.

One little spark, and I’ll explode. Or breakdown.

It’s just so confusing. Wasn’t Frieza meant to be the one who wanted me? Yet now it's all switcheroo. We’ve traded places and I don’t have to pretend, only accept, that I’m the one who now craves him. When I think about it really hard, in the deep and darkest part of my lingering sanity, I know how that one little play was all a lie to begin with. 

Frieza never wanted me. 

Not emotionally, and certainly not physically.

Like duh. I knew it all along and I’m still shocked.

I am only a pawn. A strategy. Game play.

I groan, slapping my hands to my face and puncturing out a dramatic sob. I’ve won the award for biggest idiot. ‘I look like a fool right now.’ 

‘An alive fool, at the very least.’ An annoying voice quickly retorts. That voice of course belongs to the extremely nosey Berryblue. Urgh. I crave pity right now, not scorn. 

I snap my head in her direction. ‘Do you mind?’ I say. ‘This is meant to be a private conversation.’ I pointedly direct a tip of the head in Whis’s direction. ‘Between Whis and me.’

She has the nerve to look Whis up and down like he is nothing more than the scuff marks on a shoe. 'Be careful,' she warns me. ‘Whatever you tell him will be between you, him, and Lord Beerus.’

Berryblue has a point. Annoyingly.

But does it seem like I’m in the correct frame of mind to be rational or wary of consequences right now? I'm already suffering ramifications, so why not just bulldoze myself into even more trouble? It's either me sing-songing my woes to Whis, or Berryblue herself. And she herself isn't exactly a neutral party in all of this. Her Lord and saviour, Frieza, is yet to be in her bad books and I am the book of bad.

All I need is just a good long moan and pity party, (I’m thinking an hour-long gossip sesh, tops), and then I’ll be cured of my sadness and insanity.

Or, that’s the plan. I’ve nothing else.

Besides, even though Whis is the attendee of Beerus, is he not still Team Frieza and me? Our number one cheerleader. (The only one, possibly. I don’t think I’d even class myself as part of the club.)

Berryblue, with a sneer and a scoff at my lack of articulated defence, (see? She must realise something is definitely wrong with me!) flounces out without any more fanfare. She just notably turns to me at the door, eyeing me with scorn. ‘Be careful.’

I grumble. I’m always careful. I am just being very emotionally driven right now. I’ll just get Whis to commit to both a spoken oath and a blood pact, to limit any looming disasters from sparking up, and that should suffice, right?

‘I’d appreciate it,’ I say to Whis, all awkward. 'if, er, Beerus, doesn’t really get wind of how I'm feeling. How I’m coping.'

Without a doubt I know Whis's true loyalties lie with Beerus. I'm not that delusional. But isn't the angel actively rooting for me? Besides, all this hurt and confusion that is laying heavily within my psyche gives me too little care to act any more than indifferent to the knowledge that Beerus may use it against us. It’s weighing too heavily on me for me to pretend that all is okay. I need explanations—rational ones.

Whis can offer me that, at least.

… Right?

At this point, it’s him or the walls.

‘It's just that... something happened,’ that's the biggest understatement ever, ‘and Frieza, well… I’m confused.’

‘Why?’ Whis tips his head. ‘Do you doubt your lord Frieza’s motives?’

Do I doubt Frieza’s motives? I downright question them! How annoying that I feel both vindicated yet contradicted over Frieza’s deceitful manipulation. I don’t know what he even wants from anymore. What he ever wanted to begin with. It’s like I’m just a pawn for him to use as he sees fit, and I’m now trying to pitifully clamour for that one little bit of acceptance I can still potentially garner from him. 

I really shouldn’t be airing my worries with Whis. I purse my lips and look at the floor. I need to get a grip, and fast. ‘When we…’ I breath out heavily. ‘Frieza and me… when we…’ I can’t even say it. ‘Last night.’

‘When you mated, yes.’ Whis says it so simply that it causes me to zombify into a corpse of cringe. Nothing that happened last night was “simple”. But I am surprised.

‘You know?’ I blink wildly. Word sure gets around quick here.

Whis smiles. ‘Why, of course! It is all one can think about.' 

Oh. Totally not weird. My shoulders crowd my ears. ‘Well, about that.’ I pick at my fingers. Here it goes. I’m saying it into existence. ‘Frieza didn’t exactly… want to be involved with all that. And I lost all sort of,’ I wince, thinking back on it all. ‘Control.’

Whis nods. As though he hears stuff like this as an everyday occurrence. ‘It is completely permissible of course, regarding your circumstances.’

‘No.’ I disagree. And then it all spews out of me. ‘It’s not. It’s not how it should have gone down. I wanted…’ I squirm before clamouring on. ‘I wanted him to lose control. I would’ve dealt with that better. It’s what I expected, right? I never thought that I’d be the one to lose control like that, and now I have this burden weighing heavily on me. This suggestion that I have a part to play, when I just want to be a passive participant. I didn't want to be the one to take charge and now the onus is on myself. Do you understand where I'm coming from? Me… him... The roles have been reversed. He no longer wants me. But I… in certain ways… want him now. I don’t want to admit it that I did, or... do. But it happened. I don’t want to be the pursuer. I want to be pursued. At least in that accord, no-one can judge me. I was the one to be pitied, and now I have to take ownership in what happened.' 

Whis's smile is small, but respectful. I can see Frieza's throne behind his shoulder from where we stand. Life was so different back then, when I had slept on it. I had had no responsibility.

‘Humans are strange,’ Whis points out. ‘The end is all the same. The conclusion doesn't change. You acting upon it surely leads to the same ending as him acting upon it.’

He is not that dense. ‘The context changes. Now, I’m the guilty party. I am the one who made that step forward. I am the one who, if things were to swivel back around, would I not have used it against him?’ I definitely would have. ‘I was so pathetic.’

I don’t want the responsibility of knowing that I have some part to play in all of this. That I have an active part of me that has showed my hand, and in doing so defines me as this type of person that makes me vulnerable. It's scary.

Frieza likes, no, craves things he cannot have. And now that he is allowed to have me, I have become simply conquered. Fodder. There’s no game there anymore. He’s going to lose interest. He’s lost it already.

‘Frieza can perfectly handle a human, may I remind you. Physically, you did not overpower him. If anything, his biology overpowered you.’

Urgh, this body betrayal mess. Yes, I can admit that that part did speed up the entire process. ‘Why didn't he throw me off of him?' I say. As soon as I was making moves he should've locked me in my room and thrown away the hand-print scanner. ‘Because he wanted to see me like that. None of this would've happened if he had just the common sense to actually do the right thing for once. He wanted me to look pathetic. He wanted me crawling on my hands and knees to him, and trust me,’ my laugh is pathetic, ‘he got that in spade loads.’ 

‘It sounds to me that Frieza did want you then, in some capacity.’

I shake my head. ‘No,’ I say categorically. ‘He wanted to shove my desire in my face. He wanted to embarrass me. He acted totally indifferent, you know? Like I wasn't even there. And then I accuse myself of being delusional, but isn't that what he led me to believe? That he abducted me because he wanted me? He's just using me. I don't know or even understand what problem Beerus and him have, but I'm fodder in the midst of all their destruction. I should've known all along. What exactly can me, a human, even offer Frieza? I'm just a joke. A one-up. Look at the little human. Let's tell her some secrets and stir up some intergalactic nonsense.’

‘Oh no-no-no,' Whis says. ‘You are very special to Frieza, do not doubt that. I don’t doubt that. Because of you, he has his Golden Form. Frieza reaps that reward day in and day out. He knows the significance his culture deems that form.’

I wince. Curse that ugly, garish form. I never want to see even a flash of it again. ‘Apparently you told him that me being gone won’t mean the form falters.’

‘You being dead doesn’t mean the form suddenly skedaddles out of existence. After all, if the two of you were to have offspring, he’d still need to the form to protect them. It’s all evolutionary, of course.’

I cringe. Offspring?! Puh-lease. 

‘But,’ Whis adds. ‘The form does serve him better with your nearness.’

‘Apparently so,’ I say. ‘But still, he already has the power-up. I don’t see what else he gains from me sticking around. Since when does a being like him need even more power.’

Whis does that annoying look, the slightly belittling one. ‘Other than your cherished bond,' cue my snort, ‘You don’t believe you offer Frieza anything else?’

I think for all of two seconds. ‘No.’ But the niggling part of my brain that knows there's some hidden reason to as why Whis even suggested the possibility has me second guessing. ‘Do you think I do?’

‘I must admit, Frieza has a patience with you that I have seen him seldom give any other being. There must be something there.' 

Patience! I've given Frieza a lot of that myself and look where it now has me. 

‘You need to look beyond,’ Whis says. 

I sigh. ‘I know. But it's so hard to make heads or tails of anything. And people,’ heavy on Whis himself, ‘just skirt around my questions whilst offering only elusive thoughts themselves.’

‘No.’ He points his staff out, and knocks on the glass, where deep, dark space frames us. ‘Look beyond.’

‘Oh,’ I mumble sheepishly, and peep out. ‘You want me to actually look beyond. Alright, I guess.’ And I look. It feels meditative, in a way. We are flying in the midst of rubble. Thousands upon thousands of little meteoroids, as far as the eye can see. The protection shields around the ship no doubt our saving grace from getting caved in by the gigantic boulders. That bit isn’t so meditative. ‘You're going to say some mumbo-jumbo on how I should see the stars through the clouds or something.’

Whis smiles. ‘Oh no. I want you to actually see the clouds. This space debris. Awfully dangerous for us if the ship wasn't protected, but thankfully your Lord Frieza sees all.’

I stare dumbfounded back at him. ‘Space debris? From where?'

‘It's quite an arresting sight, isn't it? Just a few pieces of asteroids… comets…’ Whis giggles. ‘Maybe one or two planets.’

‘One or two planets?’

‘It’s best if you don’t find out.’

My brows furrow. He obviously wants me to know. ‘Well now I want to find out, don't I?’

Whis looks at me. Tips his head. ‘You can’t blame him.’

‘Blame who.’

He gives me a pointed stare.

I look back out. Grit my teeth. ‘Why does Frieza do this nonsense?’ I scrunch up my face. I feel the urge to stomp my foot. ‘In what world does Frieza think it’s an okay thing to do? He's seriously deranged, Whis. Do you know that? What did these planets do to him, huh? I mean, he knows how I feel about it. He's shoving all this practically right in my face. When does he even have time to do all this nonsense? Does he just write it in his diary? Oh - Berryblue? Schedule me my hourly quota for today, please.’

‘Funnily enough, it happened fairly late last night.’

‘But Frieza was with me last night.’ I explain.

Whis arched an eyebrow.

I rolled my eyes. ‘What.’

‘Well,’ Whis chuckles. ‘It seems that your Frieza has the ability to outsource his direction of power. A meditative state that supplants his energy to beyond.’

‘That all sounds like complete and utter gibberish to me, Whis.’

‘You say Frieza was indifferent to you last night. This display,’ he points outside, ‘suggests differently. For whatever reason, Frieza did not want you to bear the brunt of his desire and so detached himself from the situation by refocusing this projection outwards, instead of inwards, between the two of you.’

‘Nu-uh.’ This is unbelievable. ‘So what you're trying to say to me, is that Frieza, instead of choosing to fuck me, instead chose to throw all that passion out into space. Yeah. Right. That makes me feel so much better. Yet another reason I am reasonable for the death of no doubt millions! I'm so pathetic Frieza wouldn't engage with me. Not couldn't. Wouldn't.’

‘He cares for you.’

‘Cares!’

‘He is looking out for your best interests. And that is why you're so upset. Because you cannot blame him. You are the one who acted upon him. You cannot claim that you were taken advantage of. In the long run, you will thank this restraint.’

Biological urges and all, I was taken advantage of. But I'm more so hurt because of Frieza's indifference. Now hearing that Frieza wasn't totally indifferent as I was led to believe... I'm confused.

Whis smiles. ‘It's a lot to take in, human.’

‘No,' I object. 'The truth is what I'm having trouble with. Trying to distinguish what is an act, and what is true. But I suppose I have all the time in the world to think on it, right? Stuck on this metal tin can.' 

Whis chortles. ‘Have you not been informed yet?’

‘Of what?’ I eye Whis.  

‘There’ll be little time for thinking. We are set for Earth.’

‘Earth!’ The aim was to get away from Earth, was it not? Now we’re going all the way back?

The squeal that comes from Whis has me backtracking. This really can't be good. ‘Why yes, of course Earth,’ Whis says, a knowing glint in his eyes. ‘It is time to attend your nuptials!’

My mouth goes dry. ‘My what.’

‘Your wedding!’

You’d think I’d be jumping for joy, coming back to Earth. But the truth is that it scares me. Terrifies me. Earth is where everyone I love (barring Buddy) lives, and with a flick of a switch Earth can kaboom. I’m putting them all in danger. It’s another setup. Another trap.

I know it.

Beerus certainly knows it.

We’re on the same page here. But that doesn’t stop him from giving me the rundown.

‘If I find out that you and Frieza are playing me for a fool, there will be consequences,’ Beerus leads the team brief. Pinpointing me, like I’m the mastermind behind this whole expedition, and not the little wiggly sneaky worm himself.

‘Ok.’ I say, rather flippantly. Beerus is going to believe what Beerus wants to believe. Anyone with two braincells to rub together would’ve realised by now that I’m the furthest thing away from self-sufficiency.

‘You hearing me? Little girl?’

I nod. I nod until my brain rattles. And then carry-on nodding just to make sure Beerus is clear that I’m one hundred percent on the same level as him. Yes, I hear you. Yes, you’re all completely loony. And yes, my eyes are also inwardly rolling.

Beerus carries on, as is his due. ‘No funny business. None at all. You are not in the clear just yet, human.’ His glare is like a stab. ‘The less you blabber, the better. In fact, try not to speak at all.’

‘Gotcha.’

Beerus’s eyes narrow. ‘Watch it kid. And get Bulma off your trail. Convince her that you do love Frieza, and that all of this is just your wildest dreams come true.’

A thousand and one eyes staring at my every move. Sure, this will be swell. Not only do I have Beerus overseeing my downfall, but I’ll also have the astute eyes of Bulma who never misses a beat.

This is totally doable. Bulma won’t notice a thing. She won’t suspect a thing.

What a load of baloney. Is Beerus trying to convince me, or himself?

‘And you,’ Beerus looks behind me.

Looks at Frieza. 

‘Control her.’

I bite my tongue. Like Frieza could be bothered to. I hate him. My body physically reacts at the thought of last night.

He won’t stop looking at me. Frieza, that is. He thinks he can just slink along the walls, swallow me up in these huge stares, and that I'll go back to being on my knees, thanking him for his grace.

Nope. He’s not even a blip on my radar. Frieza’s old news. I’m so over it. Over him.

Buddy, on the other hand, is not over Frieza. My elderly (and so feeble minded) dog has himself lost the plot and garnered some new unfounded attraction to Frieza. Buddy has completely disregarded his loyalties to his ever-faithful best friend (aka me) and has been swindled to the dark side (aka Frieza, his new overlord).

Buddy’s wagging tail thumps the wall and floor.

What a traitor.

It’s pathetic. Frieza isn’t even paying him any attention. Kinda makes me hate Frieza even more.

Beerus curls his lips at Buddy, and I swear he was about to mutter something along the lines of ‘get the accursed beast out of here’ but we get distracted by a different and louder noise.

The clunk of hydraulics announces the descent of the ship. Soon we’ll have the all clear for the fall of the ramp and I’ll be able to set foot on Earth once again. We’ve landed, but my heart is still doing somersaults up in the sky.

I hate the drama of it all, this waiting.

I’m staring at the doors like my will alone will open them.

But something happens.

Inside of me.

A synapse flickers in my brain. A wash of tingles spreads across my body, and my limbs, only a moment ago so highly strung, turn loose and heady.

A myriad of sensations flips my womb.

I know what this is.

I shoot around. ‘What are you doing!’ I shout at Frieza. I should’ve asked why, because it’s obvious from the get-go that he’s gone golden.

He doesn’t say anything.

‘Stop it!’ I glare. How can the Golden form affect me so much? As soon as he sparks up, my body seems to associate it with lust.

It’s manipulative, that’s what it is.

Frieza scoffs.

My fists tighten. I clench my teeth. ‘Change form. Now.’

‘No.’

‘Yes.’

‘Let your desire be apparent. It’ll serve you well.’

He wants to talk about desire. I go to stomp over, but Whis stops me. I blab on him. ‘It’s not fair!’ I tattle to Whis. ‘Tell Frieza to stop.’

Beerus adds his two cents. ‘No. Keep it going, Frieza.’

I’m feeling hot under the collar. ‘It’s not fair!’

‘Shut up and smile,’ Beerus says. ‘Quit the whinging.’

Am I overreacting? Hell no. ‘It’s embarrassing,’ I point out.

Beerus, of course, shows little care. ‘You two are meant to be a—’ he visibly shivers, ‘—thing. So start acting like it.’

‘It can’t all be me!’ I retort. ‘What about his desire for me!’ I snap back. ‘Why do I have to look like the pathetic one.’

Beerus looks me up and down. He barks out a laugh. ‘You are the pathetic one, human.’

Whis tuts, pats my arm. It makes me uneasy. ‘Let Frieza showboat. Let him show off how you react to him.’

‘But it should go both ways!’ I point out.

‘Stop your moaning human and put a damn smile on your face. You’ve been warned once to keep the façade, so stick with Frieza’s help and you may just live,’ Beerus says.

I grit my teeth.

Fine. Whatever. Hypocrisy and all. No biggie.

The ramp falls, and I see Capsule Corp.

Salad.

I’ve got salad before me.

It’s fresh, I’ll give it that.

But seriously, Mom?

My so-called Bridal Brunch is already depressing enough, and that’s without the greens. This is my first human meal in a while, and its bleeding salad.

And to top it all off, it’s unlikely we’re even going to see dessert. Earth’s most likely going to be dust by that point.

Everyone is petering around each other. I haven’t so much spoken a word. Not even by choice, either, because as soon as I had stepped of that ramp my mother had accosted me and shoved us all into our allotted chairs. I don’t think my Mom understands the concept of a Bridal Brunch though, because she’s got all and sundry here. Whis and Beerus, of course, are seated right across from me. Frieza, to my side. Both Videl and Bulma’s eyes probe me, but so far, I have managed to steadily ignore them. In fact, the only two not here are Goku and Vegeta.

They’re probably off fighting somewhere.

I’m here fighting with my mental woes, staring glumly at my salad.

It’s awkward.

Very, very, awkward.

Mom pipes up. ‘So, you two…’ Her smile is clumsy as she looks at Frieza and me. ‘You both look well.’

I grimace a smile. ‘Oh. Yeah.’

Mom tilts her head. ‘I wish you two would’ve have given us more time to meet sooner. That would’ve been the done thing.’

‘Sorry,’ I clear my throat. ‘We’ve just been a little… busy.’

Heat spreads across my cheeks.

‘Right,’ Mom gives me a stern but knowing look.

‘Yes,’ I say. ‘Uhm. Frieza has a very busy time schedule.’

‘Oh, yes?’ Mom becomes intrigued. ‘I was wondering when you were going to inform me of what your fiancé does for a living.’

Mom can’t read the room. I want to shake her and tell her that Frieza is evil. He doesn’t do anything for a living, only for dying. He’s a killer, and everyone at this table knows that.

I know that. Yet I’m supposedly marrying him. Yet my insides quake when he turns gold. Oh Kami. I bite my lip. ‘Frieza is in the… property market.’

Mom blinks with surprise. ‘Really?’

‘Uh huh,’ I play with my food. ‘Demolition—'

I stop short.

And eyeball him.

Frieza ignores me. But I can’t ignore that.

The tail across my thigh.

It’s not sexual, really. Just kind of flummoxing.

My mouth gapes open.

My train of thought has long gone.

Erm.

‘So tell me,’ I hear my Mom distantly ask. Her voice now seeming so far away, my attention hyper focus on my touch with Frieza. ‘Do we see any children in the foreseeable future?’

A few people choke on their drinks.

‘I—I…’

I’m looking, dazedly, at the tail.

My desire unrepentant.

Desire for simplicity. For Frieza’s acknowledgment. Here, in my very own literal lap. No-one can see but me.

Beerus swirls a straw in his drink. ‘Sorry Mom, but no. No breeding is allowed.’ He puts bluntly.

I’m confused. It’s not like I’ve been paying attention to the conversation. ‘Breeding? Who’s breeding?’

‘Are you listening, Frieza?’ Beerus then turns to me. ‘Not you. I know that, human.’

‘Me?’ I squeak. Who said anything about me. I’m totally on board with the whole no-children deal, thank you very much. No need to convince me.

Frieza doesn't reply.

Beerus aims a glare at Frieza and then repeats himself. ‘Do not breed her.’

I notice Frieza’s lip curl.

Oh Kami. Is this really dinner table talk?

Beerus’s teeth grit. ‘You. Will. Not. Breed. That. Damn. Female.’

I have a vision of stray ki blasts whistling about the place in a few moments. A firework bonanza aimed straight at Frieza and me.

‘Frieza.’ Beerus growls. ‘Are you heeding me?’

Bulma seems to have had enough, because she drops her cutlery atop her plate with an ear wringing clash. ‘Do you mind!’ She sneers. ‘I am trying to eat here!’

It’s the first thing she has said all night.

I feel guilt, because I haven’t even said hello to her. I haven’t even said hello to Videl. But I can’t stomach the push and pull of their pity. After all, I have to still pretend Frieza is my end all.

Beerus just carries on glaring at Frieza.

Oh boy.

‘Is it even possible?’ Gohan asks. He seems to not notice the tension at the table. His scholarly mind at the forefront of his thinking. 

‘Gohan,’ Videl warns. I’ve missed her voice. ‘Keep out of it,’ I hear her mumble under her breath. At least she has the memo.

A tug appears at my arm, and I look down to an adorably smiley Goten. ‘I think that your baby with Frieza would be soo cute!’  

Oh Kami. How am I to play this? Dopey and love smitten, or realistic? No matter what direction I go in, I’m going to be looked at like I’m nuts. ‘Do you really think so?’ I play along, even though I need this conversation to divert and move on, quickly.

‘Yeah! Totally!’ Goten nods enthusiastically. ‘I bet it’d be super powerful too.’

Ah. The thing behind every Saiyan’s motives. And I can sure bet that the “super powerful” side of it is what I think Beerus has his big concern over. That’s a no venture, bud.

Trunks pipes up and gives his two cents. ‘I think that the baby would look so goofy.’ He shrugs, like it’s obvious. ‘Haven’t you noticed Frieza’s feet, Goten? They kinda creep me out. They look like chicken feet. What if the baby has three toes? That’d be so weird.’

Erm. We can all hear you, Trunks.

‘In another world,’ Bulma points out, ‘You could’ve had a tail, Trunks. So I wouldn’t be so judgy if I were you.’

Trunks just mutters under his breath a ‘So what? Tails are cool.’

Goten turns back to me. ‘Ooo. Will your baby have a tail?’

I glance at Frieza for a second. ‘I—who knows?’  

‘Dad told me that us half human, half Saiyan children are super strong!’ Goten recalls his earlier statement. ‘Dad says that I am way stronger than he was at my age. We just don’t really want to train or be serious, but I think that is a lie, because I love training with Gohan! Do you think it will be the same for your baby? Will they be even stronger than Frieza?’

I blink. Damage control. ‘I mean, it doesn’t really concern me. I’m not actually having a baby. Nor one anytime soon. But sure, Frieza is pretty strong, isn’t he? A lot stronger than me, for sure. Who knows how the baby will take?’

‘Is that true Whis?’ Beerus murmurs to Whis.

‘Oh! Yes. She is definitely not carrying Frieza’s whelp.’

‘Not that!’ Beerus curses. ‘‘Will any of these ugly sprogs be a cause of concern for me?!’

Ugly sprogs? Fancy saying that.

Whis points a fork. ‘Well the potential is all there of course. Destiny wouldn’t have pushed them together if life wouldn’t be viable. Look at our little human-Saiyan hybrids. I wonder if having three toes is a recessive trait or not. Having five would surely be a massive asset to brawling.’ He turns to the kids. ‘Remember children, what is one of the most important rules in the arts of fighting?’

Trunks and Goten both answer like they’ve been taught it to death. ‘To have a good, solid stance,’ they drone.

‘That’s right!’ Whis turns to us. ‘If anything, I advise that the two of you get started on procreating as soon as possible. For the greater good of universe 7! Who knows when the next Tournament will come?’

Great. Whis is treating my hypothetical offspring as fodder for his enjoyment.

Frieza, instead of coming to my defence and explain at how much he’d love to see us take the (bleurgh) next step, hops on to a train of disgust. ‘I think I would just go so far as to kill myself and return back to Hell if I ever had to deal with scurrying, screaming runts.’ He turns to me. ‘Do not presume that I have any interest in performing paternal duties.’

I believe it time to make Frieza eat his own medicine. Beerus and Whis want me to act like I’m in love with Frieza? Let it rip. I smile all sickly sweet to the crowd. ‘I want loads of children with Frieza,’ I say. Okay, and so I’m being a tad over the top because I want to prove a point. And I’m dismissing Frieza kind of just for the sake of disagreeing. But if I am to play the role of his soon-to-be-wife, then I must play my heart out. Along with all wifely duties, I will fake my way into the perfect role. It’ll be failsafe against Beerus. See? I want to make babies with the alien! I must be in it for the long haul.

Bulma pauses. ‘You do?’

I nod. ‘Totally. I want a huge family. This is how much I respect my Lord Frieza, because I will do whatever it takes to make his lineage a grand one. Our offspring will surpass our wildest imagination.’

I think I may be laying it on a bit too thick.

Frieza curls a lip. ‘I do not care for dribbling, blubbering, urchins who get their tails twisted into knots or need constant skin to skin contact to maintain their body heat. I will take no part in the rearing.’

I look at him. ‘Of course,’ I nod, and stroke his hand. Paw. Whatever that limb is called on an Alien. ‘You will be out; protecting us from the stars while I lay in my den.’

I hear my Mom coo in the distance.

Either she is too gullible, because I also heard Videl gag, or I am better at lying than I thought.

‘No progeny of Frieza’s is yet sanctioned, human.’ Beerus sneers. ‘And do not get your pitiful hopes up, because that is unlikely to change.’

Thank Kami for that.

The silence is awkward. I go back to stabbing my salad like it was Frieza’s heart.

It’s a while before anyone speaks again, but lo and behold, it has to be my Mom.

‘As is custom,’ she begins, ‘I believe it is time we make way for our next event, as is tradition, before we venture on to our main courses.’

I pause. Huh?

‘A Moirai tradition—’

I butt in with a sharp tone. ‘—Mom. No.’

‘It is time for the bestowment ceremony!’

My jaw drops open. ‘Mom!’ I hush.

‘What?’ She blinks all blasé at me.

‘Frieza is…’ I try to not put it bluntly, but it just falls out. ‘As you can clearly see… foreign.’

A bloody mass-murdering raving lunatic who has no desire to actual marry me and follow through with any of this wedding lark is more of the issue, but we carry on.

‘And?’

She’s hard work. ‘My fiancé—’ shiver incoming with that word ‘—has not been made aware of… that tradition.’

She flings a hand up at me. ‘Oh pish posh. His maid—’

‘Maid?’ I say, flabbergasted. ‘What maid have you already managed to talk to within the ten minutes that I have been here?’

‘Yes, maid,’ Mom’s voice has a tinge of annoyance with my interruption. As if she dares direct that tone straight at me like she was not the one poking her nose into things that do not concern her! ‘That plump little lady. You know the one? The one with blue skin and that little purple bob. I’ve always thought you’d suit her hair if only you’d—’

‘Berryblue!’ I cry out. That little nosey parker. That menace. Two peas in a pod. ‘You’ve already met Berryblue? Mom, look, she hates my guts. This is a complete set up.’

‘Now, now,’ mom says. ‘It’s rude to interrupt.’

I feel the panic rising through me. I’ll look like a worser fool than I already do. ‘Mom, please. There’s not going to be a bestowment ceremony.’

‘Why yes there is. Of course there is. You must. It’s tradition.’

‘Mom,’ I say. ‘Does Frieza to you really look like the traditional kind?’

She purses her lips and looks him up and down. ‘More traditional than you suppose, young lady. Your Frieza has done everything to the book, and he will expect this to be the same. And yes, that Berryblue, that maid—the two of us have already talked it out. I must say I was tremendously surprised. It is almost like his own culture mirrors our own… or he has done his research out of respect? I don’t know, but it’ll be expected. I do know that.’

‘What do you mean, everything to the book? Mom, I don’t think you truly understand. We’re having a wedding. That’s all.’

‘You can’t honestly expect me to believe that, do you? You have both already committed Fatum. You cannot just do one and not the others.’

I blurt out a confused and defensive ‘No we haven’t,’ before I could stop myself.

A wash of horror turns me cold.

Fatum.

The sea of faces around me blur.

My heart skips a beat, and now I think I’m hyperventilating.

Frieza… well he had taken me.

Coincidence.

It has to be.

‘What’s wrong?’ Mom says.

‘Nothing.’ My voice is dry and croaky.

‘Isn’t this what you want?’ Mom turns stern. ‘I thought… Videl had told me that—’

‘No, no.’ I shake my head. ‘Videl was right. It is what I wanted. What I do want. I just never realised.’

‘Realised what, darling?’

My smile is small and fake.

That Frieza may have wanted me for a myriad more reasons than I could’ve ever guessed at. I was right to believe that Frieza was always one stop ahead.

‘What on Earth is Fatum?’ Beerus orders. He misses nothing.

I look at Whis.

And of course Whis is smirking, like he’s known all along. 

Finally, I look at Frieza.

I can’t do this anymore.

I slowly stand up from the table. ‘I’m sorry,’ I stammer. ‘I…’ I look around me in a daze. A blur of faces seated before me. ‘I think… I need to go and—’

Videl stands up, hauling Pan up into her arms. ‘We need to go and change Pan’s diaper. Don’t we, Bulma?’

Bulma smiles nervously. ‘Yes, let me show you both where to go.’ Bulma tugs on my arm. ‘Please excuse us all,’ she calls back.

I distantly hear Gohan mumbling in confusion at how Pan doesn’t even wear diapers anymore.

‘What’s going on?’ Videl launches.

Pan plays with a toy on the bed.

Oh. Well. Where does she want me to start? I shrug, like all the worries in the world aren’t on top of my shoulders. ‘Well, I’m in love with Frieza.’

‘What’s that to do with anything?’ Videl glares. ‘I want the truth. What is going on? Why did you just act like that?’

Little does she know my lie was skirting truth. ‘I’m getting married. I’m just… overwhelmed, is all.’

‘Yes,’ she slams down some fancy pants looking invitation onto the bedside table. ‘I gathered that when I received this.’

I pause. ‘Did you RSVP?’

‘Stop changing the conversation. I’m on about what happened out there. Why did you freeze up like that.’

‘I didn’t freeze up,’ I blink at her.

‘Yes, you did.’

‘I… I just got all flustered. That’s all. Like I said. I’m getting married. It’s kind of crazy, huh? I guess it just hit me.’

‘You’re not being honest.’

‘As if you’d believe my honesty, Videl.’

Videl rolls her eyes and flings her hands at me, like she’s awash with the conversation. ‘Bulma, get at her. She’s being utterly impossible at the moment.’

Wonderful. Now I have the double-edged sword of Videl and Bulma to contend with. If I get out of this alive it’d be a miracle. ‘Look,’ I say, as I turn to face the two of them. ‘You can either make this easy for me, and accept my decision, or you can make my life hell.’

‘Oh stop it,’ Bulma scolds. ‘Don’t start acting all innocent now. Did you forget that you had rang me, terrified at the prospect of Frieza?’

‘Yeah well,’ she’s got me there, ‘relationships are tricky, aren’t they?’

Videl shakes her head. ‘Since when did Frieza find out about the Moirai?’

I blanch. I try not to freeze up again. ‘What’s that got to do with anything?’

‘It has everything to do with it!’ Bulma says.

‘It really doesn’t,’ I say. ‘Frieza doesn’t know anything about… that. Bulma, even you shouldn’t know anything about that. There’s no way Frieza does. Mom just blindsided me a little.'

‘You can’t really believe that Frieza hasn’t a clue,’ Videl says. ‘It makes total sense.’

‘No. I don’t believe Frieza knows.’ I say. ‘Look—me being Moirai—it has never come up.’

‘So why else would Frieza be with you?’

I pause. ‘That’s real tactful. Thanks Videl. You know, you sound an awful lot like Beerus right now. I take it your Team Beerus, after all?’

‘Well, it fits, doesn’t it? It’s the only thing that makes sense.’

I scoff. ‘Yeah. Like Frieza has no other reason for wanting me, right? Like being Moirai is all I’m good for—’

‘You know Videl doesn’t mean it like that,’ Bulma sticks up for her. ‘But be reasonable here and think on it. Frieza’s followed your mating traditions to the absolute T. Your mom even assumed. I know about the Fatum and your reaction just then has said it all.’  

I pale. ‘I wouldn’t say to the exact T. Anyway, it’s all coincidental. So coincidental in fact, that it’s barely crossed my mind. Not once—not ever—have I assumed that Frieza kidnapped me because I was Moirai.’

‘Does Beerus know?’

‘I don’t see how he can,’ I say. ‘And I don’t see why he should.’

‘You do realise that once Beerus finds out, he won’t let this swing?’

‘Beerus isn’t going to find out. Nor is Frieza.’ Though it may be a little too late for that…

Bulma shakes her head. Implores me with big blue eyes. ‘Frieza kidnapped you.’

‘I know. If anyone knows that then it’s me.’

‘And have you figured out why Frieza kidnapped you?’

Well I assumed it was because I hadn’t blabbed on that secret. That was the original plot. I shrug. ‘That all depends on who you’re asking. If you ask Beerus—it was to kill me. And if you ask Whis—it was to be with me.’

‘And if you were to ask Frieza?’ Videl says.

I glare at her.

‘He’s using you.’ Videl says.

‘So?’

‘And you’ve accepted it.’

‘Well, things happen, don’t they? It’s fate.’

Videl shakes her head, like she can’t believe it. ‘Ever since I’ve known you, ever since we were little girls in Aisa, you’ve made it crystal clear that you did not want the Moirai life. And now look at you? You’ve thrown it all away. You’ve become the Moirai pin-up poster girl.’

‘I have given up the Moirai life. Even if I was taken because I was Moirai, then Frieza chose wrongly, didn’t he?’

First my mom brings it up, and now Bulma and Videl too. Railroading me about being Moirai. It has nothing to do with any of this. I understand it. Their worries. But this whole mess is so convoluted that being Moirai hasn’t even crossed my mind for a second. It’s just another spanner in the works.

You see, Aisa in Moirai—it’s a very matriarchal society. We are female led, and my mom also happens to be one of the main figureheads. We’re celebrated because of history, our pedigree, and our desirability.  

People around the world and throughout have scoured for the Moirai. And within tradition, girls are taken from the village.

Historically, girls were just straight up kidnapped. But with the advent of modernity, no way is that acceptable any longer. No-one is actually kidnapped anymore. It’s all a farce for the old tradition. It’s called the Fatum, and an intrinsic part of the Fatum is that the girl agrees to being symbolically “kidnapped”.

Not that some people don’t do it under false pretences. Most girls are swindled. Believing they’re in love. I’ve seen it more times than I can count. Our women and girls fall in love with some visitor who pledges that they are also only there for love, just for it all to eventually fall apart.

Once people find out you're Moirai, they only want one thing. And that is to use you.

Bulma pulls me to the side. ‘You must talk to Frieza about this.’

‘Now why would I do that?’

‘Because you supposedly love him and so will want to share everything with him?’ Videl pipes up.

I glare at her.

‘Because,’ Bulma says. ‘The likelihood is that Frieza does already know about the Moirai. And that you being Moirai, whether you want to hide that fact or not, has an important part to play in all of this.’  

‘Do not try to shove a wedge in-between Frieza and me, Bulma. It’s not going to help, and this isn’t what you think it is. I’m not some gullible little girl.’

And after that, I plead the fifth. I feign illness, hand in my sick notice, and skedaddle out of there.

The bestowment ceremony can kiss my behind.

It’s just me, and old reliable. Emphasis on the old.

Poor Buddy. 

I don’t know what I’ll do without him.

I pour soapy suds over Buddy’s head as I kneel into the bath. It’s not really a bath, per se. More like a pool. You see, I’m back on Frieza’s ship (it’s the place I feel like I can make the least amount of trouble) as we’re parked up like a caravan. (No way am I staying in the Capsule Corp, that’d be heaps of trouble.)

I was hoping that giving Buddy a bath would be relaxing. Something mundane to take my mind off of this entire mess. And luckily, Buddy is at that stage of his life where he’s not all too bothered about bathtime anymore.

Unluckily, someone does seem to be bothered.

Frieza is of course, watching the entire thing with vacant curiosity.

I play with thoughts of ignoring him. But alas, my own curiosity gets the better of me.

‘What is your problem?’ I say. (Happy also to admit that I do not deign even a smidge of a glance at him. So there! Think on that.) I carry on massaging Buddy’s fur coat, unthinkingly going with the autocue, awareness selected entirely upon Buddy. Not.

‘I do not care for your tone.’

My teeth grit. ‘You do not seem to care for much. Do you?

‘I do not care for your tone. For your insults, or for your pathetic pet. Yet you are focusing all his attention on that mutt like I am not here to receive you.’

I stop. Utter codswallop. ‘Well go then.’

‘No. I find myself before you for your own sake, human.’

My sake? I scoff. ‘You’ve had a sulk on you all day. You’re unbelievable, you know! No-one believes this stupid story you’re trying to tell. In fact, it’s like you’ve given up on it completely!’

‘And what story may that be?’

I glare at him. Oh by Kami’s grave I glare at him. ‘That we… We…’ I can’t even get the word out. I close my eyes and try to catch my breath. ‘We’re meant to… like each other.’

‘I am here to receive you.’

Is he not hearing what I’m saying?

‘What? So you can embarrass me again?’ I give him the cold shoulder.

He steps closer. ‘Speak clearly, consort.’

I shrug him off. I don’t want to talk any longer. He’s an idiot if he can’t read the room. If he can’t understand why I’m at all peeved off with him.

Buddy gives me a long, wet lick on the face but it’s no good. The tears are already blurring my vision.

I cry when I get angry.

Frieza smiles when he’s angry.

See? We cannot be less alike.

I’m holding it fairly well, I think, as I try to blink away the emotion and focus on Buddy’s bath, but a pathetic sniff seeps from me, and Frieza just will not leave.

He grabs my hair, pulls my head back. I’m staring at him framed by the ceiling.

‘Why are you crying?’ he sneers.

I try to shrug him away.

‘Tell me.’ He tightens his grip.

My mouth frowns. ‘Fatum, Frieza.’ He had heard my Mom. Fatum. ‘Have you ever heard of it?’

‘I have no care for human fronts. Kneel.’

I’m already kneeling. Duh. ‘The Fatum, Frieza. Have you heard of it?’

He scoffs. ‘Has is not yet crossed your pallid mind that I have no desire to talk about the nonsense of humanity?’

I shoot up. ‘You sure have a desire to practice the nonsense of humanity!’

‘You fail to recall that it was yourself that belittled me into your human ceremony?’

‘I’m not on about the wedding or proposal, Frieza. I’m on about the Fatum. I’m on about you abducting me.’ My forehead scrunches up. It all makes total sense. Everyone was right and I am just blind. ‘You know I am from Moirai.’ I shake my head. ‘I don’t know who or when you were told, but you found out. You thought you could use me. Kami, I was so dumb for it to never have occurred to me. I mean, I knew I was missing something, right? Now it adds up.’

‘I have no care or thought to whatever Moirai is.’  

I let it out. ‘So you don’t care that the Moirai have visions? You claim to not know?’ My laugh is pitiful. ‘Your sordid plan has nothing to do with wanting to take advantage of that? Of me?’

His eyes zero in on mine. ‘What,’ he leans in closer, ‘would I care, for that, human?’

I swallow. ‘Where did you learn of it? Of us?’ I ask. ‘You must have found out somehow. You must have learnt that it is sacrilege to give visions outside of the frame of Fatum. That it is the woman’s gift to her partner—these visions. I see it now—why you took me. You knew,’ I whisper. ‘All along you knew. Here is me, fretting all this time thinking that you only felt the littlest of attachment for me because of your Golden form, or to play up Beerus… But no. It is because I am Moirai. It is because you have the need for my “supposed” sight.’

His upper lip curls. ‘Then you are still with faults, Consort, because I do not make it an agenda of mine to disgrace myself with knowledge of your planet Earth.’

‘Don’t lie to me.’

‘Lie? I am the begetter of many fabrications for the simplicity of yourself and yourself only. I do not care whether I lie. I tell these falsehoods for your own beggared behalf. You do not even know where these stories of yours begin and end, but I do.’

‘So you didn’t know I was Moirai when you swindled me into this drama? You didn’t see fit to use it for your own accord, not knowing that I’m practically defunct at it?’

‘How could I have known such an insufficient thing like that?’

‘So it was only coincidental that you abduct me, similar to my tradition? It’s only pure coincidence that you have the bestowment already settled, according to Berryblue?’

‘Yes. Coincidence.’

‘I thought so too. But you nominated me your Consort. You take me from my home. You set me up. Your golden form didn’t need any of that.  Is that what this has all been about?’ I say. My heart squeezes. ‘You thought you were getting a two for one deal, huh? Stick me into your drama and also get your kicks out of my supposed visions that have never manifested?’

‘How much clearer do I have to be, you insufferable human?’

‘You’re using me!’

He hisses.

Hisses.

‘I should have let my instincts kill you right there and then for what you did,' he accuses. ‘That night you saw me gold.’

‘In the atrium?’ I say. ‘You mean the night you set me up?’

‘Yes. Human. What you did.’

‘What I did?’ I am flabbergasted. ‘I was not the one who concocted that plan of yours to rule universe-kind by stirring up a couple of Saiyans and a God of Destruction, was I? That was you that got us into this mess.’

His head tilts. ‘Remember much of that night, do we?’

I blanch. I remember… parts. A golden smokescreen.

‘You fail to understand that within everything I have done, I have acted as your protector. You believe that I set you up? I have guarded your insignificant mortal life.’

‘How delusional can you be!’ I croak. ‘I’m in this mess because of you! We’ve already made it clear that you set me up.’    

Frieza’s eyes narrow. ‘You have visions.’

‘No.’ I shake my head. ‘That’s where you’re had. I don’t. Despite being Moirai—I have never once had a vision.’

‘You have visions,’ he says. Like he’s telling me.

‘No I don’t,’ I repeat.

He thumbs the area under my eye, and the stroke of his touch is like a shock of tenderness to my nerves. It pulls at my heart strings. He’s telling the truth, I think. Whatever Frieza is saying—he’s being transparent. And it’s going to hurt me. I know it.

‘It makes sense, human.’

My face falls.

‘I’ve seen a vision of yours,’ he says. In a tone I’ve never heard from him before. A tone that borders on pity.  

I hold my breath.

‘You see,’ he begins. ‘I did not know how you knew. But you saw me gold. Your first time seeing your gift to me and I… You turned stagnant. Trancelike. You spoke of something in sermon.’

My head shakes, no. He’s wrong.

‘You spoke of a planet,’ Frieza says.

‘No. No I didn’t,’ I say. ‘You did.’

He ignores me. ‘You spoke about a planet being destroyed by the power of me. For the part desire of Beerus.’

‘I didn’t,’ I reiterate. ‘I couldn’t have. I didn’t even know Beerus back then.’

‘Exactly,’ Frieza says.

‘Exactly what?’ I blurt out. ‘We’re going around in circles here. You are lying. You were the one who said all of that. You even reminded me of it last night—remember?’ The breath hurries from me. ‘You can’t pin this on me now. You told me.’

‘I lied.’ He says. ‘Do you remember me telling you? No. I don’t think you do. I just told you I had.’

I pause. ‘If that’s the truth then why did you tell Beerus that you had told me? I’m not buying it, you know.’

‘Why?’ He chuckles. ‘You seem to have little belief in me. Have I not guarded you all this time? I simply framed your perception. I parted your onus upon myself. To protect you more than you have ever believed. You think it my fault for this mess, human? I played little part in it. It was you who unearthed the secret of the past, and the reason has now come to fruition. You have this Moirai-blood.’

My laugh is weak. ‘But you’re lying, and you’re believing your own lies.’ I shake my head. ‘You should really do your research before you try to change your tale, Frieza. You see? You’ve jumped the gun too early. That’s not how Moirai work. It wouldn’t have been possible for me to have ever had a vision about a planet being blown up. Moirai do not have visions of the past.’

‘You did.’

‘Morai have visions, yes. But we do not see the past. We see the…’

I stop short.

I think it dawns on the both of us at the same time. The words are stuck in my throat. The blood rushes from my face. 

‘… the future.’

It was a vision of the future.